Warnings: Yip you guessed it mature explicit male/male sexual content and strong language. There is also a bit about non-consensual sex but nothing graphic.

A/N Ok this chapter was never in my outline I have added it because of a few questions and comments I have received...so anyway it is a bit slow (although it does pick up a little at the end ;-) ) but may help explain something that I didn't make very clear in the previous chapters. I have put more on this at the bottom once you have read it LH x

(PS. Please review! It's only your reviews that are keeping me going at the moment and they also let me know what you guys want ;-))

Chapter 16 - Coming Home

"Him that has control of departure, that has control of coming home, return, and turning in, that shepherd do I also call." -Atharva Veda

The journey home on the Hogwarts Express usually passed too quickly for Harry but this year it seemed to take forever. He had been stuck in a carriage with only Ron for most of it and was fed up listening to him blether on about Lavender. Hermione had disappeared on the pretence of going to the bathroom but hadn't returned, she was obviously hurting about the way Ron incessantly talked about his girlfriend and Harry wished he could go and join her.

Harry was not all that bothered about spending time at the Dursleys this year since he knew it would be his last Christmas there and if he was honest he would rather stay with them for the whole holiday than go to the Burrow. He would only be putting his friends at risk again if Severus couldn't foil the plan of the Death Eater attack.

"The Unbreakable Vow, are you sure that's what Snape said?" Ron asked snapping Harry out of his half listening state.

"Positive. Why?" Harry responded but wasn't sure he really wanted to get into this again at the moment.

"Well you can't break an Unbreakable Vow" Ron replied looking a bit confused.

"I'd worked that out for myself funnily enough"

"I can't understand..." Ron began looking even more confused.

Merlin Harry thought he really had to get away from Ron for a bit, he couldn't believe how incredibly thick his friend was at times.

Lavender appeared at the glass door of their carriage and proceeded to draw love hearts and nonsense on the door. Harry looked away at the sickeningly sweet display of affection from the girl and was relieved he was gay, at least he would never have to put up with crap like that from Sev.

Once Lavender left, Ron started talking about snogging again and Harry was about to scream, so decided to get back onto the topic of the Unbreakable Vow, it was preferable to hearing more about chapped lips and the likes.

"So what happens to you, what happens if you break an Unbreakable Vow" Harry heard himself asking and expected more inane drivel out of his friends mouth about how you couldn't break an Unbreakable Vow, that was why it was called Unbreakable, that it would make you see it through.

"You die" Ron said with a sigh

Harry gripped his potions text book which he had been in his hand since leaving Hogwarts tighter and rubbed his thumb over the spine. He looked away from Ron at the Love heart on the door and wished that he had let his friend carry on with his talk of snogging. He was struggling to reign in his emotions; his anxiety for Severus soared in his mind, heart and soul.

"Look Ron there is only ½ an hour left before we arrive at Kings Cross I am going to go find Hermione. I will see you at the Burrow in a few days so want to say goodbye to her and wish her a Merry Christmas. Alright mate?"

Harry darted out the carriage before Ron had a chance to answer and slipped into the toilet cubicle, he thought he might vomit as his heart raced and his head spun. The thought that Severus cared enough about Malfoy to protect him with his life hit him hard. He hoped it was some duty Severus had taken on as Dumbledore's spy but that went against the emotions he had felt from the man when speaking to the other Slytherin. His anxiety and fear for Severus's life reached an all time high and he thought he was going to pass out. He sat down hard on the lid of the toilet with his head between his knees trying to breathe slowly. He had had a panic attack before and his rational brain told him this was what was happening now but it didn't make it any less scary. He sat there for quite a while holding onto the Half Blood Princes textbook and felt a wave of love tingle through his fingers which ran up his arms and calmed his pounding heart. There was a loud knock at the door just as he was managing to calm down a bit and Harry startled.

"Just a minute" he called out gathering himself together.

"Harry? It's me. Hermione. Let me in"

Harry flicked the door open and Hermione squeezed herself into the small room.

"Are you alright you look dreadful!"

"I'm fine 'mione. How did you know I was in here?

"I came back to your carriage to wish you a Merry Christmas since I probably won't be at the Burrow this year. Ron told me you had gone looking for me 10 minutes ago. Dean said he had seen you run in here. Are you sick?" Hermione said worriedly feeling his forehead.

