Sakura was at a precipice of a cliff. If she looked down, she would be gone, she knew. She didn't know what was at the bottom (madness and despair), but she didn't want to be there. Not yet. She needed to keep herself together throughout the exam, if she wanted to survive. So she didn't look down. She kept her thoughts far away, her mind locked, not thinking about… (dismembered bodies and warm tongues)

She had to find her team. That was the priority. (drip drip drip fell the blood in her head) She thought about the wind that ripped her from Naruto and Sasuke, the unnaturalness of it. They were probably fighting, she concluded. She had to find them; they had to get out of this wretched forest.

Following the path the wind left wasn't hard, the destruction left in its wake easy to pinpoint. Sakura marveled at the broken branches and ripped leaves, feeling lucky that she had survived. She remembered how she had crashed against the tree trunk, and after that, how… (anguished screams)

Sakura counted her kunai, taking stock of how much she had left. There were only a few missing, thankfully. She gripped one in her uninjured hand, trying to curl the other one into a fist. The pain was too great, and she hissed, relaxing it. Glancing down, she realized the bandage was bloody. She had to change it soon, she noted, if not disinfect it. An infection was probably setting in already…

(she carefully ignored the trembling, not thinking about how she had gotten the injury)

Reaching the clearing where she remembered the wind surprising them, she slowed and looked around. There was no sign of Naruto and Sasuke, and she felt desperation rising. How would she find them now? She couldn't see any tracks, and besides, tracking had never been one of her strong points. And the forest was huge.

(desperation meant giving up meant remembering meant…)

But wait. She could hear distant sounds of battle. If she concentrated, she almost recognized Naruto's voice. She gave a sigh of relief and headed in that direction. (back to the mundane state of mind) (the blood still dripped)

Threading more carefully now, she nevertheless hurried along, reaching the scene quickly. Her eyes darted around, taking stock of what was happening. After surveying the scene, she immediately felt a bit lighter.

Naruto was unconscious, a kunai pinning the back of his jumpsuit to a tree, but he appeared to be breathing, and there were no visible injuries on him. If there was anything she knew about Naruto, it was that he was resilient, and she was sure he would survive this. Sasuke, on the other hand, had the enemy strung to a tree with ninja wire, and he was making handsigns for a jutsu.

The enemy was a long haired kunoichi from Grass, and Sakura vaguely remembered unease watching as the woman flicked her tongue unnaturally (it felt like a lifetime ago, and maybe it was, because back then that unease was fear, but back then she didn't know fear, didn't know being alone and trembling and).

But that didn't matter; Sasuke-kun had everything under control. For the first time in a while, Sakura felt like she could escape the nightmare that was the exam. Her team was alive, and if they were lucky, they might even get the scroll they needed from this enemy, and then they could leave!

Feeling light, she blurted out, "Sasuke-kun!" realizing that she probably should have waited for him to finish the jutsu. But Sasuke only flicked his eyes her way, not letting his concentration or his handsigns falter. Fire bloomed out, so hot Sakura felt the heat from where she was standing.

Sakura's elation disappeared. She looked at Sasuke in dismay. He killed her! He didn't need to kill her, did he? He had had her already subdued, they could have just taken the scroll and left. What had he been thinking? He was the same as… (don't think about it, don't think about it, don't think about it)

Sakura could barely breathe, her breaths coming out in short gasps. The kunai fell from her limp hand, clattering down to the huge branch she was standing on. She was panicking, she was back there, her hand pinned to the tree, a shinobi being ripped apart in front of her, feeling relief that he wasn't attacking her, and…

There were chuckles coming from the scorched body in front of them.

Sakura's panic came to a screeching halt, her thoughts jerking back to the present. How could she be alive? A feeling of wrongness arose. They had to leave, now!

"Sasuke-kun!" she said, urgently. But Sasuke was staring at the enemy, frozen. Was that fear? Sakura almost couldn't believe it. Sasuke-kun was unbeatable, Sasuke-kun was perfect, Sasuke-kun was… shivering?

Sakura jumped to his branch, planning to get him to move, even drag him if need be. But it was already too late, as the enemy's chuckles stopped. She looked up just in time to see her (his?) neck extend, unnaturally, stretching like gum. She didn't have time to react, and the head dove towards Sasuke.

