Author's Note: Here's another chapter. It's funny, but in this one the discussion keeps taking quirky little turns that keep adding to the number of chapters, but I don't think there will be too many more. All things belong to Fox and Hart Hanson. Please review so I'll know if you're still out there. Thanks.
Angela took a deep breath and tried to decide on the best tack to take with Booth. She had to get this right or Booth and Brennan might never get up enough courage to take their relationship to the next level.
"Listen, Booth," she said, "I don't claim to be the world's greatest expert on relationships. God knows, it took me long enough to find the person I was looking for. And don't worry, I have no intention of telling you anything personal that Bren told me, or vice versa. For one thing, it's a violation of the Best Friends' Code." She smiled tentatively, hoping for a corresponding smile from Booth.
Her little joke didn't seem to have made much of an impression on Booth, if his expression was anything to go by. Angela sensed Booth's uneasiness and couldn't really blame him for it. She hadn't exactly done everything she could to make his life easier since they had known each other. Despite everything he had done for Brennan, the squints still pretty much treated Booth as their favorite target for their humor. She had to admit that, despite the teamwork that had helped to knit them into an efficient professional unit, there was still an aura of "us versus him" in their interpersonal relationships with Booth. Of course, they worked with other law enforcement and FBI personnel, but with Booth it was just more fun because he always got the joke. And he didn't get mad (at least, not often) and he gave as good as he got. It was a lot more enjoyable to joust with someone who always had a smart, sarcastic comeback than with someone who could only give you a blank, uncomprehending stare. In short, Booth was what Jack called a worthy opponent, which a lot of his cohorts were not. But right now she had to convince him that this time she wasn't just trying to get a rise out of him, and was genuinely trying to offer him some serious advice. She therefore tried to look as sincere as she possibly could before she spoke again.
"In all seriousness, Booth, I love Brennan like the sister I never had, and I like you, if not like a brother, at least a whole lot better than I have any of the guys she's dated. I can't stand the thought that you two might mess this up, so I really want to help. Somebody has to. In my opinion, you're making a big mistake if you just leave things the way they are," she said earnestly. "You have to be proactive. I think that you and Brennan have a real chance at a lasting relationship. You're already closer than any two people I know who aren't twins, even though you're coming from totally opposite poles personality-wise. Whoever said 'Opposites attract' must have been talking about you two. And I'm not talking about lust, although there's more than enough of that between you. I'm talking about the other 'L' word. I've been trying to figure out how that's even possible, given that you disagree on most of the big issues like marriage, kids, religion, etc., and I finally came up with a theory. You see, both of you are intensely private people who have been damaged, both by life in general and by affairs of the heart. You've both experienced rejection and loss, and it's left you so gun-shy you either refuse to get serious or you refuse to get involved at all. You'd both rather fall back on an old lover for comfort or a new one you know you don't really care about because it's safer that way. Add to all of that the fact that you're both unapologetically dedicated to your jobs and work tirelessly to be the very best at what you do. So deep down, you understand each other because you have so much in common."
She didn't add what she thought they also had in common, which was that both Booth and Brennan were better looking and hotter than should be legally allowed. Although it was true, Angela didn't think it fit in with the serious tone of the rest of her speech. The longer Angela spoke, the more Booth looked like he wanted to say something. As she paused for breath, he tried to get a word in edgewise.
"Look, Angela, I don't think. . ." As he started to interrupt, Angela held up a hand.
"No, don't interrupt me, or I'll forget what I wanted to say and screw this up. I promise that you'll get your turn when I'm finished, OK? So, what's the upshot of all of that? Basically, you and Brennan have a lot of similar life experiences in common plus the two of you have more sexual chemistry than any four people I know. I think you would have hit the sheets the first week you knew each other except that you refused to go for 'just sex' and she refused to go for anything else. Then you both got involved with other people, so you became friends instead because another thing you have in common is that neither one of you cheats. So it's been a long, rocky road, but you both came through, and at this point the vibes you give off around each other are just, 'WOW.' It's like being in the vicinity of a binary star system—together you throw off enough heat to singe the eyebrows of everyone else in the vicinity. In other words, it makes the rest of us just want to yell 'Get a room!' Only we're too polite."
