Alec's note: The second tape then. Caught your attention? Glad I finally could

The light shining in through my window from the setting sun glinted off the plastic on the tape. Do I want to? No. Do I have too? I think so. Yes. I take a shaky breath before putting the tape back in so the second side would play.

'Clary.' Didn't see that coming. 'My first friend when I moved here. You were pretty new too. You're mom made you move here a few months before I did for her new job. You had aready made a friend, but he was only here on the weekends at the time. A nerdy boy in a band who owned too many Hottopic shirts, and had an intense love for video games and anime. But he's got his own story.' I frown, are you talking about Simon Lewis? How could he possibly play into this?

'For now, I'm gonna tell the story of our friendship Clary. It is still, technically, intact.' Really, cause I never saw you two together. 'Or at least it was before I died.' Thank you Alec for stating the obvious and just making this worse. 'You still say hi to me to me if we happen to walk close enough together to make eye contact in the hall.' Wow, what a close friend ship. Though, I guess that is the point. I feel slight anger building inside me as the tapes play, unlocking secrets that otherwise would be gone forever. Putting people in a new light and showing their true colors. Why did people have to be so cruel? I remember I'm on the tapes though and kill that train of thought. Apparently, I have no room to judge.

'Or if you come to see Jace. Once upon a time, you and me were almost inseperable. We saw each other every day. If there was a group project, we looked at each other before the teacher even finished their sentence like in movies.' Aww, now that I think about it, they did work together a lot last year. At least at the beginning of the year.

'Every day after school, we met at a restaurant called Takis. You probably know of it and where it is. If not, follow your map to E5.'

I just stare at the map for a moment, contemplating. Alexander was the one who shoved it in my locker a week ago. The bell had rung and I stuffed it in my bag for later further examination.

By the time I got home, I had piled the days papers and my notebook on top of it and forgotten. This went on for a week until a few minutes ago. I dug it out. Now, in all it's glory, it lay before me crumpled and ripped in a few places. Just like most of the homework I bothered to turn in. It never failed to piss his teachers off and get him five points taken off.

Red stars and paths littered the map. The places specified were in line with Alec's tapes I presume. E5 he had said. I can't believe he actually had taken the time to draw out cordinates, as if traveling by sea and not suburban street. Maybe he had beem stalling, trying to find it in himself not to do it. Maybe that's what this entire process was. Stalling.

Thinking of it like that made me want to throw out both the tapes and the maps. But of course I don't.

I get up, carrying the shoebox with me and putting the map in my pocket. "I'm going out," I scream to my mom. She appears in the door way however before I can escape, eyebrows furrowed. "Where are you going?"

"Raphael's." I wasn't lying. That is my first stop. I know for a fact he has a portable tape player, I have seen it in his room before, and I want to listen to the rest of the tapes away from here. Takis maybe. Just anywhere but here.

I hold up the shoebox. "We have a project we're working on. I might end up spending the night so don't wait up." She nods, not looking completely convinced. "Okay," She says anyways. "Just call me so I know you got there safe." I nod. "K. Love you." The door slams shut behind me.

I avoid puddles, not wanting to get my beautiful sandalls ruined, shivering as the cold night air hits my bare arms. I should have grabbed a jacket, but it's too late now.

I know the way to Raphael's pretty well, despite not being there in a while. At least a month or two. I'm surprised to find him outside, perching gingerly on his motorcycle and just looking up at the stars. When he sees me, he smiles.

"Bane. Where have you been?" I shrug, not really having an answer. I've just been around. Raphael's eyes scope my body and if I didn't know any better, I'd say he was checking me out. But he was just a observant person, he was weighing the situation. "Anything I can help you with?"

I lean against the basketball goal not to far from him. "Yeah actually." I see no reason he can't know I'm listening to tapes in general.. If he happens to be on the tapes.. well he already knows anyway. He just hopefully wouldn't try to have a heart to heart with me. I don't know if I will ever be ready to discuss the tapes outloud. "I was wondering if you a had a portable tape player. Something like a walkman. You seem like the kind of person who may still have one." I know he does of course.

