Arc 2: The Devil's Playhouse
Sequence 1: Water through fingers.

i sit on the couch with a book in my hand.
so, another new universe.
i wonder if this is an alice or a basic universe?
since we first arrived in the alice cluster we randomly switched between them.
that was more than five hundred jumps ago.
differentiating between them is quite easy.
but i had learned to be vigilant.
so, time to go to the lab.
i look for the bookmark.
it had been some time since the last time when i was awake at the reset start.
i think it only happened once or twice since asriel has been with me.
where is the bookmark?
the book is about halfway through.
huh, i wonder what exactly he was reading...
ender's game?
i read that ages ago.
inspired a few of my other favourite stories.
was a good read.
huh... i wonder at which part he is.
wait...
mobile phone!
i quickly grab papyrus' phone.
* bahp-deep-click
that was close.
* heya.
* Howdy, they got hit, and listened intently.
* nice.
* So, which universe is it?
oh damn, i should've already checked by now.
* let me look.
* Okay, so search in the drawers, call me back, it's showtime.
i shortcut to the lab.
no ring on the table.
the book is still in my hand.
forgot to put it down.
i grab a something from the table and use it as a bookmark.
after a few minutes searching the drawers i come up empty handed.
i look for my spare hoodie but instead there is a coat lying on the chair.
i check its pockets for an id card.
nothing there aside from pastry wrappers.
so not likely alice.
but i'll know where we are for sure, when the human reaches hotland.
maybe i should check the scrapbook?
but that's not definite proof or even evidence.
i look around.
the mirror at the south wall greets me.
i hadn't really taken my appearance in, but i'm not wearing my usual t-shirt and shorts.
i'm only wearing snas brand underpants.
damn, this one is an even greater slob than usual...
i'd better get some clothes.
i shortcut to my room and open my closet.
buttoned shirts.
why are there so many buttoned shirt.
and no hoodie or parka.
only grey, black and blue buttoned shirts.
well, not only those.
there are still t-shirts.
i grab one and throw it on.
i also look for pants.
but no shorts there either.
just, regular pants.
with a sigh i put them on.
i won't go out in underpants.
the last time things went... silly.
i consider the buttoned shirts.
maybe he has a hoodie or parka around here somewhere?
i spend a lot of time searching.
the next time i look at a clock an hour has passed.
that is strange... it didn't feel that long.
but i've lost too much time by now.
i grab a shirt at random and put it on.
i start buttoning it up.
now off to look for some evidence about where we are.
running around without a hoodie might attract suspicion.
so i'll ask around snowdin when i'm done with alphys' lab.

