Scene VII - Casa Bartowski

Chuck and Sarah slept in his bed, facing away from each other in the darkness.

As time passed, the pair shifted in their sleep. Sarah sprawled over her side of the bed. Having forgotten her sleep mask, her arm rested over her eyes. Chuck was on his side facing Sarah, one arm curled under his pillow and the other reaching towards her side of the bed.

By the time the darkness started fading, both sleepers had shifted again. Sarah faced Chuck, curled up in a loose fetal position. Chuck lay on his back, his arms splayed to his sides uncertainly.

As morning approached, each lay on their sides, facing each other but on opposite ends of the bed.

The faint sound of the front door closing intruded upon the room. Both stirred.

Sarah became alert in short order, a guarded expression on her face. She assessed the unfamiliar surroundings without moving and quickly picked up her bearings, relaxing almost immediately.

Chuck goofily stretched before noticing Sarah. Suddenly, he recognized her, and a smile lit up his face. He greeted her in a quiet voice. "Hey."

Sarah returned the smile with one just as genuine. "Hey," she responded in a drowsy and slightly shy voice.

Chuck just lay there, staring at Sarah. Her eyes were happy and sleepy. Her hair was slightly frizzy. The rest of the room was blurry to his eyes. Sarah was all that there was.

Sarah seemed to have a problem swallowing. Chuck cursed himself for not putting a glass of water on her bedside table. She recovered, never taking her eyes off of his.

Suddenly the door burst open, and in stormed Morgan, who leapt onto the middle of the bed, wearing his new pajamas. It was a light blue onesie, complete with feet. He looked like a ten-year old kid with a beard. As Morgan bounced up and down on Chuck's mattress, Sarah and Chuck just stared in disbelief, unsure what to say.

Morgan stopped jumping, and put his arms out, calling out, "C'mon guys, Santa came! Let's get the lead out!"

Sarah looked at Chuck, unable to find the words and clearly looking for help. Chuck managed to form a coherent sentence. "Wow, Morgan. Ellie outdid herself this year."

Morgan shook the bed as he dropped to a sitting position between their outstretched legs, facing Chuck a little more than Sarah."Man, when Ellie pulled out the boxes at the end of the evening, I thought I was toast. You know how Ellie always gives me the terrible PJs, and I always put up with it because, well…"

Chuck finished his sentence, "… you are utterly infatuated with her and it was the only way she would allow you in the house on Christmas?"

"Yeah, that. Well, I got home, and opened the box, and I fr-reaked. There I am with Anna, and I have a frickin' onesie to wear. But, dude, Anna was totally into it!" He fell over onto his back. "I hope you guys had half as much fun as we did last night."

Morgan's last comment caused two very different emotions in Chuck. However, they both triggered the same reaction: a slightly nauseous stomach.

Scene VIII – Casa Bartowski, Living Room

Ellie and Devon were hard at work in the kitchen. Ellie sported the identical pajamas to Sarah, except hers were a dark shade of green. Devon was wearing shiny red pajama pants, but seemed to have forgotten to slip on his shirt after he got up. The two were happily bustling about the kitchen.

Anna and Morgan were kneeling over by the tree. Morgan wasn't the only one whose pajamas were kid-themed: Anna's pajamas made her look like a middle-school girl, and her decision to put her hair up in pig tails and pop the occasional bubble with her gum only added to that perception.

Morgan wasn't kidding when he said Santa had come: the stockings were stuffed and there wasn't enough room under the tree for all the gifts. Morgan was excitedly talking to Anna about the presents under the tree, occasionally picking up a package, shaking it, and telling her what he hoped it was.

Sarah and Chuck were back on the couch, relaxing. Ellie had quickly shooed them out of the kitchen when they had offered to help, so Sarah took the opportunity to ask about Morgan's onesie.

Chuck explained that Christmas Day was always divided into two parts in the Bartowski house: the morning was about family, while the afternoon was about friends. Morgan, to Ellie's dismay, had become part of the "family" the year after Chuck got kicked out of Stanford. With Chuck going through such a rough time, he and Morgan had become inseparable again. Despite Ellie's dislike for Morgan, she put it aside on Christmas for Chuck.

However, the first Christmas Morgan made some suggestive comments to Ellie about the pajamas she got for him. Apparently Morgan took the pajamas to be a sign she was interested in him, despite everything in her manner, her words, and pretty much all her interactions with Morgan. From that Christmas on, she tried to show him that she didn't think of him romantically by buying pajamas that were as far away from sexy as she could.