Angela paused and looked at him. "And please don't tell me you haven't noticed that, because you're a liar if you do. Hell, even Caroline Julian noticed it."
Booth was looking extremely uncomfortable, not to mention skeptical, but he didn't say anything. He was staring at the floor like there might be evidence of a crime there. She gave him a long look, trying to gauge his reaction to her comments. She finally shook her head slightly, and continued.
"Not surprisingly, both of you put a huge value on your friendship. It's pretty much priceless to you. You can't even imagine losing it, and you're scared to death that if you try to take it to the next level you will lose it. So you revolve around each other in this crazy, uneasy dance. You go back and forth between getting closer, generating huge sparks, and then getting scared and backing off to a safer distance. But neither one of you can or even wants to break out of the other's orbit. So you're stuck in a vicious cycle. You want each other so much you can't stand to think about it, because it hurts so much to want what you think you can't have. So you deny that you feel 'that way' about each other and try to maintain the status quo. The only problem is that that's not going to work indefinitely. In fact, it's not working now. Come on, admit it, it's been almost impossible for you to think about anything else but Brennan since Christmas. Brennan opened up Pandora's Box and all the denial in the world isn't going to allow you to go back to not knowing what kissing each other feels like. And as if that wasn't bad enough, now you also have to be obsessed with how great the sex will be."
Angela gave Booth a minute for that to sink in, and watched in fascination while a red flush crept up his neck and into his face. There were some reactions even a seasoned undercover operative couldn't hide. The poor guy really had it bad.
"So the question is, where do you go from here?" Angela searched Booth's face and body language. It was not encouraging. His arms were crossed tightly across his chest, and he was still staring a hole in her office carpet. He clearly wasn't buying her arguments. She sighed and offered her last piece of advice on how Booth should handle the situation.
"Frankly, given that between the two of you, Bren has less social expertise, I think that it's up to you to make the next move. After all, she was the one who agreed to the mistletoe thing. That's a huge positive step for her. She could have just told Caroline 'No way,' but she didn't. I mean, this time last year, she never would have gone along with the whole kiss-under-the-mistletoe idea. So you obviously need to do something to reciprocate so she knows that your response to the kiss is positive."
As Angela looked at him expectantly, Booth did not feel that he could share her optimism that all he needed to do was make a move on Bones and everything would work out. He just couldn't give her the positive answer she obviously expected from him. She thought that Bones was looking for him to make a move, but she didn't have all the facts that he had. He zeroed in on her last comments.
"This time last year she was sleeping with Sully," Booth said flatly, with the air of a man who knew the exact date that that had occurred. "Look, Angela, I know you mean well, especially when it comes to trying to help Bones, but I think you've got it wrong this time. Like I said, she basically acts like it meant less than nothing to her." He paused, and looked down again.
"She even told Sweets that it was nothing," he said in a low voice. It was obvious to Angela that this fact carried a lot of weight with Booth.
"I can't believe that, Booth," Angela interrupted impatiently. "I'm sure that wasn't what she meant. What did she say to Sweets? What were her exact words?"
Booth looked extremely reluctant, but at her raised eyebrow he finally elaborated, "She told him that it 'meant nothing,' and that it 'had nothing to do with sex.' In fact, she told him it was 'totally sexless,' and gave him the impression that it only happened because of the mistletoe." His tone made it obvious that he had gone over and over Brennan's remarks in his mind, and had them pretty much memorized, but that he found no hope in them at all.
"Oh for God's sake, Booth, don't you recognize DENIAL when you hear it? You should, you've been just as guilty of it as Bren has," Angela exclaimed in exasperation. "You have to look beyond what she says to how she acts."
