The Big Dating Question
Disclaimer: I do not own Shrek.
A/N: long time no chapter… I'm gonna try to be more regular about updating, but who knows. Massive thanks to anyone who still cares
Chapter Fourteen: And the walls come crashing down…
Charming angrily drew a stick-figure picture of his mother with a crayon on a giant piece of construction paper. "I hate you!" He screamed, picking up a black crayon and furiously drew on the creation. "You're so mean to me! I'm gonna run away for ever and ever and never come back!!!"
--
Walter sighed. Why, oh why had he listened to that woman with the infuriating accent? He didn't care about the stupid petulant child… he certainly didn't like the boy's mother. And now he despised his replacement.
All of this anger had arisen because right now he was standing outside that puerile brat's door!!!
Why oh why was he a sucker for women?!
--
Puss crawled into the dead man's shirt, holding his breath because of the smell. When they took the body away, he would be a free fur ball.
--
Li'l Red sighed. It was the most feminine of sighs. Sigh sigh sigh. She was bored. Puss was in jail (how she love a man in uniform!) and Charming was, well, rather un-Charming. Tomorrow, she was going to sign up for cleared his throat. "Ahem. Charming, sir, would you please open this door?"
"WHY?!" Charming screamed through the door
"Because."
"BECAUSE WHY?!"
"Because I said so, that's why!"
"I HATE YOU!"
"Well, the feeling is quite mutual."
"GO AWAY! YOU AREN'T MY FATHER! I DON'T HAVE TO LISTEN TO YOU!"
"Quite right."
"WHY ARE YOU STILL THERE?!"
"Because I am getting paid generously to deal with you and your moods."
"YOU ONLY LOVE ME FOR MY MONEY!"
"Well, seeing as it is not your money, I do not love you only for your money. As a matter of fact, to be quite honest, I do not even love you."
"I HATE YOU!"
"As you've stated."
"GO AWAY!"
Walter sighed. It was going to be a long day.
--
"Hmm… will Charming ever come out? Did Puss escape? Who is Charming's father? I don't know, and I know Walter doesn't care! Mirror out!"