After the scene at Thanksgiving, Ellie was unsure whether Anna would be around for Christmas, and she always shopped on Black Friday. So, she kept up her tradition of getting Morgan what amounted to kid's pajamas. This year, she found him a onesie.

After Ellie found out Anna was coming, rather than return the onesie, she simply went and got Anna pajamas from a similar set. Ellie hoped it might help to get on Anna's good side to show she thought of the two of them as a couple. Apparently, it worked wonders (along with whatever Ellie whispered to Anna last night), because Anna looked completely at ease in the apartment for the first time.

Something about the way Sarah was looking at him while he talked unnerved him. It unnerved him in a good way, but he still had to struggle to concentrate. Chuck found himself unable to tear his eyes from hers as he finished the story. He decided to excuse himself and slipped back to his bathroom; he clearly needed to regroup.

Scene IX – Casa Bartowski, Bathroom

After splashing water on his face, Chuck looked at himself in the mirror, droplets still trickling down his cheeks. He had trouble banishing Sarah's gaze from his mind, and when he did manage to put it aside, he could only think about how Sarah had smiled at him as she woke up.

He splashed a little more cold water on his face, trying to bring himself back to reality. "Look," he told himself, "you know that Sarah felt it was critical that we shore up our cover. She doesn't feel that way about you. She made that clear."

Chuck continued lecturing himself in a quiet voice, "You still have strong feelings for her. You'll get over her; you just need some time. Until then, keep yourself in a solid, rational frame of mind." Chuck felt a little better after his little talk with himself. He wiped his face dry.

So what did that mean? He'd seen how well Sarah played the part of the smitten woman with Kirk; she was just playing her part again today. That made perfect sense.

The problem was that he needed to play his part, too. Sarah couldn't shore up their cover without his help. And he couldn't lie to his sister.

Ellie. Chuck developed a sinking sensation in his stomach. Ellie so badly wanted him and Sarah to be going strong, and she would notice anything that didn't ring true. Sarah had the ability play her part to a tee, but Ellie would be watching Chuck as well. And the reality was that Ellie would be safer if she didn't see any holes in the cover.

He had to hurt somebody today. The choice was easy.

Chuck made himself a deal. He was going to accept everything that happened that day at face value. He was going to let himself believe, as best he could, that everything Sarah was showing him was the truth, and react truthfully to it. He wouldn't be lying to his sister, because everything he did would come from the heart.

It would hurt like hell at the end of the day, but it was his only move. His eyes looked vaguely haunted as he stared at himself in the mirror.

Scene X – Casa Bartowski, Living Room

Once Chuck managed to shake off the gloomy realizations from the bathroom, he came back out to take his seat next to Sarah on the couch, and soon they were relaxed and laughing. The rest of the day was a series of wonderful memories.

Late in the morning, Chuck called Morgan over, and the two re-arranged the seating area to face the Christmas tree in the front window. Ellie brought over a tray full of baked goods and set it on the coffee table, while Devon ferried coffee and orange juice over for everyone. The six of them made themselves comfortable.

After an hour of conversation over the light breakfast, Devon played Santa, handing out Christmas gifts. Ellie and Sarah sat on the couch next to each other, looking like sisters in their pajamas and their interactions. Morgan spoke in wild gestures to Chuck and Anna about the Xbox game he just opened, with the two others able to get the occasional word in edgewise. Chuck did little talking, preferring to enjoy the scene with a contented smile.

Sarah played with the heart-shaped gold necklace that Chuck "gave" her (to Ellie's obvious relief) as it hung around her neck while she anxiously watched Chuck open her gift to him: an understated silver watch with a black leather band. Chuck gave her a big smile in return, and leaned over to give her a kiss on the cheek as well. He slipped the watch onto his wrist to try it on. Ellie watched their interactions with delight.

The gift exchange complete, the six changed out of their pajamas into real clothes, taking some time to get themselves and the apartment cleaned up along the way. The extended dining room table was put in place; Sarah and Anna set the table while Chuck helped Ellie in the kitchen while Devon poured drinks.

Morgan was nowhere to be seen, having slipped back to Chuck's room to try out one of his presents. He had a chagrined look on his face when Chuck chased him back into the living room.

Christmas dinner was an extensive affair. As people arrived, they exchanged Holiday greetings and were quickly given glasses of wine, mixed drinks or water, as they preferred. The room was full of laughter and conversation, with a series of Christmas carols playing from Chuck's iPod. Chuck held Sarah's chair for her, helping to scoot her in before heading to the kitchen to refresh her glass of wine. Sarah had a happy but slightly wistful expression on her face as she watched Chuck all the way across the room.

