"AWOOHOHOOOOOWUEURJJJSKKKKAWLLLLLLLHOOOOOOOO!"
I flipped a shit when my phone suddenly rang out. I mean, wouldn't you? It was metal blasting out of my palm, for goodness sake! And I firmly believe everyone else would have the same ridiculous reaction (I assume) that I had, which would be to immediately jump (3 feet) out of bed. Guess where I landed?
Pfft. I didn't land. I soared into the stars and landed in the arms of a beautiful black-haired, freckled pirate with the most gorgeous abs I have ever seen.
Hadihaha. I wish.
My back collided with the carpeted ground (I blame the ground, who obviously collided with me first) and my hand flew to my poor abused back. Ignoring the ringing phone for just a moment in time, I proceeded to give the floor a good smack. "Stupid floor.
But when I finally turned to give my phone some attention, what I saw made me feel like burning my eyes. On the screen was a mutated picture of my Pirate God of Sex (Guess who). Oh my One Piece, where did his abs go?! What happen to his perfect figure? Was that a small DICK?!
I gave a loud, unearthly, piercing shriek that most possibly resounded around the house. And I knew how the culprit was. "SEBASTIAN!"
I quickly changed the picture, permanently deleted that horrendous blasphemy, deactivated my phone, swiped my hand under the fluffy, comfortable bed, grabbing the chopper I kept under my bed, and ran out of the room. Okay, okay, I mean shuffle out of the room. And only to find my butler, one of the only people allowed inside my house, spoiling the well awake kittens downstairs. My eyes narrowed. "Oh my One Piece above, you are so dead."
He kind of ignored me. I guess he could sense/see my foul mood when it appeared. I mean, he practically was the root cause of it. I really wanted to kill him.
But I decided to just hold for a while. Placing the chopper between my two palms, I lifted it towards my ceiling. "Oh mighty God of Sex, let this chopper fly straight and true and kill the demon that degraded you."
Of course, nothing happened and the chopper rounded a bend and ended up in the wall a few feet away from that son of a blasphemy.
"Fuck. I knew he was a demon."
Sebastian gave a chuckle. "Don't worry so much. Of course the young mistress would miss, if not, I would be undeserving of being the butler of this household. And that the master and mistress would be upset because I would be unable to protect the young mistress."
"And that he is secretly a demon that could resist the effects of divinity." I added under my breath, settling to just sit at the dining table and flipping him the bird.
Was he talking to the kittens instead me?
The kittens probably didn't understand him. They just froze and stared at the chopper. Fuck that demon….
Third person POV
God of ... Sex? Looks like every other kitten picked up on that, cause the weird stares were kind of hard to miss.
Vii's POV
The kitten was staring. That kitten was staring. Well, to be fair, all the kittens were staring, but that one was giving me a weird stare. How in the world could kittens stare? But it was. The same one that was staring at me from the box.
And do you know it is rude to stare? Cause it is.
I picked up Mr. I-Love-Staring-Cause-It's-So-Fucking-Rude from the ground without breaking eye-contact, and continued staring it down as I sat it on the table. The same brown and purple little dipshit.
"Look kitty, I don't know why you love staring so much, but I ain't losing this time."
The two of us continued in our little silent staring match, until finally, about two minutes later, it blinked, and I swooped in joy. Haha.
"Beat that, kitty! So, stop! Staring! At! Me!"
I pumped my fist in the air, did a little jiggle of joy, before sitting back down and realizing that Sebastian and the rest of the kitty had seen the show. Damn that was embarrassing.
I waved one hand in the air. "You did not see me just have a staring competition with a kitten."
Sebastian chuckled and off he went.
The rest just continued staring.
I narrowed my eyes dangerously. "Wanna fight, punks?"
They scattered.
Ah, good days.