i shortcut to alphys' true lab.
i stand in the hallway where the twenty second entry would be.
nothing in front of me.
so this should be basic.
at least probably.
i hear something.
i glance up and down the hall.
can't see anything.
lights are on of course, the power out occurs later.
just nothing of interest.
maybe my mind is playing a trick on me?
i sigh.
the air is heavy and musty.
a faint smell of the liquified bodies of the amalgamates still hangs here.
they are tough as nails and can pack quite a punch.
as far as i've seen the human can't even scratch them.
i wonder if i could do it?
they shouldn't be innocent so the karma might-
WHAT THE FUCK?
where did that thought come from?
i snap back to reality.
my feet carried me to the bed room.
i think the noises came from here.
but no one's here.
well, so much for that.
i shortcut back to this sans' lab.
now that i know my context i can look through the scrapbook.
in the drawer are multiple books.
that is a lot.
i start with the top most.
it isn't a scrapbook for memories.
it's a notebook for ideas.
in it are a lot of notes on theoretical magical tech.
hard light holograms, magic powered headphones, healing ointment...
i go through the others.
more notebooks.
about so many different subjects.
not one is even half full.
biology, philosophy, games and spells...
artificial monster flesh and souls...
ethics on monster experimentation, if humans can feel pain...
theoretical rules for time chess, game master notes...
soul data storage, high density pure magic projectiles...
mostly just theoretical, ludicrous ideas.
the amount of writing in them combined is close to the scrapbook.
they don't really help me.
why doesn't he keep a scrapbook?
this is strange.
i lean back, the coat sliding to the ground.
with a sigh i pick it up.
why would he keep his coat there?
and why does he even have one?
it's black with six big buttons.
i put it on and look through the pockets.
mostly crumpled up paper, wrappers for pastries and such.
i sit back down again.
okay, what the hell is going on here?
goddamn my head feels like it's filled with syrup.
whatever is with my head, it feels like i'm drunk or worse.
how to clear it?
on the desk are also a pair of headphones.
i remember something about them in one of the notebooks.
the topmost, if i remember right.
i reach for it and notice, i still have the coat on.
huh...
maybe this is what he wears instead of the hoodie?
it has a hood, so... yeah, could be.
i search for the entry about the headphones.
ah, here it is.
* regular headphones that have a built in computer to play music.
* connect to magic and it draws energy from it.
* much better than stupid headphones and stupid tapes.
* no cables!
hmmm...
yeah, i think some music could really help my head.
i put it on, connect it to my magic and press play.
it plays a nice tune, don't know the genre but it is pretty catchy.
i listen to it and relax a bit, waiting for my head to clear.
i can still use the time constructively.
most sans' don't leave scientific notes lying around, so this might be an opportunity.
the spell notebook in hand i take a closer look at the soul data storage spell.
it has been started and crossed out a few times.
but it doesn't look like the thing works.
the last few look promising with a bit of work.
i can't really use that since i don't have a soul of my own.
but i could try this out on asriel...
after the last one is a cryptic note.
* what if outside of everything?
huh.
i look at a few more pages.
enhanced movement with telekinesis.
already using that.
pausing the music, it's kinda distracting.
telepathy.
it's four whole pages of trials and failures.
on the fifth he starts talking about soulbonding as an approach.
well, looks like someone lost their innocence.
i don't think i ever did before the whole...
i put the notebook down.
maybe another one?
hm, something is...
oh, yeah, i stopped the music.
restarting it, it plays some kind of droning ambience.
like from a horror movie soundtrack.
not in the mood for that.
skipping it.
the next one starts slowly with brass.
i lean back and close my eyes.
it grows, gaining a tad grandness.
i stand up, feel like stretching my legs.
a trumpet solo sets in.
i start walking up and down my lab.
this is nice.
my imagination sets into overdrive.
i can imagine the scene in my head.
me standing in the corridor, the human coming up to me.
leaving the headphones on.
dodging my way through their attacks in the rhythm to the music,
a knife in my hand, slitting their throat.
clutching their throat the blood doesn't stop flowing.
and i stand over them, smiling.
and then the lyrics start...
"I get tired of the things that change, around me in this so called game. Please somebody make a change."
i snap back to reality.
HOLY FUCKING SHIT!
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME TODAY?
i stand still and stop the music.
* bahp-deep-bahp-click
* ... heya.
have i really just spent about an hour reading books and listening to music?
* Howdy, well, the human is a pacifist and just spared Mum.
* good, i'll get to my post.
* Good. And which universe is it?
* basic as far as i can tell.
* Okay, see ya at the end.
i end the call.
well, i guess it's time now.

