Reno and Elena walked hand in hand towards the Shinra building. Bathed in the glow of Meteor, their place of employment looked eerily romantic on this dark night.

Elena sighed, leaning on Reno's shoulder. "Thanks for taking me to see 'Loveless,' Reno, she sighed, giving his arm a squeeze.

"Ah, it was nothing," he said proudly. "After all you've been through, you deserve the best."

Elena looked over at the guy who was holding her hand tightly. He'd proved himself to be so understanding, when, a little shaken by the brutal murder of her boss and boyfriend, Tseng, he offered her a shoulder to cry on. He never told anyone how he'd once locked himself in the boardroom with Elena and a box of tissues, or that he'd paid 300 Gil to get her a taxi home one other time she felt really low, and had told Rufus she didn't feel well.

Elena had been very grateful for all this attention, and their friendship had turned into something a little more. He'd actually kissed her whilst they were in the theatre. She'd felt a little surprised that Reno should kiss her in the first place, but kind of glad. She always thought he was sweet, with his scruffy red hair and perpetually wrinkled uniform.

"Hey, Elena," Reno whispered passionately. "Over here." He led her into a nearby phone booth. "Come on. I have a really naughty idea."

Elena looked worried. "Reno," she hissed, "that's a PUBLIC phone box! Someone will see!"

Reno burst out laughing. "Such a filthy mind you have, Elena," he chortled. "Who cares if people see us making a phone-call." He lifted the receiver and listened for the dialling tone. Dropping a few Gil into the slot, he dialled Heidegger's office number. He leaned close to Elena so she could hear the reaction.

"Ye-es, this is Heidegger, head of Public Safety Maintenance," came his pompous introductory spiel. "How may I help you?"

"Yuh," Reno said, putting on a daft voice which made Elena laugh. "I just wondered if you could put me through to someone. A Mr. Cox, first name Everard."

Elena clamped a hand to her mouth to stop herself from laughing.

"Hmmm…" Heidegger said thoughtfully. "Everard Cox? Can't say I've heard…"

"Really, Heidegger," Reno said, in his normal voice. "That's not what I've heard from Scarlet!"

Elena couldn't help laughing.

"RENO!" Heidegger shouted, livid. "I'll have you know that Scarlet is very sensitive and understanding about my small impotence problem…"

This got Reno started. He laughed so hard that he could hardly breathe, and the tears gushed down his cheeks.

"STOP THAT LAUGHING!" an angry voice shouted from down the other end of the phone. "IT'S NOT FUNNY!"

Laughing too hard to say anything else, Reno replaced the receiver.

Convulsing with giggled herself, Elena buried her head in Reno's cosy jacket. It just felt so good to cut loose and have a laugh with a mate, especially if that mate happened to fancy her.

"Ohh dear!" Reno sighed joyously, pressing his forehead to the glass panel of the call box, one arm around Elena's shoulder's. He glanced over at the Shinra building's entrance. All at once he saw a figure in an unusually dishevelled white suit, with a cute girl in a revealing dress on his arm. That was funny. If Scarlet was so understanding about her ageing lover's inability to perform, why was she sticking her tongue down President Rufus' throat?

Elena looked up, still giggling. "Oh, look," she chirped. "It's Rufus the Doofus and Scarlet the Harlot!"

Reno covered his mouth to stop himself from laughing any more. He led Elena by the hand out of the phone booth and, quite accidentally, into the path of the randy President.

Rufus broke off his lingering, passion-filled kiss with Scarlet. He looked contemptuously at the two Turks. Then he smiled a knowing, noticing that they had their fingers intertwined. "What are you two up to?" he asked, teasing them.

Quickly, the pair dropped hands. Reno cleared his throat. "Erm… nothing," he said. "What- what about you?"

Rufus moved his hand from Scarlet's right breast onto her shoulder. "Er… I was going to give Scarlet a lift home." He tapped her shoulder to prompt her into saying something.

"Yeah," Scarlet said sulkily. "Heidegger's working late."

"We know," Elena chipped in. "We just crank-called him from the phone-box, di'n't we, Reno?"

Reno sighed. Elena was always giving stuff away like that. Yet this time it didn't really matter. "That's right," he said, putting his arm around her waist and smiling broadly.

Rufus rolled his eyes. "You Turks can be real childish when you want to," he sighed.

"Thanks very much, Mr. President," said Reno, pleased he'd actually got Rufus' permission to hassle staff members. "I'll get right on it."

