Disclaimer: Naruto is the property of Kishimoto Masashi. Plot and certain details are of my own creation.
Author's Note: Revised; section added at the end.
Chapter 1
The Trap-Setter
The Hakodate Grand Hotel was an awe-inspiring edifice. 77 stories of rooms, suites, penthouses, indoor pools, indoor gardens, lounges, restaurants, and all manner of entertainment; any imaginable amenity was present or could be arranged for. It was an almost exclusive province of the rich, famous, and usually glamorous. Anyone passing through its gilded doors first had to wade through a sea of paparazzi; zealously guarding any visitor's attempt to enter or leave without paying lockage, assessed by frantically spent rolls of film.
TOWHEAD had decided—democratically, of course—to commandeer one of its many luxury penthouses. A generous infusion of cash to the lead hotelier and the Hibiscus Suite penthouse was now off-limits except to a small crew of contractors working on its renovation. It was the perfect base of operations. Private elevator, private terrace, 1000-thread-count sheets; most importantly, the Hibiscus Suite had its own hot tub and a full bar.
After spending three rainy days in the forests of Kaminari obscuring their trail, and dealing with the odd ninja, modern comfort had gone immediately to TOWHEAD's head. While her teammates Kouhi and Tenko had made a beeline towards the alcohol, the first thing on Ino's mind was cleaning up.
ANBU service made incredible demands of a person, but it didn't mean she should just let herself go. And besides, there wasn't even a point in comparing her apartment's furo to the monstrosity the hotel billed as a personal spa. Asuma-sensei had always said, 'Teachers open the doors, but you must enter by yourself." She'd taken it to heart and flopped into the water like a noodle, half-heartedly attempting to wash away grime and blood before giving up and relaxing.
Ino sighed into the steam. "Did you know this passion-mango aromatherapy oil is almost 6000 ryo? I should be able to redistribute the hotel's entire stock into a container scroll by the time we're done with this mission. I'm sure you'll be able to do the same with all that booze, right Kouhi?
"Nakata Hide, Ino. Surname, given name, even honorifics if you want, but no code names when we're not on the job. I bet Uzumaki already has this place sealed up tighter than some corseted virgin. Operational paranoia is great, but—"
"Trust in your teammate and don't let it get in the way of the easy life between missions," Naruto finished with flourish, and a cannonball.
He energetically went to work scrubbing sealing ink from his hands. "This place is even tighter. Nothing comes in; nothing goes out; not without me letting it, not even chakra and sound. Entrance tags are on the table, use Tiger-Dragon-Tiger to activate and deactivate."
"Kitchen raid once we're done?" Ino said. "I'm too tired for anything else. I just want to set up the mission board and pass out. What are we even doing here? Why do I have to be here during Fashion Week and be on a mission at the same time?"
Naruto grinned. "Well Hide and I are going to be fangasming over Ishikawa Rika for the next week." The grin widened. "Ero-sennin's covert photography lessons are going to come in handy. You on the other hand..." Naruto trailed off in a very familiar blush-and-giggle routine Ino was sure she'd seen somewhere.
Hide looked comically clueless; probably more shocked by his dripping hair than any apparent perverseness Naruto could drag him into. One time, Anko, flush off her latest most prestigious one-night stand, had meticulously documented and referenced all of his hair care products. She had dazedly mumbled something about 30000 ryo to the ANBU Ladies in passing the next day.
By seniority alone, Hide should have been captain of TOWHEAD. Hell, even she had more relevant experience in the Intelligence Division than Naruto, but there was no arguing with his overall mission record and ability.
During TOWHEAD's last dead period—three months ago damn it!—the Gossip had all but said he was being fast-tracked through both ANBU divisions on Sakuya-hime's explicit order. Ino sighed again. She knew that not everyone could follow the Kakashi-career-trajectory. But honestly, Ino couldn't help being a little jealous, and intimidated.
She glanced up. Hide had been poking her foot with his toe quite insistently for the past few minutes. Any normal person, most shinobi even, would have seen an impassive aristocratic blonde. She noticed the slight curl to his lips and read him instantly; abject fury.
He gestured with his shoulders, and when Naruto turned back around with the soap bottle, his face met a torrent of water. He sputtered, only for a moment, before quickly flashing through a set of seals and dropping a whirlpool on their heads. Hide adroitly deflected part of it into Ino's face and the battle was on. Their impromptu water war ended in decidedly childish giggles, intensifying when they noticed how the once pristine bathroom was more akin to a small lake.
Ino pushed her hair out of eyes and settled back down to soak contentedly. She'd let Naruto get away with whatever dirty thoughts he was sure to be harboring, for now.
