A/n: Hey, i've read Breaking Dawn and am now trying to forget that i did. This chapter is kind of a filler - in that not alot really happens. The end is in sight, probably one or two more chapters - depending on if you want a sort of epilogue. Yes? No? Thank you to everyone who reviewed.

So i don't own anything you recognise, never have and never will. Read, Review, and Enjoy!

Supernova

Chapter 12: "Always Up For A Laugh, She's A Pain In The Arse. Every Time That We Meet, I Skip A Heartbeat." – Scouting For Girls, Heartbeat.

"Jeez, Alex! How much longer are you going to take?"

I sniggered as the voice called up the stairs. "Keep your trousers on, Jake!"

"I'm going to be grey by the time we get there!"

"No you're not, stop whinging!" Grabbing my hairbrush I dragged it through a few times.

"How come I can get ready in like two minutes?" He asked the eternal question.

Rolling my eyes to the ceiling and slipping my bag over one shoulder I strolled out of my room. "Because," I said as I descended the stairs, "I can't get away with walking around topless and looking like a James Dean wanna be."

Jacob smirked up at me. "You know I wouldn't mind if you did. Walk around topless that is."

Sometimes I forgot that he was a normal teenage boy under all that muscle – then he said things like that. "Yeah, neither would Paul, Collin, Brady, Seth…" I reeled off the names of his mates.

His face darkened. "They wouldn't dare."

I laughed at the possessiveness. "Oh, yeah? What you going to do to stop them?" Going into the kitchen I took the money Diana had left on the table for me and zipped it into my purse.

Suddenly Jacob was behind me, his heat everywhere, chest against my back, lips hovering just below my ear. I shivered. "Because," he husked, breath hot, "I'll ordered them not to, and they know I'd gouge their eyes out if they did."

The curious answer cleared my fuzzy head and I pulled away to peer up with an arched brow. "You'll order them not to?"

"Sure," he shrugged, reaching for me again.

"And that's just it? They have to do what you say?"

"Yeah."

"But I thought Sam was the boss-wolf?"

Jacob sighed. Obviously my moment of inquisitiveness had destroyed the mood. "Sam's alpha. It's not boss-wolf Alex the technical term is alpha. But I'm sort of second in command. Only Sam's orders over-rule mine."

"Oh," I mused. "Why is that?"

Now he was uncomfortable. "It's… well, I'm a direct descendant of Ephraim Black, and he was the last pack leader. The pack leaders are sort of the tribe chief too."

"Right. So why is Sam alpha? Is it because he made the change first?"

"What is with all the questions?" he laughed evasively. "Come on, we're going to be late."

I let him take my hand and drag me from the house to his car, but once we were inside I started up again. He should have known better than to think I would give something as interesting as this up. "So?" I questioned as we pulled away from the curb.

"What?" He asked as if he had absolutely no idea what I was getting at. Nice try, wolf boy.

"Sam? Alpha? How come?" I prompted snatching my packet of Haribo sours from the glove pocket where I left it.

Jacob ran a hand across his face and glared at me. "Give me a cola bottle." I handed over the sweet and waited. "I didn't want it," he said when he finished chewing.

"But you were supposed to?"

"Sure."

"Why didn't you want to?"

"Because I didn't."

"But why?" My persistence was grating on him and I saw his jaw tick.

"I just didn't, Alex, ok?" he said getting a little frustrated, hands clenching around the wheel.

No I wasn't ok. I wanted to know why this was such a sore subject to him. But I said the wrong thing. "Why are you so touchy about it?"

He growled. He actually growled at me. "Back off," he gritted out, knuckles turning white.

"Hey!" I held up my hands. "Calm down, I just thought you might need to talk about it."

Breathing deep through his nose he eventually released the poor steering wheel. "I know I…" He broke off. I watched him as he struggled to put his words together. "Look, I didn't even want to be a wolf in the first place, let alone some big chief of the tribe!"

"But you are," I said, softer now.

"What?"

"Maybe, Jake – and I'm not trying to push or pressure you – but maybe I'm not the only one who's been running?"

