This will be the last chapter for about a week. It's shorter than the last few chapters. Sorry about that. Thanks for your reviews guys, and keep reviewing!
Disclaimer: I don't friggin' own Naruto.
As Kakashi and Naruto walked down to the washroom, Naruto jumped at every sound that came from the bushes.
"Naruto for goodness sake, it's just a squirrel!" Kakashi sighed.
"But what if it isn't?" Naruto whimpered.
"Then we run." Kakashi answered.
"Are we there yet?" Naruto asked. "I really have to go!"
"Yes, actually. We're here." Kakashi said, answering Naruto's questions as they stopped in front of an outhouse. Naruto stared at it apprehensively before speaking.
"...Sensei, what is it?" Naruto asked.
"It's the bathroom, of course." Kakashi replied.
"But it's dark and scary and really stinky!" Naruto cringed, plugging his nose with two fingers.
"Well, yeah. It's an outhouse after all. Now just take the flashlight and go." Kakashi ordered, desperately wanting to get back to the tent so he could sleep.
Naruto took the flashlight and tentatively stepped into the outhouse and shone his flashlight in.
"Actually all of the sudden, I don't need to go anymore! Weird, huh? Let's go back now!" Naruto said abruptly, heading back for the campsite, but Kakashi grabbed him by the collar of his pyjamas.
"Hold on. You just said a moment ago how badly you needed to go. And now you say that you don't need to go. That doesn't work, Naruto. I'm not going to be woken up in an hour from now to hear that you suddenly need to go again, so you're going to go now." Kakashi sternly told Naruto, putting emphasis on the last word.
"But it's scary in there!" Naruto whimpered.
"Naruto, it's just an outhouse! It's not going to eat you." Kakashi sighed.
"Yes it will!" Naruto cried. "What if I fall in-"
"You won't. I promise." Kakashi interrupted.
"Cross your heart and hope to die? Stick a needle in your eye?" Naruto asked.
"Um...yeah, sure. Whatever." Kakashi replied. "Now just go please so I can get back to sleep."
So Naruto went while Kakashi waited outside, muttering under his breath how stupid it was to be afraid of an outhouse and such, when suddenly Naruto let out a yelp and started screaming.
Now being trapped in a dark and smelly outhouse alone was very unappealing to Naruto, and he couldn't recall ever being on a mission or facing any situation that was as scary as the situation he was in right now. So he screamed very loudly.
"What's wrong?" Kakashi called out to Naruto, slightly alarmed.
"The flashlight burnt out! I can't get out of the outhouse! What am I going to do?" Naruto called back in fear.
"Oh man..." Kakashi groaned. "Just stay calm and try to feel your way out."
Naruto did as he was told, bumping into the walls three times before stumbling out of the outhouse, gasping the fresh air.
"Woah! That was scarier than any ninja I've ever faced before! I thought I was going to die in there!" Naruto gasped.
"And do that before you become Hokage? That would sure be a bad way for the future Hokage to go." Kakashi laughed.
"Hey, shut up!" Naruto cried half annoyed and half laughing as he playfully punched his sensei on the arm. He became oddly quiet for a moment as he realized something. "Hey, since the flashlight's burnt out now, how are we going to get back to the campsite without any light?"
Kakashi stood there, pondering for a moment. "...That is a good question. We'll feel our way back to the campsite and pray that we don't fall into a ditch or run into a bear along the way."
"Are you sure this is going to work?" Naruto asked, unconvinced.
"Just put your arms out in front of you. We can do it. We're ninjas." Kakashi replied, assuring his student.
Naruto whimpered as they started to feel their way back, waving their stretched arms out in front of them like a pair of blind people.
Back at the campsite, Sakura woke up for some odd reason and discovered that Naruto and Kakashi were missing, leaving her and Sasuke alone.
Her and Sasuke alone...
The fact and realization slowly hit her as she stifled a triumphant cheer. She called out his name first.
"Sasuke-kun?" Sakura softly called out.
Sasuke didn't stir.
Sakura edged closer to Sasuke.
Sasuke didn't stir.
She edged closer and closer every moment, until she was practically sitting on top of the poor guy.
Sakura started to (god forbid) stroke Sasuke's hair, purring "Sasuke-kuuuuuun", probably imagining weird fantasies of Sasuke and herself romping through flowery fields or something lame or even more disturbing than that.
Then she got the bright idea of trying to kiss Sasuke and was just about to do so, bending over his face, when…
"Sakura, what are you doing?"
