Finals are over! Yupee! Sorry for the delay anyway... I didn't think it would take me this long to post this. So here we are – let's continue with the story! This is the last chapter so enjoy! :o) And special thanks to Hana CZ - you rock! :o) And I had to repost this - the site was being kind of problematic - sorry for repeated alerts if you have me or the story on them!

Jack woke up in the middle of the night, there was something tickling his nose. Very reluctantly he opened his eyes only to find blond hair – everywhere. He smirked, knowing that Sam just shifted in their sleep and pressed herself more fully to his body. He couldn't help it – he just smiled and after readjusting their position so they both would be comfortable, he caressed her skin, put her hair out of her face and kissed her forehead tenderly. God – he really did love her.

It didn't wake her up but it made her react. She nuzzled her nose into his neck, sighed contently and wrapped her arm around his torso possessively. It seemed to him she was dreaming – obviously something nice. Again, he could just smile, she was unbelievable.

He could remember the first time she had wrapped herself around him like this while sleeping. He was so surprised! During the night they usually moved away from each other. His guess would be that after years of training how to stay away it would simply take some time to adjust and all. He was usually the one finding her in the bed in the morning and pressing his front to her back, needing to feel her. So all those times when she was the one initiating the contact like this were pure pleasure. He wouldn't trade them for anything. They were pure and intimate, just theirs.

Jack knew that they had ended up in … rather compromising position several times during the last years while sleeping in the same tent or close to each other by the campfire but they had never talked about it. Neither did their teammates. It seemed to him that they all accepted the fact that they had become friends and hugs of comfort, even those unintentional ones, were okay. Besides they all knew that both him and Sam needed the contact from time to time – just to stay sane, to survive.

He couldn't fall back to sleep but he didn't really mind. He was enjoying the time he had when he could watch his partner, lover and friend like this – without her knowing, relaxed and absolutely content – hopefully also very happy. He guessed she knew about this habit anyway but she had never complained so he assumed she was okay with it.

He still couldn't believe that he spoiled their first date though! He had it all planned. The dinner and dance, then one delicious dessert, walk through the city… and then he had few surprises for her. But no, he just had to be clumsy. Now with bruised ribs and cast on his wrist he was practically useless. Luckily he got the light cast this time. In few days he would have to go for a check-up though. The swelling was not bad so hopefully there would be no need for adjusting the cast. But because they had to re-settle his wrist, he knew it was important to go and see his doctor later.

He really missed Janet in days like these. She knew how to handle him, what to do, what to say. He would probably always miss her – her smile, those friendly big eyes, her manners and the jokes. She could understand him on many levels and still have the upper hand over him when she wanted to. She was one fine doctor – probably the only one he had ever really liked on both professional and personal level. He knew that all of them missed her terribly. It was such a waste… like with Jacob. Sometimes being human really sucked.

He felt a bit sleepy in few minutes so he sent silent prayer up to Heaven or whatever it was up there anyway, he needed his son and those good people to take care of each other – and to look after him, after Sam after Cassie and their close friends. He had already lost too much – he was not ready to face it again.

Before falling asleep he realized that there were things he should do, things he should talk about with Sam. Because this time he was doing this right, he was not about to screw up this relationship. He had already risked too much, he had already done too many bad things, he just had to set some things right.

In the morning Jack stretched in the bed, trying to find the beautiful warm body he liked so much to hug in the morning before fully waking up. The first thing he noticed was the ache on his side – that would be the bruised ribs. The second thing was an empty bed where Sam was supposed to be sleeping. That made him open his eyes. And really, she was not there. Huh, strange…

He looked around the bedroom and found Sam sitting in the armchair they had there, wrapped in a blanket from couch, holding a cup of something. She didn't exactly look sleepy, he assumed she'd been up for some time now. Not that he would understand that.

"What are you doing out there? Watching me?"

"I couldn't sleep…"

"Something wrong?"

"No, of course not."

"Then come back to bed."

"Jack…"

"Don't argue… just come back to bed. Please?"

And after a moment she smiled, nodded and crawled back to bed. She couldn't resist him – not when he was smiling at her like that, his eyes full of life and something warm and absolutely adorable, not when he said please. Jack was sitting there, leaning against the headboard so she made herself comfortable sitting in between his legs, her back to his front. It took a moment but then they found the right position they both could enjoy.

"So… any plans for today?"

"Sorry to break it to you but our plans never work out…" Jack told her and made her smile. He was right about that one.

"It's raining outside…"

"So we stay inside."