In the late afternoon, the windows grew dark, and people start to filter out of the apartment by one's and two's. Soon it was down to the original six. Chuck and Sarah took their places on the couch together while Anna and Morgan had an animated debate about whether they would have allowed Gollum to go with them on their quest to Mount Doom. Chuck delivered a quip about the idea of Morgan surviving on that little food that made Sarah and Anna laugh; Morgan was not as impressed.

Seemingly without even thinking about it, Chuck reached over to take Sarah's hand. She looked surprised for just an instant, but her expression quickly became pleased. Their fingers opened and closed as they re-adjusted their grip to better fit, their eyes never leaving the others and their smiles seemingly etched permanently onto their faces.

At the end of the night, it was down to just Ellie, Devon, Sarah and Chuck. Chuck's left arm looped around Sarah's waist in their spot on the couch, her head comfortably nestled in the indentation between Chuck's shoulder and neck. Sarah turned over Chuck's wrist to check the time. "Oh, my goodness. I'd better be going."

Ellie protested, "No! You can't leave, not yet."

Awesome offered, "One more glass of wine."

Sarah smiled at their comments. "Sorry, sorry, I've got to be getting home. I'm opening tomorrow, and I've got errands to run before work."

Ellie looked both understanding and frustrated. "I hate in when the real world sets back in, don't you?"

Sarah looked back at her with the slightest hint of an ironic smile. "Even more than you, I'd bet."

She walked over and gave Devon a hug. He wrapped his arms around her and said, "Sarah, it was absolutely awesome having you here."

She laughed as she released him. "I see you haven't dug into that thesaurus Chuck gave you for Christmas yet."

Devon smiled confidently. "Hey, you gotta dance with the one who brung ya. Am I right?"

Sarah touched his shoulder affectionately, and slid over to give Ellie a hug.

Ellie returned the hug with a huge smile, and whispered, "I am so glad you stayed with us." She let Sarah go, and continued, "It meant so much to me, and to Chuck, too."

Sarah looked her straight in the eye, and responded, "It meant a ton to me, too."

"We'll see you at New Year's, then?" Ellie asked.

"Wouldn't miss it. I've been meaning to ask: how the heck are you guys giving three parties in a week?"

Devon grinned, explaining, "We're gluttons for punishment. Besides, when I mix up my famous marg-a-rit-as, we don't have to worry about finding a cab home."

Chuck interjected, "Yeah, we just have to worry about everyone else getting one."

Sarah smiled. She turned to face Chuck, "Help me grab my stuff?"

His smile had just a hint of sadness. "Of course." The two headed back to Chuck's room, Sarah leading the way down the hall. Sarah opened the door, and the two walked in.

He shut the door behind them. It was an action he'd done hundreds of time before, but this time the sound of the latch clicking seemed to echo through the room. The day was over.

Sarah retrieved her bag from the corner. Chuck took a deep breath to steel himself. Back here, he reminded himself, the cover wasn't important. Behind closed doors, Sarah was just a friend, no matter how wonderful the day had been.

Chuck asked, "So, how'd we do today?"

Sarah moved her bag over to the bed; she looked up with a slightly puzzled smile, and asked, "What do you mean?"

He was puzzled as well. "Um…" Sarah always defaulted to talking about the mission at hand; Chuck was a little surprised that he had to qualify his comment. "Our cover: did we shore things up like you wanted?"

The smile on her face faded, leaving a strangely blank expression in its place. She spoke a bit more slowly than usual when she replied, "Yes. I think everyone believed what happened today was real."

His expression was a mixture of relief and confusion. Normally Sarah would have at least offered a smile for a mission well-done. "That's a good thing, isn't it?"

Looking down, Sarah didn't respond for a second. She seemed to gather herself, but just as she was about say something, she stopped. Her eyes darted to the left, then back to Chuck. "Walk me to my car?" she asked, a plaintive tone creeping into her voice. She handed her presents to him and picked up her bag. Opening the door, she walked out of the room without another word.

Chuck lingered for a second. This couldn't be happening. He had been working so hard to get over Sarah, to remind himself that nothing was going to happen. Knowing all that, Chuck willingly allowed his feelings for Sarah back to the surface. "Follow my lead," she had told him about re-establishing their cover. And as much as he knew it was going to eventually hurt, he did that. For Ellie. For Sarah.

