Hey, I'm back after only 2 weeks of inactivity! I said I'd try and keep it once every two weeks and I delivered. Anyways, sorry if the fight scene isn't the best, I myself am not the best at writing them. Enjoy!
Story Go!
"I see that my reputation precedes me," chuckled Zabuza, "I was hoping that the Demon Brother's would be able to take care of the bridge builder, but with you on the team, I guess it was only wishful thinking. I expected nothing less from Kakashi of the Sharingan."
At the mention of his family's famed doujutsu, Sasuke shot a disbelieving glance at his sensei.
'I thought me and Itachi were the sole Uchiha survivors!' Sasuke was incredulous, 'Is Kakashi-sensei somehow related to me?'
Zabuza was an intimidating man, clad only in pants like a budding exhibitionist with a mask that covered the lower part of his face. Stood upon his excessively large sword that was obviously compensating for something, he was a sight to make any person shit themselves.
"What are we waiting for? Let's get him!" yelled Naruto, running towards the tall man on the oversized cutting utensil. He was, however, stopped by his sensei's arm.
"You'd only get in the way, Naruto. Zabuza is on a whole other level," Kakashi said, "Ex-leader of Kirigakure's Assassination Squad and ex-ANBU, he would destroy you in mere seconds."
"Well, fuck," Naruto cursed.
"Fuck indeed," Zabuza chuckled, "You should listen to your sensei, little shrimp."
"Yea, yea- Wait a damn second, who the fuck are you calling a shrimp?!" After many days of being on the short end of every height joke, Naruto had had enough and cracked, the fact that Zabuza could tear him a new asshole in a matter of seconds completely forgotten. "Mother fucker, I will plant my foot so far up your goddamn ass, that the next time you get a prostate exam, your doctor will find my fucking skid marks! I will-" Here, Naruto went off in tangents, describing the many ways and objects that he'd be cramming into Zabuza's diverse holes with great gusto and detail. Zabuza merely zoned him out and focused his attention on Kakashi.
"Who's the kid, Kakashi? I didn't think Konoha to be the type of village to weigh down their jonin," Zabuza commented.
"He's part of my genin team," Kakashi replied, "But enough about him, your business lies with me."
"Indeed it does," Zabuza said, before disappearing from his post, his sword gone with him.
"-I will shit fury down your throat!" Naruto finished his long narrative of the various manners he'd be introducing what seemed to be half a kitchen into Zabuza's fleshy cavities, "Hey, where'd he go!"
Naruto didn't have the best observational skills.
"I was hoping not to have to use this..." Kakashi sighed, pulling back his forehead protector to reveal his usually hidden eye. It was red in colour, with three tomoe circling the pupil. This was the Sharingan, Konohagakure's most feared doujutsu, or at least it used to be before the extermination of the Uchiha clan. With its ability to analyze, copy and store ninjutsu, taijutsu, and genjutsu, it was truly a weapon to be feared.
"Kakashi-sensei? How did you get Sasuke's clan's bloodline?" Sakura asked.
"Now's not the time to be explaining things," Kakashi brusquely replied, "Manji formation! Now! Protect the client at all costs!"
The three genin quickly jumped next to Tazuna, who looked quite terrified. Understandable of course, it wasn't every day that you had a supposed demon thirsting for your blood like some demented vampire bat, ex-wives not withstanding.
A thick fog had settled around them, obscuring their view and rendering visibility moot. They could barely see three feet in front of them. A voice resonated from every direction, making it impossible to tell where it originated from, "Using the Sharingan so early in battle, Kakashi? I'm honoured. But will it be enough, I wonder."
A pressure suddenly appeared, pressing down on them from all sides. It filled the genin with dread, images of their imminent deaths appeared in their minds. They felt hopeless and despaired, Sasuke was the one most affected by it.
'What's the use?' he thought, 'We can't win, he's too strong!'
He palmed a kunai and prepared to disembowel himself like some sort of samurai that brought dishonour upon his cow.
Right before he could do the deed, a voice cut through the silence, "Sasuke, snap out of it! He's using killing intent to unnerve you guys, but as long I'm here, you'll be fine!" their sensei said.
"Will they really, Kakashi? You can't protect them all," said the disembodied voice of Zabuza, seeming to emanate from all around them, "Unfortunately, your precious doujutsu is useless in these conditions. My fog is too thick for you to pierce. G-" Zabuza was cut off by unreasonably colossal explosion that shook the earth that they stood upon.
"Oh yea? Then what about explosive tags, fuckwad?!" was Naruto's cry, he seemed to be unaffected by Zabuza's killing intent.
