-1Chapter 9: Blonds just wanna have fun
Once again, to my social studies teacher. And I do not own twilight.
Alice: wow. Bella, don't you think that's the look for Edward?\
Bella: you were so right. Man purses do add the right touch to any outfit.
Edward: ha-ha. You've had your fun now cut it out.
Jacob: awww!!! But you haven't tried on the kilt or the yellow satin pants.
Edward: you are so died?
Jacob: was that a threat? You are so in for it. Girls?
Girls: hmmmm..?
Jacob: Don't you think Edward would look good as a blond?
( collective gasps)
Alice: Why didn't I think of it before?
Bella: I just don't know Alice. I can't picture him as a blond.
Alice: Trust me, you'll love it.
Edward: hello? unwilling victim here.
At the Saloon
Alice: alrighty!! Jacob why don't you say with Edward to make sure he, eh, doesn't give any one any problems. Bella, you and I will be getting pedicures.
Bella: sweet.
Alice and Bella settle into chairs and dip their feet into bubbling water. A women enters the room.
Women: I'm sorry but there'll be a bit of a wait. If you'd like you can have your fortunes told while you wait.
Bella: come on Alice, that sounds fun
Alice: Yeah, sure
Just then a middle age women, that was extremely small, entered the room. She wore, of all things, a pirates costume and had a fake bird ( I think it was fake) on her shoulder. She is completely crazy. We shall call her crazy pirate lady.
CrazyPiratelady: hello mattes!! Enjoying the water?
Bella: errr...yeah?
CPL( I'm lazy and get tired of writing out her full name): That's good, now I'm guessing your wondering why I'm dressed like a pirate.
Alice: I might have asked myself that.
CPL: I'm a chain smoker
Alice: sure...
CPL: I have six toes.
Bella: what does that-
CPL: So I'm guessing you want a reading?
Bella: That'll be great
They both hold out their palm.
CPL: NO!NO! I only read your feat!
Alice: why? ( whispers to Bella) I'd like to see any of her predictions come close to mine, the poor senile thing
CPL: Where else to find out about your past and future then your sole?
Bella: ha-ha sole! Get it Alice? Sole! Did you get it?
Alice: yeah, I got it Bells.
Bella: Do mine first, please
CPL: sure.
She reaches into the tub and grabs Bella's foot. Bella giggles. CPL traces the lines on the bottom of her of her feet and tickles her.
CPL: Awwwwwwww...I see now.
Alice: Please share your wisdom with us ( whispers) you crazy old bat.
CPL: Your reading has told me you are a witch and you have lost your powers. Is this right so far.
Bella: uhhhhhhh...maybe?
CPL: I can, of course, tell were you can find help.
Bella: sure. Tell me then.
CPL: You'll have to travel to see your grandmother Beth, who will have many answers for you.
Bella: I don't have a grandmother Beth.
CPL: That's what you think.
Alice: Don't listen to her Bella, she doesn't know what she's talking about.
CPL: OH REALLY? YOU THINK SO?
She plunks Bella's foot back into the tub and whipped out Alice's.
CPL: Lets see now. Your name is Alice Cullen, your have three siblings ( not including Bella), your a shop-a-holic, you find your husbands emo-ness attractive, you're immortal, and you have a perverse fear of dairy products.
Alice: uhhhhhhh...
Bella: ( giggles) Stay back Alice, I have a cheese stick in my purse.
Alice: uhhhhhhhh...Bella, lets get out of here.
They pay or their fortune, and go to get the boys.
Bella: Hay, Jacob, is he done yet?
Jacob: Yeah, all the hairdressers are taking turns washing his hair now.
Bella: ummmm...right. Alice, go get your brother.
Alice goes and retrieves one very soaked but blond brother.
Alice: I told you he's look good.
Bella: You were so right. I have to make a phone call before we deicide were to go from here.
Once again, any suggestions are welcomed and please review. OR ELSE!!!!!