Why could he get nothing right with Sarah? Chuck started to get angry.

He took a deep breath to steady himself. He was not about to throw away that day's sacrifice over a moment's anger; he could keep his emotions in check until he got outside, and then he and Sarah could talk further. There had to be some explanation.

Carrying her presents back into the living room, he caught Sarah saying one more goodbye to Ellie and Devon. "There you are," she said with a smile. She turned back to pair. "Thanks again for a wonderful time. Good night!"

Ellie and Devon echoed her "good night". Chuck and Sarah headed outside, Chuck pulling the door shut behind him while balancing the presents on a knee. He was impatient for Sarah to say something, but she kept walking towards the fountain without looking back at him.

The door to Casey's apartment opened up, and out came Casey, looking a bit bleary-eyed and very irritated. He wore his pajama bottoms and a blue T-shirt which read, "I never saw an American flag burned at a gun show."

His gaze shifted between the two as he said, "Man, I thought you guys would never leave. Enjoy your partying?"

Chuck set Sarah's packages on the wide ledge of the fountain and offered, "You were invited today, you know. You could have stopped over."

His stance confrontational, Casey turned to face Chuck. "While I appreciate that, an invitation doesn't do me much good when I have to slog through all the reconnaissance tapes on my own so you two can protect your cover."

Sarah got that same odd blank expression on her face again. She asked, a little woodenly, "Anything interesting?"

Casey glared over at her. "No. Everything I heard and saw was the exact opposite of interesting." He turned back to Chuck. "I used to use your conversations with Morgan as the clear measuring stick for boring. But your old buddy Liniman is now number two with a bullet."

Chuck had already been emotional when he left the apartment, and Casey was really starting to push his buttons. "Well, Agent Casey, I see you've found the grumpiness of ten Casey's plus two this Christmas. But if there's nothing to report, why don't I walk Sarah to her car. You can head back inside, trade your bumper sticker in for another outfit, and then we'll head back home for a desperately needed glass of eggnog to calm you down." Chuck punctuated the last three words with a raised tone through a clenched jaw.

"No, thanks. I've got five more hours of tape to cover. Besides, somebody has to be protecting the country while you two are off having your fun."

Chuck fought to keep his temper, but was quickly losing the fight. He had spent the day deliberately setting himself up to be hurt again, in part to help out Sarah and even Casey. To have Casey demean those efforts were the last straw. "Today wasn't exactly a picnic for me, either."

A shout erupted from Sarah's lips. "Enough!"

Both men turned to look at her, each still looking angry. Their anger was nothing compared to Sarah's: she was clearly at the end of her rope. She barked out,"I'm done with both of you. Casey, anything to report?"

Casey's expression telegraphed that he was about to make a smart-ass remark; she quickly cut him off in a fierce tone, "Agent Casey, anything to report. Yes. Or. No."

He didn't look intimidated as much as chastised. "No, nothing."

"Fine." She turned to face Chuck. "Chuck, good work today. All we have to do is nail down New Year's, and our cover will be back in good shape."

She shifted her bag on her shoulder. "Now, if you will excuse me, I'm heading home to shower off," she said somewhat viciously while staring at Chuck. Almost as an afterthought, she directed her glare at Casey for a short moment before she turned around, striding determinedly towards the street.

Despite his anger, her tone still stung Chuck to the core. He turned towards Casey and noticed a slightly amused expression on his face as his gaze followed Sarah out of the courtyard. This did nothing to calm Chuck. "What could possibly be funny?"

Casey turned to Chuck, and took on a lecturing tone in a much quieter voice. "Holidays are hell on agents. They have to almost completely swear off family and friends, and most of the year it's not a problem. But, man, Christmas comes along and takes down the best of them. You and Ellie must have really gotten under her skin with your festivities; I've never seen her this emotional."

A thought occurred to Chuck. In a sarcastic tone, he responded, "Right, because your little tantrum back there wasn't about anything to do with Christmas. And you avoiding the festivities today wasn't about protecting yourself from becoming emotional."

Casey glared at Chuck and tried to find a clever retort. Several emotions crossed his face in quick succession. He finally gave a grunt that Chuck had never heard, one of frustration and defeat, and retreated to his apartment. The door closed with a slam behind him.

Chuck was left alone in the courtyard. He didn't deserve any of this. He suddenly felt very tired and went to sit on the fountain ledge. As he was about to sit, he noticed Sarah's presents still sitting on the fountain ledge. Angry or not, he wasn't going to let Sarah go home without her Christmas presents. He grabbed the packages and took off running after Sarah.