"I knew you were smart, Carter." He said and it earned him a playful smack.

"Jack?"

"Yeah?"

"How's your arm and the ribs?"

"I'm a bit sore but luckily in no pain at all…"

"Liar."

"I'm not lying…" He said and kissed her neck.

"Jack?"

"Shh, I'm trying to prove a point here." And again he kissed her again. And he took his time with exploring and admiring her neck, her shoulders and also with sides of her face.

"Jack, you're hurt… we shouldn't…"

"You want me to stop?" He asked and run his hand down her side, tickling her ribs gently and stopping only when he could place his palm on bare flesh – soft warm flesh. God knew he didn't want to stop, not at all.

"Jack…" She breathed and was sure it made him smile smugly. She couldn't mind less though.

"Yes?" He whispered into her ear and moved his hand up – slowly, while he placed his other hand on her thigh. He had the cast on his wrist but his fingers were quite okay.

"Don't stop…" Sam finally said and turned her head so he could kiss her properly.

So what, maybe it wasn't as smooth and nice and romantic as it was supposed to be during their big night after the first date but it was very nice anyway. Sometimes their passion had to step back because of Jack's cast and bruised ribs but they managed quite well. And what more – all those funny moments making them laugh made the whole experience so much better.

Later, much much later Sam covered Jack's cast with a plastic bag so they could take a shower. He kept on complaining but knew she was right so he let her take care of him, for once. Besides he was painfully aware of one little fact – their week would end soon and she would be gone. So he was definitely planning on enjoying every minute with her he could. Even if it meant letting her put his hand into a plastic bag.

"Jack, what time is it?"

"I honestly have no idea. Why?"

"I'm starving!"

"We can cook something…"

"We? You mean that you can cook something, right?"

"Well, I know how to and you have two good hands so we can try…" He tried to joke. Neither could expect that it would be such fun. He was bossing her around and she was letting him. They were having fun while trying to find their way in the kitchen like this. While cooking together they were okay. But this was the first time she was trying to follow his instructions and not to burn anything!

"I knew you were no genius when it comes to kitchen but this?"

"I'm full of surprises…" She winked at him then. And then finished the meal without his help much to his big surprise. He kept on watching her, staring at her. She was humming some song he knew but couldn't place, she got everything ready and all she needed from him was to stay away and give her some space to move around.

"So all the time you were just…?"

"What?" She asked sweetly.

"You can cook!" He exclaimed, shocked and amused.

"And?" Another innocent question…

"How much exactly I don't know about you, Carter?"

"Keep on wondering…" She said, kissed the tip of his nose playfully and took their meal to the living room. She just told him to take the plates and forks but other than that she left him standing there, completely baffled.

They had their meal in the living room, finding out that it was an early lunch actually. Jack kept on asking her about small things – he wanted to be sure he knew her well – but she wouldn't budge. He knew the important things and there would be time to find the other stuff later. God knew he had his own secrets and things to tell.

They spent the next days together, enjoying each other. So what, they had a small argument, maybe two, but given the circumstances it was still okay. They both thought it would be much more difficult for them to be at ease around each other. But it was actually easy and it felt natural to them. There was nothing to be afraid of.

It was suddenly the last evening they had together. At first Jack wanted to take her out but she asked him not to. She wanted to stay at home.

"Why?"

"It's our last evening, Jack. God knows when we will get another chance to be together…"

"Doesn't mean we can't go out…"

"Doesn't mean we can't stay at home…" She suggested.

And as usually, hearing her referring to the house as to her home – their home – made him agree and just prepare some pasta they could eat on the couch while watching a movie.

Sam knew that there was something bothering him. She just couldn't figure out what it was. She was hoping that it wasn't serious, that it was just about her leaving so soon and all the feelings coming along with it. She wanted to talk to him but knew him better than to try to get the information from him. She knew he would tell her – in his own time.

Or she was hoping so. It was making her angry but still there were times when she had doubts about their ability to work as intimate partners. It was stupid, she knew. Jack loved her and was serious about the relationship. Maybe it was just difficult sometimes on her to accept some things. Like now.

They were watching a movie together on the couch – something with Audrey Hepburn. Sam loved her. Her mom used to love her and it was something she easily inherited. Jack kept on playing with her hair, not really paying attention to the movie – not that she minded.

She was thinking about trying to talk to him but decided against it. She just settled more comfortably into his arms. It was all she needed – him.

Jack was painfully aware of the fact that she was about to leave in few hours. And he just couldn't accept it. He used to think that it would be easy but he was so wrong!