Sunset Lanes was the local bowling alley in Forks and it was where Jacob and I had arranged to meet up with some of the pack for an afternoon. It was like your typical American bowling place complete with a dinner attached. It could have been some sort of set for a 1950s movie if the waitresses had roller-skates. I loved it, and I knew if Jenny and Molly were here they would too – Jenny especially.

When we eventually made it to the lane the others had already started so Jake went to get us some milkshakes while we waited the game out. I sat in the seats watching the joking banter bounce around the group and wondered how it was that I felt so at home with people I barely knew. There was something so welcoming about them, like one big chaotic family with aunts, uncles, brothers, sisters, cousins, even fathers and mothers, everyone had their role, everyone fit. They had all grown up together, closer now due to circumstance and secrets, and yet they were still willing to let me into the fold, to embrace me like one of their own.

"You any good?" Embry asked as he took a seat beside me.

I shook my head. "Nah, I'm pretty rubbish. How about you? Looks like you're not doing too bad," I said glancing up at the scoreboard.

He gave a modest shrug. "I'm alright. Don't worry about skill," he advised, "no one is worse than Quil."

Puzzled I peered over at the lane where the boy in question was preparing, eyes on the prize, knees bending in a warm up. I sniggered. "He seems pretty confident."

"Oh sure, now he does," Embry agreed. "Just wait…"

So I waited, watching, wondering what exactly was to come that would throw his game off. Then, just as he strode purposefully forward. Ball tucked into his chest at first before his arm swung back with it ready to release.

"Claire! Leave that loaded gun alone!" I heard Jared call out in alarm.

I spun around to him. Who would bring a gun to a bowling alley? Where was Claire? Was she ok? But all I saw was the little girl slurping noisily on a slushy next to Leah. Embry, chuckling, tapped my shoulder and when I frowned at him he pointed towards the isle. Quil's ball was making its steady route down the gutter. The burly guy was looking like he could quite happily kill Jared. I bit my lip to stop the laughter.

"Quit it already!" he demanded as he made his way back to his seat beside the precious Claire.

"How long have you guys been doing that to him?" I asked.

Embry didn't answer at first, a wicked glint in his eyes. "It's payback."

Payback? I was about to pry into what Quil had done to instigate such revenge but Jake chose that moment to reappear with our drinks. It was Embry's turn so he scooted out the way and up to the lane. Jacob slumped down and silently handed me my milkshake. I eyed him with caution.

"Are you mad at me?" I said.

His face swung around in surprise, big brown eyes. "No! Why would you think that?"

"Because of what I said in the car."

Comprehension dawned and he relaxed. "No, I'm not –" I raised an eyebrow. "Ok, so maybe I am a little. But that's only because you were right."

"I was… what was that word you used?" I teased, nudging his shoulder. "Right? Was it? Was I right?" I expected to feel some self-satisfaction after his admission but I didn't. All I felt was concern that something was bothering him.

"Sure, sure, enjoy it while it lasts."

"I will," I grinned. Then my face dropped. "Come on Jake. Talk to me."

He drew in a deep breath, fingers stirring the straw in the cup around and around in the thick mixture. "You're right, I know you are, and I understand that…"

"But?" I prompted.

"But I'm not ready for it, not yet," he admitted, eyes cast down as if it was some sort of sin.

I leaned over towards him until he looked up in confusion, the expression so adorable that I kissed him soundly on the lips. Pulling back only when Leah taught Claire how to flick slushy at us. "Whenever you're ready," I said, smiling at him, "If you're ready. I'll help." And then I caught those beautiful lips – quickly – one more time in case Paul made good on his threat about throwing a bowling ball at us.

Emily's wedding was beautiful. How could it have been anything else with the abundance of love filling the air? I spent the whole of the day before hand with the others setting everything up. The backyard of Sam and Emily's home had been decorated. The hedges and trees were strung up with colourful paper lantern lights Leah had found in Port Angeles. Pretty, delicate white flowers were draped over the shrubbery and anything else Claire could reach. Three BBQs were positioned near the house with the tables of snacks, salad, fruit, and cake all lined up and ready for the guests. Deck chairs and random seats from other houses (Quil and Paul managed to drag a sofa in from somewhere) were dotted about the garden and a small fire was being built in the centre for warmth later on.