Ino reveled in the plushness of her new luxury spa robe. Long loop terry inner lining, silk floral outer shell; she'd be more than a little sad when they were done in Hakodate. So rarely did TOWHEAD get assigned a mission where downtime actually allowed them to relax, and in such style!
She made her way down to the penthouse's first level. A few of Naruto's Kage Bunshins must have made their way to the kitchens while they were all in the bath. The dining table was covered in food, delicious no doubt. Hide was mixing what looked to be a killer set of cocktails. Naruto on the other hand was all business again.
While Hide had been dealing with the hotelier, she and Naruto had made a quick circuit of Hakodate, hitting a series of dead drops to pick up auxiliary information gathered in the past weeks about their mission objective.
Naruto had taken all the paintings off one wall of the living room, pinning up a number of scrolls and what looked to be surveillance photos; a make-shift mission board detailing any information that could possible pertain to their orders and targets, ranging from sexual orientation to preferred lunch dishes.
Ino began stacking food on a plate, listing off food she never had the time eat because of ANBU's draconian scheduling ninjas. She lost track the first time after kushiabe, and again when she started filling up another plate.
Ino wrinkled her nose at Hide's amused smirk. "I need to make sure I get lots of nutrients so my breasts stay firm. ANBU ration bars can only do so much," she drawled.
Ino couldn't understand how she ever had tried to diet to improve her figure when she was so young; chalking it up to premature teen angst, and a growing understanding of true hunger.
Naruto's bunshins were frantically pinning up scrolls with him now. The smell of food was obviously working its magic. Hide pushed a coffee table and sofa in front of their board and sat down with three gigantic cocktail glasses, a plate piled with food similar to Ino's, and of course a full set of silverware and napkins. While his sometimes foul mouth contrasted with his noble looks, his meticulous etiquette training did not.
Ino on the other hand had no qualms about talking with food in her mouth. "So what's the deal? I hope we have mostly daytime work so we can hit the nighttime shows." Hide flicked a piece of tempura at her, a disgusted expression drifting across his face.
"No work, food and drink only." Naruto silently agreed with Hide, taking a plate prepared for him—Ino wished she could perform Kage Bunshin sometimes—and a seat between them.
Naruto sniffed his cocktail and set a questioning look at Hide.
"A.M.F. You said we started officially tomorrow, so, uh, great opportunity for, uh, fun?" Naruto grinned in response and raised his glass for a cheer.
After they'd eaten and finished cleaning up, Ino and Hide settled back for Naruto's précis. The ANBU ninja who usually assigned missions had a bad habit of being too wordy, obscuring the objective with useless information. Ino attributed some of TOWHEAD's high mission percentage recently to Naruto's directness.
"This is a joint Intelligence-Assassination mission, main target, Ishikawa Rika. Have you have heard of her Ino?"
"She's pretty cute." Ino threw a chopstick at Hide. Naruto threw fire at both of them.
"Ino?"
"She was on the cover of fruIts last year and the cover of fashionKUMO a couple months ago."
"Besides that, she's the child of a major daimyo in Ikazuchi no kuni; one sibling, an older brother being groomed to take his father's position. She's the complete opposite. Her father sent her to various elite boarding schools in Kaminari, ending up as a scholarship student at Sapporo University. She's highly visible in the fashion world as an occasional model and designer. Because of her high class schooling, she has many personal connections in the business and ruling elite.
"Right now Rika's on break from university, spending time in Hakodate for Fashion Week, and then directly after, traveling to her family's castle. In the next two weeks a number of Kaminari, Ikazuchi, Tanima, and Konoha daimyo and their entourages, along with shinobi representatives will be gathering for a summit.
"I'm not going into details about it—don't have many—but the higher ups think Rika can definitely be turned into an asset. They said that even though she's a girl, her father and brother do listen to her opinions. They know her connections even if they don't have her use them directly. If she wanted, she could have a surprising amount of political influence. We have to turn that potential into our tool.
"Rika doesn't normally travel with any bodyguards but she will be escorted to Ikazuchi, and guarded during the summit, by a team of ninja contracted by her father. Hide and I, along with members of Assassination Squad 3 will replace those shinobi.
"As intelligent as Rika is, she's been very sheltered. Great news for us is that she's also romantically challenged. That's where we'll make our play." Naruto handed each a thick manila folder. "The mission brief and its sources. Make your notes and we'll finalize the operation tomorrow. Early questions?"
Hide shook his head and dug right into the mass of pictures and papers.
Ino silently took in the mission board, absently chewing on her lip, eyes darting back and forth over numerous scrolls before settling on a blown up picture of Rika.
