Story: ROFL Kingdom Hearts!
Notes: No plot line. Random updates. Enjoy!
MKL: Ah, Ararik--you have to love the freedom, ne?
Ararik: ...yes...but Sakuya disobayed you. Doesn't she need to be repremanded or something?
MKL: Hmmm, you have teh point...-suddenly smirks- Hey, did you know her cousin is coming to visit?
Ararik: -arches eyebrow- Which one?
MKL: -snickers- The one with the personality problem.
Ararik: ...oh no...please, no...anyone but her...
MKL: -smirks again- Y'know, maybe you're right. Sakuya DOES need to be punished. Now, are you ready, Ararik...?
Ararik: -sighs in slight releif- Just so long as she doesn't stay here, you can do whatever the bloody hell you want with her.
MKL: -laughs- Righto! Then let's get ready for her arrival, shall we? Okay, so when she first gets here...
( ) - ( ) - ( ) - ( )
Sakuya sneezed.
"Does Sakuya have a cold?" Namine asked, obviously a bit alarmed.
"I wish," Larxene grumbled, glowering at Axel. The redhead was scratching behind his ear with his back foot, apparently thinking he was a dog.
"Meow, meow, glub!" Axel announced, panting and grinning widely at Roxas. His blonde friend sighed deeply and shook his head.
"I think he beleives he's a drowning cat," Roxas muttered.
"Or worse--maybe he really thinks he's a dog," Demyx added, unable to resist the grin that pulled at his face.
"We need to take care of him until he's coherent," Zexion suddenly said, arms folded thoughtfully over his chest.
"Which should take about an hour and a half," Sakuya added in her body-language. Demyx gave her a slow blink to show he had heard.
"Screech!" Axel suddenly shouted, spreading his arms like wings and running around the room.
"...and now he thinks he's an eagle or something," Larxene muttered. She (and the rest of the room) looked like this:
-.-;;
"Sakuya!" a slightly bored voice called. Everyone whirled around just in time to see a Corridor of Darkness disappear into nothing, a teenage female stepping out at the last moment.
She was about the same height as Demyx, with long blue hair with golden highlights at the ends that slightly fell into her golden cat eyes. Sleek black cat ears stuck out where normal human ears should have been, twitching a bit as its owner glanced around the room, and a single black cat tail swayed back and forth behind her. She was wearing a black sleeveless top with a blue heart on it with the words "Kingdom Hearts Stole My Heart" over it in swirly red letters, a black mini skirt, red leggings, fingerless gloves, and killer black boots with blue swirls up the sides. Her lips were pouty and had dead purple lipstick over them, a katana-like sword with a red hilt was strapped to her hip, and she appeared slightly bored as she scanned the room.
"Sakuya, ya here?" she asked, glancing around. Her golden gaze fell on the group and she frowned, eyeing them suspiciously. "Hey. Any of you seen Sakuya? I'm kinda lookin' for her."
"Right there," Zexion offered quietly while everyone else simply stared (O.o;;). He gestured to his right and the teen nodded her thanks before following his wave, eyes flashing a bit when she saw the neko-goddess, who had begun to cower against the wall.
"Oh no," Sakuya moaned, making a sound that sounded like a cross between a hiss and a howl.
"Sakuya, you're in deep shit when you get home," the girl chastied. Sakuya flinched back, tails flying to curl under her legs as her ears flew to press against her skull.
"Uh...how much 'deep shit'?"
"Okay, maybe 'deep shit' isn't the right phrase." Just as Sakuya had begun to relax, the girl gave a sort of twisted half-smirk. "More like 'damned to the deepest pits of hell'."
Sakuya made the noise again and ran over, jumping on top of Axel's head (he had found a peice of the orange cushion Zexion had torn appart and was chewing it thoughtfully).
"Mmmm, candy," he half-cooed, searching around the room in an attempt to find more cushion.
"Luuuuuuuluuuuuuuu, please don't take me back," Sakuya howled, head just barely poking up above the spikey locks of Axel's hair. The teen (Lulu) frowned, gaze drifting to the side as she thought about it.
"Well, I'm gunna have ta stay and make sure you don't disobey orders any more for at least one chapter..." she mused, tapping her chin and ignoring the various looks she received.
"Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyy!!" Sakuya hopped out of Axel's hair and onto Lulu's shoulder, purring as she rubbed her side against the teen's cheek. "Lulu-chan, you're a lifesaver!!"
