Apologies for the late update—I totally forgot about this fic for a while haha ^^" Enjoy! Oh, btw, I suggest reading in 3/4 format, easier on the eyes I reckon.

This more-or-less final chapter goes to yui33aki, my second reviewer, and lynixe, who also took time to review. Thanks guy :')

The Futile Attempts...

"Juudaime, look!" Gokudera beamed as he spun around in the new clothes he had bought with the one and only mother of the 10th Generation Boss of the Vongola Family. "They're new! And they feel sooo soft~!" He started to laugh in a way that could only been deemed as insane.

Gokudera had, actually, become insane. That was the most favored hypothesis. Reborn did say that he had been doing the work of about 10 people for the Vongola family without complaint, but the stress—in the forms of Bianchi and others—must have built up somewhere and damaged very important parts of his cerebral cortex involving personality. This was proven by his extremely terrifying out-of-character-ness as well as the evil, unrestrained cackle he was giving off now.

And now Tsuna is wondering why he was with Yamamoto, Reborn and his mum shopping (more like standing around while Tsuna's mum dragged around Gokudera and made him try on clothes) when he should be home not scared shitless. It was weird to say, but boy, did he miss the old Gokudera. Yes, the Gokudera who blew up things on random, half-killed living things which were labeled as a threat ― half-killed things which weren't even living ― and scared kids.

Tsuna sighed. That determination before really was as useless as he was 5 years ago.

"Gokudera-kun, so cute~!" cooned Nana while Yamamoto―yes, Yamamoto― nodded in agreement at the next outfit which they made Gokudera try on. Oh look, it was a Pokemon shirt this time. Who would have guessed.

"Okaa-san, we shouldn't be doing this to Gokudera-kun when he's in this unstable condition―" started Tsuna only to be cut off.

"Maa, maa, just leave it be; I'm sure he'll return to normal eventually," smiled Yamamoto reassuringly. As if. Yamamoto looked like Christmas came early when Gokudera was in that state. Tsuna could only imagine the sort of things Yamamoto would make Gokudera do (and no, don't think too far ahead, 8059 fans) when he was like this. It was fortunate the silver-head did not stay with Yamamoto during this crisis.

Wait.

"Reborn," Tsuna suddenly spoke up, "Actually, where is Gokudera-kun staying?" The landlord of the place Gokudera lived in was gone for holiday for the week, and so they had no normal means of getting into his house without a spare key.

Reborn, sitting on the boys shoulder, said one name he wished he did not hear.

"Yamamoto, of course; maman is already taking care of so many people, and Yamamoto was willing."

'Oh yeah, willing to bed with Gokudera-kun by the looks of it,' thought Tsuna darkly. Then he shook his head vigorously, cringing; by the looks of things, and how Gokudera was so screwed up in the head, that situation might actually happe―

'NO! Don't think about it!' cried Tsuna's mind in anguish, hands gripping his head. 'Better just to keep following them and prevent anything too disastrous happening...anyway, I'm probably over thinking when it comes to Yamamoto...' He looked up and let out a strangled sort of gasp.

Gokudera was feeding Yamamoto what appeared to be caramelized popcorn.

'When did-!'

"Hai, Tsu-kun; here's yours," came his mothers voice from behind him. He turned around and stared at the small package of candy popcorn that was placed in his hand. Then he stared at Yamamoto, who was smiling fondly down at Gokudera. Then at Gokudera, still feeding Yamamoto like it was the greatest joy in the world.

He promptly declined the popcorn.

:.

"Wahh! It's weird to admit, but Gokudera-san is cute!" breathed Haru almost in awe as she stared at Gokudera sporting his new clothes (which, if the normal Gokudera saw, would be promptly reduced to nothingness by some conveniently placed C4). She had dropped by with German sachetorte only to stumble across the unearthly sight of Gokudera.

"Isn't he?" gushed Nana. Gokudera practically became a new son to the housewife; it was something else to have a son who was actually capable at school work and sports, explosive-obsessed tendencies aside. Tsuna was lying down on the couch, exhausted to the bone marrow. With a very good reason too.

