The ZPD headquarters has become a home away from home for me. A place where I can make amends for my actions those years ago. Of all the things which have happened since then, I can always count on one good thing when I sit down at my desk. Nick.

"Carrots!" Nick calls over my cube and I spin around to see him.

"Oh hey Nick! I'm sorry you had to work overnight again."

I can see how strained he is. "It's fine Hopps. Looks like you should've stayed too with all that paperwork I see." Nick smirks as he points to my neat pile of paper.

"You know you wouldn't be working so much if you'd just not patronize Bogo so much.. Or maybe you should! I bet he'd have you finish everyone's paperwork."

"Hey! He needs to stop setting himself up so much! And you look so happy when you're working all day on reports." Nick jokes.

"Oh yeah?" I grin. "How did Bogo set himself up for this then?"

I grab a photo Nick gave me. It's of Chief Bogo's head on Gazelle's body with the words Where Anyone Can Be Anything! on it. Nick thought it would be a great birthday present for Bogo if all the ZPD had a copy. I can't help but smile. Of all the bad I see, Nick shows me the good of the world, in his own goofy way. Recently, he has been really overworked. Bogo has been at the end of one too many jokes from him. I try to tell Nick to lighten up, but he never listens to me. Some things just never change.

"But Nick, you spend more nights here than at home."

"But there is nothing waiting for me there, at least here I know you will show up each morning." Nick has the nicest grin on his face, but it is short lived. "So, Carrots… are you ok?"

"Of course! Why wouldn't I be?" I say, holding back my feelings.

His face just freezes into seriousness "I know you, Judy. You never were that good at lying. I know what day it is."

"Nick.. now is not the time. I'm sorry. We can talk about this after work if you want. That is, if you want to come over to my new apartment."

"I'd love to. You can tell me anything, Bunny, I'll listen… At any rate, I need to get back to work. Let me know if you need anything." Nick says with a smile as he goes across the office to his cube.

"You know working doesn't include any more Bogo faces!" I yell over my cube to Nick as he saunters off.

Someday he's going to push it too far, but he means well. Bogo can only take so much from him and -beep-

"Huh? What's this? Message from… odd it doesn't say." The title just reads Hello.

From:

Sent: 07:34

To: JHopps

Subject: Hello

Hello Judy. It's nice to see you with a smile on your face today.

"What?" I mutter. "What is going on?" I hit the reply button.

To:

Who is this?

Send.

Error, please specify a recipient

Never in my entire life has something seemed so.. so wrong. I need to take a walk around the office- calm my nerves. It's just some prank. Nothing to be worried about. Nothing. I make my way down to the entryway of the station and sit down on a rock bench. Funny how I always find the area right outside the bullpen. I was so naïve going in there the first time. You know, sometimes, I kind of miss-

"Parking duty!"

"What?" As I fall back into reality I see the Chief.

"Chief! Sorry sir! I was just-"

"Day dreaming again Hopps?" I can see a hint of worry in him.

"Yes sir. Sorry sir." I can't help but feel embarrassed.

"Hopps, you alright? Something seems more off than usual."

The Chief knows the weight I carry. Ever since I resigned and came back, he's known. He never talks about it much, but I know he has more than his fair share of weights on his back.

I try to smile. "I'm alright sir. I, uh, actually sir. Can I go back? Back to Parking Duty? I need to get out today, to clear my head."

"Parking Duty? Hopps, I was just kidding. You're a good officer. Do you need to go home early today?" He has this look in his eyes that he knows. Nothing gets past Bogo.

"No sir. Please, I need to be out there." I plead.

"Alright Hopps. Don't go chasing any weasels this time. You know where to find your old equipment." Chief points to the door I haven't walked through in nearly a year. The door to the Traffic Department.

"Thank you, sir." I choke out.

Being in a menial job is what I need today. I'm sorry Zootopia, but I can't help you at my best, not today. It's just too hard to get past all the bad I've put you through over the last years. I tried to hide it at first, tried to enjoy working with Nick...

We worked together for a better part of a year, Nick and I. We stopped many thefts, and broke up many fights. Our first few cases weren't the result of my actions. The cases were petty crimes, like stealing a pumpkin, or answering an accident call. At times, I really did think my actions were forgiven, forgotten. For a while, it really looked like the hate I brought into the world died with the Night Howlers. How could I have been so foolish?

One day, a few months ago, Nick and I were patrolling downtown. A slower than average day in Zootopia for us, we had just finished lunch and were looking around for anything suspicious.. I learned two things that day. One, any day can go south at any moment. And two, I am responsible. We were driving by a shop at the time, I can't remember the name, but the one thing I can remember is the screaming. We pulled over, ran to see what had happened.

That was the moment. I froze. The moment the festering hate I created took on violence. There was a pig pinned against the shop.. dead. I've never seen a more gruesome sight in my life. His family trying to pry off the car which pulverized him. The driver, a tiger, yelling at the pigs. Screaming of how her son has never been happy since pigs beat him up because he was a predator. Her son was five years old when he was beaten within an inch of his life. The file stated that the pigs didn't want to risk him going savage, that it was claimed to be self defense. I'm so sorry...

I tried. I really tried. Sometimes it was too much, riddled with too much pain. The tiger was just the beginning in a long line of vicious crimes incited by fear or hate, which I created. Nick was the only good part of those days. He gave me hope that we could fix it, hope that we could give some peace to those I affected. He helped me keep the darkness I felt growing inside at bay. Of course he asked me about it at times, but I'd always just shrug it off or just say it was a long day. Today will be different though. After two years I feel like I need a chance to heal. To connect with the optimistic rabbit I once was when I first stepped into the ZPD. Funny. I never thought I'd want to be a Meter Maid again.