"Panic attack. Why didn't you tell me that you die if you break an Unbreakable Vow 'mione? "

"Ah" Hermione replied a bit shamed facedly.

"So you knew and you didn't tell me?" Harry asked incredulously.

"Harry I'm sorry but it's not like it's someone you don't care about that you think that has made an Unbreakable Vow, is it? You were so upset about it; I just didn't think last night was the right time to mention it, we had a lot of other things to talk about"

Harry sighed and gripped the potions book again as his heart gave a worrying skip.

"I had hoped I would get a chance to tell you on the journey home but I just couldn't stand being with Ron."

"I know, but I think he is maybe getting a bit sick of Lavender 'mione so keep your chin up alright" Harry said with a weak smile.

"Well I'm not sure I'm that bothered about him now anyway" Hermione huffed but she clearly was.

"Anyway how did you get on with Professor Snape before we left? I haven't had a chance to speak with you alone"

"Yeah it was fine. I told him I couldn't trust him yet and he said he loved me. We kissed. It was a bit awkward really, I felt so tense with him but it helped I guess. I can feel him again. In here." Harry said pointing to his head.

"I'm glad Harry. The holiday is going to be difficult being separated again from him you need to try not focus on what happened the night of the party or you are going to work yourself into a worse state than you were before and maybe do something regrettable when we return. Listen, take this." Hermione rummaged in her bag and pulled out a book Harry recognised from the Room of Requirement.

"I have made some notes in the margins. There are some suggestions to minimise the risk of you becoming too distressed whilst separated alright"

"Thanks 'Mione" Harry took the book and gave his friend a hug.

"We better go, we must be about to arrive. You go out first I will follow in a few minutes. We could do without rumours about you and me, in the bloody boy's toilet on the train!"

Harry disembarked the train shortly after leaving the toilet feeling fairly calm but after he had gone through the barrier at platform 9 3/4 his heart skipped a beat again. The last person he needed to see right now was standing off to the side, apparently waiting on Harry. Hermione looked worriedly at Harry's expression.

"Are you sure you are alright Harry? Look, there's your uncle's business associate. I thought you liked it when he came to get you, you might not have to even see you family this holiday if they have sent him" Hermione said cheerily, she thought the man who was now walking toward them was sent to collect Harry if the Dursleys were away on holiday.

"Emm yeah sorry just a little surprised at seeing him here this time." Harry tried to smile but his heart was beating hard.

Stephen was a young man who had been under his Uncles thumb as his apprentice ever since leaving school but he had matured over his first year of working for him into a very strong character once he got his own house and moved away from the smothering love his mother had bestowed on him. Harry hadn't seen him in almost a year and he had thought that maybe he had managed to get another job away from his bullying Uncle but here he was, as large as life, walking toward him with a beaming smile.

"Harry! How nice to see you again" the tall man said, as he put his arm around Harry's shoulder pulling him into his side in a one armed hug. "Nice to see you have grown a little since the last time I saw you, squirt"

Harry flinched at the man's use of the nickname he had for him and pulled away from the embrace.

"Yeah well it has been almost year Stephen. I am no longer a child" Harry said sarcastically.

Stephen grimaced a little but kept on smiling "So I see" he responded raising his eyebrows and looking him up and down.

Hermione had become a bit alarmed by the exchange "Harry are you alright I am sure you can go directly to the Burrow if your family are not home"

"His family will return soon, your friend will be just fine" Stephen beamed extending his hand toward Hermione who took it gingerly.

"Nice to meet you again, Hermione wasn't it?"

Hermione ignored Stephen's smiling blue eyes that were now staring at her with warmth and looked back at Harry questioningly.

"There is no need to change plans. Was just a little surprised like I said" but Harry's eyes told her a different story but she resigned herself to having to let Harry go.

"Alright, I will see you in a three weeks, hope you have a good Christmas" Hermione let go of her trunk and flung her arms around her friend again in a tight hug and whispered in his ear.

"Owl me Harry, about anything you need to talk about alright? Anything at all"

Harry nodded once his clearly concerned friend let him go and turned to Stephen who again put his arm around his shoulders and lead him out to his waiting car.

Once in the car Stephen turned and placed his hand on Harry's leg.