Lulu scowled and shoved her away, forcing Sakuya to jump back to Axel's shoulder to avoid being mauled over in her small form. "Get off of me," she half-snarled.
"Um, and you are...?" Roxas finally asked, eyebrow arched in suspicion. Lulu paused before slowly turning to look at him, an amused gleam appearing in her eye as Sakuya cooed encouragingly.
"Lulu." She half-sneered and folded her arms over her chest, slowly arching an eyebrow. "I'm workin' for Sakuya's boss right now 'cause Sakuya here's my cousin. Distant cousin, but still..."
"I see," Zexion muttered, eyeing her carefully. "That would explain the features..."
"Whoa, whoa, whoa--wait a minute," Larxene exclaimed, holding her arms up defensively. "I wanna explination. What the hell's going on?!"
"Sakuya came here on vacation," Lulu offered, rolling her eyes and looking vaguely annoyed at the idea. "Her boss found out that she caused some trouble, so I came to take her back...but..." Lulu sighed in defeat and turned to Sakuya, expression softening the tiniest bit. "Sakuya's my only cousin. I can't let her just take the heat without any fun, especially concidering she's probably gunna be grounded for a year when she gets back."
"Aaaaaah, I totally didn't think about that!" Sakuya wailed, covering her eyes with her ears and putting her front paws over them for emphasis. She ignored Axel when he glanced over at her and made the drowning cat noises before deciding a book would be fun to juggle (unsuccessfully). "I'm gunna diiiiiiiiiieee when MKL-sama gets a hold of me!"
"Damn right." Lulu nodded her emphasis, a smirk beginning to pull at her lips. "You're gunna die. Probably be sent to Fangirl Hell."
Sakuya perked up at that and grinned, abruptly standing up straight and launching herself at Demyx. She landed in his mullhawk, mewing joyfully. "That's where Auron lives!"
"Auron lives in the Underworld, Sakuya," Lulu said slowly, rolling her eyes as she let out a long-suffering sigh. "Just because MKL suggested ONE TIME that him being in Fangirl Hell was a likely idea of torture for his 'sins'..."
"Uh, if you don't mind me asking," Namine interupted quietly, causing Lulu to glance over at her with an arched eyebrow as Demyx grabbed Sakuya and cradled her to his chest, "did you say you were going to stay here?"
Lulu frowned, but nodded. "Yep."
"We're doomed," Larxene groaned, falling back into a chair. "She acts WAY too much like Zexion in one of his pissy-moods."
"Hey," Zexion objected, eyebrow twitching. Lulu suddenly froze up, then growled rather demonically.
"Was that an insult?" she growled, slowly flexing her fingers. Her fingernails (which had been normal before) suddenly became sharp claws, which looked like razors. A purr started low in her throat as Sakuya suddenly started to shake and whimper.
"Oh MKL-sama, we're all gunna die," she prayed.
"What?" Demyx asked dumbly. In response, Lola drew her sword and looked very, VERY murderous, pupils dialating rapidly.
Sakuya ignored him and began searching around her person. "Cat nip ball...c'mon, I know I have it!" She paused suddenly and grinned, jumping off of Demyx and landing on the floor before Lola. "Hey, Lola!"
The demon cat's eyes snapped to land on her and Sakuya pulled down her eyelid, sticking out her tongue. Lola's face darkened.
"You damn cat!" she howled despite the soft purr to her voice, launching into action on all fours like a wild animal. Sakuya suddenly pulled out a red ball of yarn and ballenced it on her head, causing Lola to suddenly freeze. Her expression brightened and her purring became louder as she threw her hand forward and shoved the yarn ball to the side. She continued to purr as she batted the ball back and forth before her, apprently satisfied.
"And that, ladies and gents, is how to fix a rampaging Lola and turn her back into a Lulu!" Sakuya announced brightly. She bowed dramatically. "Thank you, thank you, you're all a wonderful audience."
"Um, that's nice and all Sakuya, but we still have the problem of Axel over there," Demyx said, frowning deeply. Sakuya pouted and shook her head.
"Told ya already, Demyx, babe--can't. Gotta let it run its course, y'know?" she asked with a catty grin (pun intended). Demyx frowned.
"So what do we do with Axel while Little Miss Kitty over there plays with that ball of yarn?" Roxas asked dryly, gesturing to Lulu (who was still batting it back and forth).
"Humor him?" Demyx offered with a helpless shrug.
"Couldn't hurt," Zexion agreed with a nod. He suddenly smirked. "After all, it ultimately worked out for me, didn't it?"
