I walked and I just kept walking, I walked until I couldn't see the house anymore and then I just kept going. All I knew was that I needed to get away from there and from Jasper. I didn't know what he was doing here and I didn't care all I cared about was that he was there. It was a strange feeling seeing him again after all this time, like my heart was breaking all over again and the feeling was so over whelming I couldn't breath, my chest was becoming tight and it felt like my lungs were going to explode if I didn't regain control. It was exactly how I felt when he had first left and it was killing me. It killed me that I still loved him when I knew I shouldn't, I thought I had gotten over him when I had meet Mike but maybe I just buried him inside my head, locking away the memories and when I saw him it was like that door was unlocked and every good memory came rushing back at once as well as the bad. I remembered the way he used to look at me and kiss me and hold me, I remembered how good it felt to be with him and then I remembered when he left and I was broken, I remember feeling broken and crying and the depression that was slowly creeping into my life.

I had to stop walking as more and more memories came rushing back to the surface and I let my body fall to the ground grains of sand digging into my knees but I hardly noticed it, all I felt was my heart breaking even more and an intense hurt that rushed over me and it was becoming harder and harder to breath. I felt the hot tears run down my face and I looked up to the sky and the setting sun and I screamed, I screamed because I was in pain and because I was angry and because I couldn't hold it any anymore. Why was this happening to me, had I done something wrong to deserve this kind of punishment. Wasn't love supposed to be a gift that made your life better, like what Emmet and Rosalie had and instead of that the only two men I had ever loved broke my heart into a million pieces. It confused me that I still had feelings for Jasper and it made me wonder how much I really did love Mike, was I just joking myself, forcing myself to believe that I was in love with him so that I wouldn't have to think about Jasper anymore. It sounded like a good excuse but I wouldn't lie to my self like that, maybe in the beginning I was using Mike but I had fallen in love with him and the future we had but I had also been in love with Jasper for the same reason, because I could see what the future had in store for us and because I thought he would never hurt me or leave me. Did I love them so much because I knew they would give me the best future, because I thought they would never leave me. Was that why I was so in love with Mike, because he made me believe that he would never leave, the way Jasper had. He made me think he loved me and that he would never hurt me and I believed him so strongly that I had given everything to him. It was all so frustrating.

I sat back and landed on the sand bringing my knees up to my chest so that I was sitting in tight ball, I looked out across the empty lake and suddenly felt very alone. My heart was broken and I felt numb, it would take a while for me to move on but from Mike only because if I thought about it I was over Jasper, I would never have been with Mike if I wasn't and for now I would just let myself be broken, I needed to sort through all my feelings and thoughts, there where so many why's and not enough answer's and I wouldn't let myself slip into a depression again, not after the last time and how all my loved ones were so worried about me. It wouldn't do anyone any good and at least I had Rose Emmet and Alice to help me through everything. I didn't know if Jasper was going to stay at the house, if Rose would even allow him to and I didn't know if I wanted him to go or stay. I might still have feelings for him and be angry at him but before we were together we were friends and even if it wasn't a good idea I wanted to go back to how things used to be before.

I smiled at that thought and even figured that it might help if I had another friend to get me through the whole Mike thing. I rested my head between my knees and closed my eye's and just let everything go. I didn't want to feel hurt for a while, so I let myself go and listened to the sound of the lake and the trees and the birds, it was relaxing and I took a deep breath when a gush of wind rushed over me, leaving me shivering but I didn't move. I didn't want to go back just yet.

I sat there for a while with my eyes closed to the world and then heard the crunch of the sand as someone approached me, I willed them to just walk past me and leave me be, but it was probably a strange thing to see a girl all by herself curled up into a ball on the sand. I sighed and looked up but coiled back when I saw the face of a dog staring down as me. Fear rushed over me as the husky looked at me with blue eyes but I relaxed when he didn't attack, he actually look friendly and happy, his tongue was hanging out his mouth and tail wagging and his head was slightly twisted to the side, I smiled at him and brought my hand out for him to smell before I attempted to touch him so he could accept my scent. He barked excitedly and licked my hand before he started jumping around in the sand. I smiled at him and sat up on to my knees and called him over. He was a beautiful dog, mostly white with grey patched and paws and crystal blue eyes but he was bigger than the huskies I had seen.

"hey boy" I said rubbing his head and neck. I felt a collar under all the fur and pulled it gently so that I could see the name tag on it. "Tove, well that's an interesting name" I said to him like he could respond and it actually looked like he was smiling at me. "where's your owner" I asked and he barked and started jumping around again. He was so cute.

"Tove!" I heard a voice calling out and I looked around to see who it was and saw a tall male figure coming towards us. I stood up quickly and dusted the sand off of my hands and ass. Tove sat next to me and looked at the man like he had looked at me. There wasn't much light but I could still make out a lot with the light from the full moon. "Tove come" he called out but the dog wouldn't budge and I swore I saw his shoulders slump forward, I laughed and patted Tove on the head and he licked my leg. The man came closer and I could see that he was at least six foot if not taller and he had messy hair.

"Hi" he greeted when he finally reached us smiling down at me. He was extremely attractive, with a strong jaw and shard check bones and kind eye's which looked like a washed out green because of the moon. He had a lean build and wore a tight white shirt that hugged his chest and arms and black jeans. He was drool worthy.

"Hi" I said and returned his smile "uh is he your dog" I gestured down at the dog and his eyes followed.

"my sisters" he said and looked back at me, an easy smile on his face. "its weird he doesn't normally like strangers" he said looking at my curiously and I shrugged my shoulders and rubbed the top of Tove's head absently as we spoke.