Rufus tutted. "I didn't mean it like that!" he grumbled. "Come on, Scarlet, let's go." He took his car keys from his pocket and twirled them around his index finger a couple of times, catching them in the palm of his hand.

"Whoo!" Elena cheered. "Wonder where they're off to together?"

"Huh, who cares?" Reno grunted. "Just as long as they… have fun eh?" He nudged Elena and winked at her.

They walked on past the Shinra building and down the road to Wall Market. Reno reached for Elena's cold hand.

"Where are we going" she asked him.

Reno shrugged. "I dunno," he said. "Wherever you wanna go."

Elena sighed sleepily. "Mmm. I am kinda tired," she admitted, resting her cheek on Reno's upper arm. "And it's too far to walk back to my flat."

"Okay, then," Reno said, walking towards the nearby inn. "We'll get a room."

Elena looked at him. "But Reno," she protested, "it's dead expensive around here. Just a night here will cost you an arm and a leg."

Reno smiled and shook his head. "I don't care," he said, kissing Elena's cheek. "I always treat my girlfriends right." He paused. "You will be my girlfriend, huh?"

Elena ignored that and smiled enigmatically to herself.

Reno hugged her tight. "I'll take that as a yes, then, shall I?" he asked.

-----

"Oh, gosh! Rufus!" Scarlet hollered as the breathless president rolled over and landed on the mattress next to her.

"Phew," he panted. "I enjoyed that."

"Me too," Scarlet whispered, resting her head on his chest. "I'll let you into a little secret."

"What's that?" Rufus asked, his hand brushing deliberately against her breasts.

Scarlet smiled coyly. "In all the years I've been sleeping with Heidegger," she admitted, "he's never made me… feel anything like that." She turned red, feeling embarrassed, talking about her sex life. Not that she even had one with Heidegger.

Rufus sniggered. "I always knew he was a useless commodity," he said. "But I didn't know it went as far as the bedroom!"

Scarlet smiled. "It's true, you know!" she said brightly

Rufus twirled a strand of Scarlet's hair around his finger. "What would you do," he began, "if Heidegger walked in on us right now."

Scarlet's soft lips touched Rufus' chest. "First I would tie him to a chair. Then I'd force his eyes open with duct tape and force him to watch us make love." She smiled and nodded, tweaking the President's left nipple.

He sucked in his breath. "Ooooh, I like that," he said. "Voyeurism is a real turn-on."

Scarlet looked up at Rufus in indignation. "Oh!" she exclaimed. "I thought you meant the nipple thing!"

All at once an idea hit Rufus. A sly smile spread across his face, as Scarlet began to suck his nipple.

"Yeah, making 'Degger Dumb-ass watch us is a good idea," he conceded, "but what if we put him out of the picture… permanently?"

Scarlet nuzzled Rufus' neck. "But he is out of the picture. See this message I sent him on the way here?" She groped for her mobile and brought up the message she had written. "Look."

"U R SO DUMPT," Rufus read aloud. "Yeah, that's great. But I meant something… a little more… shall we say… effective? So he'll never bother us again."

Scarlet cottoned on, her eyes growing wide. "Gotcha, Mr. President," she said, winking at him. "But who's gonna do the dirty?"

"Count me out," Rufus said. "I'm way too important to be convicted of murder. Besides, I know the perfect man for the job…" He picked up the cordless hand-set beside his bed.

"You mean Reno?" Scarlet asked. "Should we really be bothering him at this hour? He might be busy right now… with Elena?"

Rufus laughed heartily. "No way," he said. "Elena is far too headstrong to hit on a loser like him."

Scarlet shrugged. "Well… I saw them. He had his hand on her butt, and she seemed to be lovin' it." She smiled and nodded smugly.

Rufus frowned and shook his head. "Naah," he said. "Now, be honest, given the choice, would you get down with Reno… or Heidegger?"

Scarlet thought for a moment. She'd always found Reno quite sweet. He was kinda cute for a 'Turk,' and he'd been a member since he was fifteen, so she'd heard. Wow, she could just squeeze that skinny little body, and run her fingers through his gorgeous, tousled hair.

"Umm, I'd rather have you, Rufie," she answered flatteringly.

Rufus clicked his fingers. "There, you see!" he said. "No one would touch him with yours, mate! I'm gonna phone the lonely little thing up!" He dialled a number. "He'd do anything for a couple of hundred gil anyway."