They had bumped into 4 different individuals along their way in the town. One was Longchamp who, with his never-ending energy, introduced them to his new girlfriend who was the size of a baby whale and had dragged Gokudera around the town to introduce him to a girlfriend. Out of concern for the messed-up Italian's welfare, Tsuna and Yamamoto sprinted after the disappearing pair and rescued him just in time from the clutches of a thing which was supposedly female, but possessed the revolting body of a male body builder and teeth like a shark. Yamamoto had to hush Gokudera from his stricken state (he had been shocked into trauma—an expression that made him look like the normal Gokudera) and had lent his shoulder to support (drag) Gokudera back to the Sawada mother.

And then there was Ryohei and Kyoko, Kyoko instantly commenting on Gokudera's change of style and gave them all lollipops which she had just bought. Ryohei exclaimed that the threesome didn't need candy like that ("for we are men!") and had taken away the candy. It was the wrong move, for Gokudera, with his face looking as though he was younger by 10 years, started to sniffle, face crumpling. At the sight of Gokudera's newly-formed tears, Ryohei had been taken-aback and had apologized profusely without quite knowing why.

"I feel like I just picked on somebody weaker than me—like some small animal," he had muttered, utterly disturbed by the unresisting Gokudera who would have picked a fight with him already and possibly blown him to smithereens.

"I don't know what he ate, but I'll leave it to you, Sawada."

Tsuna felt the weight of another person's hope on his shoulders.

And lastly there was Hibari. Gokudera almost got bitten to death after he had casually stated that Hibari, yes, that Hibari, was gorgeous. Reborn had to convince Hibari that picking on someone as pathetic as Gokudera was at the moment was going to ruin his image. Hibari left without a word, and Gokudera lived to see another day, even if his dignity had all but shattered.

But of course, in all hopeless-looking situations, there comes a spark of hope, even if it was deadly―like, Poison deadly.

Yes, well spotted.

:.

"Hayato!"

The door slammed open, revealing a harassed-looking Bianchi. Her eyes, hidden behind her yellow goggles, scanned frantically for her brother and she spotted him...

...with Yamamoto, who was too damn close to her cute little brother for her liking.

Yamamoto's athletic senses sparked as he felt the need to use his super-human reflexes.

Reborn's finger hovered over the speed-dial for Emergencies just in case.

I-pin and the rest evacuated.

"YAMAMOTO TAKESHI, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING TO MY BROTHER?"

Her shriek echoed like a cannon blast.

"Ah, uh―" Yamamoto frantically waved around a hand, looking incredibly nervous (and guilty, by the way) as he tried find a way to calm the raging assassin, and Bianchi took the time to ready some of her treacherous cooking.

"GIVE ME BACK HAYATO!"

"Uh, Tsuna!" Yamamoto sent SOS signals to Tsuna, who put on his 27 gloves in case a battle royale started. When Gokudera shifted, Bianchi's eyes fell upon his Pokemon shirt and shorts with a raised eyebrow; what the hell was her brother wearing?

It was obvious some blood needed to be spilled. Bianchi rounded on Yamamoto.

"You damned...sicko," she seethed, eyes clouded with fury, "Making my Hayato dress like that when he didn't even dress like that when he was 3!" Yamamoto gulped and protectively shielded Gokudera, who blinked as he squinted at Bianchi.

"Now, come and die now―" She advanced menacingly.

"Onee-san!"

Everyone felt like they were electrocuted to silence. Bianchi stared at her brother, her mouth slightly agape as he wore his nowadays-trademark beam, as though he loved everything and detested violence. He stood up. "Onee-san, I've missed you!"

With his newly-acquired cuteness, the softened eyes and smoother voice from the absence of rough swear words and cigarettes, Gokudera Hayato could win over even his sister with the kiddish, innocent smile he wore right now.

Suddenly, Bianchi dropped her Poison Cooking onto the ground and walked over to Gokudera slowly, bangs shadowing her eyes from view. Everyone flinched, waiting in baited silence. Then...

