A/N: Hey everyone! Sorry for the wait, I've been out of town. Without further adieu, here is chapter four.
The next morning, Elliot and Eli attended the 8 o'clock mass. Elliot was a regular there and Eli went with him every other week. During the service, Elliot found himself praying that he could make things right with Olivia.
Afterward, they went out for breakfast at a small diner near his apartment in Queens. As Elliot waited for his son to finish his waffles his thoughts drifted, once again, to his former partner. He wanted so badly to call her, but he also didn't want to seem too eager.
Fuck that, we have a lot of time to make up for, he finally decided.
"Eli, what would you think of having lunch with Olivia and her son?" He wanted to check with him before making plans because they only spent every other week together.
"That would be cool. I like being with little kids because they don't tell me what to do like Dickie does," he answered.
Immediate relief fled through Elliot when he heard Eli's response.
"Alright, I'll call her."
Shit, I have to call her.
Why is this so hard? It's just Olivia, he told himself. Just Olivia.
His tall, beautiful, curvy, smoky-eyed ex-partner 'just Olivia.'
God dammit. Man up, Stabler.
Taking a deep breath, he dialed her number. It was one of two he had memorized - Olivia's and Kathy's. The phone seemed to ring for hours, although it was only a few minutes.
His heart sang when he heard her throaty voice answer.
"Benson."
"Hi Olivia, this is Elliot." He felt the need to introduce himself since they hadn't talked on the phone in years.
She chuckled. He had obviously forgotten that Caller ID existed.
"I know, Elliot. What's up?"
"I was wondering if you and Noah would like to join Eli and I for lunch. You know, because I only have him until tomorrow, then he goes back to Kathy's. Anyway, he'd really like to see you, and he wants to meet Noah," he babbled, trying to keep his nerves in check.
She sighed, contemplating his offer.
"That sounds nice, but I think we need to talk alone before we bring our kids into this," she said. Although she undoubtedly wanted to see him, Noah was and always would be her first priority.
"I guess you're right Liv," he agreed, trying to hide the sadness in his voice. However, she didn't need to see him to know how he was really feeling.
"Tell you what. If you're free Wednesday evening, I'll have Lucy stay with Noah and you and I can have dinner then," she offered.
He usually had drinks with his coworkers on Wednesdays, but this was far more important to him.
His voice was no longer sad. "Sounds like a plan. Can I pick you up at seven?"
"See you then, Elliot."
EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO
When Wednesday rolled around, all the details were settled. She had texted him her new address, and they decided on a small Italian restaurant near her apartment.
Her nerves were getting the best of her as she sorted through the clothes in her closet, unsure of what to choose.
Is this a date? No. It's definitely not a date. We're just going to catch up over dinner, she thought to herself. Shit, that sounds like a date.
After deciding that she was most definitely not going on a date tonight, she picked a purple sleeveless blouse, black fitted pants, and simple black suede heels.
Once she was dressed, she took in her reflection in the full length mirror next to her dresser. Her top was revealing yet tasteful, showing just the right amount of cleavage. The deep purple color of her shirt set off her chocolate colored hair and eyes. The black pants she had chosen were flattering, and the suede heels were the perfect finishing touch to her outfit. Satisfied, she removed her heels and started on her makeup. Other than her usual mascara and blush, she gave herself a slight smoky eye and added only a tad of neutral lipstick, because this was definitely not a date. When her makeup was satisfactory, she grabbed a black trench coat in case the late-summer night became chilly. She put on her heels and returned to the kitchen, where Noah and Lucy were eating dinner.
"You look really nice, Olivia," complimented Lucy.
"Yeah Mom. Are you sure you're not going on a date?" added Noah.
"I'm sure honey," Olivia replied to her son, who shared a knowing look with his babysitter. They both knew she was going on a date.
Olivia gave her son a hug, then he returned to his mac and cheese. She checked the time on her phone.
"Six fifty eight, Elliot should be here soon," she said, taking a seat on a barstool in her kitchen. She turned toward her son and Lucy.
"So, what do you two have planned for tonight?" Olivia asked them. Noah answered first.
