Just Keeps Comin' Back

The funny thing about new beginnings is that they always carry unrealistic expectations. From when we were kids we'd thing about the first day of school and say "this will be the best year ever." We end the year wondering why we thought that and think, "Next year will be better.". We are wrong again and still we make the same promise to ourselves year after year. It seems that even as adults we are no better. A new place will not remove your past or bring better luck, that's just life. Yet still I think, perhaps tomorrow will be better.

Quinn stood shocked for a moment. She had read all kinds of signals wrong as she stood there in front of Owen and his girlfriend, "Hey, it's nice to meet you. Are you a surgeon here too? " Quinn asked reaching out to shake Amelia's hand.

"Yeah, I'm a Neuro surgeon." Amelia responded with a smile.

of course you are. Quinn thought to herself. "I'm the new pediatric fellow under Dr. Karev." Quinn responded coolly. "Wait, Neuro surgeon... You wouldn't happen to be the Dr. Shepard on the Cochran case? "

"Actually,that was me... Why, did you know her?"

"Me? No, I just met her in the ER." Quinn replied looking down at the ground.

"Well Owen said you were joining its for drinks. No need for us to stand out in the cold right? Let's get going." Amelia suggested.

Quinn shook her head, "You know what, today was actually a long day and its just now getting to me. I think I'm going to head home." Quinn waved and walked away to her car. As she drove to the hotel she was staying at, she suddenly realized how much she missed having friends to talk to. It would be awhile before she could get that here. Everyone already seemed so close and here she was driving home to drink a bottle of wine alone.

Quinn got to her hotel room and got comfortable before opening up a bottle of wine and turning on a cheesy reality to show to watch. She bit her lip thinking about how much she had missed of Beth's life. That got her too thinking about someone she hadn't spoken to in years. Quinn picked up her phone and dialed the number hoping that he hadn't changed it.

After a few rings someone answered. "This is Noah."

"Noah... Hey, um... It's Quinn."

"Fabray?"

"That's the one," Quinn laughed, "I'm sure I'm the last person you wanna hear from, but I had to talk to you... I'm a pediatric surgeon in Seattle now-"

"Did you call to brag?" he laughed bitterly.

"Oh, no I just.. I was in the ER and Beth came in. Our Beth. There was a bus accident on a school field trip and well, she had surgery but is doing well now. I only saw her for a few minutes but she is beautiful Puck... So grown up. She looks a lot like you. I didn't see much of her because of our agreement with Shelby... It hurt so much not to be there by her side after everything. It was like a miracle that she walked in there out of all the places in the world." Quinn's voice cracked as tears started to fall down her cheeks.

Puck was silent on the other line.

"Puck?" Quinn wimpered softly. "Noah? I need you. Please."

"Quinn-" he paused, choking back a sob. "Quinn I can't do this... I'm- I'm married... I have a family now. I love Beth, I always will. But Quinn, I can't relive the past with you. It took me a long time to get over us and be happy again. Please don't take that from me. I have to go. Don't call this number again."

The line went dead. Quinn sobbed heavily staring at the blank phone screen. Now she really was alone.

On her next shift, Quinn was adamant about just focusing on work and trying to not think about how alone she was in Seattle. Everything in her body was screaming at her to just give up and go back to Connecticut. However, she picked up the tablet on the nurses station and looked through the cases that she had to go over with Dr. Karev as soon as he got here.

Distracted by her reading she jumped when Alex came up behind her, "Hey Quinn, I brought you some coffee. I just ordered what you got last time." He laughed handing her a cup.

"Thank you so much." Quinn smiled, "I really appreciate that."

"It's no problem. Ready for the day?"

"As ready as I'll ever be" Quinn replied as they headed off to the first room. Quinn pulled up the chart as they walked into the room.

"Good Morning Beth, I'm Dr. Karev, this is Dr. Fabray... How are you feeling today?" Alex asked going to preform a neural exam on her.

Quinn froze and looked up from the tablet to stare into her own hazel eyes. Her eyes immediately darted over to Beth's bedside where Shelby Cochran sat. "Excuse me, I- just excuse me." Quinn ducked her head and exited the room as quick as possible. She sank down against the wall with her head in her hands and waited for Alex to come back out of the room. She thought about just leaving in order to avoid questions, but it was too late.

"Hey Fabray what the hell was that?" Alex's nice voice was long gone and he stared down at her annoyed. "You can't just leave a patient's room Dr. Fabray."

"You do if you'll get arrested for standing in it." Quinn sighed.

"Wait what?"

"It's a long story."

"Well you better start talking or I'm going to let the Chief know what the hell is going on." Alex snapped, "Lets go finish rounds. We'll talk at lunch." He finished and walked off to the next room.

Quinn stood and followed him into the next patient's room making sure to do everything that she was supposed to. She was a good doctor and she refused to let her past ruin that for her now. She had worked way too hard to get a job at this hospital with these amazing surgeons.

When they finished rounds Alex turned to Quinn, "Well?"

