By the time the three teens had emerged from the room it was well past 9:30. Before he had the chance to even talk to Shawn, Cory and Topanga had all but dragged Alan out the door, saying they were all going to get ready for a late breakfast outing once those at the Turner residence were dressed and ready to go.
Hearing the door slam, Jon emerged from his small study space to see his apartment empty except for the lone, hunched figure sitting on his couch. The figure turned halfway to meet his gaze.
"Hi." Shawn greeted.
"Hi…" Jon greeted back, more than a little confused at first, unsure as to where his guests had gone. Maybe they wanted to give them some privacy? Just then, Jonathan's theory was confirmed when Shawn spoke up once more, louder than before.
"Can we talk? I kinda have some stuff I wanna say." he requested vaguely, a strained look upon his face, as if saying the words left a sour taste in his mouth.
Temporarily, Jon was caught off guard, because Shawn had never before made such a request. Whenever he wanted to talk it was about trying to haggle for a late note or staying out late on a school night or extended time for classwork, and on the very rare occasion, help with homework. Never had Shawn ever said those words without an overzealous or sheepish grin on his face.
Realizing he's taken too much time already and not wanting Shawn to take his words back, "Yeah. Yeah, sure." Jon readily agreed as he hastily made his way to the couch and took a seat next to the teenager. "What's up?" he asked, turning so that he and Shawn were face to face, nonverbally communicating that he was completely open to this new development in their somewhat strained relationship.
After giving Jon a strange look at his behavior, Shawn said "I'm just gonna guess that you know what happened." sounding faintly aloof.
Jon treaded with extreme caution, afraid to say the wrong thing or scare Shawn off. "What Matthews and Lawrence were talking to you about?"
Shawn nodded, but at Jon's look he spoke aloud. "Yeah. About my dad."
Still afraid of revealing any information that Shawn didn't know, Jon asked for Shawn to elaborate further. "What about him? So I know we're on the same page."
Shawn seemed as if he were trying not to roll his eyes, or as if he wanted to but simply couldn't find the will to make his organs do such a thing at the moment. "That he abandoned me to run around with some lady that may or may not be my mom?" he deadpanned.
After a slight pause, Jon nodded. At first a little taken aback by hearing the words said so bluntly. "Shawn–" he started.
"No." the teen interrupted. At Jon's mildly surprised expression, Shawn apologized halfheartedly. "I'm sorry, but I gotta say what I gotta say. When I'm done you can say whatever you need to. You can yell, scream, I don't care. Just let me say what I have to say." Shawn finished with a steely gaze to the man.
Jon nodded once again. "Okay." he voiced. He swept his hands out in a welcoming gesture and spoke "You have the floor."
Shawn gave him an appreciative and somewhat judgy look before taking a few moments to work over what he wanted to say. Finally, he gave a deep breath and then begun. "I...always sorta knew that my folks were never the best. We'd move around a lot cause my dad had trouble keeping a job. My mom never liked living in the trailer park so once my dad got a stable job in Philly, she was really happy because we were able to buy our first real house. For a while, things were good. I mean, they'd still argue a lot but at the end of the day we had food on the table and a nice house to sleep in. Then my dad started...getting sloppy. And that's when the fights started getting bad. They'd always run off for a couple of hours to cool off on their own afterwards."
"They left you alone?" Jonathan asked cautiously, unsure if he was allowed to interrupt but also not able to stop himself from voicing his concern.
"Well, yeah. But it was okay. I'd just go to Cory's or something." the teen admitted in such a matter-of-fact way that it actually alarmed Jonathan. His parents would leave him alone for hours? They'd move from town to town? Jon should probably ask George to see Shawn's transcript... He was an idiot for not trying to look at it already.
"In sixth grade, my dad finally lost his first stable job. My parents were planning on leaving town again and trying to start over somewhere new but...I wanted to stay. I made friends here and I didn't care where we were living. I just wanted to stay somewhere for once. I don't really know why, but they agreed to stay but my dad couldn't find a job and the fights got worse and worse and then before I knew it, mom wasn't coming home anymore for days or weeks at a time and then dad would get angrier and…"
Shawn took a shaky breath, calming himself down and seemingly changing his train of thought. "They were never great parents. They could never stick around. Not at their jobs, not in town, and not with their family. I've been moving around all my life, Jon. That's why I want the next move I make to be more permanent. I want to be in a place where people stay." he confessed, finally referring to Jon in his long spiel. "I realize that the next move probably won't be with my parents, but I don't want that. I can't want that anymore.
"I know you haven't finished the adoption papers. Man, I should've knew the second he gave you the papers that he wasn't…" he stopped the new thought almost as soon as it started, then breathed out heavily through his nose. "If you don't want to adopt me, then fine. I'll get out of your hair. But I–"
"Alright, Hunter." Jon finally interrupted. "Why don't you read this while you come up for air?" he suggested, handing Shawn the stack of papers he walked into the room with.
Shawn gave Jon a curious look as he took the stack and inspected it. He read the first few lines, as the document was a little too text-heavy for him, and raised an eyebrow after realizing what they meant. "The adoption papers?" he questioned.
"Yep. And just this once, I'm gonna give you permission to skip ahead in the reading." he joked lightly with a nod to the papers, giving Shawn permission to flip through.