Nobody could tell when they would get the chance to see each other. Of course they would be able to have phone calls and exchange e-mails and all the normal usual stuff but it could take months before being with her on the couch like this.

He couldn't help himself. He had to wonder… how did this happen? How was it even possible that they have made it through the years to this point?

Jack kissed her hair and closed his eyes for a minute. His mind was filled with memories and it took all his willpower not to shout and run. He knew that she loved him, he knew she wanted to be with him, he knew it was she who came to him on Christmas, God he knew she was sure about this relationship – but how could she?

He had hurt her so many times. He had done so many bad things to her and to her family, to her friends. Through the years some of his orders and decisions had put fire into her eyes and made her so angry, hurt. It seemed to be impossible for them to overcome those feelings – remorse, guilt, anger, and all the other ones. And yet here they were.

"I'm gonna miss you so much…" He said.

"Shh…" She tried to sooth his worried voice.

"Don't go, Sam, please don't go." He whispered into her ear – and he couldn't believe he had actually said that out loud.

"I don't want to go. But I have no other choice right now."

"I know…" With that he tried to bring her even closer to his body, he needed to feel every inch of her pressed to him – alive and vibrant. He needed to be sure that she was really there, at least for the one last evening.

Too many times in the past he thought that he could – and would – lose her with the morning coming. It didn't take him long after they'd started working together to be glad for every single day with her. He could have lost her so many times – and there would be too many things with no closure. Life was just too unpredictable.

"I love you." He told her suddenly.

"I love you too, Jack." She answered with content sigh.

"I don't know since when but I had been sure about the depth of my inappropriate feelings since you've been down in that cell…" He admitted and gave her time to accept it. He knew she had been surprised just now - not understanding the reason he was telling her all that. So he gave her a minute and then he continued. "But I couldn't allow myself to be in love with you. I just couldn't."

"Jack?" She asked him a bit confused.

"I was hoping you would move on, I thought that you would realize that I'm not the right guy to be interested in and that you would just find somebody else."

"Jack…"

"I know I know, we both tried to move on and it didn't work out and I'm glad it didn't because I don't know who and where I would be without you…"

She turned in his arms so she could look at him. She thought he was just joking or trying something but she saw something deep in his eyes – he was being honest with her, completely open, no barriers, no defenses, he was opening up to her, showing her his soul and the depths of his heart.

"Sam, I just want to clear the air. I'm not saying we have to do it now but I want to do it. Maybe slowly, one step at a time. I did things, I made decisions and I gave orders you didn't like, you didn't approve with… I know I hurt you and I want to … I just…"

"I hurt you equally as much... but it's all gone now, Jack." She told him softly.

"No, not all of it. I wish I knew how to tell you..." And he couldn't finish the sentence. He really didn't know how. But she could see where he was heading with that. And she couldn't decide about what to do. Was he really asking her to talk to him about all the pain, guilt and sorrow? He couldn't be... but then there was the look in his eyes, the plea he said, it was all written there - plain for her to see. He really wanted to talk about it. It made little sense to her though.

"You sure you want to do this? To bring it all up?" She asked – surprised by the emotions in her voice as much as she was surprised by those in his.

"No."

"Some things should stay where they are. In the past." And she sounded pretty resolute.

"I know... God I know... But I think we should... at least the very important ones that are like the biggest elephant possible sitting in the room with us all the time and we are just too good at avoiding them." He told her a bit frustrated and anxious. Very anxious.

"I... Jack I can't..."

"I'm not saying we have to talk about everything... Just about some of it." He said and gave her time to think about it. He knew how fast was her brain working but after few minutes of utter silence he was beginning to get very scared and nervous.

"I can't, Jack… it took me a long time to accept everything and learn how to live with it. I can't bring it all up and neither should you."

"You don't have to talk if you don't want to… but please, let me say what I want to, what I need to. Maybe not now, not today, but someday."

"It's not a good idea."

"Please, Sam."

"Jack…" She wanted to stop him but couldn't. He took a deep breath and she knew he would say something very difficult and important for him. She was scared.

"My marriage with Sara failed because I was not talking to her, because I kept things from her, because I was a jerk and she gave up on me eventually. And I don't blame her."

"I'm not her..."

"I know that... And I'm not willing to do the same mistakes now. Not with you."

"We won't."