"I like you kid, you have spunk," Zabuza said, "I think I'll kill you last."
"Oh happy day!" Naruto replied, "An eyebrowless nutcase with self-esteem issues has taken a liking to me!"
"But the problem with you is that you don't know when to stop talking," Zabuza said, his voice suddenly right next to Naruto's ear, "I'm going to kill every single one of your teammates, slowly and painfully, and I will make you watch every second of it. I will rip out that presumptuous tongue of yours and ram it up your ass, and then I'll torture you at my own leisure, letting you bask in the exquisite pain."
Now, Naruto was beyond terrified. He was in fact, shitting himself. So much so that if you were to strap him to a chair and spin him around, he'd become something akin to a shit sprinkler, or perhaps a shit fountain.
After all, it wasn't everyday that you had a grown man whisper in your ear that he was going to make you suffer like some sort of unhinged, incredibly fucked up girlfriend named Jeanne who just wouldn't leave you alone even after you filed a lawsuit and several restraining orders. But Naruto knew that if he showed that fear, Zabuza would cut him down instantly, so instead of expelling his bowels unceremoniously onto the ground, he replied with a single word.
"Kinky."
Zabuza snapped, "Die!" he roared.
Appearing right in the midst of Team Seven, his sword already swinging to take Naruto's head off. The blond closed his eyes and awaited his gruesome end, but the clang of metal upon metal caused him to open his eyes. In front of him, blocking the Swordsman's weapon with only a kunai and proving that size, in fact, didn't matter, was Kakashi.
"Your fight's with me, Zabuza," he growled.
"I guess if I want to get to the brat, I'll have to finish you off then," the opposite of Gai in eyebrowed-magnificience growled.
Kakashi suddenly lunged forwards, stabbing his opponent in the gut with a kunai in his other hand.
Zabuza widened his eyes before dissipating into a puddle of water.
'A water clone!' Kakashi thought, 'Then the real one must be...'
"Right behind you," finished Zabuza, sword already buried deep into the other man's neck. He was surprised when he felt no resistance until his enemy also turned into a puddle of water. He felt the cold blade of a kunai on his throat.
"To copy my technique so quickly is impressive. As expected of 'The Man Who Copied Over a Thousand Techniques'," Zabuza commented.
Kakashi's reply was merely slitting his opponent's throat, again. It turned out that that one was a clone, again. Before the battle could devolve into a cluster fuck of water clones, Zabuza launched Kakashi into the lake that was nearby before jumping onto the surface of the water.
Kakashi surfaced from the lake, struggling to tread the water, 'This isn't ordinary water, it's too thick, like syrup!' Kakashi thought, but it was too late.
"You fool," said Zabuza, "You've sealed your fate."
Quickly forming several hand signs, he called out, "Suiton Release: Water Prison no Jutsu!"
A sphere of water rose up from the lake and surrounded Kakashi, effectively trapping him.
'Shit!' Kakashi cursed, 'I can't escape!'
"There's no use trying to escape, Kakashi. The sphere's walls are as strong as steel," Zabuza informed him, "And now to take care of your pesky little genin."
"Water release: Water Clone no Jutsu!" he cried, calling forth 4 clones that surged out of the water.
They stood in front of Team Seven and one started to mock them, "Foolish children. You run around playing ninja when you don't even know what that entails. When I was your age, my hands were already soiled with the blood of many," the clone spoke in a low growl.
"Wha- What?" stuttered Sakura.
"Run, you stand no chance against him! His clones can only go so far away from their master! Take the bridge builder and go!" Kakashi yelled from his prison.
"Not a chance, Kakashi-sensei! That option was thrown out the window ever since shit hit defcon fucking zero!" Naruto hollered back.
Naruto formed a hand sign and called out his signature technique, "Shadow Clone no Jutsu!"
20 clones popping into existence. "Get 'em boys!" he commanded. His small army of clones quickly doggy piled on one of Zabuza's own clone.
"Naruto, what are you doing?!" yelled Sakura.
"What does it look like, Sakura? I'm attacking the enemy! Carpe Diem! Seize the day!" Naruto answered, before joining the fray. His clones were quickly taken care of, but Zabuza was clearly having trouble with the real Naruto.
As Naruto engaged the man in a fierce taijutsu battle where his focus were the man's baby nuggets, one of the remaining three clones started to sneak up on the blond. Just before he could strike with his sword, he was forced to jump back as a giant fireball struck the spot where he was standing mere moments ago.
"I can't let you do that," Sasuke grunted before running at the surprised Zabuza clone. The doppelganger dodged some shuriken that were thrown his way.