i shortcut to the door.
snow is everywhere.
it's beautiful here.
a cold wind is whistling around my legs.
wait...
cold?
i feel the cold?
usually i just know whether it's cold or not.
but this...
i can feel the warmth in my bones exiting my body.
the sensation of cooling down...
a chill goes down my spine.
literally.
i feel the cold!
my grin gets broader.
this is new.
three new things.
the buttoned shirts, the multiple notebooks and the cold.
maybe this is another multiverse?
would explain why i didn't find a whoopee cushion.
and i noticed that pretty early, not three resets in.
i laugh and skip towards the human.
i open a shortcut around me.
it leads to a black stone in the depths of waterfall.
makes me look like a shadow.
before i notice i stand behind them.
but i don't have the cushion...
so i hesitate, what now?
they stand there, back to me, only in their striped shirt.
aren't they cold?
i should really get them somewhere warm.
* Hello little human, aren't you cold? I can bring you to my house, if you want to warm up.
the human turns around.
they have the same look as always.
how can i put it?
kind of like a dreamer.
like all this is natural.
and that i should get on with it.
i dispel the shortcut.
* since you must be freezing down to your bones.
* name's sans.
* sans the skeleton.
i hold my hand out and the human shakes it.
now i would usually go on about sentry duty and paps.
it'd be safe to say paps is a sentry.
but i thought the same about alphys and undyne getting it on.
well, this is only between me and the human anyway.
time to improvise.
i walk to where my sentry station usually stands.
the human follows me.
* you're lucky i found you on my stroll.
i can already see the lamp.
* someone else might try to do something to you.
* but, don't worry.
* i'll look after-
no sentry station.
universe number three.

* you.
okay, this is huge.
this is not just different ships.
i can see papyrus walking closer.
* quick, behind that conveniently-shaped lamp.
the human walks behind the lamp.
i create a shortcut just in time.
* sup, bro.
YOU KNOW WHAT "SUP", BROTHER!
IT'S BEEN EIGHT DAYS AND YOU STILL HAVEN'T...
FIXED. THE. SYSTEM!
wait, what?
YOU JUST WALK THROUGH THE WOODS EVERY DAY!
WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING?!
... ooookay?
* staring at this lamp.
* it's really cool.
* do you wanna look?
NO! I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THAT!
WHAT IF A HUMAN COMES THROUGH HERE!?
I WANT TO BE READY!
I WILL BE THE ONE! I MUST BE THE ONE!
I WILL CAPTURE A HUMAN!
THEN, I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS... WILL GET ALL THE THINGS I UTTERLY DESERVE! RESPECT... RECOGNITION... I WILL FINALLY BE ABLE TO JOIN THE ROYAL GUARD!
PEOPLE WILL ASK, TO, BE MY, "FRIEND?"
I WILL BATHE IN A SHOWER OF KISSES EVERY MORNING.
at least that is the same.
* hmm...
* maybe this lamp will help you?
SANS! YOU ARE NOT HELPING! YOU
WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SUCH A NUMBSKULL?!
and then he takes a breath and composes himself.
SIGH... JUST... GET HOME AND WORK ON THE SYSTEM, OKAY?
paps leaves.
this is... different.
after paps left i dispel the shortcut around the human.
the human is visible again.
the lamp no longer taking their place.
only an idiot would be fooled by standing just behind that lamp.
and paps is no idiot.
he is carefree and childish.
but not stupid.
* you can come out now.
carefully the human steps away from the lamp.
they have a closer look at the lamp but since there is nothing else, head towards the exit.
i give the usual speech about my papyrus needing some cheering up and head into the woods.
i remain at the lamp, the sentry station missing gives me some food for thought.
apparently i'm not a sentry here, but rather have some other job.
something to do with, what papyrus called "the system".
hmmmm...
the wind keeps whistling.
i put the headphones back on for a moment and press play.
it's a deep raspy voice and a catchy beat.
it doesn't rain down here.
but that would be nice.
the feeling of water drops falling from the sky...
i stop the music again. shouldn't have wasted as much time as i have.
a shortcut later i walk into the clearing with paps waiting in it.
HEADING HOME?
* yeah, thought it was about time.
GOOD, ESPECIALLY SINCE I HAVE SUSPICIONS A HUMAN MIGHT ARRIVE PRETTY SOON. UNDYNE HAS-
* do you think humans are soft?
where did that come from?
SANS, STOP BEING CREEPY!
* will try.
SO, AS I WAS SAYING ABOUT UNDYNE,
and then the human walks up to us.
we do the usual spinning and unbelieving look thing.
SANS,! OH MY GOD! IS THAT... A HUMAN!?
* uhhh...
* actually, i think that's a rock.
YES OF COURSE THAT IS A ROCK- COME ON SANS, YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS, LOOK THERE! RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE ROCK!
huh?
* oh yeah, didn't notice that.
* i guess we're off to a rocky start.
SANS, DON'T BE WEIRD IN FRONT OF THE HUMAN!
* already trying my best.
(I KNOW, AND I REALLY APPRECIATE THAT.)
BUT THAT MEANS I ALMOST HAVE IT. UNDYNE WILL... I'M GONNA... I'LL BE SO... POPULAR! POPULAR! POPULAR!
... 'AHEM' HUMAN! YOU SHALL NOT PASS THIS AREA! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WILL STOP YOU! AND CAPTURE YOU! YOU WILL BE DELIVERED TO THE CAPITAL! THEN... THEN!
papyrus glances at me.
I'M NOT SURE WHAT'S NEXT. IN ANY CASE, CONTINUE ONLY... IF YOU DARE! NYEH HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH!
with that papyrus storms away.
* that went well.
* don't worry kid.
* i'll be watching you.