It all happened too quickly for her tired mind to follow. Sasuke was screaming and clutching his neck, the enemy was saying something, but Sakura was too panicked, too preoccupied and the words were just a buzz in her ears that she couldn't follow. She wanted to scream out, to demand an explanation, but her mind was mudded and her mouth wouldn't listen. The moment passed and the enemy was gone.

Sakura realized she was kneeling, Sasuke's head in her lap. His pained moans had stopped, and his breathing had evened, but… he was unconscious.

(don'tbreakdown)

"Sasuke-kun?" she said, in a small, little girl's voice. She was lost.

Her gaze moved to Naruto's form.

"Naruto?" she whimpered, sounding even weaker, "help me. I'm scared."

But Naruto wasn't answering. There was nobody there to help her.

(keepyourselftogether)

She was lost and she was alone. But, as her eyes alternated between her teammates, she thought, her resolve strengthening. She was alive. She was able. And her teammates needed her.

She wanted to scream and panic. She wanted to cry and breakdown and go home. But she couldn't, not yet.

A few tears dripped down her face, but her eyes were hard. She had two defenseless boys to take care of. They depended on her. They needed her.

(she wasn't going to think about blood and sand and grins. she wasn't)

They weren't safe, she knew. They could never be safe in this godforsaken forest. But they were as safe as she could make them. She had laid traps to the best of her ability, had relocated them to the most defensible position she could find, and her weapons were close at hand. Sakura couldn't do much more until her team awoke. If they awoke, whispered a treacherous part of her brain, that she quickly squashed. Sasuke had a fever, and Naruto wasn't waking up, so she had to…

She was shaking. There were tears in her eyes. Immediate crisis averted, there was nothing she had to do anymore, and… There was blood on her, from a shinobi that Gaara had ripped apart right in front of her.

Gaara

Thinking about his name broke every barrier that she had built. All her suppressed emotions came flooding back. He had killed in front of her. For her. Sakura curled into a ball, trying to keep the memories inside, away, but they were rushing, out of her control.

Sakura broke.

And the worst part, the absolute worst part was that she hadn't felt repulsed at first. No, her first reaction had been relief. She had been thankful that Gaara had saved her, that the nin was off of her. She felt sick with herself.

She curled up even more, pressing her palms to her mouth to stifle her sobs.

And the blood, there was so much blood… She couldn't handle this. She just couldn't. She hadn't been prepared for this when she had decided to become a ninja. The death… she had been aware it was something that came with being a ninja, but she had never been prepared for it, not really.

This wasn't the first time she had seen someone die, but this was closer, more personal. And there was also that part of her that remembered seeing Gaara's memories, remembered feeling the thrill that came with killing, the freedom, that rush of having power over someone else, and… She cut that thought.

Sakura knew she could never feel like that, could never stomach killing someone in cold blood, without feeling remorse. But it was still terrifying to be faced with that possibility. With those feelings.

But Sakura was practical. At her core, she was rational, and she knew that she had to pick herself up, to glue the pieces of herself, of her composure, back together. So she clenched her fists, and her teeth, and curled into herself even more. And she made herself face it.

And that led her back to Gaara. By now her tears had been reduced to sniffles, but her insides were still clenched in fear. It wasn't the desperate fear of danger, it was more that icy cold fear of discomfort and remembrance, knowing that something had to give. And fearing it. But she finally allowed herself to think about the last few days, rationally. She had to accept that there was something going on between her and Gaara. He hadn't killed her yet, and even though there was real danger of that happening, there was a part of her that was sure he wouldn't.

And that brought her to the root of her misery. She was afraid of Gaara, she was, but she was more afraid of her reactions. She couldn't explain them, she couldn't understand her own feelings, and that had never happened to her before. She was drawn to him, those words she said during their last encounter proof enough. But why had she said it? That she didn't mind that… whatever had been happening between them? Of course she minded! She shouldn't… didn't want to have anything to do with him. And yet, as if something was compelling her…

Sakura's thoughts drifted away. Her panic abated, tiredness finally catching up. She didn't feel happy, nor normal, but she did feel better. Thinking helped, regardless of the fact that she hadn't reached a conclusion. There was still heaviness in her chest, but she could breathe more normally, and she drifted off…

Sakura awoke with a scream in her throat. Just a nightmare, she told herself. It was just a nightmare. She couldn't even remember what she had dreamt about, only that there was that ever-present fear. But then again, the fear hadn't left her when the dream did. The fear wasn't the product of her dream, it seemed a part of her now. She almost couldn't remember how it was before, before the fear. What it meant to be free of the constant paranoia.

