Hello so another chapter here. So I read another story recently and noticed how choppy it seemed, but the author didn't really notice any of that at all. Anyway I'd just like to ask, does this come off as choppy and with no reasoning or can you guys follow along pretty well. I'm a new author so I'd like to know these things. You may or may not know, but my confidence to keep writing comes from the reviews, so do try to tell me your thoughts about how you feel the story is going.
Shout out to the reviewers who have showed their support, but another for those who told me their thoughts about the story like Call0013, TBM10, EmilyXaviera and DeanMerriman. I like that sort of participation and hopefully there will be more to come.
"How exactly do you think we should explain all this?" Grover asked.
"Don't ask me! You're the one who caused this mess!" Percy said.
"It's not like I could just leave them for dead! What else could I have done?" Grover argued.
"I'm not saying it was wrong. We'll just have to say it as it is." Percy sighed "I don't think it's even that bad, I doubt Mr. D will even care and Chiron will have his hands too full with all the new guys to even question you."
"Hopefully." He grumbled.
"It'll all work out, you'll see." Percy smiled.
They all walked past the borders and headed towards the direction of the Big House. Grover was leading the way, since Percy technically hadn't ever been here before. On their way there they drew a few odd looks and curious glances; by the time the time they'd gotten to the Big House they had a crowd following them.
They were greeted by Chiron in his Centaur form; he'd probably been informed of the ruckus they were causing.
"Ah Grover, who are you friends if I may ask?" Chiron asked calmly.
"Uh they're a few demigods I found on my way here. I didn't mean to bring so many, but one thing led to another. And you know…" Grover stuttered out lamely.
"Sounds like you had quite the adventure, how about I get these new campers sorted out and then you can tell me all about it later." Chiron said. "Now those of you not knowledgeable about Greek mythology please follow me while those who believe they are sufficiently informed of the Greek godly world may follow Grover for a tour around the camp."
Percy was the only one who'd stayed with Grover. They stood there for a moment thinking of what they should do.
"Well I probably go report to the Cloven Elders that I've already finished my mission. Coming?" Grover asked.
"Well it's not like I could go waking around by myself, I'm new remember?" Percy said while running in the direction of the Satyrs meeting grove.
"Hey wait up!" Grover called as he trotted after him.
They quickly made it to their destination. They had been full blown sprinting by the time they got to the Cloven Elders meeting grove.
"Ha, I beat you even with your head start." Grover puffed smugly.
"As. If. I. let. You win." Percy managed between breaths. His body condition was nowhere near what he liked.
"Grover!" they heard a rather familiar obnoxious voice yell. They turned to see a fat and old satyr trotting towards them.
"Leneus." Grover calmly replied nodding.
"Have you completed your mission correctly his time? None dead this time I hope?" Leneus rudely asked before turning to Percy.
"This Kid? He doesn't look like he could attract even the most weakest of monsters. Oh what's this? He doesn't even have a scent, are you sure you didn't just grab a clear sighed mortal? Wait until I tell the others this I'll have you kicked out this time for sure!" he said before dragging them both further into the forest.
"Silenus! Maron!" Leneus yelled while running.
"Quit screaming, you're waking up the whole forest. We're right here." A voice called out.
"Look what that Grover brought in. I told you we should have kicked him out sooner, tell me this kid isn't a mortal." Leneus said pointing at him.
"Huh, well he sure doesn't smell like a demigod." Silenus said giving him a sniff.
"See! What did I say? He thinks he could try tricking us bringing in a mortal to camp!" Leneus yelled excitedly. "This is definitely warranting an exile!"
"Let's hear what he's got to say first. Grover?" Maron said as a voice of reason.
"Ehem. I was going to tell you guys that while he definitely doesn't smell much like a demigod I've seen him do things that definitely hint at him being a demigod. Also when he gets really angry his scent is released for a brief moment." Grover explained.
"As if. Who would believe your lies?" Leneus cut in.
"I was going to ask Chiron if he knows why he doesn't have a scent." Grover said.
"Ha, so you're trying to garner Chiron's sympathy? Let's go see him then, even he won't defend you now." Leneus said trotting towards the big house.
The other two gave him strange looks, almost as if telling him he was digging his own grave. They quickly made it to the big house.
"Ah Leneus, Selinnus, Maron have we got another meeting? I'd think we would after what young Grover has done." Chiron said greeting the three not looking up from his game of pinochle with Mr. D.
"You bet we have, bringing in mortals! I say we kick him out." Leneus started.
"Mortals?" Mr. D cut in.
"Oh, My Lord! I didn't noticeyou there." Leneus apologized.
"It's fine, continue." The wine god drawled.
"Yes, this child has no scent, he's definitely a mortal." He replied.
"I see." Chiron said after a long pause and a few glances at the wine god.
"Woah! Can you believe it there's gods and everything." The teens that they brought said entering the room.
"Leneus, these children over here. Would you say they were all Demigods?" Chiron said gesturing towards them.