Naruto held back a smirk. He knew sometimes Ino couldn't wrap her mind around a Naruto competent in a field she'd trained her whole life to excel in. He liked to think they were rivals in a sense, both nontraditional prodigies in areas of shinobi expertise no one ever wanted to get their hands dirty with.
Ino's eyes narrowed and Naruto allowed his smirk to break through. She was very clever, quick enough to make use of it, and ruthless enough to not let it consume her. But in some senses, she was still a loud obnoxious twelve-year-old obsessed with the fairy tale ending.
"A lesbian?!"
Naruto laughed and held his hands up apologetically. "You're the best choice for this mission. You'll have to turn into a redhead—she likes them—but if we do everything right, we can run that summit."
Hide stood up with an exaggerated yawn and gathered up his mission materials, his face carefully blank. "I'm going to turn in. It's been a long day." He casually sauntered towards the stairs, pausing to call over his shoulder, "Don't forget the carpet Ino." By the time the kunai thudded into the wall behind him, Hide was safely upstairs in his room.
"So—"
"Don't even say anything Naruto!"
Ino stalked upstairs to her bedroom to stew in the comfort of her king bed. She had no problems with the mission, but it was already trying to even think of all the snide jokes and comments Hide and Naruto would make at her expense. The situation would be quickly rectified though. A womanly beat down always put them in their place, preferably before breakfast so they could all start the day off right.
Naruto stared at the stairs for a few minutes. He could hear Ino stomping around above him. Hide was probably asleep already. Ino would follow soon enough. Hide hadn't been entirely sarcastic when he said it had been a long day. Soaking in the hot tub had been nice, but it had been a long month.
The Kyuubi's chakra was a great supplement to his own stamina, but everyone needed to sleep to recharge. Soldier pills could only go so far. Ino had to have passed out by now also. The soak hadn't done much for her besides soothing some of the temporary aches and pains.
Naruto approached the wall containing the central node of the system of seals monitoring the penthouse. He closed his eyes, laid a hand on the large central symbol, and flared his chakra. Lines of characters pulsed outwards, glowing with increasing intensity as he pumped more energy into the node.
They snaked over the floor, scaling the walls, twirling violently upstairs. Naruto stood like this for a few minutes, molding chakra directly into the node, directing more tendrils upstairs before they all came back in a swirling rush, their information obtained and the impulse read.
Naruto opened his eyes. Hide and Ino were asleep. He had assumed correctly, but in such an imprecise line of work, it was always comforting to be able to deal in absolutes from time to time.
Naruto fished a pack of cigarettes and lighter out of his pocket before stepping out onto the balcony. He leaned against the railing, fumbling with the plastic wrap protecting them. The cigarettes had made the trek without becoming wet. He wished TOWHEAD could have said the same. Naruto teased a cigarette out of the pack, lighting it with a quick snap of his fingers before turning around to face a ninja slowly bleeding out of the shadows.
Naruto greeted him with a curt nod and tossed him the cigarettes. The ninja tugged off his mask, a deer, lighting a cigarette with the same efficient finger-snap, joining him against the railing to look out over the city below.
Naruto began without preamble. "How hard did you have to push for us to get the Hakodate assignment?"
"Too hard. We were barely able to get you scrubbed in Hokuto. It's getting a little tight down south for all of our incoming and outgoing birds. Getting Ishikawa Rika is going to be huge for us."
"Be careful."
"Speak for yourself. You never were the worrying type before."
Naruto read the implicit question. "Some things need to be worried about. Ero-sennin says that I'm just starting to get old."
The ninja looked at Naruto, a sardonic smile pulling at his lips. "You better keep worrying. We're far away from the denouement, but I do bring good news of a sort."
"Ero-sennin said his final draft of the new Icha-Icha would be done soon."
"Idiot, and yes he finished it. But for real; Danzou is dead. A heart attack just like you said would happen. It was written as a transmural myocardial infarction after the fact, blamed on old age and one too many combat missions way back when."
"And no one suspects anything?"
"You know they don't. Autopsy showed exactly what was expected, an old man done in by a heart attack. Even if they did think to look for poison, it would be for signs of exposure, not for withdrawal."
"And so Neji has ROOT."
"And so Neji has ROOT."
Naruto threw his butt over the railing and lit another. He pocketed the pack after his companion shook out a second. They stood in silence, puffing away, dark thoughts soothed by the combination of chilly air and warm smoke.
Naruto stared at the rain. It would give them definite advantages over the next week when the time came to deal with Rika's shinobi guards, but it would complicate Ino's assignment just as much. Coiffure and make-up never got along well with water. Neither would high-heels and couture.
