CHAPTER 4 IS HERE!

EVERYBODY RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!

It was very late at night. Raphael was fast asleep under his silk sheets in his bed with a smirk on his lips, having "pleasant" dreams of someone special. Was it Ivy, or Seigfried, or Cassandra? Nobody knew, but he dreamt on anyway, until he was woken up by distant chattering. It sounded like an emotional girl talking on a cell phone. He groaned as he rolled out of bet and put on his Barney slippers to walk into the other room. He walked up to the door in Amy's room and could here her complaining loudly to one of her good friends.

"It's so not fair! I just got off of punishment the other day for stabbing that whore Ivy! Now he wants to punish me again for praying!" he heard her squealing. The person on the receiver was just as loud.

"Tell me about it! My parents are about to send me off to the asylum just because I communicate with the wind!" the person responded.

"It's so not fair!" Amy whined. Raphael finally chose that moment to interrupt their complaining.

"Amy, what did I tell you?" he asked like the parent he was. Amy turned around, quickly glancing at Raphael, then sighing irritably.

"I have to go. Bye, Talim," she said, finally hanging up. Raphael walked up to Amy, reaching out his hand and signaling her to give him the cell phone. She glared and dropped it in his hand.

" 'No phone' means NO PHONE!" He said as he gripped his fingers around the phone (Why the hell does she even have one? We may never know…)

"You suck!" Amy yelled angrily. Suddenly Raphael's eyes shot wide.

"…Who told you I suck? Did Santa tell you?" he asked frantically. Amy sat still and stared back at her father. She didn't mean it literally, so why is he frantic if someone knows he sucks? Better yet…WHAT IS HE SUCKING! Amy began to worry about her father, when suddenly there was a loud crash heard. Both of them pause, looking around the room for the sound.

"What was that!" Raphael asked.

"I dunno…" Amy answered. Raphael turned to walk out of the room.

"I'll go check it out. You stay in here and STAY OFF THE PHONE," he said, giving emphasis on the last part of the sentence, as if putting it in caps didn't help you already establish that.

The crash of coarse was done by non other than Tira who had made her entrance through the window. She had been out all night, searching relentlessly for the newest host for Soul Edge. She had her ring blade in her hand, smiling as she looked at the posh settings of the castle around her. She found her latest target, a man with a small amount of evil energy surrounding him. His blood was already tainted, so that would make a perfect start for her.

Speak of the devil, Raphael was walking tiredly down the hall in his PJ's, sword in hand, wondering what all the noise was about. He was pretty sure it was Siegfried wanting to "taste his Baggett" again, but he brought Flambert anyway just in case. He quickly popped up and got into his well-known stance when he saw the girl.

"What do you want?" he asked in a rough, threatening tone. The plant-like girl smiled crazily, lifting up her ring blade.

"I want your body…" she said, sounding just as insane as she looked. Raphael pointed his sword out at her when he spoke.

"Well, get in line! Lot's of women want it!" he answered, smirking on the last part of his sentence.

"They do?" Tira asked, dropping the smile and tilting her head in confusion.

"Yeah, loads of them come over every night just like you," he continued.

'Well, master must have other servants searching for hosts other than me,' she thought.

"That is, unless you're really eager to have it, then I can arrange something," Raphael continued. Tira smiled wildly once again, raising up her weapon and getting into her stance.

"Oh, yes! So willing! I like that!" she said gleefully. With that, Raphael began to slowly take off his shirt and pants in a seductive matter. Tira's eyes shot wide at the sight of such an event. The next thing she knew, he was standing in the middle of the room in briefs with his pants down to his ankles.

"What the hell are you doing?" she asked confusedly.

"You said you wanted my body! Are you changing your mind!"

Tira finally understood what he meant. She began to shake her head frantically. "Nooooo! I don't mean that!" she yelled.

"THEN WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT! WHY MUST YOU WOMEN BE SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND!"

At that very moment, Amy decided to come downstairs for a glass of water. She could here some commotion in the other room. Her curiosity overruling her thirst, she walked into the other room to see the frightening scene of her father stripped down to his underwear. She jumped back and screamed.

"OH MY GOD! DADDY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!" she shrieked. Raphael quickly turned his head to see Amy and covered himself with his hands.

"I TOLD YOU TO STAY UPSTAIRS! WE ARE HAVING AN ADULT CONVERSATION!" he yelled back.

"WHAT THE HELL KIND OF CONVERSATION ARE YOU HAVING WITH YOUR PANTS OFF!"

"What did I tell you about cursing! Go upstairs!" he commanded, snapping his fingers. She finally turned and walked off, hoping to God this was just part of a very bad dream.

Raphael finally turned his attention back to Tira, who was actually beginning to blush at this point as she was staring at his body.

"…You're offering to anyone?" she asked sheepishly. He gave her one of his debonair smirks. Sometimes, he was such a manwhore.

"Yeah, only if you want it," he answered back in a smooth, seductive voice.

"Okay," she answered quickly, dropping her weapon and walking up to him. They proceeded to walk upstairs for the night.

(NOTE: "Baggett" is that long French bread, just to let you know)