"I don't like the fact Yamamoto Takeshi was playing around with Hayato...but..." She suddenly hugged her brother close to her chest with a blush present on her face. "I'll forgive it because my brother is so cute right now! He has never said he missed me before!" she said in a voice she usually reserved for doting on Reborn, rubbing cheeks with Gokudera while he merely smiled happily. Let's erase the fact he was about a foot taller than her now.

'There's a really good reason for why he never missed you. -.-'' thought Tsuna from a little way away.

Reborn smiled; yes, the unity of the Family was indeed deepening. Yosh.

"Amazing, even Bianchi-san..." whispered Haru in awe, who had just returned and was peering around the door. Yamamoto just breathed a sigh of relief, smiling at the two siblings who were closer than they ever were in their entire life.

"But tell me, Reborn," Bianchi said, eyed turning suddenly hawk-like as she glared at Yamamoto, shifting her goggles up on top of her head, "What exactly happened?"

Tsuna stared at her, dumbfounded. 'You happened, that's what! It's your fault he became like this!'

Gokudera turned and stared Bianchi straight in the face. He jerked once, almost imperceptibly. Then, coincidently (or maybe not so), blood leaked from the side of his mouth in a slow dribble.

There was a still silence.

Reborn gave a small smile which resembled a smirk. "Let's go have some tea first, how about it?"

Hope had just come…even if in the form of internal bleeding.

:.

"I see..." murmured Bianchi, sitting at the dining table with a look of wonder. Reborn, on her immediate right, merely nodded.

"Un."

Tsuna merely sat there, drinking a cup of coffee.

Gokudera sat on the floor a little way away, learning how to fold paper flowers. Yamamoto tucked one in Gokudera's hair and gave his win-any-girl smile. Gokudera let out a very un-Gokudera-ish smile in return, latching himself to Yamamoto affectionately.

The coffee promptly flew out of Tsuna's mouth.

"Wow, he has really changed," commented Reborn casually as Tsuna's cheek hit the table lifelessly into the pool of spilt coffee.

"Indeed...but that Yamamoto Takeshi better not do anything to my Hayato."

"..." (- this is Tsuna, brain dead).

"I guess even if Hayato is adorable right now, he has to change back," sighed Bianchi, resting her cheek on her hand, goggles once again clad over her eyes. "Though I wouldn't mind him like this every once in a while."

"Though maybe not to this extreme."

"Indeed."

"..."

Reborn sighed.

"We'll just have to hope that tomorrow he's back to normal. Bianchi, you and Gokudera should stay here for the night; maybe some more interaction with you might jolt him out of his state." Reborn rounded on Tsuna. "You tell maman about the situation."

Tsuna blew lifeless bubbles into the coffee in response.

:.

The Next Day

The most horrifying nerve-racking, blood-chilling scream rang out through the street where the Sawada household resided.

A male's voice.

"WHAT THE F-! YOU FREAKIN' BASEBALL IDIOT!"

Everyone in the house bolted upright from their sleeping positions, except for Yamamoto, who merely rubbed his eyes tiredly. "Hm, what's the ruckus―" He was punched about a meter away and was sprawled on the ground, once again unconscious.

Tsuna, Reborn, Nana, I-pin, Bianchi and Dino came rushing out to the lounge. "Yamamoto, what's wron―Gokudera-kun?" Tsuna's eyes shifted to an unconscious Yamamoto's form. "Y-Yamamoto?"

Gokudera was sitting upright inside a fuuton...the same fuuton he found Yamamoto practically sprawled in from his own fuuton, hugging him nonetheless. He glared daggers into the wall before him before he roared:

"WHAT THE F(CENSORED) IS GOING ON AROUND HERE?"

Dynamite was already clutched between angrily trembling fingers.

Tsuna practically cried in relief in response.

A/N: Almost-the-end?

It ended pretty abruptly, but then again this was just a crack/humour fic I wrote on whim years and years ago.

I decided to type up an omake/extra/epilogue-ish short of thing to close the whole crack!fic down. Stick around for it soon!

And if you want an insight on what to expect, it will involve a bit of the aftermath, and strangely enough, Mukuro and co. Lol.

Thanks for reading! Cheers!