CHAPTER FIVE: RUNNING SCARED

Four years ago

"Hey Misaki, how do you know those guys?"

Green eyes looked over towards her female friend whose curly blonde hair was matted and dirty from running around outside at lunch, "Who?"

"Nanase and Tachibana."

Misaki followed Azami's gaze to see the aforementioned boys seated in their desks on the opposite end of the room. At hearing his last name Makoto turned to see both girls staring at him. Instead of looking away he gave them a smile and a small wave. "We went to elementary school together," Misaki replied as she returned the smile.

Azami's face had flushed at being caught staring at the boys and her red face was now pointed at Misaki, "So you are friends with them?"

Misaki took a moment to allow the question to swim through her mind. Before Rin left she had spent her fair amount of time around the boys. Occasionally she would eat lunch with them and she'd make sure to say 'hi' to them but she wouldn't call them friends. Rin was her friend and Haruka and Makoto were just acquaintances. Once Rin left Misaki stopped eating lunch with them though that didn't deter Makoto from coming up to her every now and then just to see how he was. Haru would always be by his side, but he never said much.

Misaki bit her bottom lip as her eyes caught sight of the pink bracelet on her wrist. True to her word she had yet to take it off though it always made her a bit sad whenever she looked at it. "Kind of," the girl muttered as she pulled the bracelet in a circular motion around her wrist.

"They seem nice," Azami stated as she began tapping her pencil on her desk before another question popped into her mind. "Misaki," she whispered, leaning closer to the friend she had made just weeks before, "Which one do you think is cuter? Nanase or Tachibana?"

Misaki felt her cheeks grew warm as she sent a tentative glance towards the boys to make sure they hadn't heard Azami's question, "Why?"

Azami's voice stayed low as a grin came to her face, "Cause imagine how fun it'd be if we went on a double date! But since they're your friends you can pick which one you'd want."

Misaki had to stifle a laugh as she raised both eyebrows at her friend, "Why do you want a boyfriend so bad?"

"Like you don't," Azami accused, her eyes widening as Misaki's gaze shifted downwards and her cheeks flushed, "Unless….Misaki!" hands reached out and grasped onto her friend's desk, "Do you already have a boyfriend that I don't know about?"

Misaki let out a fake laugh as she tried to calm her racing heartbeat. She hadn't told Azami about Rin and as of now she had no intention of ever telling her. Azami wasn't a very good secret keeper and Misaki didn't want anyone else knowing about her and Rin's promise. "No," Misaki whispered, tucking a strand of black hair behind her ear.

"Then pick," Azami whispered, "If you could date Nanase or Tachibana which one would it be?"

Misaki felt her throat begin to dry but no matter how many times she swallowed it didn't seem to get better. The only person Misaki wanted to date was Rin, but she couldn't tell Azami about him. She also couldn't get out of this without answering since Azami would pester her until she did. Green eyes that had already begun to fade peeked past her friend to see the two boys chatting to each other, "Makoto," Misaki whispered watching as that cute smile came onto Makoto's face, "I'd date Makoto."

Misaki had been seeing Rin for tutoring three times a week for the past two weeks. Each hour session was less awkward than the last but there was an obvious wall between them- a wall Misaki didn't talk to anyone about. Nagisa, Rei, Azami, and Gou didn't even know that Misaki was getting tutoring- and she wasn't about to tell them. Haru knew about the tutoring but didn't seem to be that interested in her personal life so it wasn't like Misaki talked to him about it. The only one Misaki talked to about Rin was Makoto but she kept the conversations short as they usually occurred while he walked her to Samezuka after swim practice.

"Did you look at the study guide?" Makoto asked, referring to the math final study guide they had received in class today.

Misaki nodded her head 'yes' as she felt Makoto's hand rub up against hers. Instinctively she laced her fingers between his and pressed their palms together as they continued walking down the street. "I can do about…" Misaki paused, tapping her chin with her free hand, "Forty percent of the problems."

A long sigh left Makoto's lips as his head instantly dropped, "That's not very good."

"What are you talking about! That's like almost half!"

Makoto couldn't help but smile as he turned to look down at Misaki, "If you only did half of the problems on the final you'd get an F."