with that the human made their way towards the next leg of their journey.
putting the headphones back on i press play again.
instrumental, can't really classify it.
sounds weird.
just like how i feel right now.
i just stand there, enjoying the music in the light breeze.
guess i should go head towards the electric maze.
the music off again i shortcut behind papyrus.
* heya bro.
QUIET SANS, THE HUMAN MIGHT COME AROUND ANY SECOND! I HAVE TO PREPARE MY WELCOME MONOLOGUE!
* but what about the traps?
oops, that was a bit off script.
THEY ARE OF COURSE CALIBRATED, JUST AS THEY SHOULD BE! AND STOP CALLING THEM ALL "HUMAN TRAPS"! THOSE ARE PUZZLES, WHICH IS FAR MORE SOPHISTICATED THAN MERE TRAPS! THEY ARE A DUEL OF WITS BETWEEN THE HUMAN AND ME! BECAUSE OF MY GREAT INTELLECT I WILL EASILY CAPTURE THEM WITH THIS!
and we're completely off script again.
no matter, i'll just wing it.
* well you could just as easily lure them with some candy.
OH GOD SANS! PHRASING! IF PEOPLE HEARD YOU THEY WOULD THINK THAT
the human walks in on us
YOU'RE SO CREEPY!
YOU ALWAYS SAY STUFF LIKE THAT!
* i just suggested that humans might like a bit of candy.
EXCUSES, EXCUSES!
papyrus notices the human and we turn around to face them.
OH-HO!
THE HUMAN ARRIVES!
IN ORDER TO STOP YOU...
I HAVE CREATED SOME PUZZLES WITH SOME HELP FROM MY BROTHER!
I THINK YOU WILL FIND THIS ONE QUITE SHOCKING!
FOR YOU SEE THIS IS THE INVISIBLE ELECTRICITY MAZE!
WHEN YOU TOUCH THE WALLS OF THIS MAZE
papyrus pulls the orb out of his pocket and holds it in his hand.
THIS ORB WILL ADMINISTER A HEARTY ZAP!
SOUND LIKE FUN? BECAUSE! THE AMOUNT OF FUN YOU WILL PROBABLY HAVE, IS ACTUALLY RATHER SMALL I THINK.
OK, YOU CAN GO AHEAD NOW.
i take a look at the field that is the invisible electricity maze.
pressure sensors are invisibly placed under the snow.
if something triggers them they send a signal to the orb and electrify it.
papyrus keeps talking about there being walls, but it's more abstract walls to him.
the human takes a few steps forward and i invisibly make shortcut under my foot.
activating the pressure plate papyrus receives a shocking surprise.
SANS! WHAT DID YOU DO? !?
* i think the human needs to hold the orb.
OH, OKAY.
with a smile he turns around to walk through the safe part of the maze.
but as i think about how this would ruin the puzzle i have a giant headache.
having learned my lesson i assume the local sans is unhappy with the idea.
a sans who doesn't prank his papyrus?
that's a first to say the least...
* hey paps.
WHAT IS IT?!
* how about you just throw it over?
* that's much quicker.
GOOD THINKING SANS! HUMAN, CATCH!
he throws the orb and it lands on the human's head.
OKAY, TRY NOW!
the human clumsily stumbles through the maze, touching down on the plates sometimes and being electrified.
it is en-lightening to say the least.
i can hear their little muscles spasm every time, smell burned hair and even hear faint sobs...
it's actually kinda sickening.
this humans is a pacifist.
they don't deserve this much...
i turn my headphones back on to drown out the noise...
it's not really a happy song but not really sad either.
the human keeps a stoic face while they struggle through it,
"I won't take the easy road, oh-ho."
yeah, you sure don't kid...
walking through here, bearing a LV of only 1?
it takes guts to walk the way of peace when the world wants you dead.
i always respect those who choose the hard road.
not that i ever chose it.
i was just thrown into this maelstrom of an adventure.
after some struggles the human drags themself out of the maze.
INCREDIBLE! YOU SLIPPERY SNAIL! YOU SOLVED IT SO EASILY... TOO EASILY! HOWEVER!
oh still got music on, can't understand a word of papyrus.
pause it and take the headphones off.
THE NEXT PUZZLE WILL NOT BE EASY! IT WAS DESIGNED BY MY BROTHER, SANS! YOU WILL SURELY BE CONFOUNDED. I KNOW I AM. NYEH HEH HEH HEH HEH!
paps moonwalks off into the distance.
the badly worn out human limps towards me.
they give me an inquiring look.
i give them the usual spiel about paps having fun and his battle body.
the human looks really battered...
they really should heal themself.
* you wanna have some candy?
i rummage through my pockets.
only pastry wrappers.
* i'd offer you a doughnut if i had one.
* but i can't see any around.
the human giggles.
whatever the reason the human seems amused.
fine by me.