Then normal thought returned to her, and she straightened in panic. She wasn't supposed to fall asleep! Enemies could have attacked them (killed them), at any time. But with a quick look around, she affirmed to herself they were safe. A whoosh of air escaped her. They were lucky. For the first time in a while, they were lucky.

But the tide could change at any moment. Sakura was aware that the traps she had placed were rudimentary, low-level tricks that they had learned in the Academy. It gave them a layer of protection, but protection that could be torn apart in an instant. And Sakura wasn't in a condition to fight.

And they were being targeted by Orochimaru. Or at least Sasuke was. Orochimaru, one of the three legendary Sannin, the one that went rogue. Sakura knew a huge amount of information about the other two, Tsunade being famous for her medical prowess, and Jiraya for his Sage jutsu. Sakura studied them both extensively, in the Academy, as she did everything else. Compared to the two of them, Orochimaru was only glossed over, only being mentioned as their third teammate that eventually betrayed the village and became a missing nin. Sakura now knew that he wasn't just a teammate to the two legends, he was powerful by himself, too powerful. And he wanted something from Sasuke… Sakura shuddered. She hoped they could leave the Forest soon, that someone could fix Sasuke and protect them from Orochimaru. She hoped she'd never see the rogue nin again. If only her teammates woke up.

Sakura yawned, her limbs feeling like lead. Her fitful sleep didn't provide her much rest, and she was mentally stretched thin. She might have quelled the panic, but she had barely come to terms with the situation. Her injuries were throbbing, and the bandage on her hand was bloody. Yet, she was reluctant to change it, as she was running out of bandages, and she wasn't sure whether Sasuke and Naruto had thought to bring any. Even if they did, Sakura knew she had to conserve their supplies as much as possible. They weren't even close to leaving the forest yet.

Sakura felt a pang of loneliness, merging with the ever-present fear. She had prided herself on being level-headed in situations under pressure, but the simulations they had in the Academy weren't even close to what she had encountered in the last few days. Having had more panic attacks than the number of days they were in the Forest, she knew her level-headedness was a farce. She was alone, and she was one step from breaking. But she had to hold on long enough.

Judging by the position of the sun, she had slept through the night. So careless, she berated herself. Anyone could have found them. Shaking her head, she quickly ducked under the huge roots, checking on Naruto and Sasuke. They were both breathing more peacefully, and Sasuke's fever had eased up. Still, they weren't waking up…

Satisfied, Sakura ducked back out, moving away from the huge tree whose roots hid her teammates, to the place she had slept. The night before, she had placed them in a small alcove under a tree root that had risen a bit above the ground. It was cramped, mossy and very damp, but at least they were hidden from view, if barely.

She had placed most of the traps around that tree, but had herself moved to the other side of the clearing. Close enough to protect them, but far enough not to immediately reveal their location. Sakura knew that any ninja with half a brain could easily find the small alcove, as well as dismantle her traps, but she had to do something.

Settling in a sitting position, her back to a tree trunk, Sakura surveyed her injured hand. It had swelled considerably, and she couldn't move her fingers more than a few wiggles, it hurt too much. The kunai had gone straight through her palm, and she knew she had to get it checked as soon as possible. Sasuke and Naruto should wake up soon, they had to!

Sakura was pondering on whether to check up on her teammates again, or to eat something, when the hair on the back of her neck stood on end. Cold shivers went up her spine, and she tensed, rising up into a half crouch. Fear rose up, the small measure of calm she had reached evaporating. Something was wrong. Something was coming. Then she heard chuckles coming from the trees.

"What a dedicated teammate you are, to stand watch," a cold, ironic voice called out, "but it's no longer necessary. Wake up Sasuke, we want to fight him."

