Title: Late Night Musings
Disclaimer: No infringement intended, The Office doesn't belong to me, otherwise- naw, I won't even go into it.
Summary: Roy's drunk during a confrontation between Jim, Pam and The Office. HOW AWESOME AM I?
Spoilers: Phyllis' Wedding.
A.N.: So not my fault it took me this long to put this up. I had already written it, and it was waiting on my computer. But then the third quarter of school was a week away from enfing, and I found out I had a D in Chem. So I spent all my extra time getting the grade up to a B+. Which I accomplished, by the way.
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A warm body engulfed her, and as Pam tried to make sense of why Kelly smelled like Roy's cologne and her voice was coming to the far left, she noticed that it was 9:07am. Not bad, she thought as she leaned away from Kelley, not really in the mood for this sort of thing after such a horrific morning, and then promptly realized it wasn't Kelley hugging her.
"Roy? What are you doing?" Her voice was muffled in his beard, but that didn't stop her from saying it.
"I was so worried about you. You didn't return my calls, and you're late for work." If anything, the way Pam was leaning pack, trying to get out of the hug would be comical, and Michael would surely have made some joke (Wow, Roy, looks like your lady love-ah isn't that much interested in love at the moment), only nothing seemed that quite funny at that moment.
"Roy, let go." Not the most graceful thing to say, but Pam wasn't exactly in the greatest mood. He moved back, and that's when Pam noticed his bloodshot eyes, and how his cologne was tinged with the stench of hard liquor. The undeniable guilt that she might have affected his sobriety was the only thing that kept her from running to her desk.
Instead, she walked.
She placed her purse on the counter, right where she always did, and pulled down her shirt, hoping to rid it of the creases Roy's hug had caused, intent on not looking up at Jim's burning gaze. She really hoped everyone was working, for once, and wasn't paying the least bit of attention.
"PAM." Tone too loud for a person who knew better. What was going on? Didn't he read her note?
"Roy. I think you need some coffee. So do I. I haven't a cup all morning, and I think it'll do a world of good. I know it will for me." Speaking in a way she wasn't accustomed to, Pam didn't look up, wouldn't. Who knew what lay in his eyes?
"Pammy, why'd ya leave me that note last night?" The opposite of what she expected him to say. Well, today was a contrary day. She really wished it wasn't though. Looking up, she spoke,
"Roy, let's go get a cup of coffee and I'll explai-"
"No!" He cut her off loudly, she flinched. "Tell me, Pam. Why'd ya leave after we slept together? Was I some pitty fuck?"
"We didn't... we didn't, I asked, we stopped Roy." Shock and embarrassment kept her from completing a sentence, and as her face turned bright pink, she wanted to tell Roy to shut it, because couldn't he see that Jim was right there?
"Oh yeah?" He turned to the office, and as her gaze followed his, she saw that everyone was staring, even Dwight wasn't touching his phone. Her hand went up to her necklace, needing some resemblance of calm, of normal, this wasn't normal. "She was wearing a blue bra and green panties. Did you know she does this thing when you kiss her stomach? Sort of tilts her back and-"
"Roy!" Out of her mouth before she can help herself, her necklace twisting recklessly, how could he do this? But suddenly his out-of-focus eyes were back on hers, and when he spoke, all malice is gone from his voice
"Why'd you leave Pam?" His voice sounded so broken.
"I told you, in the note..." So badly, she wanted to just hide, stop talking, not be here. Couldn't she see that this morning she wasn't supposed to come in? Roy's hand comes down on the counter, palm flat, and the jelly beans bounce. Especially the green ones.
"The note? The note." And she saw his hand go into his pocket, come out with a white sheet, rumpled. He cleared his throat as he unfolded it, and Pam suddenly wanted to grab it out of his hands. She almost did, except one arm was around her midsection, and the other was wrapped around, tangled, in her necklace. "Dear, Roy- why didn't you just say John?" Roy is nothing if not witty when drunk, "I'm sorry- you're sorry! That's rich- But I can't go back down this path. Not again. I wasn't happy. I don't think you were either, but we're familiar, and people don't like to change. It isn't anything you could have done or didn't do, we just weren't meant to be. I want, I want more I guess. Somehow I fell out of love with you, and I think if you thought about it, you don't love me anymore, either. I hope you find someone who really loves you for who you are. -Pam."She briefly wipes at her eyes, and hopes to g-d no one's noticed. Her luck really wasn't with her this morning. "No Pam, you don't get to cry. You dumped me, remember? Twice. Don't you dare cry."
"Roy-"
"And no excuses either!" He shoves the crumpled letter in her face, making her take a step closer to Jim, without thinking about it. "Why'd you dump me twice? You were happy. I know you were happy! Ten years together, and then suddenly... Suddenly you wanted to do art internships, talked about going to museums, wanted to build a terrace, buy plants.. you wanted to see the new the new Power Rangers movie so you could talk to Jim about it-" Recognition covered his glazed eyes, "It was Jim, wasn't it?" Her silence proved more than words ever could. He did a half turn, before his eyes landed on Jim, "Fucking best friend. I just wanted you to talk to her, not go behind my back and fu-" Shut it, shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it
"Roy, leave him out of this."
"Why? You love him? Is that why you don't love me anymore? You fell for him- the charmer- and forgot about me?" His bloodshot eyes looked so scary with that amount of adrenaline injected. Shut it, shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it
"I didn't, Roy I,"
"Can't even say it, can you?" Shut it, shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it shut it
I didn't mean to." Her voice was soft, but everyone heard it perfectly, especially Jim. She hears his breath hitch. Aren't confessions supposed to make you feel better? Instead Pam just felt more weighed down. She didn't want it to come out like this, in front of everyone. Especially Karen. Especially Roy. "I thought it was going to be a fleeting crush, so I didn't pay any attention to it. And then I realized I loved him, it wasn't until.."
"You broke our engagement." Her nod lets the tears shake themselves loose of her eyes.
"I didn't mean to hurt you. You have to believe that. I just couldn't marry someone who I didn't love, when, when I-"
"Could have been with Jim instead." The voice was so cold and impersonal. Pam knew she's supposed to deny that. She's supposed to say she didn't want to tie him down with a wife who couldn't love him, couldn't do that to him, and she couldn't, but to deny Roy's words would be a lie. And Pam was so tired, so tired all of a sudden, of all the lies and half truths, so she just nodded.
The fist was so unexpected Pam didn't even react when she saw it coming. Jim, however, must have had faster reflexes than her, or saw it coming, because he caught it in his hand. He was leaning over the counter, and Pam thought reflectively that the position must be awkward, but Jim certainly wasn't acting like it.
"I think you should go home Roy." His voice was calm but sure, and Pam had a feeling if he'd said the same thing to her, she would have done it easily. Well, if she had her car.
"Pam and I aren't done talking." Roy pulled his arm away from Jim's grip.
"Yes you are." Seeing the looks around the room, Roy backed away from the counter.
"Pam, I didn't mean, I'm drunk." I can see that.
"Go home Roy." He's trying to catch her eyes, but she can't bear to look up, she doesn't want to him, his excuses. Finally, his footsteps echo as he walked across the office, and he slams the door. Roy is all about theatric's when he was drunk. Pam spotted her chair, and sat down in it, hard. It wasn't until she heard Kelley's voice (Oh my g-d Pam, are you ok?) that she allowed herself to cry.
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1. You want to see JimComfort!Pam, right?
2. And Karen's reaction to all this?
3. Michael's lame!comfort jokes?
4. Then please review!