i shortcut to my usual place "selling" fried snow.
the human tries to buy some and i just chill.
when i see the human walking towards the next puzzle i shortcut behind papyrus.
what welcomes me is a bigger shock than the missing sentry station.
it's a fully functional button puzzle.
you know the one.
you press a button and all lights surrounding the button toggle in their state.
before i can ask anything, papyrus, who was just busy with his mobile, turns to the human.
HUMAN! I HOPE YOU'RE READY FOR THE AMAZING ABILITIES OF MY BROTHER!
the human start playing with the switches.
i start listening to music again.
it's a light music that sounds like stars in space.
to this song the human just walking around looks rather dumb.
they should be gracefully dancing between the switches.
i close my eyes and tune out for a moment.
just drifting in the void between stars.
or what i think stars are.
i get torn away from my serene blackness by papyrus.
SANS! THE PUZZLE WAS FAR TO EASY! I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO MAKE A SLIDING TILE PUZZLE!
* nah bro, i always preferred those toggle puzzles.
yeah, as usual nothing can please him.
BUT THE SLIDING PUZZLES ARE SO MUCH HARDER! WHAT DO YOU THINK HUMAN?
they side with the sliding puzzles.
HA! HA! YES! HUMANS MUST BE VERY INTELLIGENT IF THEY ALSO PREFER SLIDING PUZZLES! NYEH! HEH! HEH HEH!
honestly?
those are harder.
but also harder to make.
i imagine this one just flips random switches at the beginning.
pretty easy to create.
no recalibration to make new puzzles.
it's pretty awesome now that i think of it.
lazy and at the same time still decent.

