Disclaimer: I do not own these characters or this world. I am just having a little harmless fun. The not-so-harmless fun is in my other stories.

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Pineapple

The Slytherin/Ravenclaw game ended predictably. Slytherin had more points and caught the Snitch, but Ravenclaw won on a technicality.

From his seat in the stands Harry couldn't tell what they were arguing about down on the field but he saw Draco blushing slightly and felt a little smug. He had nothing to do with the Slytherin blond's discomfiture but he could enjoy it anyway.

That night Gryffindor Tower had their usual post-game party and this time, at the request of the winners, with a tropical theme. Charms had been cast to turn the wooden ceilings into a deep blue sky, and the sound of the ocean drifted through warm, flower scented air.

Soft white sand covered the floor, and the room was packed with bodies wrapped in floral-print fabric; the more skin on display, the merrier.

Harry shifted in his hammock, enjoying the gentle sway of the net and the light buzz he had humming through his veins. He hadn't seen Malfoy since the game as the Slytherin had declined an invitation to the party, so that was another reason for celebration.

Harry sighed and closed his eyes, listening to the illusionary waves crashing against the conjured shore. He was on the verge of falling asleep when something heavy smacked against his hammock and sent him tumbling to the floor. The hammock was only a few feet in the air, so he wasn't hurt, but his mood had been broken and as he stood he rubbed his elbow, still stinging from impact.

"Sorry, Harry."

Harry opened his eyes to glare at the offending lummox. It was Ginny, leaning heavily on a gently swaying Michael Corner. Both of them were wearing the latest in nearly-naked beach fashion and grinning.

Part of Harry was tempted to hex them, or at least warn them that they were both carrying venereal diseases the other hadn't had yet, but he bit his tongue. There wasn't anything he could do to them that they wouldn't do to each other.

Ginny started giggling, and with the giggles came hiccups. "Hey HahicHarry, guess what? The SlytherhicSlytherins lost be--hic because hicMalfoy is a virhicgin."

The girl collapsed onto the floor in a sodden, giggling mess and Corner landed on top of her with his own case of the hiccups.

Harry's mouth dropped open. He could believe any number of things about the blond boy, but that was not on the list. He crouched down next to the couple, trying to get Ginny's attention, but the girl looked slightly green around the gills and Harry had been to enough of these parties to know that sometimes the giggling hiccups could turn into a projectile spew, so he conjured a bucket and a damp towel, left it within arms reach, and walked away.

Ron and Hermione were curled up on a beach blanket by the fire, toasting marshmallows on long sticks. Both of their mouths were ringed with the sticky white confection.

"Are marshmallows tropical," Harry asked as he settled down next to them.

Ron grinned, and Hermione said, "Not really. But they taste good and I don't think we're really aiming for authenticity right now."

Harry accepted a soft marshmallow from the skewer the bushy haired girl proffered, and popped it in his mouth.

After a few moments of silent chewing, Harry turned to his friends, waited for them to stop kissing and come up for air and told them what Ginny said.

Ron started snickering and Hermione got a thoughtful look on her face before asking the question that had been running through Harry's mind since he heard the rumor.

"How could being a virgin affect how he plays Quidditch?"

Her voice was musing, but steady. Harry heard Ron sniggering even harder at his girlfriend's serious tone.

"Ronald, knock it off," Hermione said softly, and to Harry's surprise the red head did, though his face was still flushed with laughter.

Harry stared into the fire and wondered out loud, "Could it have anything to do with riding a broom?" He ignored Ron's renewed bout of giggles and went on, "I don't think it does because Malfoy has been riding for years and he never had any problems before."

At this Ron snorted and began guffawing so hard he had to lean forward and grip his stomach. Hermione was shoved out of her comfortable spot leaning against her boyfriend and as Ron's laughter tapered off they began squabbling.

Harry wasn't in the mood to referee one of their fights so he got up and left, walking out of the Gryffindor common room entirely and into the cool air of the hallway. The Fat Lady was drowsing in her frame and she mumbled irritably as the door swung open, then quieted back down as it closed. Harry shivered and began to regret not changing his clothes, but it was too late now, so he untied the loose sarong around his hips and wrapped it around his shoulders, leaving his legs with nothing more than a pair of board shorts to protect them.

He could just barely hear the party inside and he knew it would be warmer in there but he felt… itchy, like he had to do something, or find something. His thoughts drifting he walked without intention, wandering down the long stone hallways of the castle until he found himself in the Owlery.

The birds were settled into their nests, hooting and muttering slightly. A dark shape sat in the window and as Harry moved closer he was trying to remember who had such a large owl, until it moved and a thin shaft of moonlight caught the ends of white-blond hair.

As Harry's eyes adjusted to the dim light he gasped at the sight of Draco Malfoy sitting in a pool of moonlight on the windowsill, a small grey owl in his hands.

The blond boy looked up and for a second Harry thought he saw him smile, before the usual sneer twisted his features again.

"You again, Potter? Are you following me?"

Harry shivered from a breeze that came in the open window, and maybe in part from the chill in Malfoy's gaze, cursing whatever impulse led him here.

"I didn't follow you. I was just out, walking."

The other boy released the bird, then stood up. Harry wrapped the cotton sarong even tighter around his body, but Malfoy walked right on by without saying another word.

As he passed Harry smelled something sharp and sour, but with a hidden sweetness, reminding him of the tropical party he left behind. His mouth watered.

Pineapple.

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Note: So there we are. This story is almost complete crack and each chapter is part of a cohesive whole inspired by different fruits. I'm mostly just writing this to entertain myself, but I know a lot of you guys enjoy it, so if anyone is interested the next chapter will be… PEACH. And there may be a little naughtiness, I haven't decided yet.

Please review.