HANAYUKI FOREVERRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The song you're about to read is originally mine. So please…be nice…
Chapter 23: If I Cry
One of the advantages of a great sorrow is that nothing else seems painful
Giacomo Casanova once said that. Yuki vaguely wondered if the infamous womanizer, spy and adventurer felt so much grief in his life that nothing else seemed painful. What could have caused it? If he were to come across this line in his history book before…before everything became complicated…he would have thought of him as discontented. He had everything a normal man could ever want and yet he speaks of such a sorrow.
But Yuki understood completely what Casanova meant. It was not discontent for him. It was not the need for better things…it was the loneliness, the feeling of emptiness inside…the irony of having it all but lacking everything that's actually worth anything. Loneliness…
He looked at himself in the mirror, a soft tune playing from the radio at the corner of his room. He sighed. Of all the costumes to make him wear, Ayame just had to choose an angel. He would have accepted wearing the all white tuxedo, since it wasn't so bad. But the large white wings were ridiculous and embarrassing. He could just see the twinkle of admiration in the fan club members now. That was the last thing he wanted to see.
"YUKI-KUUUNNNN!!!!" Ayame's voice reverberated through the walls, making Yuki cringe. "ARE YOU FINISHED YET OR DO YOU NEED YOUR BIG BROTHER TO COME INSIDE AND HELP YOU INTO THOSE CLOTHES?!"
He slammed the door open, his eyebrow twitching at his brother's perverted invitation. "Stop shouting already, you're giving me a headache." He muttered, coming down the stairs and walking to the living room where he knew everyone was in.
Upon coming to the doorway, he couldn't help but stop and stare at the sight of Tohru in a beautiful pink dress with poofy layers and ribbons. She looked like a real princess with her hair braided to the side. Just like how Hana-chan did it. Damn it. He had to stop thinking about her.
He already gave her his word he wouldn't be bothering her anymore. He shouldn't…
But…
Thinking about her wasn't a crime, was it? He wouldn't be bothering her if he just thought of her, would he? Of course not…
"Oi! Quit starin' at her." He was snapped back into reality, only to see a blushing Tohru averting her gaze from him. He turned around to the voice and found that Kyou was right behind him, looking irate. "Jeez, you damn nezumi! You're even more perverted than that damn dog."
"I was simply appreciating Honda-san's appearances, Kyou. It's about time somebody appreciated her like how she deserves."
"What're you tryin' to say, huh?"
"That's not true, Yuki-kun!" Shigure butted in, looking away from his tea cup. "I appreciate our little flower all the time! How dare you say I don't appreciate her!"
"I wasn't talking about you." Yuki muttered, while Kyou yelled at him, "Don't butt in, pervert!"
"A-Ano…" Tohru interupted, blushing and holding her hands at her chest. Everyone looked at her. She bowed low and smiled to Yuki, "Thank you very much for agreeing to bring me to the ball, Souma-kun. I really appreciate it. Souma-kun and Ayame-san have done so much for me…"
Yuki smiled kindly, "Of course, Honda-san. Think nothing of it."
"Come now, dear brother. You don't want to be late for the ball, do you? Go! Go! Go!" Ayame said, pushing the couple out the door.
"AH—but what about Ayame-san?" Tohru asked.
"Oh, Tohru. Your concern for me is very touching. It almost makes me want to cry." He dramatized. "But please, don't worry about me. I have one last place to go to before I can rest."
"One more place, oniisan?" Yuki asked, curious now.
But Ayame wagged his finger at Yuki, "Secret!"
Hanajima set down the cheesecake on the table top so that she could share her joy with her loving brother. They ate in silence and peace. Hanajima turned her eyes to her brother whom she knew had been stealing glances at her the whole evening. "What do you wish to ask of me, Megumi-chan?"
Megumi, with his still blank expression, swallowed the piece of cheesecake in his mouth and answered with closed eyes. "You seem more animated then usual, neesan."
She raised a brow. Her? "Animated?"
"Just like now." Megumi said, taking another piece of cake in his mouth. "You're almost conspicuously sad."
"I'm not sad." She said, continuing to eat.
"Aren't you supposed to go to that Halloween Ball? It's supposed to be tonight, right?"
"I'm not going."
"Why not? Is Honda-san not gonna be there?"
"…"
"Or maybe that is why you won't go…"
"…"
Quickly, Megumi started to summon his powers, planning to cast a spell on Tohru for whatever it might have been that she did to his sister. But Hanajima stopped him before he could even begin chanting.
"It's not Tohru-chan's fault."
He resumed to blankly staring at his sister. "Then what—?"
He was silenced when Hanajima gently patted his head and smiled softly at her brother, "Stop worrying about me. You're too young to worry."
Suddenly, a familiar aura made its presence known and her smile quickly vanished.
"What?" Megumi asked.
"Megumi, lock the doors."
"Why? What's wrong?"
"A disaster is coming…"
At the ball, the music was playing loud and everyone was on the dance floor. The salt danced with the pepper and the pirate was having pleasant conversation with the dignified noblewoman. The detectives were laughing at the burglars' jokes and the queen of spades was flirting with the ace of hearts.