now is a short lull, as always.
i wait at the tile puzzle and prepare one of my more difficult spells.
that was, difficult before i had ages to perfect it.
i create a bone magic construct.
concentrate to get the anatomy right.
and presto, copy sans.
of course it's not really another me.
the only reason i do this at all is to have a good jump on the human.
watching out for them while also keeping an eye on papyrus.
well, that used to be reason.
way back when.
now i do it out of routine.
before i wrap the sans-ulacrum in shortcuts it needs to get dressed.
i reach back in my closet and pull out some clothes for it to put on and shortcut them onto it.
looking at the clothed doppelganger is even weirder than usual.
the clothes make him seem so... adult.
i notice the headphones are still on my head.
the music is off, so i pull them down around my neck.
the copy doesn't have them.
i hear papyrus coming near.
split second decision.
i keep the headphones on and the copy goes without.
papyrus would more likely notice them missing.
my copy at its place behind the spikes.
i shortcut to behind the tiles and move to my position.
papyrus runs over the tiles.
SANS! YOU HAVE TO CHECK THE COMPUTER BEFORE THE HUMAN...
gets over here, didn't talk to my copy.
i shortcut my copy to my room and dispel it.
i think about what usually happens with the tile puzzle.
headache.
as i thought.
IT'S THE HUMAN!
* (paps, i'll check the computer, you explain the puzzle)
(OKAY)
YOU'RE GONNA LOVE THIS PUZZLE!
mettaton playing computer just sits there.
* (be honest, do you even have a puzzle?)
silence.
* (be like that, i'll just code.)
i shortcut a keyboard and miniature holographic projector to me.
i've seen the way this works a thousand times.
i've looked at the source code of alphys.
she made the bulk of the hard and software to run this.
but usually mettaton designed the tile puzzles.
alphys was far too busy with the amalgamates.
or, at least in those where i looked into it.
might be more alternatives out there.
but this time i can just unrig it.
i have the knowledge to do it.
only need to code very fast.
i press play on the headphones and coding music starts.
i open a simple text editor.
the output expects a pointer to a six by eight byte array.
random function to assign each byte a random value.
so, now that it's randomized, i just need to find a way through it.
recursive?
yeah.
check if passable...
red returns false.
yellow returns false.
need the scent.
adding a boolean and setting it false.
if the scent is true and the tile is blue, returns false.
if the tile is blue, if any of the adjoined tiles is yellow, return false.
for current coordinates queue every reachable tile.
i have to kill endless loops...
but how do i save the coordinates?
and what about the scent?
hm...
maybe make the scent part of the function?
yeah.
add two more six by eight arrays but make them bool.
then check if coordinates are already checked in the scented array.
if not, set true and continue, if they already are, return false.
oh yeah, have to make special checks for orange and purple.
make it call the orange scented recursion in orange.
and for purple... urgh.
i need the direction where we came from...
no need to be efficient.
i'll just throw the origin coordinates in there as well.
good.
now instead of checking all of the other directions call the lemon recursion on the next one.
how?
current coordinates minus old coordinates should give the direction.
then add those to the current and recurse from there.
and return true if any of the recursion return true.
okay, what is missing?
ah yes, exit.
should return true if the human reaches the right side of the tiles.
putting it before the recurse.
if the current x coordinate is 7 return true.
well, except for all the way at the top.
make it that y is not 0.
okay.
wait what if there is a way to get stuck?
like a single orange tile that can't be undone?
how...
the human starts at position 0 3.
let's make it orange by default.
should make it so that every maze is solvable,
i look over the code.
goddamit.
did i forget anything?
maybe no green tiles?
yeah, scratch those for now.
i've got no idea what kind of monster the human would fight.
but with my luck it would be papyrus.
last check.
looks good.
compiling.
printing test random maze.
checking by hand.
solvable.
piping the output to the tile field generator.
once paps pulls the switch, it will replace the one mettaton gives us with a truly random one.
i turn the music off and make way for papyrus.
papyrus steps up to the computer.
WHEN I PULL THIS SWITCH, IT WILL MAKE A PUZZLE THAT HAS NEVER BEEN SEEN BEFORE! NOT EVEN I WILL KNOW THE SOLUTION! NYEH HEH HEH!
the computer whirrs to life and outputs a maze.
* (hope you didn't wait too long)
(WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? I JUST FINISHED MY EXPLANATIONS!)
* (okay, good)
bullshit.
i did not just code this whole thing while paps explained the tiles?
this is a bit much for me.
i need to unwind.
* (paps, is it okay if i go ahead and build a snowman?)
(OF COURSE SANS! I WILL JOIN YOU SHORTLY)
with that i walk out of the room and shortcut to the snowmen.

