Ana
I hope my idea of giving the media what they want wasn't a huge mistake, but I just don't want them to follow me around all the time trying to get a good shot either to confirm the pregnancy or to dismiss the rumor, which of course wouldn't have happened anyway since I'm sure I won't be able to hide my ever growing bump much longer.
I just wish I would have worn something different today. Now, I will look like an idiot wearing black dress pants, nude pumps and a white cotton tank top, but if I put my blue shirt back on my belly won't show, due to the A-line cut of it. I'm not vain or anything, but knowing that my picture is going to be all over the news I would like to look nice, more for Christian than myself. I don't want people to make fun of him for knocking up a girl that isn't anything special and can't even dress properly.
"Shopping service!" I suddenly hear Mia's cheerfully voice as she steps into the waiting area waving several shopping bags in her hand.
"Okay, all the guys have to get out us girls want to play dress up." She announces and I have no idea what is going on until my eyes find Christian's and he winks at me before everyone but Mia leaves the room.
"Did he call you?" I ask and Mia grins.
"He sure did, so I found two dresses for you, which one do you like best?" She asks and holds both of them up for me. One is a nude color with a brown belt right underneath the breasts and the other is a greyish blue shift dress, they are both really pretty, but I pick the blue one as it will go well with the shoes I am wearing. Once I am dressed Mia continues to style my hair into an elegant chignon, before she continues to apply some light make up to my face.
"I don't need make up, Mia."
"Oh you do, Ana. Believe me, those paparazzi don't come with perfect lighting and everything, you want to look your best, because the shot that will pay them the most is the one where your eyes are crossed and you look like an idiot. They are so nasty... just trust me on this, think of it as being some kind of medieval warrior, they painted their face too." She says and I frown.
"Is it that bad?"
"Not all the time, but I had some rather unpleasant experiences with them, it should be my business if I decide to head to supermarket wearing a hoody, yoga pants and no make-up, but it's no fun when you have to see yourself like that all over the tabloids with headlines like "The ugly truth"." She says and I gasp. Mia is gorgeous with or without make up.
"Doesn't matter, I just don't want you to go through that. I'm a tough cookie, but this is new to you, so let's not give them anything to attack you about. I want other women to see you and get pea-green with envy." She says and I giggle.
Ten minutes later Sam steps outside and addresses the media before Sawyer and Ryan open the double doors for Christian and I. On instinct I grab his hand, this is making me really nervous and I need something or someone to hold onto, so I won't run and hide.
Christian looks at our linked fingers, smiles at me and then we step outside together and I am momentarily blinded by all the flashlights going off at once. Christian pulls me to his side and wraps one arm around me, while they take their pictures, but I can see him exchanging looks with Taylor when they start to yell questions at us.
"Miss Steele, how long have you known, Mr. Grey?"
"Is the child really his?"
"Are you the surrogate for Mr. Grey and his boyfriend."
When I hear that last question my head snaps to the photographer who has just yelled that question at us, but I can't make him out in the crowd.
"Ana please tell me you didn't fall for him because of his money!"
I suddenly hear a familiar voice coming from the crowd and sure enough, José is one of the paps. He hasn't been in touch much ever since the accident and now I know why… he is jealous.
"Christian, that was José!" I whisper up to him.
"I know, ignore him… if he was your friend he wouldn't be here trying to make money out of your pregnancy." He says and after another minute we head back inside, but I can see that Taylor is in a rather heated argument with José and a minute later he steps inside with José.
"I can't believe you just did that!" I snap at him.
"Why not, a guy has to earn a living, Ana… but clearly, you have found other means to make a living." He hisses at me disgusted and I feel tears well up in my eyes.
"Mr. Rodriguez, I think it is best for you to leave Anastasia alone. You have clearly proven today that you are not worthy of her friendship." Christian tells him coldly and José laughs arrogantly.
"Well, she has clearly proven that she is not the girl I thought she was… but I bet if I had your bank account she would have been all over my dick too." He says and before I can do or say anything Christian has punched him in the face.
"Men like you disgust me to no end, take that as a warning, you come near Anastasia again and I will make sure that you are miserable for the rest of your life!" Christian hisses and ushers me back to the waiting room, where I sit down just in time for my tears to spill over.
"Hey, don't cry, he is not worth your tears, Ana." Christian says and sits down next to me.
"Oh my god, what happened?" Mia who has waited there for us asks.
"Ana's so called friend Josè was there and said some very inappropriate and upsetting things to her." Christian explains, while I grab my purse to retrieve a tissue.
"I can't believe he would say something like that to me… I'm not like that… I would never…"
"Ana stop, I know that. Believe me, I have met enough women who are just like that to know that you are not that kind of person. Don't allow him to upset you."
"Can we leave please? I don't want to be here anymore." I ask as I dry my tears.
"Sure, let's visit my grandparents." Christian says, he asks Mia to join us, but she is going to meet some friends this afternoon, so it's just us.