"I have missed you Squirt. It's been too long"

"Please don't call me Squirt alright. I am no longer a child that thinks the nickname is cute"

"Harry what is wrong?" Stephen said with genuine sounding concern in his voice.

"I have grown up over the last year Stephen, I was only 14 when I was first sent to you, I was a child and what you did to me was wrong"

There was an uncomfortable silence in the car and Stephen turned away and started driving through the busy London traffic.

"I know Harry and I am truly sorry. It should never have happened. There is no excuse. I thought I had made it all ok after that first time and you seemed to want me too. I always thought you were happy coming over to my house".

Harry sighed "I thought I did want you in a way, you were kind and gentle with me, well after that first time, but looking back on it now I didn't really didn't want what we did, I just accepted that I could give you something you needed which in turn paid my Uncle for having me around which made my life easier when I was home. You must have known that Stephen. Did I ever once initiate anything with you? Did I ever give you an indication I truly wanted to have sex with you?"

"I paid for you to clean my house Harry, not to have sex with me" Stephen said quietly.

"I know that but if I had just cleaned your house would you have kept paying for me to come every week?" Harry said through gritted teeth.

"Yes I would have. I know how much that money meant to you and you got treated a little better by your family because of it. I did care for you."

"You knew how desperate I was to keep my Uncle from beating me, yet you still made me have sex with you, for over a year?" Harry was getting angry now.

"I really didn't think I made you do anything Harry. I know you were only 14 but I was only 18 when I first met you and I always thought you were so much smarter and older than me in every other way. I really am sorry. I honestly thought you enjoyed it." Stephen said genuine distress clear in his voice.

Harry's anger dissipated a little. He knew Stephen had been younger and very immature due to his cosseted upbringing when he was 18 than Harry had been at 14, but it still did not entirely excuse what had happened.

Harry had been sent round to Stephens flat when he had first bought it; his Uncle had offered Harry's services of cleaning and general dog's body for a weekly fee. Stephen had first agreed since Vernon had really not given him any option and had taken the fee directly out his wage packet. The first time Harry had gone to the house; Stephen had been drinking and was a bit worse for wear. He had offered Harry some whisky, which he had drunk out of politeness, and although he only had 3 or 4 small measures from the bottle, it had made him fairly drunk, having never really had alcohol before. They ended up watching a film on the TV, sprawled out on the sofa together and Harry had begun to feel relaxed with the stranger. However Stephen had suddenly kissed him and although Harry was shocked, he didn't fight him off. It had been fairly pleasant to be held by someone after the year he had had at school with Cedric dying and everything, but Stephen had become a bit wild and had taken things too far, not stopping when Harry had begged him to do so. Afterwards Stephen had been full of apologises and had cried at what he had done. The following few weeks Harry did just clean his flat and Stephen had apologised profusely every week. Then a one week, as Harry was leaving, Stephen had pulled him into a tight embrace and kissed him . Harry didn't object, he had actually grown to quite like the man over those weeks, in spite of what had happened. It was clear that Stephen wanted more from Harry than just a clean flat and he resigned himself to giving him what he wanted. He would never offer it or initiate anything but he didn't fight it either. Stephen had been very gentle and caring with him and never once force him or did anything Harry objected to but Harry had remained a very passive partner, only allowing things to be done to him. He blocked his mind to what they did but the fact was, Stephen was right, he had physically ended up enjoying it but it made him feel sick, used, and dirty, his pleasure only making him feel worse.

"Well I can't really deny that I physically enjoyed it Stephen, can I? But in my head...in here it made me feel like shit" Harry said quietly tapping his hand over his heart.

Stephen drove the rest of the way to Privet Drive in an uncomfortable silence. Once they arrived Stephen quickly made some dinner and Harry sat at the dining room table as he served it.

"Can we start again Harry? You are 16 now and can do what you want, in fact why are you even still coming here? You could move out and get your own place you know."

"I don't have the rights yet in the Wizarding world, I am still termed a child there." Harry replied ignoring the question about starting again.

"Well you are adult here in the normal world and I am serious, I do care about you. I want us to start again you know be together properly this time."

"No Stephen, I am bon...I have met someone else. I can't be with you. It would never work anyway, you and I, there is too much damage, too much that bad history between us" Harry had grown quieter as he spoke as he realised his words could equally be applied to him and Severus's relationship and that thought made him sad.