Yes, everyone was having a wonderful time. And among the crowd of exuberant youngsters, we see the beautiful angel, prince Yuki, surrounded by beauties and radiant smiles. He is admired by everyone and he graciously smiles his thanks. Everyone loved the prince. Everyone adored him and the prince would always smile and thank them while in his mind think bitterly and wish he was home again, safe inside his towers.
"Yuki-sempai, you really look so much like an angel!" a girl said.
"Sent down from heaven!" Another girl said.
"I wish you were my angel, Yuki-sempai…" A heterosexual said.
But the whole time Yuki simply smiled.
How pitiful it must be, to have to wear a mask, when all along he was… already wearing one. For a moment he had hoped that…for a moment, he had wanted…someone to see through to him. Someone who can save him from being trapped in his own skin…
The prince—all this time—was silently calling out for someone to save him. And for a moment, he thought that someone had heard him. For a moment…
Hana-chan…
He had hoped that the witch had heard him…
But…
"Souma-kun…" He blinked and looked at Tohru who looked up at him with worried eyes. "Are you alright?"
"Ah—hai." He hadn't realized that his mask had slipped. Honda-san had seen his smile turn into a frown. But he quickly smiled again, not wanting to cause worry to the girl. "I'm perfectly fine, Honda-san." Smile. Lie. Perfect.
Suddenly a softer tune played and the first words to the tune rang in his ears just as the doors of the gym opened.
Would you be kinder
If I cried
I know I'm wrong but I
Just don't know why
Everyone gasped and that caught his attention. He looked at Tohru whose eyes were wide just like everyone else's. They were all looking to the door and so—like any human being would—he looked as well.
If to love you
Is to lie
Then would I be lying
Till I die
His eyes widened and his lips parted; his mind, heart and whole body went completely numb.
My soul is aching
For your touch
I want to say I love
So much…
Hanajima walked through the open doors, looking nothing like the Hanajima they all used to know. She was wearing a black Victorian style dress with lacy sleeves flowing down to her wrists. Her flowing gown had gold embroidery all over it, accentuating curves no one but the prince knew she possessed. Her hair was flowing freely behind her, some straying over her shoulder. Around her pale neck was a black lacy choker and behind her hung black feathered wings.
I can not utter
A single word
I wouldn't trade this moment
For the world
She came forward, looking around with blank eyes and somehow his own two feet betrayed their bearer. The moment he realized that he had walked through the crowd to stand in front of her, he was already staring into her deep dark eyes.
But you're too cold and
You don't know why
Would you be kinder
If I cry
She stared back at him with the same unreadable emotion. And without a single word he took her hand in his and led her to the center of the floor.
I found your truth tonight
I don't know why
If to love you
Is to lie
Slowly, hesitantly but as if in a trance, the angel rested his gentle hand on the devil's hip and pulled her close to him. The devil, hesitant but as if in a trance, rested her trembling hand numbly on his shoulder and held him just as close.
I'll take your hand tonight
And whisper kindness
Maybe in the end
You'll see my loneliness
Slowly they danced, in their own little world…their eyes never strayed from each other's and it seemed that the whole world around them had ceased to exist. It was only the two of them now, these two entities and the music.
And maybe at the end
Of this last dance
I'll find out why
If to love you
"Why are you here?" the angel softly whispered, his heart feeling so strange and a fluttering in his stomach he'd never felt before.
Is to lie
"Your brother attacked my house."
Sweatdrop.
Lalalalala…
Lalalala…
Lalalalala…
Lalalala…
"Oh." He smiled sheepishly. "Gomen."
She smirked kindly but said nothing.
I found your truth tonight
It made me smile
You're even more beautiful
Than a lie
"I'm glad you came tonight, Hana-chan…" he smiled, sincerely this time.
Her smile faltered for a moment, her mind became blank at the sight of his sincerity. Until she mustered up the courage to smile and say, "You're beautiful tonight, Prince Tenshi."
And this time, the prince blushed a deep shade of red, his smile wider than any other smile he'd flashed the whole night. He laughed sincerely and softly while Hana smiled, watching him brighten the whole room effortlessly.
Would you be kinder
If I cried
I know I'm wrong but I
Just don't know why
"Thank you, Hana-chan…But I don't think a guy should be called 'beautiful'."
"How embarrassing it must be for beautiful women to be surpassed by a man."
I want to say I love
"You're quite bewitching tonight too, you know."
The real and beautiful
"Hmph…your brother is a forceful character."
"He's an embarrassment…"
You…
"But it's alright…He only thinks of Yuki-kun's happiness after all."
"So…you like my brother?"
"No."
Sweatdrop. "Hehe…"
"Yuki-kun…"
"Hai?"
"The song is over."
"Oh—Uh—yeah…"with that, their feet stopped and they stood still, remaining in each other's arms. His smile still lingered and she couldn't help but stare. Slowly, he bent down to whisper to her ear, "I love you…"
He could hear her gasp softly.