I'm back, and I am blown away by the responses. In one hour I got 1 review, 2 favourites and 3 follows. And in 13 hours, I got 3 reviews, 4 favourites and 7 follows! Well shit, call me a happy camper. I have read your reviews and appreciate them! And without further ado, on with the show!

Story start

"No need to be so rough, Iruka-sensei," a visibly annoyed Naruto grumbled, rubbing his tender backside, " It's not like I was going to run away or anything"

"And I'm the fifth Hokage," Iruka retorted, "Naruto, just get in line and shut up."

We find ourselves at the sparring area just outside of the Ninja Academy, a place where aspiring shinobi go to learn the arts of the nin. A gaggle of children wait behind a reasonably tall man with blueish hair tucked away in the bandanna-styled standard Konoha forehead protector.

"Ah, our vagabond student finally decides to grace us unworthy peasants with his glorious presence." Mizuki smirked. Now, Mizuki was not a pleasant man to be around, what with his arrogant attitude and quick-to-arouse temper. He also has a profound hate for our protagonist whom he, along with many others, view only as the Kyuubi no Yoko and not the container. A ridiculous claim by any means. When a man puts his kunai in a woman's kunai pouch, does it make the woman the kunai? No, but that doesn't stop most civilians from despising the blond and would pounce at the chance of taking the boy's eyeballs and using them as soggy ping-pong balls.

The group of children behind Mizuki were, obviously, academy students, all of whom were irritated and frustrated. Understandably, considering the fact that they'd been waiting on the walking disaster known as Naruto for not an insignificant amount of time. 2 hours to be exact.

"Alright everyone, get in teams of two and get ready to spar! Let's get this over with, unless someone wants to delay even further today's lesson?" Iruka addressed the class, throwing a meaningful, and downright terrifying, glance at Naruto, one that promised unknown and endless suffering if he didn't comply. Naruto for his part, shook his head furiously.

"Good," Iruka turned around to observe his pupils milling about trying to find partners, thinking that things had finally calmed down and that his migraine might abate.

"Oi! Duckwad!" Why, oh why did Kami hate him so.

Spinning on his feet, he sees Naruto, legs akimbo and hands on his hips, glaring at a certain dark haired boy, whose hairdo indeed was similar to a certain avian.

"You should be honoured!" he exclaimed, " I'm giving you the opportunity to face of against the future Hokage! The great Naruto Uzumaki! If you're lucky, I might even go easy on you!"

Now, Naruto obviously expected his proclamation to be greeted with rousing applause, fireworks, and just maybe scantily clad women hurling themselves at him, but instead he got a round of uproarious laughter from the students for his efforts.

"Yeah right! It's more like Sasuke'll have to go easy on you!" yelled a fangirl.

Sasuke, the boy in question, responded in a manner worthy of any Uchiha. He hnn'ed. He fucking hnn'ed. That wasn't even a thing before his clan came by.

"I shall take that as an acceptance to my challenge of a duel! Come up hither to the dueling ring, so we may duke it it like noble gents! Prepare to get knackered!" was the reply to the oh so eloquent Uchiha.

"Naruto! Knock off the old time speech!" Iruka turned to the onyx-eyed boy, "I'm sorry Sasuke, but it seems that the only way to calm Naruto down is for you to spar with him, so if you could kindly...?" he trailed off in a meaningful way.

"Hnn" was his monosyllabic answer, but nonetheless, Sasuke joined Naruto in the sparring ring.

"You know, Sasuke, not knowing words with more than a single syllable is a sign of a lack of intelligence, right?" Naruto taunted.

Our favourite polysyllabic challenged Uchiha didn't show any reaction, aside from a narrowing of his eyes and crouching into his clan's taijutsu style.

"This'll be a taijutsu-only spar!" Iruka announced.

"So no ninjutsus or genjutsus are allowed, sensei?" Naruto asked.

"Correct," Iruka, not liking the way Naruto emphasized the words, started to feel slightly nervous about the well-being of his student.

"Alright! Sasuke, let's do this!"

"Hnn"

"God fucking dammit! Actually speak to me for once!"

"Hajime!"

Sasuke, already in his Interceptor Style taijutsu, prepared to surge forward and quickly end the spar, but was surprised when Naruto,who previously had his hands in his pockets and looked absurdly nonchalant, suddenly disappeared from his sight. Frantically looking around for his opponent, he didn't feel the presence behind him until he heard an all too familiar, loud and obnoxious voice.

"Here ya go, Sasuke! Enjoy!" Naruto cheerfully exclaimed, slapping a hand on his back.

Naruto quickly regained his previous position, only this time his hands were formed into the ram seal.

"Don't worry, Sasuke! This'll be a ton of fun!" he said, activating the hand seal, and subsequently, the gravity tag that he'd placed on his sworn rival.

Now, Sasuke was hailed as one of the strongest Academy students of his generation, said to already be at a low chunin level. He was many things; an avenger, a prodigy, the last loyal Uchiha of Konohagakure, an emo with a 7 foot rod rammed so far up his ass that it came as a surprise that whenever he opened his mouth, you didn't see the tip. But the one thing he was not, was someone who could withstand the gravity of the earth when it was multiplied by a factor of ten. So, it should've come as no surprise when he slammed into the ground in an ungraceful heap followed by an expressive, "Hnn!"

"Hot damn, Sasuke! I think that's the most emotion you've ever shown!" Naruto teased.

Sasuke, struggling to stand, could only glare at the blond maverick. And what a glare it was, it was one that promised death and untold, endless torment for the person responsible for his current predicament.