Raphael raises his eyebrows. "Strange request. But it just so happens I do." He opens a small leather pouch that was attached to the side of his motorcycle, digging around in it for a moment. He pulls out the device holding it out to me. "Thanks," I place it in my pocket after wrapping the plastic yellow headphones around it. He nods. "Yeah. No problem. May I ask what you're listening to? Anything I would know."

I shift posistions, rubbing my arm. "No, I don't think so. Just some old random songs my mom put on them. I haven't even listened to them myself." Raphael nods, still scanning me. "Interesting." I stand up straight, just wanting to get out of here now. "See you tomorrow at school?" He nods. "Yeah. See ya."

I wave before turning and heading towards Takis. My relief to be rid of Raphael's piercing gaze didn't last long once the cafe was within my sight. I can imagine Alexander and Clary laughing and walking through those doors, school bags slung over there shoulders.

I have to force myself to walk through those same doors. A smiling girl who looks around my age greets me, name tag saying Kailee. Once I order a water, I unwind the headphones and place the tape inside my newly borrowed item. I press play.

'When you walk in the door, someone greets you from a pedistal type thing to the right. Then booths line the walls on either side all the way back till the kitchen. A few tables are scattered in the middle, but no one sits there.' It is true. The tables in the center of the room are completely deserted. I sit in a booth on the right, closest to the kitchen.

'You, I and later Jordan, sat in a booth directly in the middle of the left row. You ordered fries everyday without fail. I either ordered a sweet tea or a vanilla milkshake. Jordan usually had a hamburger.

We met there and laughed and talked for an hour or two then went home only to repeat the next was my crutch in a school of strangers and gave me a break from my sucky home life.

You knew my parents fought a lot. When it got too bad, you let me sneak through your window and stay with you for the night. Your mom would have killed you if she had ever found out. But you still let me. And my life got much better for those months.

Then I invited you over to my house to work on the group project for Mrs. Jones. You, Jordan and I usually went to your house, but your mom had a headache. Jordan's parents didn't like me fore reasons I know yet.
When Jace saw you, I didn't know it was the beginning of the end. I did know he thought you were hot. And I knew you were attracted to him. But who wasn't?' I mentally raise my hand as my water arrives.

'Let me make this clear. I had no problem with this. I want nothing more then for both of you to be happy. Jace is my brother,no matter what he's said and done to me. You are my friend. Even if you completely abandoned me.

Jordan and I ended up doing most of that project by ourselves that night.

The next day when we all went to Takis, you told me about how much you liked Jace. I smiled and nodded, telling you funny stories about him. Listened to gushy, joking confessions of love. And all the while,I had no idea I was losing one of my best friends.

The next day only Jordan and I showed up to Takis. I asked Jordan if he knew where you went. I knew you had been at school that day. He said you had a date. I had been excited for you, not sure why you didn't text me too, but excited.

You didn't show the next day either. Jordan again said you had a date. When I got home, I found from Jace the date had been with him.

The next day, I wasn't to surprised to find you wern't there. Jordan said you had a date. When I got home, you sat on my couch. You smiled and hugged me, but you and Jace didn't pay any attention to me all night.

When I got home the next day, you hugged me and I went to my room. The next, you waved. The next, you glanced. The next, you didn't even spare me that.

I went to Takis exactly a week after you stepped coming to find Jordan not there. Ate as usual I thought. But twenty minutes later, I got a text saying he had a date.

This went on for three days before I stopped checking my phone when it buzzed. I knew what it said. Five days, the buzzing stopped. Seven, I went straight home.

On this day I kinda hoped you'd asked me why I was here. I hadn't come straight home since the first day of school, even since -you- started coming straight to my home. But you didn't. It had been six months and I lost both my best friends in two weeks.'