Stephen got up and came over to where Harry was sitting, pushing the food that Harry had playing with aside he sat on the edge of the table and pulled Harry to his feet.

"Please Harry just one last time for old time sake then" Stephen gripped him hard and tried to kiss him. Harry started to struggle, panic and fear rising in his chest. He tried to reach his wand which was still in his jeans pocket but was pushed harshly backward onto the table. Stephen was on him like a man possessed begging him and pleading for him to let him make him feel good one last time.

Harry had just managed to pull out his wand when he heard a loud crack and Stephen was flung across the room.

Harry jumped up off the table wondering if he had let go of a burst of uncontrolled magic again and looked over to where Stephen had landed. Standing over the slumped form, wand drawn was a very pissed off Severus Snape.

Oh shit Harry thought but his heart flipped over seeing his soul mate here.

"Severus! I'm alright. Lower your wand" Harry pleaded not wanting Sev to kill the quivering man at his feet. He hated that the man had tried to take him again against his will but he didn't want him dead.

"Who... is...this?" Severus said slowly through gritted teeth, not taking his eyes of the young man on the floor who was now whimpering.

"It doesn't matter who he is Sev, please, he is not worth it. I am fine"

"You did not look like you were fine when I arrived" Severus stated his wand hand starting to shake in rage.

"Well no but I could have handled it myself. Please just let him go" Harry had approached Sev from behind and gently reached out to his wand hand, gripping it and gently pushing it away from Stephens neck.

"Just go Stephen, Leave. Now." Harry demanded.

Stephen got to his feet quickly, not taking his eyes of Severus's wand and fled, slamming the door as he left.

Severus turned and faced Harry once they heard the car outside speed away.

Harry launched himself into Sev's arms and started to cry as the adrenaline pumping through his system abated, the realisation of what had just about happened to him again, slammed into him.

Severus held him tight and ran his hand over his hair in soothing motions.

"Shhh you are alright. You are safe. It's over. I will never let anyone harm you again." Severus said in a low whisper.

Once Harry calmed sufficiently to talk, he spoke into Severus neck not wanting to break the physical contact just yet.

"Why are you here Sev? How did you know I was not safe?"

"I felt you fear and disgust Harry and after what I found out the other day I came to make sure nothing like that was happening again."

Harry nodded and raised his head to look into those dark eyes. The emotion in those eyes combined with the love coming through the bond, almost made Harry's knee buckle under the power of it.

"Thank you" he breathed out as he leant in to kiss Severus's slightly parted lips.

When Harry broke the kiss he pulled Severus through to the sitting room.

"You will have to stay you know. My family are away on holiday so it won't be safe here for me until they return." Harry smiled trying to sound cheery and push away what had just transpired as if it was nothing.

Severus nodded and smiled a little

"Who was that man Harry?"

"Emm well he is someone that works for my Uncle, he well... mmm...paid my Uncle...

"WHAT! Your Uncle hired you out for..."

"No Sev it wasn't like that. Well it was kind of. My Uncle doesn't know that was what he used me for. He paid my Uncle for me to clean his house and I kind of well...let it happen because the money he paid allowed me to eat sometimes and the beatings had mostly stopped."

Severus eyes grew wild and he growled as he stood and started pacing the floor. How could have he not seen there was something wrong every time Harry had returned to Hogwarts from this place. Looking back now the signs were all there; his emaciated frame, his pale drawn face, the oversized used clothes.

"Sev please calm down I am fine alright. Please, I need to move on from it. I don't want to even talk about it. It's over." Harry pleaded.

Severus looked at Harry with an indiscernible emotion in his eyes and wrapped his cloak around the smaller frame.

"I am so sorry Harry. I am so so sorry"

"It wasn't your fault Sev" Harry said relaxing into the man's arms again, feeling safe and at peace.

"Oh but it was" Severus whispered inaudibly. The innocent trusting green eyes of an infant flashed his mind as he handed him over to Albus. Handed him over to years of abuse he now knew.

Harry pulled away from Sev a few moments later.

"Would you like something to eat or drink? You are going to stay aren't you?"

