Chpt. 3
"So, what are your guy's names?" It had been a while since Terezi and Karkat had arrived, and Harry had wasted no time introducing Terezi to his friends.
"Well, you already know Harry," Hermione began, "I'm Hermione, that's Ron," Terezi smiled as she looked at Ron, and took a deep sniff through her nose. Ron edged away from Terezi, and Hermione looked at him, amused. Harry couldn't help but laugh quietly.
"That's Ginny," Ginny waved, "And Fred and George are upstairs."
"Are you related?" Ron nodded.
"Was that your lusus in the other room?"
"What's a lusus?" Hermione asked, intrigued by the unfamiliar word.
"Oh right, I forgot you guys don't have lusus. What do you call them? I think Dave said something about a Bro?" She shrugged, "Eh, whatever. A lusus is a guardian or caretaker."
"Where do you come from?"
"Alternia."
"I've never heard of a place called Alternia." Terezi shrugged, and began to twirl her cane, when it disappeared.
"Where did it go!?" Hermione asked, her eyes wide.
"I captalogued it. I don't really need it."
"Captalogue?" Ron asked, forgetting her earlier space invasions.
"You know, in my Sylladex. Everyone I know had one."
"I've never seen one before," Hermione said, "Can you explain?"
"Hmm, well it turns items into cards, where you can retrieve and store items at will. I use a Scratch and Sniff Modus to retrieve items."
"Can I see one?"
"Sure." Terezi looked up at the ceiling for a moment and a blue and purple card appeared in her hand, and she passed it to Hermione, who looked it over.
"How do you get the item out?"
"Scratch it." Hermione began to scratch the card with her nail, and a yellow dragon stuffed animal with a noose around its neck materialized. Hermione looked at it and picked it up curiously.
"What-?"
"That is Senator Lemonsnout. The smell of lies and deceit still linger."
"What?" This time it was Ron who asked the question.
"Nah, just messing with you. Sometimes I hold court and pretend they're alive just to annoy people. People being Karkat."
"You really like to annoy him, don't you?" Ron said.
She smiled at him, "Yes I do, Mr. Pumpkin."
"Why do you keep calling me that!?"
She smiled at him, "Because your hair smells like pumpkin."
Ron stared at her, a little weirded out, "What my hair smells like?"
She looked at Ron from behind her reflective glasses, "Yeah, every color has a flavor. Brown smells like chocolate, blue is obviously blue berries, bright orange is pumpkin, and orange is orange creamsicle. Black is licorice, and my very favorite is bright cherry red." She finished and grinned contentedly, "Like Karkat."
"How can you smell colors?" Hermione asked, thinking it was a prank.
"My lusus taught me how to."
"Why?" Harry asked.
"Oh, well I'm blind, Mr. Licorice."
"What!? But I haven't seen you trip over anything!"
"Of course not. I can see, smell and taste colors with my nose and mouth."
"Really," Hermione said dryly, "You're blind? Terezi smiled her shark grin, and took her glasses off. She opened her eyes, revealing her scorched corneas. Hermione unsuccessfully stifled a gasp, but Terezi continued to grin as she replaced her glasses.
"Still don't believe me?" Hermione shook her head slowly.
"H-how did-? Hermione asked but was interrupted by Terezi.
"How did it happen? I looked into the sun." Hermione nodded and slumped back in the armchair. Terezi grabbed Senator Lemonsnout and captalogued him before sitting down once again.
"Ah. This is the comfiest-," she paused, as though searching for the right word, "chair I've sat on in a long time."
Hermione frowned, having noticed the pause as well, but her thoughts were interrupted by a loud banging sound. Harry turned to look at the cause of the noise, and saw Karkat standing in the middle of the door.
"Really," he said his voice a near shout, "You leave me to sleep in some sort of f***ed up recuperacoon while you just chat up the humans?"
"Well," Terezi said, smiling, "I did give you a good nub thrashing. So it's not my fault you decided to take a nap and not wake up."
He looked at her, the bags under his eyes even darker than before he passed out, "My head hurts." He had stopped shouting.
"Probably due to the aforementioned cane thrashings. Out like a wiggler."
Karkat rolled his eyes, "Is this going to become a regular thing? Whenever I pass out you start hitting me?"
