Holly and Phoenix Feather

by EmberGhost

Imagine, if you will- What its like to be me. Eleven inches of Holly wood with a feather from a bird that's been known to spontaneously combust sealed inside of it... Not that fun right? Well, as you can guess, with an existence like mine, you have to get your kicks when you can. (Even if it is only silently making fun of idiot Wizards who would honestly be dead without me).

3. Three weeks

(Okay so, this is how it's going to be, the chapter lengths will vary, some will be shorter then others, I would have liked for them to be longer, but I'm trying to keep it under twenty minutes.)

-Three weeks.

Alright I take it back, I want to go back to Ollivander's now, please? See I'm begging! I never beg!

I mean, how the hell was I suppose to know that the brat had some great destiny laid out before him? I don't want to deal with that! You know what happens to the wands of Wizards with destiny? They get broken! And, on the off chance that they aren't broken, as soon as their 'master' dies they ether get buried with the poor sod or placed in some museum! So at best I've got maybe ten years left of my temporary freedom before something else happens to the kid. I mean, he was already hit with the killing curse once, he was lucky, he lived! Chances are, the next time he gets hit with one of those, the side affects are going to be a little more... Permanent.

Gah, and I'm still stuck in this ruddy box! Three week, three whole bloody weeks and the little brat hasn't even taken me out once! Not to practice any spells, or charms, not even to show the muggles he lives with, (I'm fairly certain that they're his family, I heard him call the large one 'uncle') Honestly, this is not my idea of freedom. House elves get more human interaction than this!

Now, in case you think that I'm just being a drama-Wand, let me give you a little perspective; Here's how my life has been since the brat bought me.

Day one: Find out this kid defeated Moldyshorts. Sit in box.

Day two: Sit in box.

Day three: Sit in box.

Day Four: Ooh, guess what? Sit in box!

Day Five: Sit in box.

Day six: Sit in box.

Day seven: It-say in-ay ox-bay.

Day Eight: Sit in box.

Day Nine: Casually lounge around... In box.

Day ten: Sit in box.

You get the idea.

Oh, and to top it all off, he has an owl! An annoying creature that I'm certain is out to get me, just sitting there watching me with its beady little eyes. Merlin! Is it to much to ask, just for a nice, quiet, owl-free life? Of course it is... Just you wait, one day the brat is going to find my splintered remains at the bottom of her cage and there won't be anyway to save me, mark my words...

Dammit, I hate it, I hate this kid. I hate Ollivander. I hate Toadywarts. I hate the brat's whiny cousin, and his evil owl, I hate this street, I hate this house. And I hate this stupid box!