Misaki's eyes widened and jaw slacked as she threw her free arm up in the air, "I never said I was good at percents and stuff!"

"I'm sure you'll do fine," Makoto laughed, reaching his right arm across his body to pat Misaki on the head, "Just keep studying. How is that going by the way?"

"Good," Misaki's shoulders rose in a small shrug as she smoothed down the frizz Makoto had caused by touching her hair, "My homework grade has been going up."

A silence fell over them as Misaki knew that her answer wasn't what Makoto wanted. He didn't want to know how effective the tutoring was he wanted to know how things were going with Rin. He wanted to know if Misaki and Rin were friends again but Misaki not only didn't have an answer but she didn't want to talk about it. The past two weeks had been helpful math wise but difficult emotional wise. Every time Misaki was around Rin she was forced to deal with the ever growing elephant in the room. They never talked about their past or what had transpired in the years Rin was gone. Misaki never asked why Rin stopped writing her or why he didn't come see her as soon as he was back in town. Rin never asked why Misaki broke her promise and started dating Makoto. Instead they talked about the slope intercept formula while they both snuck glances at each other. They rarely talked about anything other than math for fear that they would slip into conversations about the past. Fear that everything they were hiding would reveal itself.

"That's good," Makoto's smile hid his disappointment in her answer as his gaze settled on Samezuka Academy, "I'll see you tomorrow."

With one swift movement Makoto's lips were on Misaki's giving her a single kiss before he began walking away. The rest of the journey into Samezuka had become routine. Walk towards the back of the campus, make a right, the dorms will be right there, go inside and take the stairs up to the second floor, take a left and Rin's room was three doors down and on the right. Misaki would then knock and Rin would open up and they'd begin, but today he didn't answer the door. Instead Misaki spent five minutes knocking, ten minutes pacing, and finally sat down near the door to wait for another twenty minutes.

Low pings emitted from Misaki's phone as she played Candy Crush, her butt on the carpeted ground and her legs stretched out in front of her. Her mind was so involved in the game that she didn't hear the soft creak of the door near the stairs. She didn't hear the first few footsteps but a loud 'Yo!' certainly caught her attention.

Misaki's nerves jolted at the greeting, the phone dropping into her lap as one hand rested over her heart, "You scared me!"

"Swim practice went over."

Misaki listened to Rin's reason for being late as she was putting her phone back into her backpack. Her eyes had yet to look up at the red head who was unlocking the door before he placed his hand right in front of Misaki's face. Misaki slid her hand into his, allowing him to help her to her feet as she mumbled a thanks. Once she was upright she found herself standing very close to a very shirtless Rin. Hazel eyes moved from his chest down to his abdominals and then back up again. She noticed the unzipped Samezuka jacket which kept his broad shoulders and muscular arms out of view. Eyes scoured over Rin's chest as Misaki gulped down a shaky breath and pulled her hand out of his

"Why are you still in your swimsuit?" Misaki asked as her eye flicked down to the black and red swimwear before snagging on his toned stomach once more.

"I just told you- swim practice lasted longer than expected."

"Still don't get why you're…" Misaki trailed off wanting to add in 'half naked' but not really wanting to verbally point it out.

Rin let out a gruff laugh reaching down and placing two fingers beneath Misaki's chin, "My face is up here," he taunted as he lifted her head and gave her a smirk.

"Oh s-shut up!" Misaki jerked her face away and walked into the door room, her cheeks burning and heart racing.

Without being told Misaki began taking out all her math stuff and placing them on Rin's desk. She also pulled over Rin's roommate's desk chair so both her and Rin could sit at the desk. "I got my final review today," she said, flipping through the five stapled pages that were filled with problems, "I think we should go over the ones I have no idea how to do first."

"Okay but I have to shower."

Misaki's eye widened as she dropped the study guide on the desk, "Now?"

"Yes now," Rin replied, slipping off his jacket and throwing it on his bed, "Just start on the review."

Misaki once again found her shamelessly staring as Rin raised his arms over his head, small popping sounds coming from his muscular back. It was an uncontrollable stare, an uncontrollable feeling of finding Rin ridiculously attractive. Everything about him made Misaki's blood burn and her pulse race though she had desperately been trying to ignore it over the past two weeks.