i put the headphones on again.
a slow beat.
sad.
i begin building a snow human.
this world is so weird.
the torso is a big lump of snow.
the scrapbooks are not like usual.
i give the snowman a head.
papyrus is not on about the laziness.
i could make it look like the human...
and then the strange clothes.
the torso shrink as i discard the snow.
all the puzzles not being just punchlines...
head is on there and it has legs and arms.
what is it with the missing sentry station?
maybe i can make them dance?
there is something i'm missing.
the snow human dances for me so pretty.
HELLO SANS, THAT IS A REALLY NICE SNOWMAN YOU'VE BUILT.
oh, it's papyrus.
* yeah, i've-
that face.
the look.
i've seen it before.
it is my look.
when i see papyrus being adorably stupid.
it's the look of someone who is responsible.
not papyrus.
that is not something a papyrus should have.
he shouldn't need to be responsible.
that is my job.
oh god.
the snowman collapses.
SANS ARE YOU ALRIGHT?
i run towards him and grab him at the battle body.
* papyrus... what have i done to you.
CALM DOWN SANS! YOU DIDN'T DO ANYTHING! I APOLOGISE IF I MADE YOU FEEL LIKE THAT! DO YOU NEED TO GO HOME? I THINK-
i scream.
i run and scream, shortcut to the lab and slump on my chair.
oh god.
what is this world...
what is with my head...
i can feel it...
my thoughts.. they run through my fingers like water...
i can barely stay coherent...
it jumps and stops...
my greatest tool...
useless...
i shouldn't be this... this helpless...
oh god...
i can't...
* Sans! What is going on?!
asriel had followed me.
* nothing...
* Doesn't look like nothing. Talk about it.
* what's the point?
* The point is that I care for you.
* doesn't matter. this sans is useless, i am useless...
* Oh god, this is... shit. You stay here and relax try to take your mind off of those thoughts. I'll try and salvage this run.
with that he is gone.
i numbly sit on the chair.
time feels like molasses as it slowly passes.
at one point i can't even sit anymore.
idly i waste away the time that i'm granted in this world.
doing nothing but walking in circles...
at one point i fall back in my mind.
i'm lost to the world forgetting that there even is one.

i stand on the wall of new home.
all is in flames.
i look down.
it's my usual hoodie.
* this was my world.
a voice speaks next to me.
it's sans.
he is wearing what i just wore.
* until you came and burned it all down.
* what are you talking about.
he turns to me.
eyes filled with rage.
* i didn't have a breakdown in YEARS.
* what-
he points towards the horizon, towards the skyscrapers.
* you just threw all that work away! they'll think i'm back to my old self! and all because you couldn't handle reality.
he turns to the skyline.
i can see that tears are running down his face.
* all i want is-
i get yanked out of the city.
back in sans' lab asriel is shaking my shoulder.
he wears... a shirt and the coat i had on?
what is going on here?
* Hey, get a grip, I've got to bring you and your body up to speed since we'll get booted from this universe in the next hour or so.

boring stuff
This one took longer than expected, used the February to wrap up a role playing campaign that ran for 3 years. Kinda broke my heart to burn the character sheets of those I mercilessly sacrificed to the gods of storytelling. But more in the finality than the character deaths. I'll miss the GM seat...

I don't want to mimic the "tortured artist" here but the whole arc will be, in great parts, how I experience the world.
I suffer from ADHD and while I am at times the quirky kind of person you see when television portrays my kind, with the being happy and bouncing around and being random, a great part of life is serious and I've never seen an accurate depiction of how that part looks like, so I'll try to do that with this arc.
This Sans suffers from it as well, a magical version that is more like a permanent spell.
I call the AU Squirreltale because squirrels and bad puns are the perfect combo.
Once this arc is over I'll probably do some more stories with him but more on the fun-loving end of ADHD.
/boring stuff

So, as usual here is your commentary:

At 8 hours per run and usually 2 runs until pacifist is reached, except in 20% of the cases where someone manages a pacifist with the right ending on the first try, 50 universes equals about a month in real time. That means that 600 universes is about a year.

