Disclaimer - See Chapter One.

Chapter Four: Uncle Adam on Edge

While the girls dragged Mickie off to grill her about her and Armistead's relationship, the guys converged on Armistead, being joined by DX, who'd seen Armistead and Mickie kissing and had instantly headed in their direction. Triple H was holding Coco, who appeared agitated and was glancing around.

"What's with her?" Dave asked.

Triple H smirked. "She's just looking for someone special."

"Yeah," Shawn added, "she's trying to find her Uncle Adam, but he doesn't wanna play with her."

Even as they said that, the World Heavyweight Champ strode by, and Coco screamed when she saw him.

"Keep it away from me!" Edge warned, and increased his pace to his car.

The group of superstars laughed as John turned to Armistead.

"So spill, man...what's it like between you two?"

Armistead shook his head. "No, no, no...I'm not gonna sit here and give you the dirty details of my relationship with the Women's Champion."

This statement was met by looks of disappointment from a couple of the guys, as well as an "Aw, why not?" from Triple H.

"Just do what I do," Armistead advised. "Spoil your ladies rotten and be romantic as hell, and you'll all be very happy men."

With that said, he grabbed his and Mickie's trash and headed over to the trash cans. Seeing how they probably weren't going to get any more out of him than that, the group of superstars broke up and prepared to go back to work.

As Vince unhooked the cord that once more let people into the car wash area, Jeff and Armistead stood at their station, waiting for their next customer. To their surprise, Edge's black Bentley pulled up to their station, and the Rated R Superstar got out.

"Full treatment, and don't skimp on the wax, got it?" he ordered smugly, and sauntered off to talk to Vince.

Jeff blinked a few times before turning to Armistead.

"He's kidding, right? He expects us to wash his car and not help us?"

"Evidently," Armistead replied. Before Jeff could refuse, he continued. "Let's just get it over with...the faster we get done, the faster he'll be out of here."

Jeff shrugged, finding it hard to argue with that logic, and grabbed the hose while Armistead grabbed some soap. As they started washing the Bentley, DX - who apparently hadn't washed a car all day - wandered over.

"Nice set of wheels," Triple H observed. "Whose are they?"

"Take a look at the license plate and guess," Jeff muttered, pointing to the personalized plates that read 'RATED R'.

A gleam came over Shawn's and Hunter's faces.

"You know, Shawn," Hunter drawled, "I'm feeling kinda guilty that we've been here all day and haven't washed a single car."

"Yeah, but how can we wash cars when we have to watch Coco?" Shawn replied.

"Well, I don't think her Uncle Adam would mind if we put her in his car while we helped wash it, do you?" Triple H asked Shawn, who shook his head.

"Nah...I think he'd be cool with that."

"Well then, that settles it." Triple H opened the right rear door to the 350,000 car and helped Coco inside.

"Go on and play nice, Coco...we'll get you out in a few minutes, ok?" Having said that, he shut the door and turned to Shawn.

"Problem solved...let's wash a car!"

Shawn grinned and nodded like a little kid as the two of them grabbed sponges and rags.

All too soon, however, it became apparent that Coco was getting bored. At least, she was until she found the horn. The first time she pressed it, Jeff had been kneeling by the left front tire and was washing the rims. The blast from the horn made him jump a mile and he almost wet himself in fright. The sound of the horn was followed by an ecstatic simian shriek from inside the car.

After the horn had sounded several times, people were looking over at the Bentley strangely. Edge, finally realizing it was his car that was making all the noise, headed over to Armistead's station. Triple H, seeing him coming, leaned down and called to Coco from the outside.

"Hide in the back, Coco!"

Apparently, the chimp complied, for the honking stopped. Edge strode over to the car and glared at them.

"You idiots, you set off the alarm!" He shook his head. "Are you finished washing it?"

When Jeff nodded, he opened the driver's door and got in. "Forget the wax...I don't wanna give you four the opportunity to screw that up. I'll just get it done later by a professional."

"Wait, Adam - " Triple H began, but Edge cut him off.

"Save it, Hunter...I don't wanna hear it." He started the engine and headed out, rolling down his window as he did so.

Armistead, Jeff, and DX watched as the car headed for the highway. Triple H simply counted down.

"Three...two...one..."

Coco shrieked from inside the car.

"AAAAHHHH!" Edge screamed, and swerved wildly, losing control of the Bentley, which veered over to the side and smashed into a light pole, crushing the right front fender of the expensive car. Seconds later the light pole crashed down on the car's hood with a groan, seriously damaging the hood and spiderwebbing the windshield.

Coco escaped from the car in between these two events, running around behind the gas station. DX took off after her, leaving Armistead and Jeff to simply stare in astonishment at what had just happened. Edge staggered out of the car, dazed, and ripped open the left rear door and looked around inside frantically as several superstars ran over to see if he was ok, Jeff and Armistead included.

"You all right, Adam?" Armistead asked. Edge fixed him with a black glare.

"Where's that damn monkey?"

"What could the monkey have anything to do with what just happened?" Dave asked. "Hunter and Shawn haven't let her out of their sight once."

"Bullshit!" Edge snarled. "She was in the backseat of my car when I drove off. Obviously, they either deliberately put her in there or else she got away from them, and I'm willing to bet it was the first option!"

As the group stood there, a car pulled alongside and the passenger window rolled down. Ron Simmons was driving. He glanced at the wreckage of Edge's expensive car before summing it up succintly:

"DAMN!"

He then had to drive away quickly, for Edge practically flipped and started after Ron's car. Across the lot, The Undertaker watched from astride his custom Harley Davidson. He'd stopped in to get his bike washed and to sign a few autographs. He'd been chatting with Kane when the accident had occurred, and now watched with his 'brother' as the World Heavyweight Champion chased Ron's car out of the lot before turning back to the group of superstars and Divas that were standing by his car and screaming,

"It was the monkey! I know she was in there!" Edge glanced around frantically, looking for DX, who - wisely - had made themselves scarce. "And when I can prove she was, DX, you're gonna get the bill to fix my car!"

That said, Edge stalked toward the group of folding chairs set up near the cash table, pulling out his cell phone as he did so. The Brothers of Destruction followed him with their eyes before looking at each other and shaking their heads. Apparently, the World Heavyweight Champ had been out in the sun too long.