"Of course I am staying until that family of yours returns, but I don't think I could eat right now, you go ahead" Severus seemed distant to Harry, he knew the man was deep in thought and wanted Harry to tell him more about what he had just found out but he really couldn't talk about any of it.

"I'm not hungry either. I will get us a drink though. Do you like muggle brandy or there is whisky but I am not so keen on that." Harry asked trying to sound relaxed as he looked through his Uncles drinks cabinet.

"Mhmmm? Brandy would be fine" Severus answered still lost in his thoughts.

Sitting down with two large glasses of brandy a moment later, Harry held one out to Sev and motioned for him to join him on the flowery sofa.

"Can we just try and relax and not talk about anything serious tonight Sev. Please?" Harry still wanted to know about why his soul mate was helping Malfoy. He was sure Malfoy was up to something as a Death Eater and he still couldn't reconcile the feelings from Sev toward the boy with the idea that Sev was only acting on Dumbledore's orders. He had owled Mr. Weasley about his fears and to inform his that the Headmaster seemed to be travelling but hadn't had a response yet.

"So what do you want to do Sev? Fancy watching a film or something?"Pushing the disturbing thought from his mind again as he asked.

Sev sighed and broke out his thoughts.

"A film? Ah the mindless, violence, horror or romance that muggles seem to think is entertaining, doesn't really interest me Harry." Severus said scowling a bit

"Yeah I suppose it seems all a bit tame to our real life dramas doesn't it" Harry said laughing.

Severus snorted "Well if they made a film about your life I am not sure what they would call it. An unrealistic, teen fantasy, horror, drama!"

"Yours wouldn't be much better." Harry huffed

"Mine would be more on the horror side I fear" Severus said sadly.

"Oh I don't know we must have some romance in there too" Harry suggested sideling up to Sev's side.

Severus chortled lightly "Romantic? Me? Ha! Maybe in your dreams" Severus rolled his eyes.

"Well I am glad you are not all mushy anyway. Merlin you should have seen what I had to put up with from Ron and Lavender on the trip home, it was seriously disturbing. If that is romance, then I want none f it!"

Severus had turned to Harry as they spoke, putting his drink down, he captured the grimacing face in his hands and gently kissed him. It didn't take long until their joint desire of each other melded into one and they found themselves writhing together frantically trying to shed each other's clothes in a shared need for closeness.

Once completely naked they paused looking at each other with such a mix of confusing emotions emanating from each of them it took their breaths away.

"Harry you don't have to do this you know. I do want you but I can feel you still don't trust me. I know it's a lot to ask without giving you any explanations but I need you to feel completely sure that you still want me like this"

"I want you too, and I do want to trust you, just give me time alright but tonight I need you like this"

Harry pulled Severus down slowly on top of him and their bodies met in a tingling desire. Shivers shot up and down Harry's spine as Severus nibbled and sucked on his ear. Their joint arousal growing as they rubbed against each other.

Harry shifted under Severus and pushed him up slightly allowing him to move into a seated position. Severus knelt still between Harry legs. Harry reached forward and wrapped his hand around Severus's cock and looked at the man questioningly as he brought his face down toward the weeping member. Severus sighed and closed his eyes, relaxing back. Harry slowly pumped the hard cock in his hand, slowly running his thumb over the head and round the sensitive gland on each up stroke. Sev groaned in pleasure, thrusting slightly into the gentle fist surrounding him. Flicking his tongue out quickly, Harry tasted Sev's slightly bitter essence and smiled at the completely relaxed look Sev gave him. Leaning back down he sucked the head of his lovers cock into his mouth, running his tongue gently over the slit again and around the ridge as he did so.

Sev gasped as his hip involuntarily thrust deeper into the warm wet cavern, Harry kept his hand around the base of the now throbbing cock to stop Sev thrusting too far, he had never done this before and didn't want to ruin it by gagging. He placed his other under Sev's tight balls and squeezed gently before reaching further back and pressing and rubbing the perineum area stimulating the prostrate externally.