"Eheheh, eheheh, ehhhh..." Larxene chuckled nervously, rubbing the back of her head. She was thoroughly ignored.
"Hey, I have an idea!" Roxas suddenly said. The others turned to him and he smirked rather darkly--an odd expression on even the vaguely-EMO Nobody. "Why don't we..."
He lowered his voice and a few moments passed as he relayed his plan, Sakuya snickering all the way.
( ) - ( ) - ( ) - ( )
"You sure they're not gunna kill him?" Larxene asked quietly as the group scuttled forward, Roxas holding a fishing pole with a peice of cheese dangling from it so he could lead a nearly-silent Axel.
"You're asking this now, when we're about to go through with it?" Demyx asked incredulously. He snickered. "Hey, even I--"
Deciding not to finish that sentence, he snapped his mouth shut, Sakuya (who was perched on his head) snickering as well.
"Ohhh, burn yourself, Demy?" she taunted. Demyx ignored her as they crept on, Lulu looking positively peeved. Sakuya had taken back her yarn ball (laced with cat nip, mind you) away shortly after they had begun to relay the plan.
"Why do I have to come along?" the humanoid neko hissed.
"Because you're the only one who can talk to Sakuya," Zexion whispered back, rolling his visible eye. Kingdom Hearts only knew what was under that wave of hair, after all, although a bionic eye or a hideous Phantom of the Opra scar was a pretty far-fetched (but not unheard of) guess.
'...I'm not even going to mentally respond to that,' Demyx decided with an angry mental sigh. Outwardly, he kept his normal smile in place.
"Hey, guys, we're getting closer," Namine quietly said, grinning stupidly. She had been the first suporter of the idea and was apparently not going to give up on it easily.
"We're all going to Fangirl Hell," Lulu muttered.
"Good, we can talk with Auron!" Sakuya said brightly. Lulu glared at her cousin, but didn't say anything, apparently trying to keep her anger in careful check. At least until she got bored, that is.
"We're here," Roxas muttered, haulting and grabbing the cheese miliseconds before Axel could. The redhead whimpered not unlike a cat (even Sakuya seemed impressed) and tried to grab it, but Roxas passed it to Lulu, who had sworn on Axel's life that she would keep it from him. Not that that was saying much, since it was Axel's life and not hers, but you take what you can get.
"They're going to kill him," Zexion said, voice too low for anyone but Demyx, Sakuya, and Lulu to hear.
"But it'll be fun to watch while it lasts," Lulu grudgingly admitted.
"Yep, yep!" Sakuya chirped with a bright grin.
"Okay, ready?" Namine asked quietly. Group nod from everyone but Axel, who was whimpering and trying to snag the cheese. "Set...go!"
Zexion quickly threw open the door and Lulu threw in the peice of cheese, Axel following and barking like a dog. They quickly slammed the door shut and leaned against it, listening intently to the voices inside.
"Number Eight...what are you doing here?" Saix asked in exasperation as Axel gnawed on a peice of cheese that had been thrown through the door. A sniff of the air had Saix's nose wrinkling as he made a slight 'coo'ing noise. "And who gave you caffine?"
"I gots cheese!" was Axel's giggling response.
"Heheh, seems someone wished to play a prank on Axel," Vexen snickered from nearby, leaning back in a chair with a rather superior smirk on his face.
"Or on us," Xemnas sighed, a hand lifted to cover half of his face in his exasperation. "Someone get him out of here."
"Vexy!" Axel suddenly shouted excitedly, lunging for the blonde. Vexen yelped and tried to get out of the way, but he was too slow--Axel had already tackled him and was snuggling against the elder man's stomach as said elder man turned a nice shade of red.
"E-Eight!" Vexen managed to exclaim, shoving at the redhead. It was all for Naught (lolz), since Axel hardly moved, instead snuggling closer. Vexen's attempts increased in force and speed. "Dammit, let go of me, Eight!"
Axel ignored him. "You smell like babies."
Vexen's face turned a deep shade of red as Saix snickered sadistically and a rather amused smirk crossed Xemnas's face. However, up in the control room, MKL huffed angrily.
"That's my line!" she complained. However, no one was around to hear her, so we'll return to the story now.
"Xemnas, please, get him OFF OF ME!!" the blonde wailed. Xemnas rolled his eyes, but rose to his feet with a sigh.
"Only because your crying is not fun to listen to," the Superior said blandly. He reached over and grabbed the back of Axel's shirt, ripping him away from Vexen (who sighed in releif as soon as he was free). Axel seemed unperterbed and grinned innocently up at Xemnas.