"Naruto! What in the name of all nine layers of hell, did you do?! I specifically said no ninjutsu or genjutsu!" Iruka bellowed.

"Calm your horses, sensei, you said no jutsus of any kind, but that wasn't one! That was my new Uzumaki domain! The ninja art of Fuinjutsu!" Naruto proclaimed who was, once again, much too cheerful for the situation that he was in.

"But what did you do?!" Iruka demanded, frantic for the health of the last Uchiha. If anything happened to him, the council would be on his ass faster than an Akimichi at an all-you-can-eat buffet.

"Don't worry, it's only a gravity seal! He should be fine in a couple of minutes, or hours!"

"Naruto, release Sasuke at once!"

"No can do, sensei, that right there is a semi-permanent seal, can't take it off, and even if I could, why should I? Duckwad over here needs a lesson in humility."

"Naruto..."

"Yes, sensei?"

"You have exactly 5 seconds to get out of my sight and report to the Hokage, right now."

"Shit."

"One."

"I'm out of here!"

"So let me get this straight,"asked the Third Hokage in his office up in the Hokage Tower, "After your little masquerade with the civilians, Iruka captured you, 'dragged you to hell and back and purposely tried to split your skull on every rock as the "asshole" villagers all laughed', and once you got to the Academy, you participated in a taijutsu match against Sasuke Uchiha, where you then used fuinjutsu to humiliate him?"

"Pretty much!" Naruto happily said.

Sarutobi Hiruzen could only massage his temples and take deep puffs of his pipe to calm his nerves. He sometimes felt like Naruto would be the end of him.

The Third Hokage was an elderly man who retook the mantle of Hokage after the death of his successor, the Fourth Hokage. With white hair and a frail body, one might mistake the Third for a weak old man. If one was to think that in the midst of the battlefield, they'd be swiftly reminded by a torrent of elemental jutsus and the cries for help, as the frail old man proceeded to rip them, and all of his enemies, a new asshole. Yes, Sarutobi was a man to be feared, said to have mastered over a thousand jutsus, he was hailed as the Professor of Shinobi. And here he was, scolding a child for an outrageous prank.

"And what exactly did you do, Naruto?"

"Oh nothing big, it was just a small prank."

"You call sneaking into the sewers, drawing a seal so that it would take in and store 800 gallons of human waste over a period of 7 weeks and then moving the seal to the civilian market and releasing said 800 gallons of sewage into the crowds 'nothing big'?"

"Yup!"

"I should never have given you that book on sealing..." Hiruzen groaned, "How did you get into the sewer?! Actually don't answer that question. More importantly, how did you even make the seal?! Storage seals aren't mentioned until Journeyman-level books, and you're only an apprentice!"

"Uhm, Anbu-niisan Inu might've lent me his sealing book..." Naruto admitted sheepishly.

"Oh did he now?" Hiruzen smirked, he now knew who caused all of his suffering, and revenge would be his and it would be sweet.

In the corner of the room, Anbu Inu,who was guarding the room along with Anbu Neko, couldn't help but shiver.
'Why do I feel like I'm going to be drowning in D-rank missions for the rest of the week?'

"What am I supposed to do with you, Naruto?"

"Let me go?" came the hopeful reply.

"Out of the question. Naruto, for disrupting the peace of Konohagakure, you will spend the next week cleaning up after the mess you made."

"But Jiji! I have to study for my exams!"

"Well that's just too bad. You should've thought of that before you made the market into an glorified toilet."

"...Stupid fucking old man, doesn't get the brilliance of my pranks. I'll show him one day!" Naruto sulked.

The Third couldn't help but chuckle at his surrogate grandson's antics. "Naruto" he said, his tone softer than the previously harsh one.

"The fuck you want," of course, Naruto didn't actually say the fuck to the Third, not unless he wanted to know what it felt like to receive a Suiton jutsu up the ass. Instead, it was more along the line of, "Yes Jiji? How may I be of service to my tyrannical grandfather today? Perhaps you'd like for me to jump of the Hokage Monument? How about cheese grating my face? Would that please the all powerful one?"

"Oh no, Hiruzen chuckled, "No need for any of that, although your suggestions have been taken into consideration for future use. I only wanted to say, great work on the seal, you did a bang up job on it."

"Thanks Jiji! It had to be! How can I be a great Hokage if I can't even make a simple storage seal?"

"Yes indeed, how? Because of the proficiency you displayed in the arts of fuinjutsu, I've decided to leave a low journeyman-level book on fuinjutsu in your apartment. It touches on simple storage seals and very basic explosive tags. Try not to misuse them. And under no circumstances are you to tamper with any of the seals, alright?"

"Yes, Jiji! You're the best!" Naruto yelled, ecstatic that he could finally advance in his favourite ninja art.

"Now get going, I believe you have an exam to study for."

"Hai!"

Naruto quickly ran out of the Hokage's office, excited at the prospect of learning new seals.

'Dear Kami, forgive me, I might've just released Konoha's greatest nightmare,' the Third prayed.

20 minutes later, we find Naruto tampering with the seals.

"Yes," he cackled madly," this'll do nicely for my problem with the bunshin! I'll definitely graduate next week, with explosive results!" Naruto let out a howl of maniacal laughter, both at his "success" and at his little joke.

The local residents couldn't help but suppress a shudder at the demented laughter that echoed through the air.

And done! So, yea. Much longer chapter. I know Sasuke seems a bit OOC, and that'll continue, I'm trying to make him seem more lifelike. The story has a slow build, but it should pick up soon. Leave a review, don't, start a new cult based on this story, I don't care, but reviews are always welcome! Author, out!