"Yeah, well, 'how she acts' is 'like it never happened,' and 'like she never wants it to happen again.' And if you're wrong, and I do kiss her, she'll probably tell the FBI I'm sexually harassing her or something and refuse to work with me again, which means my career goes down the toilet along with everything else," Booth almost snarled. It was clear that the discussion was having a bad effect on his temper.
"Give me a break! You know she'd never do that. How many women have you dated?" Angela cried in exasperation.
"Very funny. Well, trust me, none of them were anything like Bones. Most women are pretty easy to profile, but not Bones," Booth responded, reverting to grim resignation.
Angela took a closer look at Booth's expression and took pity on him. The poor guy was obviously suffering. He wasn't even trying to hide his pain and frustration any more.
"Look, sweetie, you've got to trust me because this time, it's different. Whatever she says, subconsciously Bren wants you to make a move, but she doesn't know how to signal it because of the 'we're just partners' crap getting in the way. So outwardly she pretends everything is normal, while inwardly she daydreams about kissing you again. You have to do something, or your window of opportunity will close and you might not get another chance any time soon, if ever!"
Booth sighed, lost in thought, wishing he could believe her. "I'll think about it," he promised at last.
"Come on, Booth! Go for it! Remember, 'The valiant die but once'," Angela said encouragingly.
"I said 'I'll think about it' and I will," Booth snapped. "It's not something I can just rush into. If I do it, I have to plan for exactly the right opportunity, and allow for contingencies, and even then the logistics might not work out. Then I have to have a fall back plan."
"Oh lord," Angela thought, "He's talking about it like a military campaign. That's never a good sign. That kind of thinking comes from the wrong side of the brain. Damn it, why do men always fall back on their training in times of emotional stress? Even the ones who only ever had Cub Scout training do it. It's totally the wrong kind of strategic thinking in situations like this. And hell, now he has me thinking like that too."
Out loud she said calmly, "Listen, sweetie, just remember that Bren isn't thinking about all of this rationally. In fact, she's not really thinking at all. She's operating on instinct, and how she feels. Anything else is just camouflage. So you need to respond based on how you feel, and try not to over-think things, OK?"
Booth nodded, but his mind was clearly not fully concentrating on what she was saying.
"Well! Well! Well!" boomed the voice of Jack Hodgins in a loud, intrusive tone as he walked into the room. "If it isn't the FBI's finest and my favorite forensic artist, together in one room. How are you, my lovely?" he asked, giving Angela a quick kiss.
Without pausing he then threw himself into Angela's other guest chair and commented, "God, what a boring meeting. They really shouldn't allow archaeologists to run the meetings. They are so damned slow to come to the point and make decisions, you'd think they had a couple of millennia to do it in. And to add injury to insult, they serve lousy snacks." He leaned back in his chair and looked around.
"I see that Drs. Brennan and Saroyan aren't back from lunch with the visiting FA from FLA. So what have you two been up to?" He looked quickly back and forth from Booth to Angela, totally ignoring Angela's signals to shut the hell up and go away. He was quick to spot the undercurrents in the room.
"Hey, it looks like you've been having a serious discussion here. Now what the hell could that be all about? You two never have serious discussions unless we have a case, and we don't. Come on Angela, what's going on?"
"Nothing is going on, Jack. Booth was just asking my advice on what to get his cousin who's graduating from college. She's an artist. Even with my help, he still can't decide." Angela Montenegro was nothing if not prepared. She had her excuse ready for just such a visit by a third party.
"Yeah, thanks for your help, Angela," Booth said as he stood up. "I'll let you know what I decide, and how well that turns out. I'll see you later." With that, he headed toward the lab exit.
"Now why does my Spidey sense tell me that what you two were discussing had absolutely nothing to do with art supplies?" Jack asked the room at large.
"You know I love you, Jack, but you have the absolute worst timing in the Northern Hemisphere, and possibly the world," Angela said wryly. All she could do was hope Booth would take her suggestion seriously and act on it. Who knew how long it would be before Brennan reverted to normal and decided that kissing Booth was the last thing in the world she wanted to do because it might mean losing him? Only Temperance Brennan could view that as a rational thought.