Chapter 6

A/N: Thanks to all of you who read and review. It's nice getting feedback.

Thanks again to Kaz for proof reading - you're a star.

"Meredith? Meredith?!"

Someone was shaking her. Rolling over Meredith slapped the arm away.

"Go away" she said sleepily.

"C'mon Meredith, get up. We need to start getting ready. I'm getting married today!" Addison practically squealed the last four words.

That woke Meredith up pretty quickly.

"Addison! I'm so sorry. It feels like I just went to sleep. What time is it?"

"It's 8.30am and we need to start getting ready. C'mon sleepy head out of bed." Addison said as she tugged on Meredith's arm, pulling her from the bed.

Groaning inwardly Meredith decided that it was going to be a very long day. She hadn't slept very well last night. Addi and her had talked about nothing but Derek last night when they came home from the restaurant. Not a good idea before going to bed, all she had dreamt about was the man himself. But what glorious dreams they had been. Still, she didn't feel as though she had slept at all.

Meredith and Addison had decided that it would be best if she ignored the attraction that she felt for Derek. Addison was convinced that it was just the fact that they hadn't seen each other since high school and that Meredith hadn't completely resolved her feelings for Derek. After discussing the subject at length they had decided that it was good old fashioned lust that she was feeling and nothing that would result in a lasting relationship, unlike what she felt for Finn.

Arriving at the church with Addi, Meredith looked over at her friend. Addison looked the absolute picture of contentment. Meredith on the other hand was an absolute bundle of nerves. She tried to tell herself that she was nervous on behalf of Addison, but she only half believed it. She knew without a doubt that it was the thought of seeing Derek again that was making her feel like this.

Walking up the aisle Meredith tried to keep her eyes straight ahead, focused on the minister, but they were drawn to the right, to Derek.

Meredith's breath caught in her throat. He was breathtakingly gorgeous in his tux. It should be a sin for a man to look that good Meredith thought to herself. Thinking of the sinful things that she would like to do to him, Meredith felt herself starting to colour. This is insane, she thought. How on earth am I supposed to get through the rest of the day without thinking about him when there he is in all his glory right in my face? It's as if he's saying "Look at me Meredith, look at what you gave up".

Looking into his eyes, after studying her bouquet while she calmed herself, Meredith was horrified to see Derek smiling at her. The look on his face was as though he had been reading her mind. Surely I'm not that transparent, she thought to herself, he couldn't know what she had been thinking, she hardly believed it herself. Obviously the colour in her cheeks had given away her scandalous thoughts. Mentally shaking herself Meredith continued up the aisle to take her place.

Derek had watched Meredith's every step as she walked up the aisle. He couldn't believe how beautiful she looked in her dress. It was the exact same colour as the dress that she had worn to senior prom. He smiled as he remembered that particular dress and how it had left little to the imagination. This dress was much the same as far as that went, it hugged her in all the right places. Addison had chosen well, he made a mental note to tell her how perfect her choice of dress had been.

Still watching her as she walked toward the alter, Derek marveled at the changing expressions on her face. When she first entered the church she'd had a tentative smile on her face, but as she moved closer toward him he could see that her cheeks were pink as if she had been thinking about something that she shouldn't have. What he wouldn't give to know what was going through her mind at the moment.

Derek had spent a sleepless night tossing and turning thinking about Meredith. About what she had said to him before she had walked away from him at the restaurant.

She was right, he should have assumed that they would be able to behave like adults, but all he could think about was the fact that he wanted to spend some time alone with her, away from prying eyes. It had been nothing but a flimsy excuse to talk to her. He hadn't meant a word of it, except for the part about her reaction to him. She had shot him down in flames, typical Meredith, always prepared to drop him down peg or two . He had wanted to make sure that he wasn't the only one feeling things that should have long ago been dead. Although she had told him that he was imagining things, he knew her better than that. She had protested way too much for him not to have affected her in any way. Hell she was affecting him, had been since he first sensed her presence when she had pulled up out the front of the church.

She's been affecting you longer than that though hasn't she? A little voice inside his head asked. That was true, he had never really gotten over her leaving him. Sure he had dated other women, but none of them compared to Meredith. She was the only one for him, of this he was certain. He just had to figure out a way to make her see that.

Mark had told him last night that Meredith was engaged to be married. That had knocked the wind out of his sails for all of about 5 minutes.

As he had said to Mark, "She may be engaged, but she's not married. I've still got time to convince her that we should be together."

Mark had just shaken his head and laughed wishing him luck. He knew that Meredith's Fiancee was still in England. So he had formulated a plan that he would put into place once they were at the reception venue. He only wished that he hadn't brought Rose with him, that was making things more complicated than he liked.