As he ran, he thought about what Casey had said about agents and the holidays. That, in combination with opening his heart for the day, made it feel somehow right to make sure the day ended on an up note for Sarah, even if she didn't return his feelings. His jaw tightened with determination, and he shed his anger as he ran.

With the holiday, all the close spots had been taken, so Sarah had parked further down the street than usual. This gave Chuck the time he needed to catch up to her, running up just after she climbed in the car. He knocked on the passenger-side window, startling Sarah.

Typical for Sarah, she recovered in a hurry. She turned towards the driver-side door panel to put down the window, quickly wiping away something in her eye before she turned back.

Chuck crouched down next to the car, both to catch his breath and so he could see Sarah. "Hey," Chuck said with an open expression. "You forgot these." Sarah managed a smile of thanks. She still obviously wasn't herself, so Chuck kept talking.

"It wouldn't be Christmas without your … " he looked down into her stack of presents, and saw Ellie's gift to Sarah " … plush robe with matching slippers, or your … " he stared a little disbelievingly at what he saw, " … Monty Python DVD? How'd I miss that?"

Sarah smiled at the memory. "You were in the kitchen with Ellie. Morgan told me that if I was going to hang around the two of you, I was going to have to be educated on the 'classics'."

Chuck smiled a little bigger. "Right. The classics, like 'Casablanca', 'Citizen Kane' and 'The Search for the Holy Grail'."

Sarah looked grateful to be laughing. With a quizzical look, she inquired, "By the way, what exactly are the 'Knights Who Say 'Ni'?"

Chuck gave a facetious nod as he explained, "Oh, it's very deep and symbolic stuff. I couldn't possibly explain it without diagrams and charts." He broke into a huge grin towards the end.

Sarah laughed some more, although there was still a melancholy undertone. "Well, thanks, Chuck." She even managed a grateful smile.

Chuck responded glibly as he reached in to set the packages on the passenger seat, "Hey, that's what boyfriends are for." Chuck kicked himself a bit; he was still stuck in the earlier mindset where everything between the two of them was real, and had forgotten the "fake" in front of boyfriend.

As he knelt back down, he noticed her surprised reaction; she had caught the omission. He changed the subject, knowing his slip would make her uncomfortable. "Listen, I wanted to thank you for everything today. I know holidays have to be tough times for you guys."

"Hey, it wasn't exactly torture spending Christmas with you and Ellie. Honestly, it was the most fun I've had in a long time. I'd gladly spend several more days just like it."

"Well, I just wanted you to know that today meant a lot to me, both because of what it means for Ellie and …" Chuck pulled up, seeing her expression turn a little nervous. He was having real difficulty slipping out of his earlier mindset, and now he had talked himself into the corner.

There was an uncomfortable silence. Chuck wasn't quite sure what to say. Well, that wasn't entirely true: he was sure what he wanted to say, but that wasn't an option.

Sarah prompted him, "And…?" She looked at him intently.

Chuck stared helplessly at her. There was nothing he could say that he hadn't already said to her on previous occasions. He knew how that story would end.

Still, he wanted today to end well for her, especially in light of what Casey said. There might just be a way to do that; he hoped it would work.

Chuck looked away, then looked back at Sarah. "And I'd like to give you one last gift, if you'll let me." Sarah's expression became confused. In a calm voice, he continued, "Close your eyes."

"What?"

"Please, just close your eyes."

"OK...," she said, closing her eyes.

"Now, think back through the day, and pick out your favorite moment."

Sarah asked, a little playfully, "What, just one?"

Chuck couldn't help but grin: he felt the same way. "Yep. Just one. Remember exactly how you felt at that moment."

"OK." A warm smile lit up her face. Chuck recognized the smile: it matched the one she had given him when they woke up that morning. Chuck fought to keep from getting distracted. "Now what?" she asked.

Chuck licked his lips. "I want you to remember how you feel right now, and feel that way the rest of the night."

Sarah's eyes shot open. Chuck said, "I know holidays are tough on agents; I just want you to have one day where all that ... stuff ... goes away. So, can you do that?"

She replied with soft eyes and a softer voice, "I think so."

He smiled at her. "Merry Christmas, Sarah."

With the slightest catch in her voice, she replied, "Merry Christmas, Chuck. "

Chuck stood up and backed away from the car, locking that smile into his memory as Sarah drove off into the night.