Personal Log: I can't sleep and I know why, but that knowledge does nothing to help my situation. Megan and the counselor brought up some very ugly feelings from deep inside of me and I don't have a clue what to do with them. At least while we were busy at el'Aena, I could take my mind off things. Sisko told me very clearly to come back to DS9 and I would have more than enough to keep me busy. At this point, I wouldn't mind Dukat back or the Borg or something.
Scott clicked off the record button and stood up, stretching out his sore arms and bending his back. So far, he had tried reading, but the book was too interesting. Then, he tried reading boring station reports, but that didn't help. He tried push-ups but all that did was make him sore. He had finally given up and decided to walk the halls of the station and try to wear himself out. Just as he was about to leave the quarters, Megan stopped him.
"Scott?"
Scott turned and looked at her apologetically.
"I'm sorry; I didn't mean to disturb you. I thought I might take a walk around."
Megan smiled and pulled her nightgown closer.
"If you think it will help. Did our session disturb you that much, Scott?"
Scott hung his head slightly, looking for the right words. After a moment, he decided the truth might just be the best way to handle this.
"I guess so, Megan. I'm not precisely sure what I was supposed to say in that room. You do know how much I regretted having to give the order to destroy that station, don't you?"
Megan sat in on the sofa and crossed her legs, trying to look comfortable. Scott knew her well enough to know from her facial expression that she was not comfortable, far from it.
"Yes Scott, I do know how much you regretted giving that order. The whole point of these exercises is to help you find a way to forgive yourself. You did what you had to do as a Starfleet officer and as a husband. Qo'lek told me that he said that the death you granted me was far better than any type of life I would have had with Mitchell. Believe me, I completely agree with him. Mitchell was a monster, worse yet, he was a psycho monster. Believe me, I would angrier if you didn't fire that torpedo!"
Scott sat down next to Megan and wrapped his arm around her. Megan immediately fell into his shoulder and cuddled next to him. It suddenly occurred to Scott that Megan and he hadn't spent a moment like this in a very long time. Taking command of DS9 and then having to deal with Dukat and Mitchell so soon after had taken a toll on their personal life. He didn't really feel like her husband anymore. He felt more like her commanding officer and as such, felt like showing any form of affection toward her was almost wrong. Suddenly, it made sense to him and he knew what he had to do. He turned to face Megan and gathered her face into his hands.
"Megan, I love you."
Megan kissed him long and hard, like the way they used to when they were still young. She wrapped her arms around Scott's neck, forcing all her own pent-up feelings into the moment.
"I know that, Scott. I just wanted you to know that for yourself."
They kissed again, staring into each other's eyes and focused on the thought in each other's souls. Megan's eyes sparkled like a young girl, and then flashed bright purple. Scott pulled back, staring at Megan with amazement.
"Megan?"
Megan relaxed her hold on him, realizing her secret was out.
"Before you start, Scott, I wasn't sure if it I would stay this way so I didn't want to say anything. You had more than enough to worry about. Now, I realize that whatever this is, it's permanent. In fact, if anything, it's getting stronger. I just avoid using it. I guess I let my guard down a little too much that time."
"Does anyone else know?" Scott realized that now was the time to be her commander again.
"Yes, Korryn knows and she's been keeping an eye on it. Joyel knows too. I'm sorry, Scott, I would have told you soon, no matter what, you have to believe that."
"Oh, I believe it, but that doesn't help. Megan, you have to promise me, no more secrets. No matter how busy I am or whatever going on, I will always make time for you, I swear. Do you promise?"
"I promise," Megan, answered, somewhat sheepishly. Scott always liked it when he felt in control and she knew just when to employ the little I'm-at-your-mercy voice to win him over. "Can we talk about it more in the morning, Scott? It's a little cold in the bed right now."
She stood and took his hand, leading him from the sofa and into the bedroom. Sometime during the night, Scott realized he might just like the purplish glow while they made love.
The first thing in the morning, Scott woke up Dr. Mayes with instructions to meet him and Megan in the sickbay. Scott also had Major Tayna to join them. He had some tough questions for the three of them, Megan, Joyel and Korryn, but he couldn't really blame them. After a through examination of Megan with a clean bill of health, one of many in the past few weeks he was sure, the women sat down and waited for Scott to begin.
"Okay, Megan explained last night why you two didn't report this to me and I guess I can understand her reasons. I trust you would have mentioned it if you perceived any danger to the station. I will say this, however, in the future, I want anything reported that isn't of a strictly personal nature, is that clear?"
"Very clear, Commander," Megan spoke for the three in a very formal tone.
Scott smiled. This was a time for formality, but coming from Megan, it was almost laughable.
"Megan," Scott continued, "is there any other 'powers' that you've discovered, other than the ability to change eye color?"
"Not that I've noticed, Scott. I haven't really tried, to be honest. I remember everything I did as Adoyi Nvda and I think I could do it again. I just don't remember going to el'Aena, other than going there with the rest of the crew on the Defiant. My time on Empok Nor is a bit vague, but I suspect that is just as well."
"I know a way to find out," Dr. Mayes interrupted, "let's go to the Arboretum and test my theory."
The others understood immediately and got up to leave. If Megan could still perform the same type of miracle she did on Bajor, they would all soon know.