"Ino doesn't seem to be happy about this mission."
"Ino's always been like that; bitches about everything, but she'll get it done."
"Oh, I know. She's very talented, but still too loud sometimes. We're going to get an earful from her tomorrow about not being perverted. I think she needs to get away from Sakura more."
"Too troublesome, but try to control her a little. We'll meet again in Ikazuchi if I can manage it."
Naruto nodded. By the time he turned to wave goodbye, the ninja had already disappeared back into the darkness.
Sakura opened her eyes and looked at the chakra flickering across her fingers. She brought her palms together and slowly exhaled. Manifested chakra slowly receded, seeping under her fingernails, absorbed by her chakra coils. She always began her day with a set of simple chakra exercises. Tsunade had taught her those early, taking great pains to impress the importance of a well-balanced chakra system to a ninja, especially for med-nins like themselves.
Sakura stood and bent over her exercise mat, pink to match her hair, stretching her palms toward the floor, slowly moving through a series of motions meant to loosen up her muscles. Sasuke had been long gone when she'd woken up, mattress cold, half the bed made—she still couldn't figure out how he did it while she was sleeping—an extra blanket draped over her, and a scroll slipped into her grasp; whose early abrupt message, in all forms, turned her stomach.
The calendar had a date one week later circled in red, the day Sasuke hoped to be back. They'd worked out the system early—Sakura; pink, Sasuke; red—unable to discuss anything more than generalities about their missions; A-rank and highly dangerous, a far cry from the meager D-rank offerings they'd first been assigned seven years ago.
She straightened, clasping her hands behind her, leaning forwards to stretch her back, working out the kinks that came with too much hospital paperwork in a most uncomfortable desk chair. Once she was done stretching, Sakura showered quickly and economically, a small thread of nervousness working its way through her neck.
Sakura forced herself to eat a hearty breakfast. The next few days were bound to be grueling. 'An examination of the darkest parts of your soul,' Kakashi-sensei had called it a week ago when she'd been cleared to take the fieldS certification exam. She thought he was referring to his own ANBU examinations, but since both tests were conducted under the strict authority of the Dark Forces, Sakura had been beset by a minor bout of apprehension.
Clad in a rarely used Jounin uniform, Sakura slipped out of the window and set off, flickering across the rooftops. The sun was finally out, shining over a bazaar bursting with energy, mocking her desire to take a lazy day meandering through its many stalls with Sasuke, both of them denied by events outside their control.
Sakura came to a stop in front of the only entrance to Yamajiro she knew, yet. The ANBU HQ was literally a rock fortress, burrowed deep into and under Hokage Mountain. Shizune waved, handing her a warm honey bun from her favorite bakery as Sakura fell into step along side her.
"For good luck. I still remember my fieldS. You don't need to worry too much about it. Don't make that face. You passed this level a long time ago. Just be precise and stay calm. Some of the examiners tend to be a little sadistic." Shizune nodded to the two ANBU guarding a door hewn into the rock before it swung open to a dark corridor, faintly lit by forever-burning torches.
Sakura declined to say anything, lost to her own thoughts, happy to let Shizune keep up a one-sided conversation. She knew Shizune was doing it for her sake, trying to ease some of the nervousness now radiating through her body. They came to a stop in front of another door.
Before they could enter, Kakashi slipped out, only identifiable by a dog mask accented in black—the mark of a captain—and a shock of wild steel hair. He only nodded to them both before taking Sakura's elbow and leading her into a caliginous maze.
He didn't say anything, only directing her around invisible corners and unseen doors before stopping at a gate covered in a faintly glowing seal. Even though she couldn't see much, Sakura knew he was looking at her, asking her to look underneath the underneath.
"I can't get through it, not yet. There are too many loops for me to deal with."
Kakashi didn't reply, touching a hand thrown into hazy relief against the gate. The seal rippled and melted away allowing them to pass. Sakura only had time to see it slowly beginning to reform itself over her shoulder before the darkness engulfed them again. She didn't know how long it had been before Kakashi came to a stop and pushed her through one final door, closing it behind her. Sakura's eyes, and ears, took a minute adjusting to a room illuminated by a panel of screaming fluorescent lights.
"Nagai-san, Yoshinuma-san." Sakura greeted the only two people in the room with a small bow before taking a seat on the only remaining fold-out chair. She knew they would be here. At this level, all the med-nin were well acquainted with their colleagues, personally and professionally. Any conversation that might have been, died as a woman—no mask!?—glided into the room, apparently not feeling any disorientation moving from dark to light.