"You're the one who asked me to wake you up with any means necessary."
"F*** past me!" he shouted. Hermione raised her eyebrows, "But that order still stands."
"Do you want to start a memo on Fruity Rumpus Asshole Factory? You can argue with yourself for a bit. Then you can go on a rant about how the only person worse than future you is past you."
Karkat scowled, if possible, even deeper, "F*** them both." Terezi laughed and Karkat said, still scowling, "I'm going to go see if any other assholes are online."
"Have fun with that!" Terezi called out after him, and rolled her eyes, "He can be such a wiggler sometimes."
Ignoring the foreign term, Hermione asked, "So what did he mean 'future me' and 'past me'?"
Terezi cackled, "Oh gog, it's hilarious! All those memos are filled up with gray blocks of angry text!"
Hermione was going to ask more but was interrupted by an angry shout from upstairs, and loud thumps signaling someone running downstairs.
Karkat entered the room once again, his eyes wide, and his breathing panicked.
"Terezi? You're going to want to see this." Ron was about to say something about how she was blind and couldn't technically see it, but Terezi beat him to it.
"You mean smell it?"
"Yeah, whatever, I don't give a shit, just come check this out." He brought a huge computer with a six legs out.
"What's the husktop for?"
"Just look at this."
Terezi, and the other people in the room moved over to get a better look at the screen. From what they could see it was the beginning of a conversation.
carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling twinArmageddons at 18:26
CG: SOLLUX.
CG: SOLLUX.
CG: GET ON YOUR F***ING PROFILE ASSWIPE.
TA: 2orry kk
TA: two bu2y dealiing wiith iimportant 2hit
CG: WELL, WHATEVER.
CG: THIS SHIT IS WAY MORE IMPORTANT.
TA: that could be argued
CG: ARE YOU NOT PRANCING THROUGHOUT THE AFTERLIFE ANYMORE AND LOOK LIKE A F***ING HUMAN? (Karkat had turned away from the other people except Terezi at this point.)
TA: a2 a matter of fact ii do
TA: ii 2uppo2e you reacted badly
CG: NO
CG: I GOT KIDNAPPED BY SOME F***ING HUMANS WITH ROTTED THINKPANS FIRST
CG: AND I *ALSO* GOT INTERROGATED
TA: no human2 have found u2 yet
CG: WHO'S US?
arachnidsGrip [AG] began trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG] at 18:24
AG: Karkat!
AG: Karkaaaaaaaat!
CG: NOT NOW VRISKA
CG: I'M TALKING TO SOLLUX
AG: Fiiiiiiiine!
AG: :::;)
arachnidsGrip [AG] quit trolling carcinoGeneticist at 18:25
CG: WAIT
CG: WAS THAT
CG: VRISKA?
CG: O:B
TA: ye2
CG: WHO'S WITH YOU
TA: cc, ca, and aa
CG: HOW?
TA: ii dont know
CG: KEEP YOUR IDENTITY A SECRET
CG: I'M GOING TO GO TALK TO SPIDERBITCH.
carcinoGeneticist [CG] quit trolling twinArmageddons [TA] at 18:28
carcinoGenticist [CG] began trolling arachnidsGrip 18:29
CG: VRISKA
AG: Yes, Karkat?
CG: YOU HAVE YOUR EYEPATCH RIGHT?
AG: Yes, why?
CG: PUT IT ON
AG: Okay.
CG: I'M NOT GOING TO ASK HOW YOU'RE F***ING ALIVE, JUST WHO'S WITH YOU.
AG: You're no fun!
AG: 8ut Toreasnore, TC, AC, CT, and Ms. Fussyfangs are here.
AG: Why?
CG: DON'T REVEAL THAT YOUR TROLLS
CG: WE'LL MEET UP LATER.
AG: Alright.
AG: 8ut
AG: Only 8ecause you asked soooooooo politely.
CG: F*** YOU
carcinoGeneticist [CG] quit trolling arachnidsGrip [AG] at 18:31
The humans in the room were confused by the look of rage and confusion that had appeared on Terezi's face.
"Spiderbitch."
Here's chapter 3. I don't know what to say right now, except thanks for the favs and follows
Homestuck © Hussie
Harry Potter © J.K. Rowling