Yes, I'm back for chapter 3...but this time I actually feel bothered to say the disclaimer

Disclaimer: I/Art is a bang XD do not own Naruto or the Akatsuki or the phrase Art is a bang! The first two are property of Masashi Kishimoto and the last belongs to Taro Okamato.

Warning: Crackish! I try and make it funny, but I'm not exactly sure if it is or not ...oh, and very angry Alatsuki members, very angry indeed...Did I mention cruelty to boats? I know, I should be in jail for that...but I'm not so deal with it XD

Note: Please do not forget Hidan's swear words are still 'sugarlized', meaning the words are replaced with sweet stuff Why? Because I like sweet stuff...P.S. I have also underlined them to reduce confusion

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Kakuzu rubbed his eyes and peered at Deidara's face closer. "Oh no! He's dead! Now we'll have to pay for his funeral!" he yelled to the sky.

"Oops..."

Hidan rolled his eyes at Kakuzu, then shifted them to the blonde member of their organization. He had never really had much to do with Deidara, but they were part of the same group right?

Kisame was poking the deck of the ship as it swayed gently from side to side, the rain falling harder than ever. For some reason, he couldn't make himself look at Deidara's face.

Kakuzu, the only one staring full on at Deidara and still wondering how much his funeral would cost, was the only one who thought something was...well...different.

Suddenly, a cackle of mad laughter broke the once serene silence. The three looked from each other, to the ship, then back to each other. Nope. Nobody they knew of was laughing. Unless...

Have a guess! The laughter was coming from none other than...

Deidara!

The supposedly 'dead' blonde was now sitting up, splitting his sides with the weirdest, loudest, did I mention weird? laugh anyone could have ever laughed. Actually, it was more like a cackle. Unfortunately for him, the other three didn't find the situation quite as funny.

"WHAT THE CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIE! YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD YOU CANDY CANE LOLLIPOP!"

Deidara controlled himself just enough not to laugh for the few seconds while he answered Hidan's outburst. "You...should...have...seen the...look...on...your...faces!" He gasped in between spasms of laughter. "I could have put it on Deviantart un!"

"So...you're not dead?" Kisame asked bewildered, peering at the blonde closely as if missing something. Suddenly, he hated himself for feeling guilty.

Before he could answer, a certain orange masked man ran onto the deck at just about 220 km/h. The 'certain orange masked man' tackled Deidara, sending both of them spinning into the ocean for the second time.

"What the hell Tobi un?" Deidara shrieked, like Gaara when he had his teddy bear torn away (A/N: Not sure if that happened ), just before he plummeted into the ocean.

"Tobi is a good boy! Tobi bet five dollars with Zetsu-san that Sempai was alive!" Tobi yelled joyfully before his head sank under.

"WHAT?" came a yell from the ship deck. Apparently, Kakuzu had overheard that. "Tobi, if you're a good boy, give that 5 dollars to me!" he added, eyes sparkling at the thought of free money. Yes. The free part was very important.

"Yes Kakuzu-san, because Tobi is a good boy," Tobi smiled brightly, still clinging onto his beloved Sempai.

"Help...can't...breathe!" Deidara gasped as the two floated further from the boat.

"We're not falling for it this time you chocolate cookie!" Roared Hidan.

"Damn un..."

As sudden as it came, the ship all the Akatsuki members had been previously standing on came to an abrupt halt. Then, slowly but surely, the ship began to sink...inch by inch into the deep dark sharky depths.

Silence.

"WHAT THE SUGAR CAKES?" Hidan screeched. He had wasted precious moments making sense of what was happening.

Kakuzu had the sense to look around and see what they had hit. Sure enough...

"ICE-BURG!!"

"ICE-BURG UN!!"

Tobi and Deidara had spotted it from their position in the water. "Jump un!" Deidara yelled encouragingly.

"No way!" Kakuzu snapped immediately. "I need to rescue my precious money!" With that, he vanished back into the ship.

Kisame, however, found the invitation to jump into the beloved depth quite promising. "Bombs away!" he yelled, catapulting himself into the water and post likely doing a bellyflop.

At exactly the same time, Itachi, Zetsu, Sasori, Konan and Pein, the members who hadn't come swimming, rushed out on deck.

"What happened?" Itachi asked, apparently not wearing contacts.

"The ship hit an ice-burg and started sinking," said Sasori matter-of-factly, and very bluntly.

"What do we do?" Konan posed the question they were all thinking. It surprised everyone else that they could think of the situation so calmly.

"RUN!" Kakuzu suddenly burst out from the ship, carrying three suitcases of his money. "It's going to sink any moment!"

Without hesitation, the remaining members all jumped, except Konan had jumped onto a paper bird instead.

Kakuzu, Hidan, Pein, Zetsu, Sasori and Itachi hit the water with a SPLAT! Well...Sasori hit the water with a CLUNK, but that's off the point.

"Wish I'd thought of that un," said Deidara wistfully, looking up at Konan.

"There's still time, idiot," Sasori commented, slightly amused, as everyone else watched the ship sink before their eyes.

"Oh yeah un." Acting quickly, Deidara made a clay bird, and in no time, was in the air.

"Damn...wish he took me with him..." Hidan grumbled.

"Moneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoney," Kakuzu looked like a lunatic.

"Hey guys!" Konan yelled from above. "I think I see an island!"

Deidara used his scope to zoom in on the thing Konan was pointing at. "Yeah, it is an island un! But it seems to be deserted..."

"Who cares?" Pein hollered joyfully. "It's land! Let's go!"

And together, they made their way towards the island as the sun shone behind them.

(A/N: coughs loudly That's not exactly what happened...)

Well, for one, Deidara, Konan and Kisame were all trying to race to the island; two flying and one swimming. So far, Deidara was winning. You had to take in account all the rain and that Kisame stopped to chat to fish.

Kakuzu was being dragged down by his money suitcases, and there didn't seem to be any chance of him letting them go.

Pein was hoarding all of his bodies forward, and they worked together to create some sort of human bridge where two bodies would lie flat on the water and the others step over them, then repeat the process.

Tobi was dog-paddling after Deidara, but he didn't seem to be getting anywhere either, since Hidan was kind of using him as a log to float on.

Zetsu was flailing around in the water, looking like he was doing some kind of dance where you made up half the moves on the spot.

Sasori was lying on his back, floating like any puppet should and looking up at the clouds. If someone took a picture of him right now and removed the face, hair and clothing, they could easily mistake him for Shikamaru. But then again, think on Sasori's behalf. He was a puppet, after all, what else could he do?

And Itachi? Itachi had probably been the most sensible out of all. He was using his Chakra to stand on the water, but...was walking in the complete wrong direction that Konan had pointed. He was legally blind.

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That's all for chapter 3 ; I thought it was a good place to end, so I did

I'm not sure I'll be able to update so often after this, but I'll still try XD

Well, please review, or at least show some sign you're read it Please? It's kind of depressing if its possible nobody's reading it ;

Art is a bang XD