(A/N: Hey all! I've recieved numerous requests to do another crossover. So in this chappie, you'll get your wish! READ ON AND ENJOY! I COMMAND YOU!)
The next few hours were uneventful.
If you don't count the min-brawl for first dubbies on the bathrooms to wash off all the blood, nothing much happened.
Akane had nodded off on the sofa while watching T.V. and icing down her shoulders.
Her legs sprawled across Takaomi's lap, who was also asleep and her head on Suo's bicep, also half asleep with a dead baby in his arms (figure of speech; never fear!)
The whole dislocating-relocating of her shoulders was a rather painful process and as Akane almost never allowed her opponents to get in close proximity, she rarely had to use this technique.
Before she dozed off, she made a mental note to practice it a bit more often.
This time around it had hurt like a bitch.
Mannen and Kazuo were on the floor, overturned Chinese takeout boxes strewn about them.
They too had zonked out, but had done so while eating everyone else's leftovers.
Kazuo was currently snoring loudly through a mouthful of noodles and Mannen though half a box of Mushu pork (how're they not suffocating?)
The Ouran Host Club, after unanimously agreeing to toss out Operation Defrost, had retired to their rooms and had made like the Fucked Up Five and had gone to bed early.
Tamaki was half in, half out of bed.
His top end hung upside down while drool ran down his face and into his ear.
Hikaru had fallen asleep while undressing, so he was currently wearing one sock, boxers and his shirt half way off around his neck and left arm.
Kaoru had konked out while reading a magazine in an easy chair.
His legs were draped over the right arm his head and shoulders slung over the left, his arm aswinging.
Hunny was curled up into an itsy bitsy ball, sucking his thumb and cuddling Bun-Bun, sleeping deeply.
Occasionally, he let loose a wild yell and kicked the air above his head violently before curling up again contentedly.
Mori slept peacefully, he didn't toss or turn and he didn't do any martial arts or sleep in any strange positions.
The same couldn't be said for Haruhi and Kyoya.
They were both unbelievably fitful sleepers and spent the entire night tossing and turning so violently that Haruhi fell out of bed and spent the rest of the night on the floor and Kyoya knocked over his nightstand and awoke the next morning with a sprained ankle.
"It doesn't look too bad Kyoya." Hinode said tentatively as she switched off the melted bag of ice to examine the swelling.
"Yeah, it could've been worse." Sora nodded, handing a new bag of ice to Hinode quietly.
Why quietly?
Because while the Ouran Host Club is up, the Freakish Fiveis not. They're still out like lights in the living room.
And as they had learned from experience, they are DEFINITELY not morning people.
"Why in th' hell does my neck hurt so bad?" Kaoru muttered, trying unsuccessfully to rid himself of the crick in his neck (that's whatcha get fer sleeping in a chair, dumbass.)
"Dunno." Hikaru murmured, "But I've gotta tellya about this dream I had. It was effed up! I was bein' strangled t' death by my bed sheets!" (undress properly before you konk out retard!)
"Well I myself had a falling dream." Tamaki stated, "Dreadfully frightening don't you know." (….don't…get me started)
"Really?" Haruhi asked, "I had a dream about cliff diving." (…this is just getting sad.)
"I dreamt I was in the middle of my first judo final!" Hunny cried enthusiastically from his piggyback position on Mori's back (…oooookay)
As the Ouran Host Club continued to compare and contrast dreams, the sound of a car engine pulling into the drive ripped all five half siblings awake.
"Abuh?" Akane blinked blearily, pushing herself upright and wiping away a thin line of drool as she glanced out the window, "Who th' hell could tha…HUHHHHHH!"
Her loud gasp made everybody jump about twelve feet in the air and Aki begin to wail.
"Whuh th' hell?" Mannen groaned shooting upright and hitting his head on the coffee table.
"Uhhh…god….Suo, make'm shudduuuuup " Kazuo moaned, rolling over and smooshing a container of half-eaten eggrolls.
"WAHDOHWAH!" Takaomi screeched, flying spastically off the sofa and onto Kazuo.
"Shhshhshh…please calm down for daddy….please?" Suo begged of his hysterically sobbing son.
Akane had already leapt to her feet and dashed outside shouting:
"PAPA! JE NE CROIX PAS!"
"Do we wanna know what's happening?" Haruhi asked blandly, not looking up from her magazine.
"Probably not." Kyoya said serenely.
"But are you gonna look anyway?" Sora grinned.
"Definitely yes." Hinode smiled knowingly.
"Because humans are naturally curious creatures." Tamaki said passionately.
"That, and you just can't he yerself." Hikaru and Kaoru snickered, "Nosey little bastard, aintcha milord?"
Tamaki blushed as Hunny and Mori made their way over to the window.
"HEY! They're TWO Akane's!" Hunny squealed as Mori nodded in agreement, eyes widening slightly in disbelief.
"What?" Kyoya said mildly, "That is impossible, Hunny."
"But it's TRUE!" Hunny cried, hopping off Mori's back so the tall teen could cross the room to collect Kyoya, "LOOK!"
From his spot in Mori's arms, the bespectacled teen's jaw dropped as he beheld Akane and her maledoppelganger talking in fast fluent French.
