SIDE NOTE: I couldn't resist putting a Milton Armitage joke in there. It needed to be done.

Not that Maynard ever really paid much attention in Mr. Pomfritt's English class, but today was especially hard. Thankfully, he wasn't the only one. Dobie looked bored and listless, Zelda looked frazzled, and Kate looked as if she was a million miles away. It was enough to distract anyone.

"Ms. Osborne? Uh, Kate?" Mr. Pomfritt called, and Maynard knew she was in trouble.

"Yes, Mr. Pomfitt?" she responded in a monotone, still looking straight ahead, causing numerous chuckles from their classmates.

"Are you with us today, Ms. Osborne or would you rather be somewhere else?" he asked before realizing what he had said. "You know what? Don't answer that."

Before anything else could be said, the bell rang and Maynard noticed that everyone rushed out the door, except for he, Zelda, Dobie, and Kate.

"Um, Kate; may I see you for a moment, please?" Mr. Pomfritt asked, adjusting his glasses.

Kate walked forward, but no one else made a move to leave. Even Dobie knew something was wrong.

"Kate, I couldn't help but notice that Chatsworth isn't here, and while you're here physically, it seems as if you might as well be wherever he is. That's not like you."

"I'm sorry. It's just that Chatsworth wasn't feeling very well and I'm a little worried about him. I promised to check on him at lunch."

"Oh, well I'm very sorry to hear that," he told her softly. "Please send him my get well wishes."

"Thank you," she whispered before numbly walking out.

"Hey, Kate, what's wrong with Chatsworth? You didn't tell us earlier that he was ill," Zelda questioned.

"Yeah. And like how contagious is he?" Maynard chimed in, noticing Dobie was still following, though saying nothing.

"I don't know. He was having really horrible stomach pains. I've never seen him look so bad," Kate replied.

"Well, go on home and check on him. We'll catch you up on what you missed in class," Zelda offered.

"I-I can come with you, if you want," Dobie suddenly interjected.

Kate spun around to face him. "I wouldn't want you to disappoint your adoring fans," she spat before turning back to Zelda. "Thank you, Z. You're the best."

Maynard watched her go and felt a lump in his throat. She was really worried about her cousin. Kinda like how he and Dobie used to worry about each other. It made him get all misty-eyed. But when he turned around to look and see if Dobie was feeling it, too, he was gone. So much for that.

Kate drove home as quickly as she could and flew past Trembly before she knew he was there. Instantly, she backed up. "Trembly, how is he?"

"He's still not feeling well, Miss Kate. He's upstairs in his quarters."

She patted his arm. "Thank you, Trembly." Even with being worried, she wanted Trembly to know he was appreciated. Considering Chatsworth and Auntie Mumsy usually just barked orders at him, she always made sure she was more courteous and polite. Besides, Trembly usually would return her graciousness by slipping her candy bars so that she could feign not being hungry on nights they would dine on calamari.

"Anytime, Miss Kate," he responded before she dashed off.

"Chatsworth, are you awake?" she asked softly, knocking on his door before opening it. When she saw that his bed was empty, she could feel anger start to bubble inside her, but seconds later, she heard the sink in his bathroom and exhaled. While she waited on him, she decided to look around his room. Tons of awards he had won for polo, tennis, croquet, drag racing, judo, and even swimming were lined up on his massive shelves, and his telescope was set up near his window. He told her he loved looking at the moon and stars, but she knew he also enjoyed watching Sherri Fontaine swimming laps in the outdoor pool when her family came for visits. Looking over on his bedside table, she smiled as she saw a half-consumed cup of tea, some crackers, a framed photo of she and him, and his over the top lamp with its long fringed shade. Out of the corner of her eye, on the floor, however, she saw what looked like a bottle. Picking it up, she gasped as she recognized it: the same pills Dobie had ordered! Her hands unsteady, she managed to open it and find that some of the pills were missing. "Oh dear. Oh, worms and snakes; why, why, why?"

Chatsworth came out of the bathroom, still looking pale and sweaty, in his silk robe. "Is it lunchtime already?" he asked weakly.

"Chats, you care to explain what these are doing in your room?" she ignored him, holding the bottle in front of his face.

Chatsworth looked at her guiltily and sighed. "They are indeed mine, dear cousin. I found an advertisement for them in the trash," he stopped to shudder at the last word, "and so I decided to order some and show that Dobie Gillis that he messed with the wrong fellow."

"You have got to be kidding me. These pills are dangerous, Chatsworth! That's why you have such a bad stomachache."

"It is?" Chatsworth asked, slowly going back to the bed. "How pray tell do you know that?"

Kate glowered. "Just trust me."

"Well, it's not fair! Gillis baby stole my girl and suddenly, he's Mr. Popular. I, too, wish to be well-received and those pills promised just that."

"This Doctor Fritzbaum is a quack. There is not a special formula that can come in a pill form that will suddenly make everyone like you. I wish you and Dobie could understand that."

Chatsworth clutched his stomach but raised an eyebrow at her. "What do you mean by that?"

Kate sighed and sat down on the bed, explaining how her and Zelda found the advertisement and the pills. "He thought they would work, too."

"But Katie-Cuz, they are! Gillis is more popular than ever before!"

"It's not because of the pills. He thinks that's why, but Zelda and I switched them with breath mints. If he had taken the real thing, he would be in bed sick, just as you are."

Chatsworth looked down, ashamed. "I see. Oh, Katie baby, I'm sorry. I promise never to take another worthless pill ever again."

"Well, hopefully tomorrow, you will feel well enough to go to school. We all need to have an intervention with Gillis-baby—I mean Dobie—and tell him the truth. And the consequences."

"Right you are. I wouldn't wish this pain on anyone. Not even Dobie Gillis."

Kate smiled. "Not even our old adversary and cousin Milton Armitage?"

"Well now, that's debatable, Katie-Cuz," he replied before they both laughed.