"Sam, I want this thing between us to work. And if it means going through some painful memories, mine and yours, then I say it's worth it. No secrets, no hidden guilt. Just us. We should have done that a long ago but we couldn't. Now we can. But it takes two to tango…"

He knew she would need to think, he knew he should go – but she held onto him for dear life, so he stayed where he was but silent. He knew he was asking her a lot, damn he was asking himself a lot – but deep down he was sure that it was the right thing to do. He wanted to have future with her, he really couldn't imagine his life without her and so he needed to settle the past.

After few minutes she buried her face into his chest and in about an hour of utter silence she fell asleep. It warmed his heart – as always. But this time it was a bittersweet moment.

They moved into their bed later, silently, desperately holding each other for dear life. All their worries and anxious feelings were overwritten by something different. They had last few hours and they just needed to be close and to feel each other.

Their last morning was a bit awkward in the beginning but both knew it was not because of the issue from last evening – it was just and because she was leaving that day.

Jack thought they would have breakfast and go for a walk or something but she didn't give him a chance to leave the bed till very late morning. He wasn't really complaining though. He needed her as much as she needed him, obviously.

Sam did a lot of thinking through the morning… before he woke up. It was all just a start – but maybe, just maybe, it was not bad, not at all. Difficult maybe, but not bad. He was right about one thing – there were issues they should deal with instead of trying to forget. She knew from her own personal experience that without settling the past the future could be very tricky. But she was not ready - not at all, not now and not for everything. It was too much too soon.

But truth was that she needed this future with Jack to be built on something solid. She knew he was her future and that was all that mattered to her.

Later she couldn't deny herself – and him as well – the goodbye proper kiss. That was a necessary thing to do, they wouldn't survive without it. There was no way of telling when they would meet again – let alone spend some quality time together.

Jack was feeling really bad – their week was over and in few minutes she would be gone. And he wanted to ask her to stay, he wanted her to stay. He knew she couldn't but it didn't matter – he wanted her there with him.

When he was about to ask her she just gave him a quick kiss, took her things and left the house. She walked down to the main road to catch a cab. She was hurting and she could feel the tears in her eyes – damn!

Jack was standing in the living room, looking around and he felt his heart ache. He was getting old – he could feel tears in his eyes. It wasn't fair! And instead of giving her the perfect last day in DC he had spoiled everything by doing something stupid like trying to open old wounds... sure - what would be better than to rub salt into them all over again? What had he been thinking? She didn't bring it up again and neither did he... yet he could tell that it would take a lot of time for this particular thing to heal. He screwed up - royally - again.

But then he was taken out of his silent thinking... he heard the door and saw her there, breathing heavily. It looked like she had been running.

"Ask me again." She said.

"Don't go." He replied, not really knowing what was she asking but this was the only thing he could think about.

Then she dropped her things and made those few steps into his arms. He kissed her with all love and passion he had in himself and knew she could probably feel those tears on his cheeks. Later he realized those were not only his. He kept on apologizing and she was trying to make him stop with that. Later she was apologizing as well. And then they both stayed silent, locked in firm embrace, breathing the same air, their hearts erratically beating, not finding a silent quiet moment to rest.

"It's not supposed to be this difficult…"

"Sam…"

"It's not fair."

"No, it's not."

They spent next few minutes in each other's arms but both knew that she had to go and that it was not in his powers to stop her. He took her face into his hands – which was still a bit tricky with the cast on his hand but he managed fairly well, caressed her cheeks and kissed her again. It was their goodbye and both knew it.

Without a word she turned, took her things and left – devastated as he was. But it was the way things had to be – at least for now. And they knew it.

When Sam arrived she found her plants watered – her neighbor was a nice woman, she was taking care of her things when she was away. So she also found a package on her table. She opened it, curious. And there she found at least 14 pairs of fluffy socks. And not just plain socks but all colorful – with pictures, dots, stripes, with laughing cows, dancing planes, with dough-nuts and with the Simpsons, with Albert Einstein and some math formulas, everything. There was a note attached to them saying "Your feet are always cold, Carter! Use these to warm you up when I'm not around. Love, Jack" That made her smile. He could be sweet when he wanted to. And also one smug General. But he was right about her cold feet...

Then she found something else. Down there in the box there was a Moleskin notebook. And the note said "Use this to write down everything I did to upset you. I will make it up to you. I promise!" At first she wanted to cry but then she just smiled. The package was dated few days ago so…

Well she was definitely going to add something in there.

She sat down onto her couch, the box on her lap, she took her phone and called him.

"O'Neill." He answered, not really paying attention to who was on the other line.

"I lied." She said instead of greeting and knew it would throw him off.