"Listen Alex... this is really personal so I'm not going to tell you in the middle of the hallway where just anyone can hear-" Alex didn't let her finish and pulled her into the closest on call room.

"Talk." He demanded. "We're a team and I can't have someone with a bunch of secrets being the person that's supposed to back me up in the OR."

"I get it," Quinn took a deep breath. "When I was sixteen, I got pregnant. That patient in there is my daughter Beth. I let Shelby, who is a friend's biological mother, adopt her. I had to sign all of my rights away. Rights to see her, everything. I was too young to negotiate this and my parents wanted to act like it never happened so I got nothing. My senior year I may have gone a little insane, cut my hair and dyed it pink, started smoking, all that. Then I found out that Noah, the father of my baby, was getting to see her even though he'd signed away his rights too. That convinced me to clean up really quick. Dyed my hair back to blonde, started wearing my cross necklace and girly dresses again before I asked Shelby if I could see her. One night Shelby let Noah and I babysit."

Quinn drew another breath knowing that this could get her in a lot of trouble, "I tried to frame Shelby as an unfit mother so that I could get Beth back. Seeing how much of her life that I got nothing to do with killed me. So Shelby found out and she said that if I ever got within fifty feet of her or Beth again she'd press charges, file a restraining order, anything she could to ruin my life."

She paused, "I didn't know what to do. So I made sure to stay away and I really kept myself busy. I came back from that and made myself someone that she could be proud to have as a mother, even if she doesn't ever know who I am. Then she walked into the ER and I have no idea what to do because I can't be around her or say anything to her or anyone else. I love my daughter and I am glad Shelby gave her a good life, but there isn't a day that I don't wonder what it would be like to have had raised her myself. So, I had to walk out of that room Dr. Karev, but I am not a bad person for doing so."

Alex listened intently as she spoke. Her voice was calm and steady even as tears threatened to spill out of her eyes onto her cheeks. He wasn't quite sure what to say to all that when she finished. The standard 'I'm sorry' seemed beyond cliche. So instead he reached out and hugged her tightly. He felt her tiny body shake in his arms as she sobbed into his shoulder. "It's okay Quinn." He pulled back, holding her at arms length, "Listen. Tonight, we're going out for drinks. I'm not taking no for an answer. Alcohol may not solve your issues but everyone's got a past and alcohol sure does make you forget it."

Quinn laughed and wiped at her tears, "Thank you Alex... and I'm sorry for unloading all that on you. I haven't talked about that in like ten years so thank you for letting me vent and for not judging me."

"Who am I to judge?" He smiled a little, "Come on, lets go. We have surgery."

That evening, Quinn changed out of her navy scrubs into a pair of jeans and a flowing white top with white flats. She let down her hair, her soft curls falling around her face. She packed away all of her things into her bag and turned to see a shirtless Alex still getting changed. She couldn't help but stare a little. He was sexy. She felt a blush creep to her cheeks and quickly turned away, "I'll just wait for you outside." Quinn called out exiting the attending's lounge.

Inside, Dr. Avery turned to Alex, "Who's that?"

"New pediatric fellow." Alex replied simply.

"She's pretty... and that's the first time I've ever seen a girl gawk at you while I was changing right next to you." Jackson smirked. He and April weren't together, so he couldn't help but look at the new doctor and be a little jealous when it seemed she had eyes for only Alex. "You two going somewhere?"

"Uh yeah I'm taking her to Joe's, getting her into the usual stuff we do."

"Oh cool, can I come?" Jackson asked.

Alex slipped on his t-shirt and smirked picking up his bag, "Nope."

Quinn saw Alex exit and smiled brightly, "Ready to go?" She asked.

"Yeah, it's right across the street. I'll drive." He offered.

Once at the bar, Quinn took in the atmosphere around her. There were people sitting at the bar drinking and talking, a bachelor party was going on over in a corner, some people were playing darts, others playing pool. The place seemed to packed for a week night. "So this is where everyone hangs out?" Quinn asked turning to look over at Alex.

"Yeah, when we're not on call of course. We all come here to unwind and just talk. It started my intern year. This is actually where my friend Meredith met Derek, her husband." Alex smiled a little

"Really?" Quinn raised an eyebrow, it seemed impossible that someone could find a stable relationship in this dirty bar, but who was she to judge. Clearly it was possible, just not likely. They both walked up to the bar and ordered drinks. Quinn ordered a beer along with Alex and they found two empty bar stools on the side of the bar to sit down at.

"So." Quinn took a sip of her beer, "I told you my life story today... do I get to hear yours?"

Alex laughed and shook his head, "Not much to it. Crazy mom, alcoholic dad. Somehow I got out and became a decent human being." He smirked.

"Hey I get the alcoholic dad thing. I had one too. Very controlling and probably made my mom crazy." Quinn nudged him with a smile, an attempt to keep the mood light. "Alright, so I know this is stupid but I have to ask because I know it's happening... Who is with who at the hospital because when I'm ready to date, I'm definitely not stepping on anyone's toes."

"Guys or girls?" Alex teased with a smile.

"Guys" Quinn laughed.