"Is that all you got kid?" he snickered.
Sasuke merely replied by yanking on the threads that he had tied to the throwing stars, ensnaring his target and rendering him immobile.
"What?!"
"Katon release: Great Fireball no Jutsu!" Sasuke yelled and the clone knew no more.
One of the remaining clones headed off towards Sakura and Tazuna.
Sakura almost panicked, but steeled herself at the last moment, 'No! I am a kunoichi from Konohagakure! I can do this!'
Zabuza was surprised to find a fist meeting his face as he speed towards the bridge builder. It didn't have enough strength to dispel him, but it was enough to phase him.
"I'm impressed, Kakashi. Your brats aren't half bad," Zabuza complimented.
Kakashi didn't answer, opting to continue watching the battle.
Team Seven's training really shone through that day. Naruto and Sakura were able to hold their own against an opponent many times above their skill level. It also helped that the clones only held one tenth of Zabuza's strength and underestimated their power.
Naruto and Sakura eventually dispelled their opponents with well placed attacks to the yam bags. Naruto with his Buster Tag, and Sakura with a good old fashioned foot.
The last clone was regarding them with a bored look upon his face.
"Are you done?" he addressed them, "Well then, now it's my turn."
He blurred towards Naruto and Sasuke, who were grouped together, Sakura having retreated back to protect Tazuna.
He indiscriminately laid waste, kicking both their asses seven ways to Sunday. Feet, arms, fists, nary an appendage was spared in the severe application of the can of whoop ass that Zabuza had just opened.
The duo were thrown back, beaten bloody and groaning. Just because he was one tenth of his actual strength didn't mean he couldn't beat the ever loving shit out of them.
"You little fools," he growled, "And you call yourselves shinobi? When I was your age, I had already taken my first life. My graduation exam was-" here he started monologuing, something about how he killed a whole Academy class, bathed in their blood and probably finger blasted himself at the sight of it. All very interesting stuff, but what was really interesting was the conversation Sasuke and Naruto were having.
"We can't win against the guy, he's too strong!" Naruto cursed.
"I don't suppose you have a plan, dobe?" Sasuke asked in an astounding display of the ability to speak in more than monosyllabic sentences
Naruto thought for a second, "As a matter of fact, I do!"
He threw Sasuke one of his scrolls, "Find me a fuma shuriken while I distract Zabuza!" he exclaimed. Before Sasuke could ask why shouldn't he go distract the man while Naruto found what he wanted, the blond had already speed off towards the still monologuing sword-toting maniac.
"Why the fuck is a fuma shuriken in a scroll labelled 'Things That Go Boom?" Sasuke grumbled, quickly unsealed the contents of the seal, releasing one terrified looking and slightly smoking chicken in the process. As Naruto distracted Zabuza with his fleshy body to act as a punching back, he rummaged through the various shit that Naruto had deemed absolutely necessary to the mission, a kitchen sink being one of them. After throwing away several objects of increasing absurdity, he finally found what he was looking for.
"Naruto! I got it!" he yelled.
"It's about damn time!" replied a very bloody Naruto, who was having his shit kicked in spectacularly. He disengaged himself from his 'fight' if it could be called that, and retreated to Sasuke's side.
"So, what's the plan, dobe?" Sasuke enquired.
"Just watch, fuck-flaps," he replied before slinging the fuma shuriken at Zabuza.
"You really think you can hit me, little shrimp?" the clone taunted as the novelty sized shuriken flew towards him, but was surprised when it veered off course, curving around him. Naruto hadn't been aiming for Zabuza, he was aiming for Zabuza! The real one, that is.
"So it was me you were aiming for," Zabuza said, "It matters not, you are still weak."
He caught the shuriken with little effort, but was startled to see another one heading towards him. It had been hiding in the shadow of the first one.
"Tch," Zabuza tch'ed, preparing to jump over the projectile. He was, however, taken by surprise when right in front of him, the shuriken disappeared in a cloud of smoke. In its place was a Naruto, who slammed crotch first into his face.
"Wha-?" was Zabuza's muffled question.
"Sup!" was the blond's bubbly greeting before exploding magnificently.
The rogue ninja was thrown back from the force of the explosion, his hold on the Water Prison no Jutsu broken.
Kakashi fell into the water, the sphere of water taking the brunt of the explosion.
"Good job, Naruto, Sasuke!" he called out after he surfaced, "And you too, Sakura! You all did spectacularly!"
"I'm going to kill that brat," growled Zabuza with singed hair and clothing. What little amount of eyebrows he had were singed off. He prepared to throw the fuma shuriken in his hands but was stopped by the hand of Kakashi.