The ceremony was held in the reservation church with close family and friends present. I sat there next to Embry and Seth as the couple exchanged their vows feeling both honoured that I counted and completely out of place – but Emily had insisted, and I think Leah appreciated me being there if her constant eye rolls in my direction were anything to go by.

They looked gorgeous, all of them. Emily in her floaty white dress, hair curled and loose to her waist. Leah and the bridesmaids in light blue summer dresses, flowers woven into their hair. Sam was in his smart suit looking like the luckiest man on earth. Then there was Jacob. Words couldn't begin to describe what I felt when I saw him – and that's probably a good thing because it would be an embarrassing bunch of drivel, no doubt.

I sat in my new beloved silky purple dress and silver, gemmed sandals wondering not for the first or last time how I had gotten there, how I deserved such beautiful people in my life. Surely someone up there was looking out for me, and I smiled, comforted by the thought.

When we all ambled back to the Uley's home other guests had arrived, I think the entire reservation was piled into that one backyard. Jared got the party music playing from the two large speakers positioned on either side of the garden and the food was getting cooked up pretty quickly on the BBQs. I stood to the side for a moment just breathing it all in, all the life that was buzzing around me. I felt that I had been under water for the past 5 years of my life and only now, here, was I braking the surface. Everything was so vibrant, the people, the place, the time, multicoloured and shimmering in all it's glorious simplicity.

Leah came up to stand next to me, handing a plastic cup over. "You ok?"

I turned and gave her a grin. "Never been better. How about you?"

She took a long sip of her drink. "Wonderful."

I nudged her. "Come on, I know a fob off when I hear one!"

"Alright," she sighed, "so I'm not exactly ecstatic, dancing on sunshine, rainbows and gummy bears happy –"

"Have you ever been?"

She scowled. "But I'm ok. I'm trying to be happy that they are happy – you know? Because I love them both, always have, and I think I always will."

I nodded. "Sure, sure. I get it. You have to let go sometime, right?"

Leah didn't answer but I saw her gaze stretch out to where a few couples, and some of the younger guests were twirling around the unlit campfire. Sam held Emily to his chest, cheek pressed to the top of her dark head, eyes closing, a blissful smile growing brighter. It was so heartbreakingly beautiful. I turned away to watch as the tiniest ghost of a smile crept across Leah's face.

"He's not mine," she said softly, "never really was."

"Someone is though," I insisted, but she didn't look mad, or sad, just kind of peaceful.

"Maybe," she rolled her eyes. "You reckon there is anyone out there who can put up with a bitchy werewolf?"

"If I can do it," I puffed my chest out, teasing.

"Yeah, well, you're a freak, so… we'll see. Maybe I don't want anyone. Maybe I'm just going to live my life for me. Maybe I'll have a harem of lovers."

And I could believe it. "You willing to share?"

She chuckled. "Why is Jake not man enough for you?"

I shrugged, "He's alright I suppose."

That made her laugh. "Yeah, whatever, Alex."

I laughed to. She was right, it was stupid to even try and pretend that Jacob wasn't more than enough man for me, the only man for me, but that concept was still a little terrifying.

"You know something?" she said, smirking at me.

"Nope, I know absolutely nothing."

"I really think I'm gonna miss you, Alex Grant."

"Awww, Leah, I'm touched!" I gushed, hands coming up to clasp at my chest. Ignoring the pang in my heart because she had reminded me that in less than a week I would be on a plane home with no idea when I would see these people again – something I was trying to forget.

Her un-lady-like snort was covered by the music changing to a more upbeat tune.

"Wanna dance?" I asked, putting my cup on the grass.

Leah's dark eyes regarded the makeshift dance floor for a moment before she turned with a grin. "Sure."

Claire was the picture of angelic innocence perched on Quil's lap with her curled hair and flowers falling loose. Her big brown eyes glanced up at me kitten like. Then she lifted three cards from the spread Quil held out for her, and with a perfect poker face she said in her two-year-old drawl:

"Three aces." Twee Acees.

My eyes narrowed on that sweetheart face, but nothing gave her away. I had an ace, so it was possible that she had the other three, not likely, but possible. Out the corner of my eye I saw Paul shifting uncomfortably in his seat trying to arrange his great stack of cards into some sort of order. He was a rubbish liar.

I took a chance, not willing to admit that I was still a bit bitter over all the blinking contests I had lost to her. "Cheat!" I called out, fixing her with my best daring stare.

Claire looked around at the table – 'who me?'

Quil chuckled as he reached one long arm out to flip the three top cards over. My heart lifted. Yes! Yes I had beaten her! Ha! Alex 1. Claire 4.

Jacob snorted on my other side as he saw the victory spread across my face. It amused him greatly that I had a rivalry with a 2 year old. Then, as I slumped back smugly in my chair I finally checked the pile in the centre.

Three aces.

No freaking way!

I think my mouth fell open because Jake leaned over and propped it back up again with his index finger as Claire shoved the cards over to me. Leah roared with laughter and was soon joined by the others sat around the table. Grumbling under my breath I collected my losers prize, adding them to my already large spread. I wasn't as bad as Paul, though, so that was a kind of consolation.

We were sat around a fold-out-table playing Cheat because Claire was with us so shouting Bullshit was out of the question. The bonfire had been lit and many of the adults were now gathered around its warm glow with their glasses of wine, or bottles of beer chatting away. Most of the younger guest had been taken home to bed when the sun started to set, and Sam and Emily left for Seattle over an hour ago. All they could afford for their honeymoon was a few days in the city. Though, I didn't think either of them would have cared if they ended up on the back of a pick-up-truck heading to Hoquiam as long as they were together.

Without them the partygoers continued on into the twilight, a relaxed atmosphere settled over everyone. Family is what they all were and I was included in that. I hadn't felt that unconditional love in so long that it was almost like a high.

Jacob leaned over towards me as Seth put down two kings. I shuffled back away from him. "Uh, uh," I waved a finger, "no cheating Mr Black."

He pulled up short with a furrowed brow, and then grinned cheekily at me. "You seem to be losing fine on your own."

I harrumphed and turned my nose up. "I'm leading them into a false sense of security, actually."

"Oh, so that's what you're doing. I was wondering…" He cut off because it was his turn and he laid down a queen.

"Cheat," I said in my most nonchalant voice, staring over at the fire.

Leah's eyes glittered in anticipation. Collin and Seth exchanged amused looks.

"You calling me a cheater, Miss Grant?" Jacob demanded, with fake offence.

"If the shoe fits…" I shrugged.

"I don't wear…" he began but I cut him off.

"Just show me the cards Jacob."

He flipped them reluctantly over and there on the top of the pile was a 5 of hearts. Grinning smugly I raised an eyebrow at him. He shuffled his new cards into his pack and ignored my preening. "False sense of security my ass," he muttered grumpily.

It was my last day in the library and Jacob was coming to pick me up. While I was waiting for my ride Callum came over, catching a stand of books on his way so that they wobbled and everyone in the vicinity held their breath. Luckily his hand shot out to steady it and you could hear the collective relief fill the room. For a mere second I thought I might actually miss this place. Then Enid coughed behind me and scowled darkly when I gave her a bemused look.

"The front desk is not for sitting on Alexandra. Last day or not."

Waiting just long enough for her cheeks to redden in aggravation I eventually slipped down and moved over to lean against the wall. She was going to miss me when I was gone – I could tell.

"Hey!" Callum said when he finally made it over to me. "So today's your last day in this tranquil sanctuary of books, and I've brought you a present."

My eyes lit up. Present? "Really? What is it?"

He shuffled his feet the way he did when he was feeling awkward or embarrassed.

"Come on!" I encouraged. "You can't just tease me with a present and take it away."

"Ok," he sighed. "But it's nothing special I just thought… well, I just thought you might like it, that's all."

I waited. "Seriously Callum, the suspense is going to kill me. I won't unwrap it here if you like?"

That calmed him down somewhat and he reached around to slip his backpack off. Unzipping it swiftly he pulled a long, book-sized rectangle from it covered with pretty blue paper. "Here," he said holding it out. "When you get home."

I nodded soberly, tucking it safely in my bag. "I won't even peek until I'm out of sight." We stood silently for a moment, and then I flung my arms around his neck. "Thank you Callum."

"Hey," he shrugged when I let him go, "you made my summer a whole lot less boring."

"That is true. I do deserve a present!"

"You do," he agreed.

It was strange the way that from the very first moment we met on the beach I could sense Jacob's presence when he was near to me. Spinning around I grinned at him. "I got a prezzie!"

Jake didn't look all that happy but he nodded as he walked over, eyes flickering to Callum and back to me. "So I see."

O… kay. "Uh. Right. This is Callum," I gestured to the green-eyed boy to my left. "Callum, this is Jacob."

"Hey," Callum greeted stretching out his hand.

Jacob took it, and judging by the wince on Callum's face he squeezed it. "Hey."

The tension was thick as custard. It was thicker than that, thick as cement maybe, or soil, or something really really thick. "So…" I fumbled for a subject to ease the mounting unease. "Right, thanks again for the gift Callum. It was really kind of fun working with you. Don't let the bastards beat you down!"

"I won't. Good luck with everything," he smiled. Jacob's jaw twitched.

"Bye!" I said as I strolled out the door with the hope that the big burly wolf would follow. Out in the fresh air I rounded on Jake. "What the hell was all that about?" I was not a possession and was not going to be treated as one.

"I was going to ask you the same question!"

I came up short. "What?"

His fists were clenched and he looked pretty well on his way to furious. "I come to pick you up from work only to find you cuddling up to some guy who gives you presents! What am I supposed to think?"

"You are totally right," I snapped at him. "Callum and me have been having sordid affair this whole time. I mean that's the sort of sluttish thing I would do right?"

He was instantly repentant. "No, I did mean…"

I glared back at him and cut through his excuse. "You want to know what you are supposed to think, Jacob? I don't know. Maybe you're supposed to think that its nice Alex has friends. Maybe you're supposed to trust me enough for it to not be an issue."

"Alex, I'm sorry I shouldn't have…" he reached out towards me desperate for my touch, reassurance, his anger now a distant memory.

Mine was still fresh and flaming. "No, you shouldn't have," I agreed trying to rein in my temper. "But you did. Jake, I thought you understood that you mean more to me than anyone ever has, and probably ever will. And while that concept might scare the shit out of me most mornings I'm dealing with it, because I care about you and I want this – with you. If I wanted Callum I would go get Callum. I don't." His eyes were burning into me, smouldering with remorse. "Look. The thing is that I'm never going to be the kind of girl who when her boyfriend calls she drops everything and goes running. I'm independent and I intend to stay that way. Your opinion means so so much to me, but I will never stop being friends with someone I like just because you can't handle it. Got it?"

He nodded. "Got it."

I let out a breath. "Ok." My eyes narrowed on him. "You're a complete jerk."

"I deserve that."

"Yes you do." I pulled myself together again. "So it's my last day tomorrow and I don't want to argue anymore."

"Me either," he whispered with such sincerity that I couldn't help but forgive him a tiny bit – not that I was going to let him know that just yet.

"Alright then!" I clapped my hands together briskly trying to chase the dark clouds away from our afternoon. "If we're both in agreement? Lets get going!"

But he didn't move and I stared at him wondering what the problem was now. In one stride he made it to stand in front of me. A hand cupped my chin to tilt my face up to his. Our lips met, eyes shut, and hearts raced. The kiss was soft, tender, apologetic and I melted into it, into him, even as we stood on the sidewalk and curious or just plain embarrassed shoppers dodged around us. When he pulled back he wrapped me into his big arms, mouth resting by my ear. "I'm so sorry, Alex."

"That's ok." I muttered finding it increasingly hard to be even mildly mad at him anymore. "But do it again and you wont be fathering children."

I could sense the wolfish grin that crept up over his face then. So, I wasn't completely surprised when in one smooth movement he hoisted me onto his shoulder and set off down the street. I spent all of two seconds thumping my fist ineffectually against his back before I gave up.

"Enjoying the view?" I grumbled, cheeks hot from the stares we were getting.

"Yep," the smug git replied and jostled me so that I grabbed at his shirt to maintain my balance – not that I thought he would let me fall.

"Oh my god you are such a jerk today!"

He laughed.

The hallway of Diana's home wasn't particularly long. In fact, it took exactly seven medium sized strides to get from the kitchen to the front door. Or, in Jacob's freakish case, four steps. Yet, as I stood hesitating in the doorway of the kitchen the front door seemed miles away.

In the garden I could here my aunt chatting over the fence to her neighbour. Their voices were a hazy background noise to the thud of my heart and the nervous prickling of my palms. I was beginning to sweat. Maybe I had been wrong; maybe I did need Jacob here right now. Moral support wasn't something to be ashamed of. Needing to borrow someone else's strength for a while, that wasn't weak or wrong, right?

When the boisterous laugh of Mr Dunstall next-door bounced around the kitchen tiles I took a sudden step forward. What was the damned man laughing about so loudly? Diana wasn't funny… at all… ever.

Now I was actually in the hallway I managed to get my legs to move in an oddly disjointed walk down towards the table where the phone sat. No, I didn't have Telephonophobia. It was the person that would be on the end of the receiver that I feared. Feared was a strong word – dreaded would be more appropriate.

I dreaded the call I was about to make, but I knew it had to be done so I took a deep breath and reached out to lift the handset. The number was dialled before I had more time to back out like the cowardly lion I was.

It seemed to ring forever, the sound echoing across the ocean. I imagined that familiar silver phone, in that familiar beige hallway, in that familiar house built of flint, and the familiar voices yelling for someone to answer it.

Eventually, by the time I had decided that no one was going to pick it up, someone did, and I jumped at the click.

"Hello?" said the voice sweetly and my heart jolted.

"Livi?" I asked, though I knew it was my little sister. "Does mum know you're picking up the phone now?"

"Alex?" She was puzzled. "You've got a funny voice."

I must have picked up a bit of an American twang without realising it. "Yeah, it's me. How are you?"

"Mmmm-good." She replied, overwhelming me with information. "Baked chocolate biscuits today."

"That's great!" I enthused – probably a little too strongly, but it was suddenly so unbelievably good to hear her. "I got your get-well card. Did you and Tilly do it yourselves?"

There was a big breath. "Yes – well, no, not really. Mummy did it but we chose the pictures and typed our names. Even Georgie did too!"

"He's going to be a real geek someday. Thank you so much, Liv. I loved it. Hey, um, is mum there now?"

"Uh huh."

"Can I speak with her please?"

She turned from the receiver and I heard her yell 'Mummy!' through the house. When she came back she said: "Mummy's in the garden so she's washing her hands. You going to call again?"

"Probably not because I'll be home soon."

"Kay," pause, "Miss you."

"Me too." I felt my heart squeeze tight in my chest. "Hey, I got you presents!"

"Really?"

"Yep."

"Yay! Hey, Mum, Alex got me a present!"

I tensed as I heard my mother's voice rumble back an answer and then Livi was saying goodbye as the handset switched hands noisily. "Alex?"

One deep breath in. "Hey Mum."

She sounded confused and a little concerned. "Is something the matter?"

"No!" I hurried to assure her. "No, not exactly. Well, yeah, there is… I'm coming home in a few days and… I think we need to talk."

"Talk?"

"Yes," I continued, desperately shutting off the part of my brain that wanted to cut and run. That wasn't me anymore. "About everything." Breathe. "Dad, me, you, and what happened."

"Alex…" she sounded wary, she didn't think it was a good idea. Like I was suggesting that George go play in a shark tank this could only end badly. Finally she let out a breath of air that crackled down the wires. "Ok… ok, we'll talk when you get back."

"Really talk," I clarified, "not just ghost around what we want to say. Get it all out in the open so we can deal with it and not hide from it any-longer."

"Alex? What's going on? Is everything ok? Are you ok?"

I shouldn't have found it funny but I kind of did. "Never been better, Mum."