And from the forest three shinobi landed into the clearing. Sakura felt fear fogging her thoughts, and her heart leapt into her throat, beating wildly. Still, in the middle of her panic, a stray, morbid thought rose to the forefront of her mind. Whatever they did to her, it couldn't be worse than being torn apart. That, surprisingly, kept her grounded, and with a clearer head she managed to survey her opponents.

One kunoichi and two nin. They looked… dangerous. The kunoichi seemed disinterested, and Sakura couldn't judge the expression of one of the males as he had most of his face under bandages, but the other one looked excited, his face split in a menacing grin. Then something tickled her attention, and she glanced at their forehead protectors. A single musical note. Sound village, Sakura thought. Why did that look familiar?Why did it make her hands shake? She couldn't remember, and…

She was back on that tree branch, next to Sasuke, and the head was rushing towards them, neck extending more and more, Sasuke was frozen and Sakura was scared and… The head had its mouth open, teeth sharp and gleaming… Sasuke was shaking beside her, Sakura couldn't move and it was all happening so fast, but at the same time it was as she could see everything in slow motion… The enemy was almost upon them and Sakura could see every detail of his face, his golden eyes, his skin peeling from the fire, with new, healthy skin underneath, like a snake… The Grass forehead protector almost gone, melted and underneath another one appearing, with a musical note gleaming…

And Sakura was back to the present with a start. They were connected to him. And they asked for Sasuke by name. But why did they want to fight Sasuke, didn't they know that whatever Orochimaru had done to him had knocked him out? What the hell did they want?

Panic, already a familiar state of mind for Sakura, covered her thoughts, and her shaking hand clutched her kunai tighter. The other one hung uselessly by her side. She tried to clench it, and failed, fresh blood soaking the bandage.

"What does Orochimaru want with Sasuke?" she half shouted, her voice sounding high and weak to her own ears. At least it didn't shake.

At the mention of Orochimaru's name, all three pairs of the newcomers' eyes widened, the girl's posture stiffening, and her gaze, that was sliding disinterestedly over the trees around them, fixing on Sakura.

Sakura continued on, too far gone to stop, "What did he do to him? And after whatever he did, you want to fight? Leave us alone!"

The bandaged nin hummed thoughtfully, and murmured, not addressing Sakura, "I wonder, what is he thinking?"

The other nin ignored him, and his grin, that had returned at Sakura's last words, widened even more, showing teeth.

"To leave her alone? She seems to know too much. We have time, Dosu, right?" he addressed his teammate, but continued on, without waiting for a reply, "I'll kill this girl quickly, and then I'll kill that Sasuke guy."

Sakura's hearts skipped a beat. She clutched the kunai in front of her. She had to escape, had to run away, she didn't want to die, but… she couldn't leave her teammates. She had been careful not to glance at the tree where her teammates were hidden, but if she ran, surely not all of them would follow her. And then they would find Sasuke easily.

The nin took a step towards her, but the girl suddenly spoke up in a monotone.

"Wait, Zaku. I'll take care of her. And then we'll take care of the little Uchiha under that tree."

Sakura's heart sunk, her feeble hopes shattered. They had known where he was, the whole time. It was over.

Zaku sent a surprised look at the girl, "Are you sure, Kin?"

The girl, Kin, scoffed.

"Of course. I can handle a mouse."

The bandaged guy, Dosu, shrugged, taking a step back, followed by Zaku.

And then Sakura had to jump back, avoiding a barrage of senbon. She had to make a plan. But what could she do? She had to stand her ground, protect her teammates. The other two seemed content to let the girl fight, but Sakura didn't doubt that they would join the fight if Sakura gained the upper hand. And she was skeptical that she even could gain the upper hand.

She had to avoid another volley of senbon, having to deflect a few with a kunai. Her injured arm was a big handicap and she couldn't avoid one, which lodged itself deep into her arm. Sakura hissed, her pain bringing a malicious smirk to Kin's face. Sakura threw a kunai her way, but Kin easily sidestepped, flinging a couple of senbon once more. Sakura dove to the side, barely managing to escape them all.