"really? His so friendly" I said and he barked out making me laugh. It was like he was agreeing with me and I was going crazy if I thought the dog was agreeing with me, maybe I was tired and stressed or even both, I did have good cause to be either one.

"he must like you then" the stranger smiled at me and I smiled back with an actual genuine smile, Tove and the stranger making me forget my problems for a second without realising it. Tove barked again and licked my arm and moved away from me bouncing around between the two of us, making both of us laugh. He had a nice warm laugh that draped over me making me feel good and strangely happy.

"yeah I guess" I said and then looked behind me when I heard someone calling out my name. It was to far away to tell if it was Emmet or Jasper but it was definitely one if them. I turned to the stranger and smiled at him walking a little closer to Tove so I could bend down to give him a kiss which he returned by licking my face, from chin to forehead. I gasped when he did that and the stranger laughed at me and I joined in finding it hard not to.

"I should go" I said when I got up from the sand and gestured to the space behind me indicating that I was going in that direction. He frowned when I started walking away and followed me before stopping

"I'm Edward by the way" he said looking at me when I stopped and turned to look at him again. Tove was sitting next to him, wagging his tail with his tongue hanging out his mouth and his head slightly twisted to the side like he was looking at Edward.

"Bella" I said before turning again and walking off, away from him and Tove. I could still hear him barking but it got quieter the further away I got from them but that didn't make the smile that was on my face disappear. The short interaction with the excited husky was able to make me forget about what was going on in my life and I welcomed it but it wouldn't last. I walked along the sand for another minute before I saw a tall figure walking towards me, I started to panic at first but then remembered that my friends were looking for me and my stomach dropped when I saw that it was Jasper.

"Bella" he called out, running towards me and grabbing me into his strong arms, holding me tight to his body. I was a little tense at first not sure what to do but eventually just put my arms around his own body and hugged him. The embrace was so familiar and easy, it was like no time had passed between us but it wasn't intimate, just familiar and comforting. Maybe I was closer to moving past all this than I thought I was. He let go of me after a while and held me at arms length, his blue eye's roaming over my body, checking if I was ok. His hair looked pale under the moon light and the black shirt he was wearing, pared with the moonlight made him look pale, but his eyes were the same.

"I'm so sorry Bella" he gushed out when he was finished looking me over, looking me in the eye instead so that I could see how serious he was. "I didn't mean to hurt you, that was the last thing I wanted to do and i'm not just talking about what happened when I left I'm talking about earlier..."

"Jasper" I yelled his name so that he stopped talking "its fine, i'm fine" I stepped out of his embrace and smiled at him "you just surprised me and a whole bunch of forgotten feelings come flooding back and I was angry" I said and found that it was true. I loved him I did but I have moved on from him, the feelings I had just lingered behind and came back when I saw him and the hurt I was feeling was amplified by what Mike had done to me. If Mike hadn't cheated on me I think I might not have been so pissed off and sad that he randomly popped up out of nowhere after so many years and the only love I had for him now was the love I had for him when we were friends and that was all.

"I'm still sorry." he said and his face was filled with guilt and pain and I smiled at him and sat down on the sand. He paused for a second before joining me, a breeze swept across the sand making my hair fly around my face and sent a small chill down my spin but I wasn't cold. We sat there for a while both of us not sure what to say next or how to move forward but to do that we had to let go of what ever feelings we had left for each other and start over again.

"Jasper?" I asked breaking the silence.

"Bella?" I turned to look at the side side of his face while he looked out across the lake.

"Do you really still love me?" he stiffened at my question and slowly turned to look at me his blue eye confused and uncertain. I smiled at him and leaned my head on my arms.

"I don't know" he said looking away from me with a frown on his face, he contemplated what I had just told him for a while longer but didn't look at me when he spoke "I don't think I do. I mean I thought I did but I'm not so sure anymore" he said and I smiled even though he couldn't see it.

"i feel the same way" he looked at me then the frown returning again making me laugh "don't get me wrong I'm always going to love you but not they way I did when we were together, if anything that love turned into hate until it finally just disappeared but I loved you before that as well and I think I love you like that now. Its hard to explain" I laughed at myself and it was my turn to look away.

"I think I know what you mean" he said and I could hear the smile in his voice "I screwed things up pretty badly didn't I" he asked and I scoffed

"Yeah you did, like a massive fuck up" we both laughed and it felt good like something was being lifted off my shoulders. "but nothing that can't be fixed.

"I'm not so sure" he said his voice losing some of the laugher I had heard earlier. I knew he wasn't referring to us but rather Rose and his parents. I didn't know how much he knew if Rose had even spoken to him since I left

"You need to at least try" when he didn't respond to me I moved closer to him and leaned my head on his shoulder and he leaned his head on top of mine. "she miss's you, I don't think she ever stopped missing you" I said after a long stretch of silence. It was nice sitting here with him like this like it used to be before we complicated things by being together. "she's probably already forgiven you but wants you to suffer a little longer" I tried joking with him and smiled when I got a small chuckle.

"`I'll try"

"good"

"Alice told me what happened" I froze when he said that "With mike" he carried on, a question in his voice but I didn't know what it was. I pulled away from him and took a deep breath. I had forgotten about him for a second "I'm sorry about that"

"I'm not" I said a stray tear finding its way down my check "i would rather not be in a relationship with someone who cheats on me" and it was true because who would want to be

"His still a dick for doing that to you" I laughed at him "If I knew were he was I would march right up to him and kick his ass" I laughed again this time with a little more feeling and he laughed with me "I'm being serious" he said his laugh carrying through with his words.

"you have bigger fish to fry"

"I know" I stood up after that and waited for him to join me before we started walking back towards the house. We were quite the whole way and I could tell he was nervous but he also needed to do this, for both himself and Rose and he was going to have his work cut out for him.