Everyone was packed and ready to leave within the hour. Luke lead the group with a steady stride and Clementine hovered between him and myself while walking. She seemed to trust these people, maybe I should too. Making that effort was hard, especially in times like these. I could maybe give into trusting them, but I knew I couldn't get close. Getting close would drive me off the edge.
"Scarlett?" A voice I had come to dislike asked. I turned my head to see Rebecca looking at me with trying eyes.
"Whats up?" I asked adjusting the rifle strap on my shoulder.
"Can I talk to you for a second?" With a mental sigh, I slowed my pace so I was in time with Rebecca. She smiled at me while cradling her stomach with both hands, she looked exhausted.
"I'm sorry for dragging you and Clem into this mess with us." I shook my head.
"Nah, I was deep in this shit long before I ran into you guys. I was just hoping I'd never have to face it again."
"You and me both. It's scary, to think about what might have happened had we all been there when he showed up. It's a good thing you and Clem joined us, I know I was harsh toward you both but, I am glad you're here." I looked at her straight on and of the first time, I saw a decent woman in Rebecca. She was a good person but she was scared and looking out for her own. She was acting rationally toward two strangers showing up at her door.
"Thanks, I appreciate it." She smile, it made her face look so much younger and kinder. She looked down at her stomach and had a mixed set of emotions play out across her face.
"What a time to be pregnant." She sighed rubbing her swollen stomach.
"You gotta live in the moment, right? No regrets."
"Oh I've got plenty of those but," She looked to her husband who walked along behind us.
"This baby isn't one of them." She looked at him with such love and admiration it was hard to believe people still had that. She looked at him the way my parents looked at each other, and painful memories came flooding back. A silence grew between us and Rebecca took it upon herself to break it.
"I remember Bill talking about you, back at the camp." She looked down at her feet lowering her voice. "If you ever need someone to talk about it, I'm here." She said but I didn't meet her eyes, I hardly acknowledged what she was saying.
"Thanks but you should talk to Clem, I'm sure she'd like that," I said my voice brittle as I fought away horrible memories. As I suggested Rebecca walked forward in time with Clem. The two bounced around with conversation, I looked over my shoulder to Nick who walked behind Carlo and Sarah. He looked around his surrounds nervously, he must have been desperate to find his uncle. An understandable desire that I myself shared. I watched Clem trail off and felt my heart stop as we neared the fallen bodies of walkers surrounding an old truck.
"There. That's where we were." Clementine said point to the truck we all stood around. Nick slowly crept closer until he was beside Clementine, he took off in a sprint and threw the truck doors open.
"He's not in here!" He exclaimed panicked.
"This was the last place I saw him," Clementine reported her own worry bubbling up in her voice.
"Maybe he's around here somewhere," Carlos said keeping a firm grip on the rifle he held. Nick went one way and Luke another and eventually the whole group began branching off in search of Pete. I walked around keeping a tight grip on the rifle in my hands so it didn't become slick with the sweat forming on my palms. This is what happened when you care about someone, the fear swallows you up and become overwhelming. It becomes the only thing you can think about. This is why I needed to leave, these were good people; if I got attached this same fear would swallow me again and again with each passing disaster that would come.
"Oh my God." Nick cracked as everyone began to gather around near Clementine. I followed the group my breath hitched in my chest, my whole body felt stiff. When I saw what we gathered around everything feel away. There in a mangled pile of blood and flesh were Petes remains. His stomach ripped open and his limbs sprawled in all directions. I couldn't breathe. The only thing I heard or felt was the message playing in my mind over and over. We need to leave before this happens again. I looked at Clementine who's face was struck with horror, I couldn't let this happen to her. After a moment Luke managed to pull Nick away from the mangled site and get the group on course again. I found myself walking behind everyone keeping watch for whoever shot Pete, but I could barely get past the dark and sad thoughts that clouded my head. I found myself joined by Nick who didn't look any better. I watched Clem as she spoke to Luke, she looked over her shoulder at me and I tried to give her a weak smile. It came off as nothing more than a sharp breath.
"I was a jerk," Nick said getting my attention. "We were fighting, I don't even remember the last thing I said to him. Some shit Nephew I was."
"He loved you, and he knew you loved him. That's all that matters."
"Still," He sighed dragging his feet in the dirt.