"What?" He asked, confused a bit, trying to process the information.

"When I said I didn't envy her the world she was living in, her reality, I lied. I did envy her. She had you, she had the wedding picture and then you kissed her… "

At that Jack stopped doing the paperwork he was doing and took a deep breath. He asked for this, didn't he?

"And the next time we are together we can perhaps talk about this and maybe some other things but ... I need time, Jack. I think we both do." She said and with closed eyes waited for his response. This was the best she could possibly give him. Hopefully it would be enough - for now.

He sighed, felt moisture in his eyes and smile at tugging at his lips. He had fallen for the best woman in several galaxies. He was far from forgiven but getting there...

"Well as I see it we have all the time in the world... just you and me." He told her and knew it would make her giggle - these cheesy comments always could do the trick!

"Remind me again how we are supposed to stay sane the following weeks?"

"I might have few suggestions..." He suggested and she laughed on the other end of the line. Both happy that she hadn't asked about the following months. That would hurt too much. That would be just awfully long.

And because his paperwork could wait and he was not expecting any other phone calls, there were no calls to make he could pay attention to her. And she was at home so… They talked through the next few hours about things... well - about rather embarrassing and very funny things that had happened to them. It was like remembering years of friendship and experiences neither wanted to forget.

However it made them forget about their current situation for a moment. They felt connected, at least a tiny little bit. And it was an important connection neither wanted to lose.

"Can I keep you on the line?"

"Huh?"

"I should try to get some sleep but I don't want to be saying goodbye. So can I keep you on the line?"

"Yes, of course you can."

And so she went to sleep with his voice talking to her, later on while listening to him breathing on the other end. It was cheesy and it was stupid and childish and like cut out from a romantic movie but it brought comfort to both of them. After this week and all that happened they felt closer to each other, even more closer than ever before. And both knew that this was just the beginning.

The next weeks were rather boring – and lonely. Very lonely. For both of them.

Jack was in his office, trying not to argue with one of the Senators. The man was an ass and he had never liked him. Now he was trying to explain something but there was no point. And the worst thing? There was no bloody way how he could get away!

It took him hours before he could be alone in the office again. And there came a knock.

"Unless the world is about to be destroyed I am not here…"

He heard the door and then footsteps. The last time this happened Sam appeared. So he opened his eyes – curious - but there was no sign of Sam. Only Anne was standing there, with tray in her hands and package under her arm.

"Sorry, Sir. Not the woman you would want to see…"

He didn't even bother with answering. Was he really that transparent?

"I have some cake for you and coffee… and also package from Nevada, Sir."

"Huh?" Now he was curious.

"And Mr. Braga called, he had to reschedule so you are free for the rest of the afternoon."

"Really?" He asked and Anne had troubles with keeping on her serious face. His eyes lit up like her nephew's on the Christmas morning.

"Well of course to anyone that calls you are currently unavailable and having an important meeting."

"Where would I be without you?"

"You don't want to know, Sir." She answered with smile on her face. With a nod she turned around and left him there, alone with cake, coffee and mysterious package.

He opened the package and found the notebook he had sent Sam earlier. There was no note there, nothing, just the notebook. He opened it and couldn't hold back the smile. At third line he started to grin and with the fifth one he was laughing.

She didn't write down her complains. Not at all. She wrote the headline "Here comes the list of what happened while I was in DC..." and instead of writing down all the things he had done to upset her she added her comments about what happened while she was in DC. And he knew that he would have to lock this notebook somewhere because more than half of the things she had written down were very private!

Who would have thought… He spoiled her! Or maybe she had always had this hidden wild side. There were things he yet had to discover about her. And he was looking forward to it!

But what really got him was the next page. It started with "The next time we are together we will…" and there she added some suggestions. Some of them casual and some of them – again very private. Some of them also based on those had had told her weeks ago. That little vixen! At first he thought he might actually blush but he was a grown man! It looked like she had been working on this notebook for some time, adding things every now and then. It ended with "If you keep me warm, loved, fed, high on caffeine and within arm's reach I'm not gonna have any complaints…" He really had to smile – she was one of a kind.

However he got back to the very first line in the notebook. The first thing that was written under the headline about her stay in DC was "You really upset me because you let me leave you…"

God he really missed her! And he really loved her.

He was glad that Anne was guarding the door. He just closed his eyes and rested there with the notebook in his hands. Suddenly DC and Nevada seemed to be light years away…

So what do you think? See ya with the promised sequel dealing with one certain thing from Fireworks? Huh? :o))