"Hm? Yeah they all have demigod scents. Why?" Leneus said after a sniff.
"No reason I just wanted to confirm something. So, you feel because he brought over this child with no scent he deserves to be exiled? Am I correct in interpreting that is what you appeared here for?" Chiron calmly asked.
"Yes. This is already his second time doing something like this. We said last time if he failed again he would be exiled with no searchers license." Leneus said red faced the other two nodding behind him in support.
"What if I was to say he brought in a few other demigods, some in that very group, would you feel that is enough to redeem him?" Chiron said sill not looking up from his game.
"Well, I guess so. That still doesn't mean he shouldn't be punished for sneaking a mortal in…" Leneus started.
"I have reason to believe the boy is a demigod. Is that enough to free him of punishment?" Chiron asked
"Maybe, but what proof do you have." Leneus said not giving up.
"Maybe I's because I have not felt anyone allowing anything mortal or otherwise inside the borders. Unless of course you believe that's not sufficient evidence?" Mr. D interrupted.
"Well?" Mr. D impatiently said after a moment of silence.
"O-of course not M-my lord" Leneus managed to stutter out frightened.
"I didn't think so, now we have reason to believe that there may be an influx of new demigods coming soon. Specifically because of the demigods Grover's brought in." Mr. D drawled.
"Chris, can you go get these demigods settled?" Chiron told the demigod who came in with them.
"Yes Chiron." The demigod said escorting the others out.
"Which ones did Grover bring in?" Maron Said as the others were exiting.
"All of them." Chiron answered then he looked up at Mr. D "Another win for me old friend."
"Ah, whatever. Another!" He said ignoring or maybe not noticing the shocked faces of the three satyrs.
"But there was like 15 of them! How could he have found so many at one time?" Silenus finally managed to finally break out of his shock.
"17 I believe to be the exact number. That is why we have reason to believe that we will be facing a massive influx of demigods. We were going to ask you to find as many as you could and bring them over as quickly as possible before harm comes to them." Chiron explained.
"This is serious. We'll get started right away." Maron said solemnly and the other two nodded just as serious before leaving.
"I believe you, young man, are here to find the reason for your absence of a demigod scent?" Chiron said. "I'm sorry to say, but I can't think of a reason at the moment. I'm sure you'll hopefully find out soon during your stay here though."
"I hope so." He said feigning sadness.
"Go along now, I'm sure you still haven't seen all there is to this camp. Maybe that might cheer you up." Chiron said.
"We'll get to it." He said dragging Grover with him.
"So long" Chiron said before starting a new game with the wine god across from him.
"See that wasn't too bad." Percy said as they exited the Big House.
"That was close." Grover said.
"Haha You worry too much, Goat boy." Percy laughed.
"Yeah well if I didn't worry so much you'd be dead by now. Besides when did you become so carefree? You used to be so paranoid about everything." Grover asked.
"I just feel this could be my chance to make everything so much better and I guess not carrying the weight of so many people's lives on your shoulders helps." Percy said relaxed.
"I think I know what you mean. I know I didn't have is as bad as you did, but being the one who'd been with you the longest they all turned to me when you weren't there or when you were busy or off on vacation." He added the last part with a glare. "And those moments were rather stressful."
"Thanks for that by the way, it seemed like other than Carter and his Sister none of the others could function without me or you being there to watch them, but I guess those were really stressful times. I couldn't imagine doing that all alone. That's why I took a few breaks here and there." Percy said gratefully.
"A few? You'd leave for months on end, I thought you'd died quite a few times you were gone for so long." Grover said.
"As if you would survive my death. You'd turn into a vegetable remember? Empathy link and all. Besides with how strong our link was at the time you'd be able to find me no matter where I went. Which makes me wonder why didn't you just do so when you got tired of babysitting?" Percy asked.
"I thought you needed the break. Besides I like to give you your privacy." Grover responded.
"Is that so? Then why was it that every time I was with about to get lucky with a girl you'd appear knowing full well how horny I was?" Percy asked punching his friend on the arm.
"Ha-ha I just thought you wouldn't want to get with someone without the deeper feeling and stuff. I know how you are about all that, we might've changed a lot, but I thought we shouldn't change that much." Grover said.
"Then why was it ok for you to do it? I swear you satyr's are just a horny bunch. You just wanted them for yourself." Percy said, but he couldn't help feel warm inside.
"I was always a horny fellow, that wasn't me changing it was just me being myself. Besides I honestly liked the girls I was with and stayed with them all. You didn't really have deep feelings for any of them." Grover said.
"Yeah? Than are you going to get with the same ones on this timeline too?" Percy asked.
"I'm not sure. I can't force I right? Many of them were from different pantheons, and had their own families there and if there's one thing we're doing this timeline it's stopping that from happening in the first place so unless you want me to drag them from their families it's probably not going to work out." Grover said with a sad sigh.
"You've got Juniper though." Percy pointed.
