See, precisely on time, here's a chapter.
And I'll leave babble for the end, so enjoy.
Chapter 1 - Of Academy Days - Part 1
A pair of girls giggled quietly in the back corner of a classroom as they heard an enraged scream echo over the village.
"Ne, 'Ku-chan, which do you think they set off? The garlic shower on the bookshop? Or the paint bombs outside Training Ground Seven?" The brunette's grin widened as she imagined the potential results of their traps.
"No, too angry for those. It's the pink paint and glitter between the Uchiha and the Hyūga compounds." The younger of the pair gave a small smile, a glint of devious cunning shining in her eyes.
Their teacher turned from where he was writing on the blackboard to find the source of the whispering and narrowed his eyes when he saw none. Miku was diligently taking notes, turning innocent, curious eyes to the teacher when he remained paused for too long, while Fukuko stared boredly out of the window, absently doodling around the edges of her paper.
When the class was let out for lunch, the pair grabbed their bento boxes and ran out, scrambling up the largest tree in the academy grounds. They had constructed a small, well-hidden platform among the highest branches where they always came for lunch, after Miku had taught her friend to climb better. Fukuko got out a pair of binoculars, quickly focusing on the site of their trap and following the trail of neon pink footprints.
"Oh, high five 'Ku-chan, we got ourselves an Uchiha!" Miku gave her friend the high-five, nabbing the binoculars to confirm her friend's comment, and sure enough the footprints led straight to the Uchiha compound and vanished into one of the houses. The evil glint in her eyes was positively sparkling at the thought of the blackmail material.
The pair were in a joyous mood as they ate, though it was carefully hidden when they headed back to class. It wouldn't do to give away their identities as the masterminds, after all.
Fukuko was obviously more interested in the afternoon's lessons, enjoying the practical weapons training much more than the long, tedious lectures about Konoha's history. Besides, she learnt those bits much better when Miku explained it to her in the evenings, the younger girl knowing exactly what to threaten her with if she didn't at least learn enough to scrape through her exams.
At the end of the day they took to the rooftops for the quickest route home, subtly avoiding the various traps they'd laid on the more commonly used roofs. The pair hop into the trees that edge their garden, using the branches to swing to the ground. As soon as she passed the back door, 'Kuko dropped her school bag, slipped of her shoes and aimed for the kitchen for her next caffeine boost. Miku followed at a much calmer pace, also removing her shoes, and grabbed the older girl's bag to take upstairs.
Kuko took the newly made tea to a bench in the garden where Miku joined her to simply sit and relax, enjoying the tea, peace and quiet. Morikawa would usually check in on them around this time, always happy to snag a cup of tea and occasionally stay for dinner, however this time, he was out on a mission with his Genin team. During such times, the academy teachers would keep a closer eye on the pair, to make sure they were okay, and there were a fair few people they knew they could go to in an emergency.
After their tea, the girls worked on any homework they'd been given and Miku taught 'Kuko the important parts of the lessons she'd not paid attention in, reiterating the content into a pranking context, where possible, to make it more interesting. Needless to say, these were the things 'Kuko remembered best.
The hour or so before bed was their dedicated Prank Plotting Time, which took place in a secret basement. The entrance was disguised as an ornately carved shelf unit with a beautiful ornamental tea set displayed upon it. Here they would plan future pranks, discuss the results of previous pranks for refinement, reuse or discarding, and update their victim list. The first order of business was adding 'Uchiha ? - Fluorescent Pink Paint and Glitter Trap' to afore mentioned list.
"So, the paint trap was a provisional success. I'll fetch the camera later for verification." Miku spoke quietly as she wrote up the details on their list.
"I'll keep an ear on the gossip lines for the long term effects, see how long the added dyes stain their skin, and get a name for our victim. And I've got an idea for a double prank," Kuko's speech sped up in her excitement, and she eagerly continued at Miku's questioning raised eyebrow. "You know how Tsunade-hime* keeps beating up Jiraiya-san for things? We're going to be learning the Henge no Jutsu** soon, so if we prank Tsunade-hime while henge'd as Jiraiya-san…"
"We then get to watch the fallout of that as well for hours of fun," Miku finished with that devious glint back in her eye.
"Okay, first step, you need to show yourself as being bad at Henge no Jutsu, if I did it they'd never believe it, until a while after we perform this. Second, reconnaissance. We'll need to watch Jiraiya-san, get to know his habits and mannerisms to be able to convincingly act like him. Good plan, Kuko-chan. So, details…"
*o*o*o*
Miku slipped silently through dark, deserted back-alleys, practically disappearing into the shadows if she spotted anyone nearby. Only the slightest rustling emerged from the branch she pulled herself up onto to retrieve the camera she had hidden amongst the leaves. Mission complete, she crept back home, remaining just as unnoticed as on the way there.