Severus let out a loud groan which spurred Harry on who quickened his pace and sucked and licked in time to his lover's thrusts and groans, only pausing for a second a few minutes later to reposition himself closer to his mate but continued to pump him with his hand as he did so. Quickly licking the fingers of his other hand before once again bringing his had back down. He ran his tongue over Sev's balls and nuzzled into the thick black hair at the base of his cock breathing in his scent deeply before running his tongue up the tight skin back to the swollen head and plunging it back into his mouth as far as he could manage. The other hand carefully resumed kneading at the prostrate externally before pushing one wet finger gently into Severus tight entrance. Severus stilled his hips and grabbed Harry's hair gently making Harry open his eyes and look up at Sev questioningly. He hoped he hadn't upset him or taken things somewhere Sev wasn't ready for. As their eyes met, the initial look of shock he saw in Sev's eyes melted away to be replaced with amazement and hunger, before nodding slightly with a groan and closing his eyes again.

Severus had been completely lost in the sensations that were ripping through his body. Harry's touch was gentle and unsure, almost painfully so, but when he had picked up pace and breached his entrance with a gentle probing finger he had been a little shocked. He had never been taken by another man in a very long time, it held memories of one of the most difficult times of his life when he believed he deserved to be used, but as he saw and felt the loving questioning in Harry's eyes, he knew this was nothing like anything he had ever experienced. Harry was not using him, he just wanted to give him pleasure and was taking pleasure doing so. At this realisation he let go of a lot of past pain and relaxed in to the touch of his soul mate, with more abandon than he thought he was capable of. Harry pushed a second, then a third finger gently into him and Severus almost screamed as he brushed over his most sensitive spot. He gripped Harry's hair a little harder as he bobbed up and down faster and harder on his cock.

"Fuck Harry... I am... " he managed to growl out as he pulled at Harry's hair trying to give him the message he was about to come but Harry only sucked and increased his pressure and pace, both with his mouth and the probing fingers.

Every muscle in Severus's body tensed just before the release crashed over him in strong waves as he emptied himself into Harry's mouth with a growling scream. Harry continued milking him until the tension had eased and Severus flopped back onto the sofa a quivering mess. He looked over at Harry who wore a dopey grin and snorted out a incredulous laugh

"Merlin Harry you seriously will be the death of me" He panted.

Harry crawled over him and lay quietly covering his body with his own. Severus, becoming aware that Harry's own need was now pressing into his thigh, lifted the tousled head resting on his chest and kissed the traces of his seed of the young man's mouth and chin.

"What would you like, Harry?" Severus asked, fully expecting the answer to be something he had never considered allowing another man to do to him again but he would for this incredible man lying on top of him he realised, if that was what he wanted.

"Mhmmm? Oh nothing Sev. Not tonight" Harry said quietly but sounded quite relaxed and happy in his answer.

Severus shuffled down a bit and looked into Harry's eyes questioningly.

"What?" Severus's mind was reeling he couldn't believe Harry didn't want something more.

"Relax Sev, I am just happy like this, honestly" Harry replied with feeling.

Severus moved his leg so it rubbed against Harry's cock

"I can feel you are a little more than relaxed Harry, Mmmm?"

"Yeah I know but its ok, that will go. I just want you to hold me for a while Sev"

Severus sighed and relaxed as he realised Harry indeed was content and happy as the emotions poured through the bond. Severus felt more complete and loved than he had ever done in his entire life in that moment. He felt as if he had come home. Pulling the younger wizard closer to him he closed his eyes and held onto him tight, knowing it may be the last time he would ever feel like this.

A/N – I hope this turned out ok the whole thing with Stephen I hadn't intended putting in but after a few messages asking if it was Vernon that raped Harry I decided to add it. I realised that in the previous chapter that dealt with Harry's abuse I hadn't made it clear that it wasn't Vernon that had sexually abused Harry and rereading it now I can understand why it maybe sounded like thats what I meant but you see I don't think Harry would have ever enjoyed it if it had been that twisted evil man. Yes he was an abusive man but not in that way. I wanted to get across that money was more the important thing here and that Harry was guilty for allowing his body to be used in this way and being aroused by it. It had made him think of sex as something that was only done to him as though he was a toy for reward. Not something to be shared. Does that make sense?

Anyway, thanks to my reviewers again and for everyone that has favourited or alerted this story without you I would not have continued on since it is has been hard to write some of the scenes in the last few chapters. Please please review and let me know what you all think! I need you guys to keep me going

Love to Paon, Sheankelor and ieatmyfeelings for you support through the last chapter xx