"Yes. I guess I do." Grover said with another sad sigh.
"if you keep acting like that you'll become an old man. Didn't you just say things were going to be different? What's the use getting all worked up about things that won't happen?" Percy said.
"Yeah. I'll definitely change that." Grover said with determination.
"That's the spirit, now how about we go have a spar? It's been a while and I miss kicking your butt." Percy laughed.
"Might I remind you I have the lead!" Grover said with a small smile playing on his lips.
"That's if you don't count the hundreds of other times I beat you and you used the excuse that you were still training. Besides now I don't have riptide and you don't have that giant ass sword." Percy shot back.
"Who's the one making excuses now?" Grover taunted.
"Say that after I kick your butt." Percy goaded.
While they were in the armory Grover suddenly attacked him.
"Hey, what's the big idea? We haven't even started yet Percy said blocking the oncoming attacks.
"Name a monster that has waited until you're ready? I thought so." Grover said with a laugh, not slowing his relentless attacks in the least.
"Isn't that just your excuse to try and beat me by cheating?" Percy replied.
"Already have your excuses ready don't ya Perce?" Grover taunted before jumping off both feat and surprising him by kicking him with his hooves.
"I didn't think you could pull that off so nicely yet." Percy groaned as he rolled away. He'd tried to get through the opening he knew was there, but had found two hooves planed on his chest.
"Ha that was shoddily done! Your body just couldn't keep up I bet." Grover mocked.
"Do I need to remind you I'm 9?" Percy shot back. He almost caught Grover with slash at his wrist.
"Excuses! When are you going to man up and admit I'm the superior swordsman?" Grover said dodging to his left.
"Hey! Newbie don't you know that you're not allowed to fight outside of the combat arena?" They heard an annoying shout.
They ignore the voice in favor of focusing on their duel.
"Don't make me split the two of you up." The voice said and continued to be ignored.
"That's it; I'll show you to ignore me whoa-" The person made the mistake of trying to join the hyper focused duos spar.
They lost their weapon- a spear- and were kicked to the side before they could even make a move.
"Stay" Percy started.
"Out" Grover continued.
"Of" Percy again stated.
"This" they chorused simultaneously both feeling rather annoyed.
The guy ran quite frightened and they continued on.
"Don't blame it on that guy if you lose. I don't wanna hear any of that 'I got old' nonsense. We didn't even stop fighting." Percy taunted.
"Ha we'll see who got cold when I beat yo ass" Grover laughed.
"I wanna see the day that happens. Maybe on that day Zeus will switch to a little pink suit too?" Percy sneered.
"Don't talk so big otherwise when you lose you are gonna sound that much dumber." Grover laughed.
"Great advice. Maybe you should use it for yourself." Percy derided.
"Ha, good one. I think I've read that in a history book somewhere." Grover jibed.
"I didn't know you even knew what a history book was." Percy countered.
"Well-" Grover started.
"That's them! They ganged up and beat me up after I told them they shouldn't be fighting outside the arena." It was that brat again it looked like he didn't know what was best for him and he was dragging his friends into it this time too.
"You two! What have you got to say for yourself? As the head of the demigod alliance I can't in good conscience let a member get beat up without repercussion for the assailant, but I also cannot be biased so I will hear you story." The new guy said.
That almost made the two of them pause. They didn't remember there ever being such a group before and the leader seemed to be sincerely morally upright too, which might have scored him points with either of the two at any other time, but unluckily for him he'd chosen this really bad time.
"Ignoring me are you? Goes o show my friend was not wrong, accept you punishment." Then he jumped into the fray.
He lasted the better half of ten second before he found two hooves on his chest and his sword gone from his hands.
"Ahh leader!" for all his whining the member who'd brought him here seemed to care deeply for his leader.
"I'll have the others assembled right away! I won't let them get away with this grievance!" He promised as he dragged his leader away with him.
"How could you kick that guy so hard, have you no shame? And after I had disarmed him too." Percy accused as the two left.
"Like I didn't see ready to finish him off with a sword blow to the head, I was giving him a little leeway to say we took him out with numbers, much less shameful than being beaten silly." Grover replied.
"I think they're bringing reinforcements, how about we call it a draw and explain ourselves?" Percy offered.
"Ha don't think I don't see you hands and legs tiring. Take this loss like a man." Grover shouted.
"I was just being nice and offering you a way out, but if you're not going to take it, it's you loss." Percy replied.
"Ha say that after you get beat up. It'll sound all the much sweeter." Grover laughed.
"There they are! If we don't avenge leader now we won't be able to raise our heads high and look him in the eye." They were interrupted again. This time with many more people, 20 more to be exact.
"We won't let you get away with this injustice!" the chorused.
Then they nobly ran to their demise. Most not even getting to properly understand their defeat before it had come.
"Just this once we'll call it a draw. I've lost motivation to keep fighting, with all he interruptions. Let's go try and settle this bunch down." Grover said.
"Sure, whatever." Percy replied.