"Hm?" Hinode said mildly, coming up behind the group, "Hey, what's Aka-chan's dad doing here?"
"Yeah, isn't it kinda dangerous for him to be in the country?" Sora asked no one in particular.
"Wow…easy to tell who she took after, huh?" Haruhi whistled.
"No kiddin'." Hikaru snickered.
Tamaki rounded on the Otaku Twins.
"Her father is French?" He asked eagerly, excited at the prospect of finding another konketsuji.
"Mm-mm." Sora replied, shaking her head violently, "He's been living for the past fifteen years in Paris and Akane's a bilingual...lucky bitch."
"Oh." Tamaki mumbled, face falling a little…before refilling with curiosity, "Why in France?"
"Because Kakyoin-san is the boss of one of the most prominent yakuza's in Japan." Takaomi replied, entering the room, "The Crazy 88."
Suo crossed the threshold the room, Aki toddling in after him, gripping his father's index finger.
"He has so many hits on his head, that he fled the country and runs his syndicate from Paris." Suo drawled.
"It must the time of the year where the bosses come together for their annual meeting." Hinode mused.
"Mm-hm." Sora, nodded, "When they come together to talk things over rationally; no funny stuff."
"Wait…she's related to a…well that explains a lot." Kaoru snorted, shaking his head.
"And it looks like she's following in her daddy's foot steps huh?" Hikaru snickered, "What with her bein' a gang leader 'n all."
"Not to mention th' Yakuza System works a lot like a dynasty." Mannen said shrewdly joining his brothers at the window with Kazuo at his heels.
"Yeah." Kazuo muttered, "So when her old man bites it, Akane takes over. Automatically. Sucks t' be her. She doesn't want all that responsibility. Hell, she wouldn't have taken back her position as Byakko if they hadn't begged her…literally, on their hands an' knees for her t' come back."
The Ouran Host Club watchedfrom above as the pair below hugged a final time as the male of the two got into his Rolls Royce and pealed out as Akane waved at it's retreating form.
As it disappeared from sight, Akane whipped her head around and looked straight up at them.
"HEEP!" Tamaki and Hunny squealed.
Hikaru and Kaoru jumped back.
"Eh-heh-heh-heh-heh." Hinode, Sora, Takaomi, Suo, Mannen and Kazuo chuckled nervously, waving hesitantly at the midnight blue haired teen whose lilac eyes were narrowed in spite.
In response, she flipped them the bird with both hands and strode into the house.
And it was at this time Suo let loose ayell that almost made Mori throw Kyoya into the ceiling.
"WHERE'S AKI?" He bellowed (you mean you didn't notice he wasn't clinging to you like the little leech that he is? for shame.)
And where was Aki?
Why the clever little tot had managed to toddle his way into his father's lab and was now punching random buttons on the Transdimensional Remote (affectionately dubbed the Remote Of Doom by Akane), laughing his head off each time they made a sound.
Before anyone quite knew what happened, the Ouran High School Host Club had vanished completely.
"WAH! WHERE'D THEY-!"
-BLP-
-and Hinode, Sora and the Questionable Quartet disappeared with a pop.
-BLP- "I-I don't believe it." Tamaki murmured in a hushed voice as he gazed around the familiar room.
"…we're home." Mori muttered (HE SPEAKS!) setting Kyoya down on the chaise lounge.
"I better call dad!" Haruhi cried, "He must be worried sick!"
"Us too!" The Hitachiin Twins yelped, "Our 'rents must be throwing a conniption by now!"
"Hunny's mama and papa too!" Hunny cried, leaping onto Mori's awaiting back.
There was a mad dash for the phones while Kyoya calmly extracted his own cell from an inside pocket in his jacket and dialed his house.
"Yes, can you arrange to have someone pick me up please?…thank you."
"…man it got quiet all of a sudden." Akane muttered nervously, fingering the trigger of her .425 Casull Taurus Raging Bull Revolver and shouldering the new firearm her father had presented her with: a H&K416 Enhanced Carbine.
She had so many concealed weapons on her right now, that getting through customs was a far off dream.
She strolled through the house, listening intently…til she heard it.
Aki's laughter coming from down the hall.
She dashed down the hall, more than a little unnerved, waves of apprehension gushing down her spine and darted through the doorway of Suo's lab…
…to see too her horror what Aki had gotten his mischievous little hands on.
"AKI, NO!" Akane screamed rushing for him, wrapping an arm around her nephew as he pressed another button.
-BLP-
-and everything was gone.
-BLP-
Then everything returned...but it wasn't the comfortable surroundings Akane had grown up in.
Lush forests surrounded her on all sides save for a lone, well worn path etched in the earth.
The clear blue sky smiled cheerfully down from above, winking between the dark green leaves and the sunlight danced along the ground.
"Whuuut th' hell?" Akane blinked, Aki in her arms, remote in her hand as she took in the unfamiliar landscape, "WHAT'S GOIN' ON HERE?"
(A/N: Where has everyone been skyrocketed to this time? Guess right an you'll get a cookie! R&R!)
TRANSLATION:
"PAPA! JE NE CROIX PAS!"- "DAD! I DON'T BELIEVE IT!"