"Alright well Amelia Shepard and Owen Hunt are dating," Quinn nodded and took another drink as he continued, "Jackson Avery was married to April Kepner but they're currently divorced. However, I'd say their little relationship status should read "its complicated". Um... Dr. Weber is married to Avery's mom... Dr. Warren is married to the Chief of Surgery, Dr. Deluca is single, and as far as I know so is Dr. Riggs."

"What about you?" Quinn asked casually.

"Well, I was married actually. I really did care about her, we rushed into things because she had cancer... then she left me, but after that I was in a relationship with this girl Jo, she went to another hospital close by, but well... I asked her to marry me and she said no." Alex shrugged and took a long drink of his beer.

"Oh... I'm really sorry." Quinn placed a hand on his arm as an effort of comfort which he made no move to brush off.

He shrugged again, "Shit happens. So, what about you? Whats your love life been like since all the baby drama?"

Quinn laughed awkwardly, "I am ashamed to admit that I haven't had a good relationship because all of the guys I tried to date treated me like a fling. For awhile I thought I deserved it, but now I think I'm opening up to the idea of deserving a steady relationship, marriage, kids... all that." Quinn paused, "But hey, that's pretty heavy and we're having a good time right?" Quinn ordered another beer from the bartender and so did Alex.

A few more drinks in, and just a few hours later Quinn and Alex were stumbling out of the bar cracking up at jokes that weren't even funny and attempting to drunkenly find the car. "We should really just call an Uber... we are way too drunk to find the car and way too drunk to drive." Alex suggested. Quinn agreed.

In the car the driver asked where to and Quinn stated the name of the hotel she was staying in. Alex was drunk, but when he heard hotel somehow he still got nervous. Was Quinn making this a one night stand? As if she'd read his mind she turned to him, "I'm living there till I get a place. Don't get any funny ideas".

They arrived at the hotel and Quinn got out waving goodbye to Alex as he headed to Meredith's where he was staying in the process of moving out of his and Jo's place. When he walked in, Meredith was sitting on the couch with Amelia and Maggie talking. "Hey" he waved coming in the door, "I'm gonna need a ride to work tomorrow." He stated.

"Are you drunk?" Meredith asked getting up to stop him before he got to his room, "Where were you?"

"I was at Joe's."

"Drinking alone?" Maggie chimed in. Her high pitched voice was giving him a headache.

He sighed, "No I was with Quinn Fabray."

"That new peds fellow?" Amelia seemed excited. Alex nodded, "She's cute."

"So wait... you went out drinking with a girl you like and didn't bring her home?" Meredith raised an eyebrow knowing his habits for the last few weeks after Jo and before Quinn arrived at Grey Sloan.

"Wait- you like her?" Maggie squealed.

Alex put a hand to his head, "Can we stop pretending we're in high school and Can I go to bed?"

"Alright, we'll leave you alone." Meredith smiled and let him go giving him a knowing look to which he just rolled his eyes.

The next morning Alex rode to work with the three girls who pestered him with questions the whole way. He assumed it distracted him from whatever was going on in their lives so he let them ask even though there was nothing to tell. He'd had a goodnight with a friend. There was nothing more to it than that... Unfortunately. As he walked in he ran into Quinn waiting on the elevator, "Hey! You made it into work." She smiled.

He immediately smiled back, "Yeah I'm not a lightweight like you. I'm surprised that you're even standing up right now." He teased.

Quinn rolled her eyes, "I'm a surgeon, I think I can cure my own hangover." She rolled her eyes as they stepped onto the elevator together.

Quinn and Alex stepped off the elevator together onto the peds floor after getting coffee and dropping their bags off in the attending's lounge. It seemed that they were becoming quickly inseparable.

"Hey I'm gonna go discharge that appendectomy from yesterday, I'll be back." Quinn smiled and headed off in the other direction.

Just as Alex was looking through his charts another blonde entered his vision, "Hey Arizona" Alex greeted.

"So who's your new friend?" She asked with her usual giant smile.

"That's the new peds fellow."

"Yeah, I know that. I helped pick her. You two seem awfully close already." She commented.

"Maybe... we had a couple drinks, she's easy to talk to... She's like you except she likes guys." Alex replied gruffly.

Arizona sighed, "You're so difficult, if you like her just ask her out."

"It's not that simple."

"Yes it is. Do it now here she comes." Arizona gave Alex a shove forward as Quinn approached the nurses station again.

"Hey, so that patient looks great. Everything is healing, no fevers so I went ahead and discharged him."

"Great, thanks." He grit his teeth when Arizona discreetly kicked him from where she was standing, "So... Quinn I was wondering if you weren't busy tonight if-"

I kept thinking about how we lie when we say "This is going to be the best yet..." but maybe I'm not lying when I say this is going to be the best job yet, the best hospital, the best fresh start. I wasn't coming here looking for anything other than something new and good friends. This was it. This is what I needed a clean slate and a past that wasn't judged.

Alex's sentence was interrupted by a small voice behind Quinn, "Mom?"

Beth.