In the car I check my phone and nearly drop it when it starts to buzz.
"Ana… OMG have you seen it?" Kate shouts into the phone.
"Seen what Kate?"
"José that slimly little weasel, he posted a blog online just three minutes ago… it's disgusting, I'll send you the link… you need to sue the fucking hell out of him. Is Christian still with you?"
"Yes, we are going to visit his grandparents."
"He needs to read this too… jesus, José is such a delusional piece of shit!"
"I need to read it, please send me the link." I whisper.
"Okay, and Ana, don't allow him to get away with this shit. Love ya." She says and hangs up. Five seconds later my phone signals an incoming text and I just stare at it, not sure I really want to read it.
"Everything alright?" Christian asks.
"No… Jose has written a blog, Kate says it's really bad… she has sent me the link, but I really don't want to read it."
"May I?" He asks so I hand him my phone and watch his expression change into pure anger within seconds. When he has read it completely he takes his phone out sends the link from my phone to his and dials a number.
"Warner it's Grey… I'll send you a link within the next two minutes… I want the blog to be shut down… I don't give a fuck how you do it, just do it, it's nothing but fucking lies… yes, and take legal actions against the writer… keep me updated." He says hangs up and takes my phone from me before I can read the article.
"Don't read that garbage, Ana. It will be off the internet in no time."
"What has he written?"
"It was a short blog, more like a rant, basically he called both of us every name in the book, called you his former girlfriend… said you left him for me and that you are only in it for the money. Don't worry about it, I'm dealing with this shit."
"I don't get it; I have never given José even the tiniest reason to believe we could be more than just friends. Why is he doing this?" I mutter.
"He wants what he can't have and lashes out because of it."
"Men ughhh!" I mutter under my breath, which makes both Christian and Taylor laugh.
Twenty minutes later we arrive at his grandparents' house, Christian grandma is outside putting some potted flowers on the porch when she looks up and sees us.
"Theo! Theo quick, the boy is here!" She calls out and just hearing her referring to Christian as the boy makes me giggle. Next she hurries towards us and grabs Christian's hands.
"How are you sweet boy?"
"I'm fine, thank you, grandma, I'm sorry I haven't called."
"Oh, don't be silly, I know how busy you are and you have this gorgeous girl to take care of." She says and smiles at me.
"How are you sweet girl, it's so nice to see you again… oh look at that, my first great grandchild, may I?" She asks holding her hand out to touch my belly.
"I'm so happy for both of you. Are you better, Ana?"
"Yes, and I need to thank you, Mrs. Trevelyan, the crackers you made for me really helped me with the morning sickness."
"That's good, I'll give you the recipe so you know how to make them with your next baby." She says and Christian looks a bit alarmed.
"Let's get this little one safely into this world before we talk about more kids." He chuckles just as his grandfather joins us.
"Are you going to stand here all day, come in, I'm making grilled cheese for lunch." He says and I'm surprised to hear that he is cooking.
"It's the only dish he can make, but it's delicious." Mrs. Trevelyan says as we had into the house and I look around.
"Oh my gosh, look at that." I giggle as we walk through the hallway which has all the walls filled with pictures and there is one of Christian as a small boy. He is sitting on top of a huge bucket filled with apples, his face is smeared with chocolate and he is smiling like crazy.
"That's my favorite too, but as cute as he looks, this one was a little firecracker as a child." Mrs. Trevelyan says.
"Elliot was worse." Christian mutters under his breath.
"But he wouldn't get caught as much as you did… boys, they always get into trouble." She says with a knowing smile and soon we are all sitting in the kitchen where we have lunch and I even manage a second helping and some pie for dessert, which has Christian smiling like an idiot.
"I told you these days I'm eating a lot." I murmur a bit embarrassed.
"Oh, you should have seen my Gloria when she was pregnant with Gracie and Ben, her stomach turned into a bottomless pit… I swear one Sunday she ate the entire pork roast before I even managed to get anything on my plate." Mr. Trevelyan says making me and Christian laugh while his wife raises an eyebrow at him.
"Well, I for one am happy to see Ana eat, she usually eats like a little bird or forgets to eat all together." Christian says and I want to argue, but he is right, until I found out that I am pregnant I really didn't have the best eating habits.
After visiting his grandparents, we decide to go for a walk in a nearby park and just stroll around for a bit.
"I'm sorry for today, Ana. This was not how I saw the first time we meet after everything that happened went down." He says and I sigh.
"Look, I'm not going to lie and tell you that I don't care if my private life suddenly becomes interesting for the media, but it's not your fault. It's not like you have chosen to become a celebrity or anything like that. So, let's not talk about it." Fact is, I hate that my child will have to grow up with security and paparazzi trying to make a dime by snapping pictures of him, but it's not Christian's fault, so I can't blame him.
"I was thinking about telling my family that we are having a boy, do you want everyone to know?" He asks.