Hearing melodic tingling, she looked down, seeing a bell attached to the senbon that she hadn't managed to dodge. She pulled it out, clenching her teeth. But looking around, Sakura realized that some of the other senbon also had tiny bells attached to them. A feeling of dread rose, and Sakura was sure that those bells were more than cosmetic. But before she could try to figure out what they did, Kin made a gesture with her arms, and Sakura tensed, expecting more weapons, but none came. Instead, the senbon with bells tingled, reverberating around Sakura's skull.

Sakura tried to take a step back, but the world tilted, and she fell to her knees. Grabbing a shuriken, she looked up, trying to locate Kin, but… there were three of them. Sakura's mind spun. She threw the shuriken, but it flew of course, lodging into a tree trunk. The Kins in front of Sakura chuckled, and Sakura furrowed her brows, trying to concentrate, but… Her thoughts ran away from each other, her vision swimming… Pinpricks of pain rose throughout her body, Kin must have thrown more senbon, but Sakura couldn't think… The tingling filled her mind, and… The tingling! It was an auditory genjutsu, a rare one, Sakura realized. She remembered the theory of it from the Academy lessons, and it could be dispelled like any other genjutsu... Sakura forcefully lifted her arms, and forced her hands into a handsign, her injured hand barely cooperating.

"Kai", she whispered, and her vision cleared.

But Kin wasn't in front of her anymore. Sakura tried to jump away, but it was too late. A hand clutched a fistful of her hair.

"So you managed to escape my genjutsu? Doesn't matter, you're still weak… Such luscious hair," Kin said, while yanking harder on Sakura's hair, making tears come to her eyes, "if you had spent as much time training as you had taking care of your hair, you wouldn't be in this situation."

Sakura felt anger rising inside of her. Fear was a constant companion of hers these last few days, and she had enough. She was angry at her teammates for being unconscious, at Orochimaru for attacking them, at Gaara for all of his contradictory actions, at herself for being so weak. And it all found it outlet in Kin. Something inside of Sakura broke.

She screamed, a feral scream tearing out of her throat. She had never felt such rage, and her injured hand dove into her kunai pouch. She ignored the burning pain in her hand, yanked her head and slid a kunai jaggedly through her hair. Then she quickly spun, her eyes meeting Kin's startled ones, her hand rearing back in a punch. All her anger went into that punch, accompanied with all her strength and instinctively, her chakra. And Kin flew.

The enemy kunoichi impacted with a tree trunk, and slumped, losing consciousness. Sakura stood, breathing hard, strands of her hair, her long, lovely hair that she had grown out for Sasuke, in a circle around her. Rage seeping out of her, she came back to the present.

She was dead now, she acknowledged. That was… something. If she wasn't so empty and worn out, she would've felt almost proud. But it was the end, she had two enemies that could wipe her out in an instant.

Sakura looked up, preparing for an attack, but both of the Sound shinobi weren't looking at her. She spun around, following their gazes and… there he was. Sasuke. Strange malevolent energy swirling around him, his eyes fixed on her.

She had been waiting for him to wake up for so long, so why wasn't she happy? There was… something wrong.

"Sakura," Sasuke intoned, his eyes piercing, "who did this to you?"

She knew she looked quite a sight, her hair chopped up around her, a bunch of senbon sticking out of her body, the bandage on her arm soaked in blood, but that wasn't why she trembled.

There were black markings on Sasuke's body. They slithered around, almost like small snakes, originating from the bite on his neck. But that wasn't the worst. Sasuke's eyes were cold and bloodthirsty and at first she thought they reminded her of Gaara, but no, Sasuke's eyes reminded her of Orochimaru, and that was a whole new different kind of monster.

And that's that. How do you like it? I wanted to upload this as soon as possible, that's why there are most definitely some mistakes, please please tell me if you catch any.

No Gaara in this chapter, sorry. And what do you think about Sakura here? She was in a strange state of mind, I hope I managed to portray her panic realistically. Also, as to why there were no Team 10, or Lee and his team here, I imagine with Sakura more panicky, but also being more aware of possible danger, that she would look for a different, safer spot to hide than the one in the original, and that's the divergence. The others simply weren't close enough.

And I would like to thank everyone who reviewed, or added this story to favorites or alerts, it really means much to me!

And thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed.