A/N: Thank you to everyone who review last chapter! Here is the next one, a little bit angsty, but its all for a reason i promise. Everything you recognise belongs to Stephanie, including the wolf history/legend/thingy, Diana and Alex are mine. Read, Review, Enjoy!

Supernova

Chapter 7: "Somebody Hit The Light 'Cause There Is More Here To Be Seen." – The Editors, An End Has A Start.

I had done many stupid things in my life. The most stupid to date was agreeing that getting drunk on cheap beer with Danny in my bedroom was a better option than school. For a start I didn't even really like Danny, but he was offering, and he was reasonably good-looking so it seemed like an ok idea at the time. And for another I was too giddy with the drink that I forgot to lock the door to my room.

I loved alcohol, the feeling I got from it – like the world was just one big adventure playground waiting for me to swing off the monkey bars and into oblivion. I loved the way it let you forget (if you drank enough, and I always did). Forget everything that came before and everything that came after so that the only place in existence was the present. The present held no regrets, no 'what might have been', just now, now, now…

But you can't have a present without a past; it always crept up dark and damning, one step behind at every turn, the past would never leave me alone.

When Jacob Black finally answered the door his eyes widened in surprise at the sight of me, he clearly hadn't been expecting my visit. "Alex?"

"I want to know what is going on and I want to know now."

I was feeling fierce, eyes blazing, ready for the fight I thought was inevitable.

"Ok." He said, deflating my sails, looking miserable.

"Ok?"

He shrugged. "I would have liked a bit more time, but I can't say no if you're determined." Then he stepped aside and gestured for me to enter. "Come in. I think I need to call Leah."

"But Leah said…" I began, still a little taken aback by the apparent ease with which I was getting my way.

"I know," Jacob said running a hand over his face and pinching the bridge of his nose, he appeared much older than his 16 years. "She's your friend though, and I think it will be kinder for you if she's here. You don't trust me enough."

The last comment seemed to cause him pain and he winced as he said it, but I couldn't deny the truth in his words. Sure, I felt something around him. Lust? Attraction? Possible friendship? And a deeper emotion bubbling under the surface that scared me with its sudden intensity at times, but I barely knew him. The thought of Leah being there actually calmed me somewhat and I nodded climbing the steps into his house, feeling the heat from his body as I passed.

A part of my brain was still screaming at me to turn around and run. It was blocked by a bigger, more curious part.

"The kitchen is through there," he pointed over my shoulder. Following his direction I was almost in the tiny room when he spoke again. "Alex?" I turned back. He was stood in the hallway next to the telephone, the smallness of his house only served to make him look like Alice in wonderland when she drank the drink that made her grow so big she blocked out the doorway. Those dark eyes fixed on mine, burning. "I just want you to know that whatever happens I never want to hurt you. That even if you don't think you can, you can always trust me, I promise. I'm here, whenever you want me, however you want me, if you ever want me. Just know that. Always."

"I…" I was speechless, my heart thudding erratically against my ribs. I swallowed past the lump in my throat.

Jacob somehow knew that I wasn't going to be making any comments anytime soon, or perhaps he just realised that the stuffy heat was freaking me out. Either way he smiled and, though I couldn't remember, it felt like it was the first time, maybe it was.

It wasn't helping my heartbeat any but the atmosphere relaxed, eased. "How's your ankle holding up?"

"B… better," was all I managed to get out.

"Cool. Alright then," he removed his eyes from me and lifted the phone, "I guess I got to call Leah."

Blinking a bit like a mole with its first taste of sunlight I wandered into the kitchen. It was brighter than the hall, airier too, but the relief I felt over getting out of that hallway was short-lived.

"Hello there. You must be Alexandra."

The voice was deep, masculine, old. It held that hint of wisdom, the kind that only comes with age and knowledge. He was sat at the table, with a mug of coffee, he had been reading the sports section of the newspaper before I entered and was now smiling calmly up at me.

"Hi?" I mumbled. I was feeling distinctly out of my depth now. This had to be Jacob's father, and that alone made me nervous.

"Would you like a drink?" He pushed back from the table, which was when I first noticed that he was in a wheelchair.

"Uh, no thanks. I'm just… waiting…" what was I waiting for exactly?

My bumbling didn't bother him one bit he just nodded rolling back into place at the table. "I'm Billy, Jacob's father." He introduced himself holding a hand out to me.

I had to step fully into the room to take it. He was warm, but not to the extreme of his son, and the grip was firm. "Alex Grant."

"You have no idea what a pleasure it is to meet you."

There was such sincerity in his words that all I could do for a moment was smile, a little shakily. "Jacob's talked about me?"

Billy had what could only be described as mischief in his eyes then. "Just a bit. Go easy on him."

Why did everyone keep saying that to me? It was as if the idea of Jacob and me actually being together was an inevitability to them all, a matter of time. "Now why should I do that?"

I thought I may have insulted him, but he grinned, catching the tease in my voice, shaking his head. "Because, believe it or not, my son cares a great deal about you, Alex."

My mouth opened to ask why that was, why a guy I barely knew should give a damn about me in any way, when Jacob strode into the room and glared at his father. "Finished embarrassing me old man?"

Billy chuckled. "Not yet, give us a minute."

Jacob ignored his ribbing and walked across to the back door that lead out into the garden. "Leah's going to meet us in a bit."

"Oh," I tried to sound like I was completely at ease, that this was what I really wanted. "Out there?"

I wasn't fooling Jacob. "You don't have to do this now." There was a hint of hope. "It's up to you."

"No, I'm fine. Now is as good a time as any." And I strode as confidently as I could manage out the open door and into the garden.

It wasn't much of a garden, just a wide patch of grass with trees edging it. Behind a clump of them I could see a ramshackle looking shed. Jacob, who had followed behind me, saw where my gaze landed. "That's my workshop."

I could smell the sea and it calmed me; the thick, warm, afternoon air surrounded me like a blanket. "What do you work on?"

"Mechanical stuff mainly," he said, sounding a little distracted. "Cars, Bikes, that kind of thing."

I twisted to look up at him; he was peering out at the forest with his brows drawn down over his eyes, the light breeze playing with his hair, sunlight catching on his russet skin. He was the nicest thing I had ever seen. "Do you build them?"

His eyes dropped to me and I looked away. "I repair most of the time. I built my rabbit practically from scratch and my…" he hesitated. "My bike."

I couldn't help it. "Is that like a push bike?"

He pulled a face. "Sure, a push bike. I've even taken the stabilizers off. Seriously, it's totally manly."

"That is manly. Can I see? Do you have a cute little bell and streamers from the handlebars?"

"Uh huh, real cute."

"Oh, and a basket! It has to have a basket."

"I'll let you have a go if you're good." We were playing with each other, our humour in sync, bantering, and I was enjoying it. Good to know he had a lighter side.

Making my eyes as large as I could and pouting out my bottom lip I turned up to him. "But I'm always a good girl."

The laughter was in his eyes but he held it in. "Yeah? I bet."

"Alex! Jacob!"

We turned away from each other, grins falling, to see Leah jogging out from the trees; she came to a stop in front of us, her face concerned. The seriousness of the situation came back to me. "Thanks for coming Leah," Jacob said.

"No problem," she replied, easily, not looking away from me. "You alright Alex? Are you sure about this?"

All doubts I had about her honesty vanished. Whoever took those pictures from Callum it wasn't Leah, I was sure. Maybe he just misplaced them. "I'm fine. I want to know what is going on and one of you two is going to tell me."

They shot each other sidelong glances. "Sure. Uh, Jacob?"

He shifted nervously, as uncomfortable as if he was standing on shards of glass. I raised an eyebrow. What was so difficult for them to tell me? "Is it drugs?" I finally blurted out.

There was silence until Leah scoffed and Jacob let out a low breath. "No," he almost laughed, "it's not drugs. It is a little more complicated than that."

"Ok, so…" I made a hand gesture for him to 'take it away'.

"Start from the beginning," Leah advised helpfully and Jacob nodded his agreement to the plan.

Deciding that hesitation was not getting any of us anywhere he launched forward then into the tale, the truth, I hoped. "When our tribe first came here, many, many years ago we possessed a kind of magic…"

"Magic? Guys I don't want a fairytale, I want the truth." I folded my arms across my chest, wondering if they were trying to fob me off.

"This is the truth," Leah insisted quietly.

Jacob was concerned. "Do you want to sit down, Alex? This might take a while."

"No I don't."

"Sure, sure." He shrugged my rudeness off and continued. "As I was saying… Our tribe has always had magic in its blood. It is said that we possessed the ability to remove our spirits from our bodies in order to frighten away opposing tribes, we were called spirit warriors." Where was this heading? I didn't understand what was going on, only that Jacob's voice was hypnotic and Leah had looped her arm around my waist, whether to hold me up or keep me in place I wasn't sure, but it was comforting, grounding me so that I didn't get swept up in the tale. "Taha Aki was the first of our leaders to join his spirit with that of an animal, a wolf." I shivered. Wolf. It kept coming back to them.

"One time when he left his body another tribe man stole into it and returned to lead our people as if he was Taha Aki. With no body to return to his spirit roamed the lands waiting for another spirit of the tribe to join him. But they had been ordered by the impostor not to change, and so they had no knowledge of the deception.

"Spirits have always had a link with animals, they are aware of them in a way humans are not. Taha Aki tried to use a wolf to kill the traitor but it didn't work. So then he had the idea of sharing the wolf's body, because even a wolf's body is better than none at all, and so for the first time man joined with wolf.

"Together they went to the village. The warriors came out to meet them but the wolf backed away trying to yelp the songs of the village, communicating with its eyes. They realised that it was no simple wolf and one man attempted to speak with it so he left his body and entered the spirit world. Taha Aki fled from the wolf to reveal himself to the man, but the traitor had arrived on the scene and saw at once what was happing. He rushed to the man's helpless body and when the spirit returned in a panic he killed him.

"Taha Aki's anger at this was so great, hatred so strong, and love for his people so deep that when he entered the wolfs body again it couldn't cope with the emotions and transformed into a human form. It was not the form Taha Aki possessed as a man, but far greater, his spirit form made flesh, and the warriors recognised him immediately. He killed the traitor and resumed his place as chief, but he was no longer just man or wolf but both. And ruled for a long time, never aging.

"When some of his many sons reached puberty they found that they too could transform into wolves and some joined their father to become warriors, protectors of the tribe. The others did not like it so much and returned to their human forms, and they began to age. That is how it came to be that the descendants of Taha Aki are able to change forms from man to wolf."

Everything seemed suddenly so much quieter when he finished, like silence after a storm, and in the distance I heard the waves crashing against the shore. They were watching me, I felt their eyes burning into me, but I couldn't look at them, I stared out into the forest. "I…" I began, my voice sounding strange to my own ears, nervous. "I don't understand what this story has to do with you."

"Don't you see?" Leah hushed in my ear, soothing. "We are the protectors of La Push. We are the wolf warriors."

"That… that…" my mind was fumbling over itself in a desperate attempt to deny what they were trying to tell me, "doesn't make sense." The monsters were clawing at the closet door, nightmares desperate to get out. Panic rushed through me. "It was a story," I insisted. "People don't turn into wolves. Magic doesn't exist."

"Yes it does," Jacob breathed. "Yes they do."

"No." It was firmer this time, as if I was trying to convince them. I backed out of Leah's arms and she let me go, wary. "No it doesn't." But they were looking at me with fear and compassion in their beautiful, wild eyes, and I felt myself tremble. "Stop it!" I demanded, pushing back against the door, refusing to let them out, not now, not ever. They were stronger. "I asked you to give me the truth! This isn't funny so stop messing with me!"

"Alex, please…" Jacob whispered, soft, pleading. "I can't lie to you, I wouldn't. Try to understand. Trust us. Please. We can show you if that will…"

"No! Why would I want to…? What gives you the…? Bloody hell, what is wrong with you?"

"We're wolves," Jacob said and he seemed to struggle to form the words, "or, werewolves… I swear on my life that we won't hurt you."

He moved forward to me and I jolted two steps back. Hurt flashed through his dark eyes like lightening and he halted, hands still reaching for me. "Stay." I commanded with false authority. "I don't know what it is that you think you're playing at but I thought we were friends." I was addressing them both now, and I couldn't hide my roaring emotions as my eyes desperately begged them to take it all back. "All I wanted was the simple truth. But since you can't even manage that, maybe you can answer this: Who took Callum's pictures?"

The guilt in both of their eyes was palpable. "Brady and Leah did it," Jacob answered slowly, reluctantly, "they're the smallest of the pack."

Pack? As if they really were wolves! I felt the disgust welling up inside, sickening me, I took another step away. "Why?" The question came out like a child's. "Why are there bad people in the world?" "Why isn't Daddy coming home?" "Why does it hurt?"

Leah was the one who answered this time, her voice pleading for me to believe her sincerity, but I was way past that now. "We had to. We couldn't risk it. The possible exposure."

"It was just a wolf!" I cried out, frustration getting the better of me. But even as I said it I knew that it wasn't just a wolf, whatever it was it was not just a wolf. They looked ashamed, heads lowered, eyes never leaving me, pulling at me. "Return them."

Leah's head shook side to side. "We burnt them."

I really thought I was going to be sick then. This was beyond anything I had ever experienced. Was it some sort of cult, twisting and moulding them to believe that they really were wolves? "I…I've got to go. I can't stay here." I turned then and fled.

Out on the street I ran, the houses blurring at the edge of my vision as I turned street after street. The pain spiralled up my ankle letting me focus more on its sharpness than the buzz of thoughts that crowded my head and it was welcome. I heard my name called out after me, but no one followed, and for that I was grateful.

When I reached the bus stop back at the fisheries I halted, panting, eyes watering from the sting in my ankle.

Please make this go away! Please.

The place was empty now, the last bus having left shortly after I arrived, so I pulled out my phone with shaking hands. Diana wasn't happy to find me gone. The sound of her voice – well known, safe, and irritated – calmed me. I must have sounded as bad as I felt because she agreed to come get me without much protest, telling me to stay where I was, that she would be as fast as she could.

It wasn't fast enough. The phone was barely back in my bag when I heard a gut wrenching howl slice through the heavy air. I crumbled to the pavement, my legs giving way as a choked sound broke out from my throat. My nails dug into my palms where I clenched them into white fists against my ears.

Make it go away. Please.

I screwed my eyes shut, curling in on myself where I was sat on the hard concrete, trying to block out the mocking cries of the seagulls' swooping overhead. It was too late. There was nothing I could do, no way to prevent the rough burn of betrayal from consuming me, to stop the nightmares from reaching me.

How could I have been so completely wrong?

What if all this had only been about pulling me into their sick cult? Playing with me, all just a game to them.

I gagged. Everything was too much to stomach.

I didn't hear the car pulling up, nor the clack of her heals as she ran to me, but I felt the strength of her arms holding me, and the familiarity of her voice in my ear. I don't know what she said to get me up and into the car, all I knew was that with the clean click of the door shutting and the purr of the engine my mind cleared.

Diana was talking; I had no idea what it was she was saying. "I want to go home," I said, voice raw.

"We're going to the hospital first." She informed me.

I shook my head. "No, no, I want to go home. I'm fine."

She snorted in a very un-Diana manner. "You are quite clearly not fine Alexandra. What happened?"

"It was nothing." The hospital was not where I wanted to be and she didn't understand. I wanted to go home. "I just haven't eaten today. I got a little sick. That's all."

I stared out at the road ahead so I couldn't see her expression. She let out a long sigh. "Alex…" she didn't believe me. "Please just tell me."

"I just did!" I snapped. "I didn't eat. I felt sick. So I called you. That is all that happened so can I please go home!"

There was a long silence. I waited. "Fine," she finally said, tired. "I will take you home and you can sleep and we will talk about this in the morning."

I shook my head. "No. I want to go home."

"And I am taking you home, Alex!" she was frustrated now, but she wasn't hearing me.

"Home!" I said near shout. "I want to go home! England, my mum, my baby brother, my little sisters, my stepfather, my friends – I want to go home!"

There was a gasp. "Alexandra… what happened? I don't understand. You were happy here. I thought you were happy."

"Well I wasn't. And now I want to leave. So please." I was so close to tears, I felt mentally weak like someone had drained me dry. "Please just let me."

We were pulling up outside the house now. Diana had barely parked the car when I shot out the door and hobbled up the front steps, fumbling for my key and falling into the hallway. I could hear her following behind me, her panicked breathing.

The thudding of my heart as I made for the stairs drowned all other noise out.

I was in the bedroom, searching under the bed for my suitcase when she came in behind me. I hadn't expected such a fight from her. Shouldn't she be pleased to be rid of me?

"Talk to me Alex! Stop shutting people out!"

"I don't want to talk about it!" I yelled back, my hand catching on a sharp piece of plastic and I hissed at the sudden pain. "Just leave me the fuck alone!"

"No! You need to…"

"What the hell do you know about what I need?" I demanded cruelly, tugging the case open in the middle of the floor.

"I know that bottling it all up and hiding is not healthy." Well of course she'd know all about that.

"Oh!" I turned. "'Cause you'd know all about hiding, huh? In your nice neat house, and your nice neat world where everything is correctly ordered and in it's fucking place. Was that why he left you? Couldn't deal with it all? Having to live with such a control freak. No mistakes in this house!" The words were spiteful, nasty and if I was thinking I would have taken them back when I saw the sting in her eyes. But I wasn't thinking, just doing.

I was breathing heavily, like I'd run a marathon, but she stood still as stone, features impassive. When she eventually spoke her voice was calm, precise, her eyes dark. "Oh, I know all about hiding, Alex. I've spent my entire life in hiding from a grief and a betrayal I couldn't get over." She paused, swallowed thickly. "He was an American. Did my sister ever tell you?"

I shook my head, unable to speak, blood rushing through me.

"Beautiful and charming." She gave a small, mocking, smile. "I would have followed him to the ends of the earth so long as he wanted me. I fell pregnant, so we were married (that was just how it was done then) and I moved across the ocean to live with him as his wife. I was so young that it felt like I was a whole world away from my family. I gave up everything for that boy. We weren't happy though, the forced marriage dissolved any of the passion and he grew to see me as merely holding him back, an anchor weighing him down. But he loved the baby growing inside of me, and I made do with that. I was so lonely."

Diana's eyes glittered in the afternoon light, tears gathering in their depths. I didn't want to see her cry, not her, not my calm, ordered aunt. "My baby was born dead." Her voice did not falter once though her hands trembled. A lump was rising in my throat and I was struggling to breathe. I couldn't look at her. "That was it. I had failed him at the only thing I was useful for. He left me. No note, no goodbye, he just never came back." Her eyes were on me then; I couldn't meet them. "I named him Alexander." My breath rushed out, strangled, my nose stung, and the floor grew fuzzy beneath me. "He is buried in the cemetery here, in Forks, and every year I place flowers on his grave stone. Your mother asked, when she fell pregnant with you, if she could name you in honour of him. I agreed. And you were born kicking and screaming and I was overjoyed at my healthy, beautiful niece – Alexandra. But I've never moved on."

She took a deep breath in and out through her nose. "So you see, I know about grief, I know about hiding behind walls that you don't even realise you're building, until you wake up one morning and you're cold and alone. I can't bear to see you…" She faltered, pulled herself together, carried forward. "You can't talk to your mum – I understand that. You can't talk to me – fine. But talk to someone about him, Alex, please, before it consumes you."

I felt sick, I felt like I was going to faint. "This is not about him," I gritted out in a last desperate attempt. I was crawling on the edge of the cliff, fingers slipping, black water churning below. "I just want to go home."

"… Please…" she breathed.

And that was it; I fell with a shuddering breath, last drowning gasp. Diana's arms came around me, held me up, and I buried my face into her shoulder as the pain washed over me, holding on and praying I would make it to the other side.