"Hey, Superior!" he chirped.
"Hello, Eight," Xemnas said smoothly, arching an eyebrow at him. "Who sent you here?"
Axel paused and put a finger to his chin thoughtfully, then laughed and shook his head. "The cheese!"
"Who was holding the cheese before it was thrown in here, Eight?"
Again Axel paused, but this time it was shorter and he grinned again, looking enlightened. "Lulu-Lola!" he announced, looking proud that he had managed to say that.
Silence.
"...and who is Lulu-Lola, Eight?" Xemnas finally asked. Axel's grin widened.
"Sakuya's cousin!" he announced brightly. The people outside of the door froze. "They're both neko-kitty-demons. Sakuya's a two-tailed kitty, and Lulu-Lola's a human with kitty ears and a tail!"
Xemnas slowly arched an eyebrow. "Oh really?"
"Yep!" Axel nodded his head for emphasis. He lowered his voice to a stage whisper. "But don't tell anyone--it's supposed ta be a secret!"
Xemnas, Vexen, and Saix exchanged identical looks. After a conversation consisting solely on facial expressions, Xemnas turned back to Axel nodding as he slowly set the man down. "Thank you for your help, Eight."
"Sure thing, Man--" Axel started to chirp. In a matter of moments, Saix had his arm around the redhead's mouth, gently holding his arms behind his back as Xemnas slowly started to turn red.
"It was an accident," he muttered rather distractedly, gazing out the window. "I didn't realize until afterward..."
"It's fine, Superior," Vexen assured the taller man, patting his back comfortingly. "We know."
"I will return him to his owners," Saix said dryly, walking towards the door with Axel clasped firmly in his grip. The redhead seemed ready to object before suddenly his eyes drooped.
"Sleepy-time," he yawned before going slack in Saix's arms. Satisfied, the blue-haired man lifted him and threw the uncontious Number VIII over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, opening the door and walking out. The group outside had scattered at "human with kitty ears", so Saix quickly picked out the unfamiliar scents and followed them down the hall.
This was going to be an...interesting...conversation...
( ) - ( ) - ( ) - ( )
"You signed their deathwish," Ararik said dryly. MKL smothered a smirk.
"I know," she said rather sadistically. Ararik rolled his eyes.
"Uh, M-K-L-sama," YK fidgeted as the other two turned to him, "ain't it time ta send in--"
"Not until Lulu leaves, YK," Ararik cut in with a roll of his eyes.
"Even if we wanted more than one OC in there right now, her owner hasn't contacted us," MKL sighed with a scowl, folding her arms over her chest. And after we took the time to put up that nice note, too!"
Ararik decided to cut in before his owner's thoughts turned violent. "Do you know if you did Lulu's character right? Or Lola's, for that matter?"
MKL waved his worrys away with a careless throw of her hand. "If Polish has a problem with it, well, anyone can contact me from my profile. Or through review."
"They're gunna die," YK suddenly said, glancing at the screen that had the outline for next chapter. MKL scowled.
"No they're not, silly!" A sadistic grin spread over her face. "'Sides, if I killed off anybody TOO important, the whole KH:CoM and KH2 thing would never happen, would it?"
"You're going to Fangirl Hell for this," Ararik said dryly. MKL scowled again, but her eyes glinted mischeiviously.
"Okay, ArarikA."
Ararik paled. "P-please don't reference that in here, MKL-sama."
"Hehehe," MKL snickered, smirking mischeiviously and leaning back in her chair. "Dunno. Sakuya might mention it to Saix..."
Ararik whimpered rather pathetically.
MKL snickered before turning to YK. "Anyway, Youko Kyuubi, will you please do the honors?"
"Sure thing, M-K-L-sama!" he announced with a grin. He turned to the readers. "Y'all should review! We're open ta more suggestions, too! Just try ta hold off on th' nekos, please an' thanks. Maybe send 'n a 5-tailed wolf demon..."
"That's my job!" Ararik squawked. He was ignored, even as he groaned, smothering his face with his hand. "Please no one do that, please no one do that, then I'd have to be with them...oh Xelloss, I'm gunna die..."
"Speaking of Slayers..." MKL said with a grin.
(Everyone review, please! Thankies! Hope you guys don't need an arrow this time...actually, YK's gunna draw one! -grins- See ya later! MKL, signing out.)
YK's arrow to review button!:
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