"Yes, how about we tell them all together, Ray wants to drive down to Seattle this weekend, I could cook dinner for everyone and we tell them then… though I'm not sure dining table is big enough for my parents, your entire family and Kate."
"We could invite them all to Escala." He offers and I frown remembering the last time I have been to his place and the many other times it was rather unpleasant for me to be there.
"Can I ask you something… about her?" I ask and he nods.
"Why did you never feel like what she has done to you was wrong?" I ask and he sighs.
"There is an ice cream truck over there. How about we have some ice cream, sit down and talk." He says and when I agree we get ourselves each some ice cream and sit down on a bench by a small lake.
"You know that I don't like to be touched and I know you have noticed the burn marks on my chest and back." He says and I nod, I wanted to ask him about them so many times, but I knew he would be upset if I did.
"Before I was adopted by the Grey's I lived with my birthmother. She was only fifteen when she had me. Her parents kicked her out and she turned to the wrong people for help. She ended up addicted to drugs and sold her body to make a living. We lived in a shithole of an apartment where I had to witness many things no child should ever see. Her pimp… he was abusive not just with her, but with me too. He would kick me around, beat me with his belt and even use me as ashtray… my mother didn't help me, she was too scared of him. She overdosed when I was four and I was locked in the apartment with her body for four days. By the time I was found I was nearly starved to death… she always gave me very little food, so I was already badly malnourished and those four days… let's just say it was hell." He says and feel tears burn in my eyes, this is horrible… he was so little, a baby really and everything he has been through…
"Hey, don't cry… please Ana, I didn't mean to upset you."
"You didn't… I just… that's horrible… was there no one to help you… her… what about her parents?"
"They didn't care, the only good thing they ever did was not wanting to claim me when Ella, my birth mother, passed away. Anyway, after the Grey's adopted me things didn't magically become great for me. I wouldn't talk for nearly two years, I had terrible night terrors, I was really scared of my Dad at first and had the worst tantrums. Things calmed down a little when Mia arrived, she made me talk… she was so innocent and beautiful… I loved my little sister right away. For a while, I felt normal despite my fear of being touched. Things changed though when I turned thirteen and puberty really set in. Elliot was dating every girl he wanted to… I on the other hand couldn't. I was so angry at the time… well more frustrated to be exact. I got into brawls in school got expelled several times and so my parents made me clean Elena's backyard after she had some renovations done. She knew I couldn't bear to be touched and about my insecurities of feeling not worthy of my family. She knew and it gave her an opening to pounce." He says and shakes his head as if he can't believe he didn't see it before.
"At first she kissed me and didn't touch me in doing so… she made me eager to come back for more, which of course I did and when she told me that BDSM was a way to better myself, to learn how to be in control and to become worthy of my family, I believed her. I thought I deserved each punishment she dished out… believed her when she said I needed it… that there is no other way. Fuck me, I didn't even notice that she alienated me from my family and made sure I never made any friends… hell I even let her pick my subs for me… she was in total control of my life until you came along." He says with smile.
"Me?" I ask surprised.
"Yes, when you fell into my office I knew I had to have you. I couldn't stay away and for the first time I didn't care what Elena thought about it. All I wanted was you and she knew… she knew that she had lost me, she knew that you were changing me, that you made me see what I was missing out on, that I didn't want you to stay in your role all the time. She knew that it was only a matter of time for me to figure it out and once I did she wouldn't have any hold on me any longer." He says and I frown.
"What did she know?"
"That I'm hopelessly in love with you, Ana." He says and my mouth drops open. Did he just say that he is in love with me?
"I should have figured it out earlier, but I didn't want to see it or maybe I just didn't know how to handle those feelings or how it would change things between us, but then I nearly lost you and it became so clear to me. I thought about how we met, what we did together, how you came into my life like a ray of sunlight on a cloudy day… and it weren't the moments where you've been my sub that I remembered, I remembered all the other moments, going to Bainbridge Island with Kate and Elliot, us talking and laughing together or all the times you said or did little things that normally would have pissed me off, yet with you it made me smile and all I could think of was that I wanted more of these moments… more of us just being Ana and Christian. I want you to be relaxed and happy around me, because it makes me happy to see you like this."
I stare at him completely speechless, if that wasn't a declaration of love, I don't know what is and of course it makes me cry again.
"Ok I'm not good at this help me out, are you upset or is that this pregnancy hormone thing I've read about?" He asks and it makes me laugh.
"I'm not upset, and yes since I'm pregnant I cry a lot, but I'm also happy to know that you feel the same way about me as I feel about you."
"So… where does that leave us?"
"I don't know, why don't we just keep spending time with each other and see where it leads us?"
"Sounds like a good plan." He says with a smile which I answer with a smile of my own. We might not run off into the sunset anytime soon… but I feel like today has been good start to build a healthy foundation to whatever relationship we are going to have in our future…