*o*o*o*
In the mornings, the girls grudgingly rose at six o'clock. Their first half-hour was spent drinking tea to wake themselves up before going for an hour long run. They always ended at main gate, which was a five minute jog from their house, so Kuko could gossip with the pair of Chūnin who were the morning gate guards, Hisoka and Isao. It was a little known fact that the pair were probably the biggest gossips in the village, and Miku could easily picture them as a pair of old biddies, gossiping about anything and everything all day long.
The younger girl would exchange the customary greetings and five or ten minutes of small talk with the older men, before jogging home to cook breakfast, leaving her more sociable adoptive sister to her gossip-gathering. It was through this most useful source they found out that their victim had been Uchiha Inabi, the dyes had done their job - staining the man's skin a vibrant pink which, as yet, hadn't faded - and that the paint was rather stubbornly refusing to be washed out of the man's hair. All in all, prank successful.
*o*o*o*
"Well, class. Today, we start work on the most basic, yet crucial, of any shinobi's infiltration ninjutsu, the Henge no Jutsu." And suddenly a class of bored students magically transformed into a class of eager, excited students, causing their sensei**** to chuckle a little at the change.
"So the hand seals required are, dog," the sensei placed his left hand flat on top of his right fist, "boar," both hands formed fists with the bottom of the palms pressed together, both hands pointing to the ground, "and ram," again the hands were together, though not fists, the left slightly higher than the right, his ring and little fingers and thumbs curled with the lefts on top of the rights, and his index and middle fingers pointing up.
"Practice the hand seals without moulding chakra until I find them acceptable," a low groan echoed through a few students who thought themselves above such tediousness and wanted to just try the jutsu already.
Miku and Fukuko did as asked without complaint, the latter giggling when their sensei had to correct a few of the groaners' hand seals.
"Now, you may mould chakra as you form the seals, keeping the image of your target firmly in your mind, and release it steadily and consistently after you change, I don't expect anyone to get it first time, but to make it a little easier I want you to pair off and transform into your partner so their shouldn't be too much of a height difference between you and your target. Off you go."
Miku tried first, the pair expecting that she would get the hang of the jutsu fairly quickly, and sure enough, the sixth try gave perfection, though ' Kuko was still in hysterics from the results of the first few tries. Her favourite, by far, was the one-legged, zombie-Kuko of attempt number four, a picture of it ended up framed in the living room right next to an armless, one-legged, drooling, zombie-Miku which had arisen from 'Kuko's twelfth attempt just before they left for lunch.
That night, after Miku made sure 'Kuko could actually perform the Henge when she tried and wasn't sabotaging herself, the pair put their skills to the test. They transformed into Kamizuki Izumo and Hagane Kotetsu, a pair of known troublemakers from their class, and snuck over to the Hyūga compound, armed with cans of neon pink and lime green paint, setting to work redecorating the walls of the compound in stripes of the horribly clashing colours. For the first time, they were spotted as they finished their masterpiece, though it was entirely intentional, and the pair fled, their Henge still holding. They split up and, using all their knowledge of hidey-holes and unlit back alleys, ditched their pursuers. Once they succeeded , they dropped the Henge and stealthily made their way home, looking forward to the results they would discover in the morning.
*o*o*o*
On their morning run, Miku and 'Kuko were treated to the amusing sight of Izumo and Kotetsu being dragged by their ears by a pair of Hyūga , buckets of soapy water and scrubbing brushes in hand, presumably to clean the walls the girls had redecorated. Part One - learn Henge with 'Kuko seeming bad at it, complete. On to part Two - Reconnaissance.
It didn't take long to find Jiraiya, perched by the fence of the women's onsen***, giggling pervertedly as he peeked through a hole in the fence. The pair observed him silently for a few weeks, taking note of the little details necessary to pull off a convincing Jiraiya impression, that goofy expression when drooling over something pervertedly, the look of horror whenever he was caught by Tsunade - the pair had had front row seats to the royal beating he received when Tsunade caught him peeking at her in the onsen once - his habit of sleeping on the rooftops and, probably most importantly, learning his speech, the way he speaks, as well as the tone and sound of his voice for imitation, which would probably be the hardest part to pull off. So while 'Kuko spent a few days refining her imitation and forcing her voice to sound as close to Jiraiya's as possible, Miku finalised the details of the plan and kept a discrete eye on Tsunade to try and figure out the best opportunity to put the plan into action.
*o*o*o*
*hime = princess, Tsunade-hime is a common nickname for Tsunade due to being the 1st Hokage's Granddaughter
**Henge no Jutsu - Transformation Technique
***Onsen = Hot Spring
****Sensei = Teacher
And voila a chapter complete. Please feed the hungry muse else she'll go wandering to find her own food, and I really don't want to have to try locking her up again…
So, anyways, reviewers get cookies, and see you again for the next chapter.
Your trying-to-type-around-a-cat-flopped-on-the-keyboard author
Kouseki