Sakura was immediately alert. Unlike Tsunade who took great pains to look and act unlike that which she was, Hokage, this woman wore her power and experience like a latex catsuit. No one said a word, waiting to be addressed by the person obviously in charge.
"I am Sakuya. You know me."
And who didn't? ANBU Commander Sakuya-hime was as reclusive as expected of someone of her rank; but half-truths and legends held no such restrictions upon themselves, creating an image held in rarified reverence equal only to the Hokage and Gama Sennin Jiraiya.
"Don't look so surprised to see me. The fieldS exam and its certification are vital to Konoha's ability to field combat and intelligence missions at ANBU's highest levels. While you may not choose to pursue all the opportunities opened to you after completing this exam, there are literally no limits if you do so, I the best example.
"The exam will be administered by five examiners including myself. We'll be assisted by a number of ANBU candidates in both the Combat Division and the Intelligence Division. The exam will be conducted over the course of five days through a set of practical and field exams. Do not assume this will be in any way similar to the fieldB and fieldA certification exams. Those that do have a tendency to prematurely expire."
Sakuya left the room as smoothly as she had entered, leaving behind three stunned med-nin. Shizune's reassurances seemed a lifetime ago to Sakura. While she was confident in her own abilities, the shock at actually being addressed so cavalierly by a legend—who would be evaluating them herself—left her with growing apprehension. Her train of thought didn't even leave the station, stopped by the three cloaked and masked ANBU phasing into existence behind them, senbon fanning across their fingers. Sakura managed a reflexive punch before she lost consciousness.
There are distinct advantages to leading a platoon that doesn't exactly exist; such a broad range of missions it's capable of performing without the hassles of blacking out words upon words in hallways of scroll-boxes. Covert extraditions, assassinations, even dealing with the always useful and omnipresent criminal element; all manner of missions could be performed without involving bureaucratic rigmarole. Jack-of-all-trades-ness aside, ROOT also never had any of the inevitable personal problems that came with the Special Ops ego. Rather, there was a distinct lack of personality, which made it excessively simple to command for a relatively inexperienced Captain. One, who for the first time in his life had scored in the lowest percentile of an examination—Leadership and Gender Management; a Captain like Neji.
A Captain like Neji, who had no problems being the Unemotional Leader, no problems fulfilling a myriad of shinobi duties, but did have a distinct distaste for mephitic sewers and rivers of refuse, gloomy and gloopy and grating. This particular sewer was one of the worst he'd ever had to slog through. His squad fanned out behind him, a depressed diamond cut in half by a few hundred feet, slipping around corners, following dim chakra markers Neji left on the walls. At each streak, markers of pre-planned junction points, the trailing pair applied a combination of high-yield explosive tags and camouflage seals, taking painstaking care to ensure the chakra cord trunkline was properly routed and connected. Practically, any evidence left behind would point towards Konoha, and war; dramatically, simultaneous explosions always looked better from a vantage point; practically, simultaneous explosions were rarely caused by pressure overflows or resistance movements; dramatically, Neji had hints of obsessive-compulsiveness about spontaneous displays, of anything.
Not that the current operation was anything but planned. From initial viability to end-point logistics, ROOT never overlooked any detail that could possibly come into play. Squad 1 and their mission had been buoyed; well, Neji and his mission planning had been buoyed by the torrential rains of the past weeks. A combined sewer system could only take so much. It was a much riskier proposition to fake sewer blockages and system overloads than it was to provide a few helpful nudges to an already overflowing subterranean labyrinth no one had the decency to maintain. With that in mind, executing the mission was all teriyaki sauce.
Neji knew what would happen as they closed out this operation. The rest of Squad 1 would sneak off into the forest to train for several hours a day. He'd wile nights away gathering valuable intelligence in the bars. The rest of Squad 1 would sit and stare at the walls of their hotel rooms for several hours a day. He'd play the epicure, taking the local pulse by frequenting various restaurants around the city. And on the third day after they emerged from the sewers, grimy and unseen—except by a slowly decomposing drunk—they'd watch civilians scream and separate into pieces along with the ground underneath them.
Author's Note: Just about a month to get this out, only two weeks over schedule. Not bad since I've never been a consistent writer. I had lots of trouble with Sakura (I can't help but feel her entire short portion is completely awkward), though TOWHEAD just flowed right out of me. I've got a rough outline of the next three chapters on paper, though it'll take me some time to flesh them out. The entire story is still coagulating in my head, but soon I'll have all the important details set. I think then I'll really be able to write with confidence and speed.
Again, please leave your thoughts and constructively critical reviews. I really do want to improve my grammar, flow, and prose.