"I'm going to show Lucy my new Transformers and then we'll probably watch a movie."
"Sounds fun. I should be home by eleven," said Olivia.
"Take your time, I'm sure you'll have a great time," Lucy told her with a smile.
Olivia was about to respond when she heard a familiar knock on the door. Her pulse sped up as she rose to open it.
There he was, standing in the doorway. He wore a steel blue shirt that set off his icy eyes, along with a black leather jacket and dark jeans. She forgot to speak for a few seconds, dumbfounded by how handsome he looked. She finally smiled at him and snapped out of her haze.
"Hey Elliot, come on in," she greeted, opening the door.
"Lucy, this is my friend Elliot," she said before turning toward him. "Let me grab my purse then we can go."
He nodded at her, a slight smile gracing his lips when he realized that she was not, in fact, wearing a ring. Once she returned with her purse, he motioned toward the door.
"After you," he said, placing his hand on her back and then quickly pulling it away. He wasn't sure what physical contact was allowed, although he was pretty sure they both wanted it. It was comforting, if anything. He decided to put his hand back on her blouse until they reached the elevator. Olivia pushed the call button. When the elevator arrived, they stepped forward and then back again, realizing that they couldn't both fit through the door at once. Their laughter broke through some of the tension hanging in the air.
"Ladies first," said Elliot, motioning to the door. Olivia thanked him and walked inside the elevator. When he had joined her inside, he turned toward her.
"I didn't want to say anything in front of Noah and Lucy, but you look really nice," he complimented, eyeing her outfit appreciatively.
"Thanks El. You look pretty good yourself."
"Pretty good? That's all?" he joked.
She rolled her eyes. "Wow, your ego certainly hasn't aged. Don't push it Stabler."
The elevator dinged and the both stepped out. He opened the car door for her once they got to his sedan.
She eyed him. "You know this isn't a date, right Elliot?"
He laughed. "I know Liv. Just being nice."
"Well thank you."
"Anytime."
EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO
The short drive was silent, but not awkward. They had plenty to talk about, but they were both content in each other's presence for the time being. Neither of the two wanted to start their discussion in the car, so they made small talk.
"Does Eli like soccer? Noah wants to play again next year."
"Yeah, I think so. That little one has so much energy, I don't know what to do with him sometimes," he said with a chuckle.
She let out a happy sigh. "So does Noah. But I wouldn't trade it for anything."
"Me neither. I must say, motherhood looks great on you, Liv," he said while pulling into a parking spot near the restaurant.
"Thanks. I love it so much. Having a family, even just Noah, is truly the most fulfilling thing I've ever experienced," she gushed.
"I'm so glad you finally know what it's like," he said as they walked into the dimly lit restaurant. A middle-aged waiter seated them at a table for two and took their drink orders; Cabernet for Olivia and a beer for Elliot.
"Alright, how should we do this?" she asked, motioning between them. He understood that she was asking how to go about the conversation that so needed to be held between them.
He laughed at her need to have a plan. "Well, we could just let it flow, or," he said, pausing for dramatic effect, "we could take turns asking questions about the last seven years."
She nodded. "Okay, I'll start," she began. "Why did you and Kathy get divorced?"
"Wow. You still don't sugarcoat anything," he observed before answering her question. "Long story short, we didn't have a lot to keep us together after Liz and Rick started college. We'd been busy with kids our whole marriage, and when there was only one left, we didn't know how to act. It was like we were two different people who weren't really meant for each other after all. We both knew it was time, and we signed the papers shortly before Eli's eighth birthday. It was amicable. Thirty three years is a lot of time. We're still family. It's just… different now."
She nodded. "Alright, the next question is yours."
He took a long sip of his beer. "When did you get divorced, Liv?"
She nearly spit her wine across the table.
"Excuse me?"
He looked confused. "Weren't you with someone? I mean, unless you're the Virgin Mary and Noah is Jesus or something but-" he stopped talking when he heard her laugh.
"El, Noah is adopted. He was the son of a pimp and a rape victim, both of whom died. The family court judge asked me to foster him, and I adopted him a year later." She couldn't help but grin as she told the brief story.