"When's your final?"

Rin's question snapped her out of her trance as she averted her gaze back down to the desk, "Next Friday."

Misaki waited for the response that she didn't hear because her attention had been diverted. Eyes focused on the glistening silver that hadn't been there last time she was over. In fact it hadn't been there over the past two weeks but now she saw it. It was peeking out from underneath two pieces of paper, as if Rin had tried to hide it but failed. Misaki instantly wondered where he had been hiding it before letting it sink in that he still had it. Right hand reached out to touch the small bird pendant before pulling the necklace out from its resting place and hanging it off of her index finger.

"You kept it," Misaki didn't want to cry. She had managed to not cry since she saw Rin but this was too much, "My necklace," she croaked, watching as it slowly swung from her finger.

"I promised I'd take good care of it, and I keep my promises."

It was low and it hurt like hell. The way that Rin's words were like a dart aimed straight for Misaki's heart. They hadn't talked about the promises they made when they were kids, all they had been talking about was math. They acted like strangers but the tension between them spoke to more. The unsaid anger, the hidden sadness, and the obvious attraction that they had for each other. The way Rin's hand once 'accidently' ran over her thigh. The way Misaki's eyes drank in everything about Rin before her mind drug her down into a pit of guilt. A pit filled with thoughts of how Rin could be hers. Of how she wanted him to be hers but she shouldn't feel that way. She had a boyfriend, a wonderful boyfriend but late at night as Misaki played over her moments with Rin she came to the horrible conclusion that no matter how much she loved Makoto- he would never be Rin.

"I'm sorry," the words were strained and choked by the tears that ran down Misaki's cheeks. She wanted to say more. Like how she was sorry to Rin for breaking the promise. How she was sorry to Makoto for feeling this way. How she was sorry for the situation she was in and sorry that she wasn't emotionally stronger.

"Misaki-"

"I'm fine," Misaki lied, placing the necklace down as she wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, "This is just it's…it's harder than I thought I'd be."

A low sigh left Rin's mouth as he pushed his hair back, "I know."

"I wish I'd done things differently," Misaki whispered resting her weight on the desk as he let her head hang and hair cling to her face as tears still streamed, "I wish I'd waited."

It came out softly, a silent secret that wasn't meant to be spoken but once it was out it began wreaking havoc. It caused Rin's throat to close and his breath to become lodged. It caused immeasurable guilt to build upon Misaki as she beared the weight of her statement on her shoulders. Rin watched as Misaki shook from tears and regret and he wondered if he had just heart her correctly. She wanted to wait for him. She wanted him. Rin swallowed hard as he closed the gap between them, placing a strong hand on her shoulder in order to spin her around. Her body collapsed into his chest, tears rolling down his bare chest as Misaki sniffled and tried to get it together.

Rin felt her cold tears against his warm skin as he loosely held onto her shoulders, "Me too," he mumbled and immediately Misaki was pushing herself away from him.

"Ugh I'm being ridiculous!" she nearly shouted as she frantically rubbed her eyes, mascara and eyeliner smearing onto the backs of her hands, "It's not like we can change anything so-"

"Yes we can," Rin growled his fists balled up at his sides, "Misaki," his voice softened as he let out a long breath and something in his eyes changed.

Misaki had seen that look before. She had seen it in those green orbs right before he gave her her first kiss. Right before he leaned in and placed a strong hand on her cheek and pressed his lips on hers. Seeing that look in Rin's eyes caused her heart to beat furiously and it was only made worse as he took a step towards her. She could understand him being frustrated. Misaki understood just wanting to say 'fuck it' and give in to what they obviously both wanted- each other. But it wasn't that simple. It wasn't something Misaki could bring herself to do so instead she did the only other thing she could think of.

She ran. She picked up her backpack, leaving her math folder on the desk, and ran. She ran down the hallway and bolted down the stairs but Rin didn't chase after her instead all he could do was whisper her name before furiously punching his desk.

Author's Note: I really wanna grab Rin and Misaki, sit them down, and force them to talk out their problems but they are just too darn stubborn which leads to emotional outbursts like this.

Marionette-Rui: Here's the next update! It came out faster than I expected (like way way faster) but thanks so much for reviewing and I'm happy you like it! :)