"Your fight lies with me, Zabuza Momochi," Kakashi said with narrowed eyes, "Now that I've seen your technique, I won't be falling for it twice!"
He knocked the weapon from his opponent's hand and both jumped back. Zabuza started to form a long sequence of hand signs, with Kakashi copying his every movement.
"Suiton Release: Water Dragon Bullet no Jutsu!" they intoned at the same time. From the lake burst forth two immense dragons composed of water. The two water serpents coiled together, clashing against one another in a battle of the titans. Under them, their summoners were also having a heated battle, Zabuza attacking with his sword, the Kubikiribocho, and Kakashi with a trusty kunai. As the two dragons nullified one another, Kakashi and Zabuza were also in a standstill, blades locked together.
They once again jumped back, landing a few feet away from their opponent. As Zabuza started to form yet again a series of hand signs, he noticed that Kakashi was perfectly mirroring his actions.
'How is he doing that? It's almost as if he knows what I'm...' Zabuza thought.
"Going to do next?" Kakashi finished.
Zabuza was taken aback, and even as he continued doing his hand signs, he couldn't shake off this foreboding feeling. When he glanced at Kakashi's person, he saw behind him a figure. A figure that resembled himself. Shocked by what he had seen, he slowed his speed. That was all that Kakashi needed.
"Water Release: Water Hurricane no Jutsu!" he cried out. A vortex of water rose up from the lake, swirling around Kakashi before being propelled at tremendous speeds towards Zabuza.
'Impossible!' Zabuza thought even as he was swept off his feet like a puppy in front of a firehose, 'I was about to create a Water Hurricane!'
In the water jutsu, Zabuza was being battered and bruised, thrown against the ground and various trees numerous times.
The attack finally abated, hurling him full force onto a tree. Four kunai greeted his arrival, pinning his limbs to the tree. Kakashi shunshined in front of his opponent.
"H-How?" Zabuza shakily asked, "Can you see the into the future?"
"Yes, I can, and you don't exist in it," Kakashi coldly answered, preparing to throw a kunai into the man's heart.
Right before he could deal the killing blow, two senbon needles impaled themselves into the fallen man's neck, killing him instantly.
Kakashi looked around wildly for the person who threw the weapons. He need not look far, for a figure stood upon a tree branch, looking down on him.
"I'm terribly sorry to have stolen your kill, shinobi-san," the newcomer addressed Kakashi, "It's just that I have been tracking down Zabuza Momochi for several days, and I wanted to make certain he wouldn't get away."
"Its... Not a problem," Kakashi answered, wary of the unknown shinobi, "Judging by your appearance, you're a hunter-nin of Kirigakure."
"You are indeed correct."
The newly identified hunter-nin was clad in long robes, a mask adorned his face with the symbol for Kirigakure on the forehead.
"Sakura, what's a hunter-nin?" Naruto discreetly asked the girl from the sidelines.
"A hunter-nin, as you should know if you hadn't skipped every single Academy class, is an elite shinobi of a village, tasked with the mission of hunting down missing-nin from their village and disposing of their bodies to prevent village secrets from leaking out," the pinkette answered.
"Oh."
Kakashi walked up to Zabuza's corpse and felt for a pulse. Finding none, he walked to his team, thinking to himself, 'If I go by his height and voice, I'd say he's around Naruto's age. But to be so young and to already possess such a high level of skill... Whoever this person is, they're no ordinary kid.'
The Hunter-nin jumped off from his perch, picking up the body, "Now, if you would excuse me, I need to get rid of the remains." He disappeared in a swirl of leaves.
"Glad that's over!" Naruto exclaimed, before shrieking as his sensei collapsed right in front of him.
"Is the shit storm over?" Kakashi asked, exhausted from using the Sharingan for such a long period of time.
"I think it is, it's more of a shit drizzle now," Naruto replied.
And done! Sorry for the short delay and chapter. I'm sorry if the fight scene wasn't the greatest, as I said, I have no talent for that sort of thing. That's why I focus on humour mostly. I apologize if this chapter seems a bit rushed, I wanted to give you guys something this week and not make you wait a month for an update, so I may end up rewriting this chapter (probably not). The chapter might've gotten more serious near the end, but that's because I felt like it fit the atmosphere. On a side note, we just hit 40k words! Hot damn! Someone said they were afraid I had abandoned this story, and worry not, unless I die in a glorious orgy involving several women, I will be continuing this story even if people stop reading this! I'd like to thank everyone who read, reviewed, favourited and followed this story, it means a lot. Leave a review, don't, I can't be bothered with telling you how to do you. Author, out!