A weight lifted off his shoulders as it registered to him that she had not only called him by his nickname, but she also had never married.
The waiter came back to take their orders, and then they returned to their chat.
"Alright. My turn," said Olivia. "Do you have a new job now?"
"Yes, actually I do. I was retired for about a year and then I went back to school for crime scene investigation. The hours are still difficult, but it's less emotionally taxing," he told her, rubbing his hands across his face as memories of SVU cases fled through him. "I heard you're Lieutenant Benson now, what is that like?"
"It's… different. But the change was good. The best part is the hours. The worst part is that I still have to deal with the scum of New York City," she admitted.
She took a deep breath, trying to muster the courage to ask the question she'd danced around all night.
"Why, El?" she asked, looking him in the eye, "Why'd you leave?"
He mirrored her deep breath, gathering his thoughts. He had known she'd ask this.
"Honestly? I didn't want to hurt you, burden you with my problems. Shooting that girl… it broke me. For awhile, I was just a shell. I was numb. It was like I was alive, but not living. I'm sure it contributed to my divorce. I started seeing a shrink, but by the time I was better I didn't think you would even want to hear from me." He took another sip of his beer.
She didn't feel like arguing, so she nodded.
"I'm glad you got help. When you left, I needed help too. You were the only person who really mattered to me. I mean, the squad is my family, but you were everything. I wasn't sure what to do with myself after you put your papers in. You had Kathy and the kids, and I didn't really have anyone," she huffed cheerlessly. She wasn't trying to guilt trip him, but he needed to know what he put her through.
He rubbed his face again.
"I'm so sorry Liv. I just hated to bother you with my problems."
"You could have El, and you still could. That's what friends are for. I know you wanted to protect me, which I appreciate, but you didn't need to."
His gaze was serious. "I know, Liv. That was my mistake. If there's anything I can do to make it up to you, just tell me. Semper Fi. I meant it, Liv, I still do."
"Semper Fi," she repeated as the waiter set their dishes on the table.
EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO
The rest of dinner was filled with pleasant discussion. They covered everything from his kids to Noah's preschool years, to the new members of her squad. Elliot paid the bill and Olivia left the tip. He resisted the urge to grab her hand as the walked out of the restaurant.
It was a little after ten thirty when he parked his car outside the Benson residence. The ride to her apartment was too short, in their respective opinions. They'd both enjoyed the night as Olivia and Elliot instead of Benson and Stabler.
"I'll walk you up?"
She nodded, appreciating how he'd said it as a question instead of just assuming he was welcome upstairs. His obvious respect, or maybe the wine she'd consumed earlier, gave her the courage to grab his hand. He gave hers a gentle squeeze and they shared a smile as the walked to the elevator, hand in hand.
Once they had reached Olivia's door, she turned toward him and grabbed his other hand.
"Tonight was really nice, El. Thank you."
"No, Liv. Thank you. If I were you, I'd be pissed at me," he admitted.
"How are you so sure that I'm not?" she asked jokingly. The both laughed. Once it was quiet again, Elliot spoke up.
"Hey Liv? If this were a date, which it isn't, would this be when I kiss you?"
A small nod from Olivia gave him some of the courage she'd had before.
"Yeah, I think so."
She leaned in, making it apparent that she wanted to be kissed. He brushed some fallen strands away from her face and then met her lips with hers, not moving at first. They stayed still, savoring the moment. Finally, she moved against his mouth and his hands went to her waist. Her hands found his chest. The kiss lasted for a few seconds before Olivia pulled back.
She couldn't help but grin. "Thank you for tonight, El."
He laughed, in a state of disbelief. "Believe me, it was my pleasure."
"You know, usually after dates, especially those that go as well as this one did, they call each other," she flirted.
"You're really asking a lot here, Liv. I don't know," he joked.
"Call me, you asshole."
"I will. Goodnight Liv."
"Goodnight, El."
A/N: They finally kissed! Please review and let me know what you think of this story, good or bad. Thanks for reading!