The evidence he usually checks for are from easy to hard to find:
Proposal ring.
ID card to enter Alphys' lab.
Whether Alphys didn't tell the underground the fallen down monsters are still alive.
The 22nd log entry.
He usually just checks the ring and if it is there assumes Alice and if not, Basic.

Again I use Sans' established powers multiple times to explain what he does by using them in creative ways.
The whole "shadow" thing was actually really hard to explain since I needed a material that absorbs most light and not a source of darkness. So I just went with a really dark rock.
The "lamp" thing always bothered me. Everybody always plays it for the laughs and takes it at face value. Instead of going down that road I decided to take it serious and just have sans use his space warping powers to hide the human in plain sight.

Okay, this might need a bit of defence on my part but, Squirreltale Sans often sounds... creepy. But, that is all, the text is chosen to SOUND creepy while the intentions are pure. Now excuse me while I do perfectly normal non creepy things.

As you can see, I've changed the puzzles to be actual puzzles and challenging in Squirreltale.
The electric maze would be cruel if we didn't know the solution. Trial and error and every error is a painful shock.
Those push the button and lights change puzzles are actually simple once you know that pressing a button twice is the same as not pressing it. Plus, I love those puzzles.
The main reason I did this was for the tile puzzle since I thought to myself, making a random maze generator shouldn't be too hard. The whole coding section was done in "real time" as in, I tried to think of an algorithm that might be used to create and check such puzzles if they can be solved while i wrote the text. While I think I got it right I'd have to actually implement it and then check if it returns something wrong. Tell me if you think you found an error. It does take more than the 2 minutes Papyrus talks but sans can do it because of something special.

The songs he listens to are actually the result of me hitting shuffle on my mobile and then reacting to them like if I was Sans. I'll put the Songs here for reference and a bit of story behind them. And yes, I am aware that some of them do seem to run longer than the elapsed time in reality, just, bear with me.

Engrish Bwudd - Man Man
He hears this when he first starts to read.
A friend of mine chose this as the theme of their roleplaying character's nemesis, I liked it, sounds kinda circusy.

Fourth Floor - Cities Last Broadcast
First song after he stops reading, skips it quickly since he isn't in the mood for it.
I listen to The Humming Tape by Cities Last Broadcast when writing on Eldertale.

Ridicoulousness - Kyteman Orchestra
This is the song he listens to directly after, where he stands up and gets lost in his imagination.
I love Kyteman, but sadly he isn't that well known. This song is my personal theme for Deep!Sans, at least until Kyteman covers the Undertale soundtrack. And yes, I actually got it through shuffle, I love my mobile for that.

Make it Rain - Tom Waits
After the encounter with the human.
My girlfriend played that in the background while I was revisiting the scene, thought it was fitting.

Cordes Discords - Cosmic Analog Ensemble
Before going to the Electric maze.
One of the few failures of the experimental writing style. It's from the Tiny & Big Soundtrack.

My silver lining - First aid kid
During the sequence where the human struggles through the electric maze.
For those of you not aware, this is the end credits song from "Tales from the borderlands" episode 5. And yes, that is why I have it on my mobile. And again, yes, I got a halfway fitting music piece through shuffle.

Endless Story About Sun and Moon - Kai Engel
While the human solves the button puzzle.
Nothing much to say about this song except that, if I weren't so lazy it wouldn't be in this list. I am not a big fan of most of the songs Kai Engel writes and recently decided, I should clean up my playlist but, since am lazy, i didn't do it yet.

Starshine - Gorillaz
Directly before the big breakdown.
This... whoa this song is connected to a LOT of memories... none happy, all dear to me. Going back about a DECADE? Whoa I am OLD. I could tell you more about that but, it's rather long and, well, not for here. I might adapt it to a Squirreltale chapter though. I could not have chosen a better song to play right then myself...

And yes, boy scout Asriel says shit, this is NOT a typo. He just found the person he cares about the most in a state of absolute misery. Unlike anything he ever saw before.