Standing beside Addison at the alter Meredith watched Derek as he handed Mark the rings, wondering what he was thinking. Meredith herself had been thinking about how she had once pictured herself and Derek exchanging rings and vowing to love, honour and cherish one another in this very church. That was a dream that had been relegated to darkest recesses of her mind. Being here today, standing so close to Derek in such circumstances had brought it all back.

The thing that really hit home was that she was standing at the alter of the church that she had wanted to be married in and was thinking not about her Fiancee but of the man that she had left all those years ago. That thought and the fact that she tingled all over just by being this close to Derek made her realise that she was in fact still in love with him. She realised now, too late to do anything about it that she had made a huge mistake in leaving things the way that she had. Meredith also realised that feeling the way she did about Derek, that she couldn't marry Finn in good faith.

Now that she had finally admitted to herself how deeply she loved Derek. Meredith was strangely comforted, comforted because she had finally allowed herself to admit to the feelings that she had obviously harboured for so long, but at the same time saddened as she realised that they could never be together.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife, you may kiss the bride." The minister announced, bringing Meredith out of her reverie.

Applauding along with everyone else in the church Meredith realised that she had tears in her eyes. They must be tears of happiness for Addi and Mark, she thought to herself.

As they turned to walk back down the aisle behind the newly announced Mr and Mrs Sloane, Meredith and Derek fell into step beside each other. Taking her arm, Derek looked over at Meredith questioningly. Noticing the tears in her eyes, he becomes immediately alarmed.

"Meredith " he whispers "Are you okay?"

Looking up at Derek, Meredith offers a half-hearted smile.

"I'm fine Derek."

"If you're fine then why are you crying?" he asked his voiced laced with concern.

"I'm not really crying. I always get a little teary at weddings. I guess that I have so much invested in this wedding emotionally that I had to release it somehow. I'll be fine in a few minutes. Don't worry," she replied in an upbeat tone.

If only he knew what I was really crying for, she thought to herself. What she really wanted to tell him was that she was crying over missed opportunities. The fact that she had him and then let him go. She wondered if he would see the irony of the situation? She doubted it very much. If she had told him what she was really upset about she was certain that he would have said something along the lines of "That's the way the cookie crumbles Meredith . You had your chance and threw it away."

Gripping her arm more firmly Derek continued to walk back toward the entry to the church.

Noticing a few people that he recognized in the guests assembled he smiled. But his mind wasn't on the other guests, all he could think about was Meri.

Somehow he knew that she hadn't been telling him the whole truth when he had quizzed her about her tears. He wondered why he felt as though she had been holding something back. When they were younger he had always been able to read her pretty easily. As one of the top neurosurgeons in the country he often relied on his instincts to read a situation. From the way that Meredith was behaving just now, he would bet good money that she was holding something back. He made up his mind that he would find out what that something was before the evening was over.

As they stood on the steps of the church posing for photographs with the other members of the bridal party, Derek wondered what would have happened had Meredith not up and left to move half way around the world. Would they still be together and getting married as Addison and Mark had just done? He liked to think so. Of all the women that he had dated since Meredith, she was the only one that he could picture himself growing old with.

Yes, Derek was pretty certain that if Meredith had stayed in Seattle that they would have married and had children. He promised himself, while he looked down at her and smiled that he would do everything in his power to make sure that by the time this wedding celebration was over that he and Meredith were together. Never again to be parted.

First step in this process was extracting a promise from Meredith . Leaning down Derek breathed in the scent of her, lord but she smelt good, biding his time was going to be no mean feat. Moving down to her ear, Derek stilled, he was so close that he would have kissed below her earlobe, as he had so many times before. How he wanted to, but decided that he needed to do this right.

Leaning in closer still he whispered, "Meredith , I want you to promise me one thing tonight."

"What's that Derek?" she replied, willing herself to continue looking straight ahead so that he wouldn't see how affected she was by his nearness.

"I want you to promise that you'll dance with me at least once."

"But of course Derek, I have to dance with you tonight, it's my duty as Maid of Honour to dance with the best man," Meredith replied sweetly.

Derek groaned in frustration. She wasn't making this easy for him. Turning her head so that she could look him in the eye Derek said,

"In that case what I should have said was, that I want you to save me 2 dances Meri . The obligatory one, and another. Do you think that you could handle that?"

Her eyes widened with surprise, he had called her Meri, that implied familiarity and affection. He had always called her that when they dated, it was his pet name for her. She had always loved the way that he said it. No-one else said it quite the same as Derek, that's why she preferred to be known as Meredith.

"Of course Derek. I can, if you can," she replied with a confidence that she didn't feel. This was going to be a long night Meredith thought to herself.

A/N: So that's chapter 6. Hope you enjoyed it. Please review and let me know what you thought.