As he perused the documents, he noticed something very similar and familiar found throughout the document. "You...you signed them?" Shawn stated, but his soft, unsure tone made it sound more like a question.
"Uh-huh. Everything that needed a signature from me now has one." Jon confirmed. "I just need to get them approved by a few people before anything's official.
"Who needs to approve it?" Shawn asked, trying to sound less hopeful than he really felt. Hope was for suckers, after all.
"Well for starters, you." At Shawn's confused gaze, Jon continued. "I'll be your guardian, Shawn. This doesn't have to just be a place for you to crash at night. This can be your home. Wherever we go, it'll be your home. You'll be, officially, my responsibility. And I try my hardest to follow through with everything I do."
Shawn was silent for a few moments to process everything that Jon said and running over the words a few times in his head, just to make sure he wasn't making a mistake. That this was really happening. Finally, after giving a shaky breath, Shawn started nodding his head up and down hastily.
"Is that a yes?" Jon asked.
"Yeah. Yeah it's a yes." Shawn confirmed verbally, lifting his head to be eye level with Jon once again. The teen was a little embarrassed to realize that his eyes were getting very damp, very fast, but for once he didn't really care all that much.
Jon was more than happy to hear the acceptance but could help but notice the anxious way that Shawn was currently fidgeting. It wasn't necessarily a bad anxious but it was enough for Jon to voice his concerns. "You okay?"
"Yeah, yeah. I'm fine." Shawn assured, voice trembling slightly with emotion. Though which emotion, Jon wasn't sure. "I guess I'm just a little...relieved."
"Relieved?" he parroted.
When Shawn replied, his tone suggested humor but his body language and words expressed something else entirely as he admitted "Well, I didn't really have a plan if you said… Well, if you said no."
"What, you think I was gonna dump you on the street?" he joked with a smile. He expected a response, but instead received none. Jon looked to the boy only to feel the overwhelming desire to kick himself in the pants. Shawn's gaze was focused on his lap and he was pulling at his shirt sleeve in a clearly troubled manner. "Hey, hey listen." Jon commanded, gently grabbing Shawn by the shoulders and forcing the teen's gaze to meet his own. "You're not gonna get left on the street. Ever. I promise that no matter how often we get at each other's throats, how often we annoy one another, how difficult things might get, I will never, never leave you on your own. I signed these papers because I'm taking responsibility of you. Not as charity or because I have to, but because I want to. And not just for a little while until I get sick of you." he finished.
"Then for how long?" Shawn asked quietly.
"For as long as you need me." Jon replied. "And probably even after that for my own selfish purposes because believe it or not, kid, I actually like having you around." he finished lightheartedly. However, his happy tone seemed to work against him because something shocking and unfamiliar to Jon happened once again; Shawn moved forward in a rush and hugged him.
Jon was frozen for a few moments, at first unsure what to do, but when Shawn didn't immediately pull away in embarrassment, Jon gave himself permission to wrap his arms around the teen's smaller, shaky frame. Jon was also surprised to recognize that Shawn's slight tremors were actually muffled sobs and that there was currently a wet patch forming on his shirt.
"Hey," he quickly spoke, sounding a bit awkward. He was a little out of his depth here. "it's okay. Don't be sad." he soothed as he unconsciously tightened their embrace.
"I-I...I'm not sad." came Shawn's muffled voice. He pulled his flushed face away from Jon's chest for better ability to speak. "I mean, I'm still upset about the stuff from before but...I'm happy." he finished, pulling away from Jon and rubbing at his face, trying to rid himself of the evidence of his moment of weakness. "Sorry." he apologized in a breathy laugh that sounded hollow.
"Nothing to be sorry about." Jon assured without a moment of hesitation. "Well, I am a little sorry that I didn't think to eat last night because I'm starving now. What do you say we go grab a bite to eat?" he suggested, standing up from his seat.
Shawn followed, calming down for the first time, his face relaxing. "Actually, Cory said something about getting some breakfast with his dad, Topanga, and you. If you want to we can call them?" he requested. The teen then started to wipe his face more with his shirt sleeves, attempting to be nonchalant.
"Sounds good." Jon agreed, pretending to have not seen the action. "On our way to the Matthews we can drop off the papers and start getting things sorted out.."
Shawn's movements ceased. He looked up to Jon with wide eyes and a hopeful look, as if he were still surprised by Jon's decision to actually adopt him. "Really?" the boy questioned.
"Really." Jon repeated confidently. "It'll take a few days, but sooner or later, everything will be official. Go get yourself ready while I get everything we'll need together."
"Okay." Shawn agreed in a strange tone. The teen was currently not meeting Jon's gaze once again and was sucking on his bottom lip, in an attempt to hide the grin that was quickly forming on his face. And slowly, Jon could see the exuberant, fun-loving fifteen year old he knew and loved returning. Jon knew that he still had a long way to go before any real healing and trust could again be established, but it was a start. And a damned good one if you asked Jon.
"I'll be right back!" the teen announced as he hurriedly ran from the room after grabbing the wireless phone.
As the teen ran off, Jon couldn't help but mimic the happy look as well, looking forward to this morning's long-awaited breakfast and the many more that would now be shared with someone he cared greatly for. Someone who was now family.