Kakashi was poking his head into the tent, along with Naruto. Both were carrying a few scratches and numerous twigs in their hair after blindly falling into a ditch when trying to find their way back to the campsite. The two of them stared at Sakura bent over Sasuke, her face a little too close to his.
"Huh? Oh! I was-er-well, ummm...checking to see if Sasuke was still breathing! Yeah!" Sakura stammered, falsely smiling. "Well, good night guys!"
Sakura then flopped down on Naruto's sleeping bag, pretending to fall asleep on the spot...well she actually did right there and then.
"Ewww! Was Sakura trying to get all mushy with Sasuke?" Naruto grimaced.
"Unfortunately, it appears so. That Sakura really is too much sometimes." Kakashi sighed. "Now it's time to get some sleep."
"Alright. Goodnight, sensei. And goodnight to you too Sakura, you pervert!"
Naruto giggled at his insult as he rolled Sakura back onto her own sleeping bag, firmly placing himself between Sakura and Sasuke. He crawled into his sleeping bag, falling asleep shortly afterwards, mumbling things about ramen and becoming Hokage.
Sasuke began to sing softly in his sleep. Yes, he sang. God knows what, because he was mumbling it into his pillow. Sakura started to snore very loudly
Now Kakashi, unable to fall back asleep, had to endure Naruto's sleep talking, Sakura's snoring, and whatever else aside from singing Sasuke did in his sleep for the rest of the night.
"This is going to be a long night..." Kakashi grumbled as he put his pillow over his head, trying to block out all the noise.
The next morning, team 7 woke up, all a little groggy, except Kakashi who suffered the most from the lack of sleep that he was barely even awake and aware of what was going on, and Sasuke, who was also dead tired and refused to be dragged out of his sleeping bag altogether. Ok, so maybe only half of team 7 was awake.
Sakura made breakfast that morning, pouring the last of the saved cereal into everyone's bowls. Naruto stared sleepily at his cereal for a moment, forgetting how exactly to eat. He put a spoonful of cereal in his mouth and perked up immediately. Kakashi however, just stared and stared blankly at his breakfast, hardly even aware that it was breakfast.
"You should eat some, Kakashi-sensei! It'll wake you right up!" Naruto told the half-asleep jounin.
Kakashi stared at his breakfast momentarily before falling asleep and letting his head drop into the bowl of cereal.
"Woah! Kakashi-sensei's so hungry that he plunged face-first right into the cereal bowl with his mask on!" Naruto exclaimed.
"I think it's called sleep deprivation, Naruto. Not hunger." Sakura corrected him.
Naruto gulped down his cereal within a few moments. "Can I have some more cereal, Sakura-chan?" The blonde boy asked, still hungry.
"That was the last of it. We're now officially out of real food." Sakura sighed, fearing the amount of fish and rodents they would have to consume for the next few days.
"What? You mean we have to eat squirrels for breakfast now too? No way!" Naruto cried, not fond of the thought.
"Well, what else can we do until we get more food?"
"Yesterday, Kakashi-sensei said that he was going to get some more food. When is he going to get food anyways?" Naruto wondered.
"Hopefully soon. Unless he drowns himself in his cereal bowl first." Sakura replied.
Kakashi raised his head, face and hair soaked with milk and cheerios sticking to them.
"I'll go get the food now." Kakashi announced.
"Wow! You sure woke up fast!" Naruto said.
"I don't know whether I'll be back by tonight or back by tomorrow, but please do hunt and fish while I'm gone so you guys don't die on me. Other than that, please don't leave the campsite. I'm trusting you guys to be in charge of yourselves while I am gone." Kakashi told Naruto and Sakura.
Naruto began jumping up and down, "Ooh! Ooh! Can we call this a mission?"
"Sure, why not? You do that." The silver-haired jounin replied. "Well, I'm off. Good luck you two. And make sure that you get Sasuke out of the tent eventually."
With that said, Kakashi equipped himself with a small backpack and a few shuriken and kunai. He walked out of the campsite, leaving the three genins to their doom.
" ...We're all alone...in the wilderness...with practically no food!" Sakura mumbled.
"...PARTY!" Naruto shouted.
To be continued...
Just a note: Despite the part in this chapter where Sakura tried to kiss Sasuke, I was not trying to imply SasuSaku there. (No do I support that pairing.) I was trying to keep Sakura slightly in character, as kissing Sasuke while he's sleeping seems like a stupid thing she might do. This fanfic is not going to have pairings.
Don't forget to review, fools.