DODGING THE BULLET
A TOTAL DRAMA ISLAND STORY
A/N: I sure hope you enjoy fluff, cause there's a lot in this chapter. It's basically my version of the time when Bella and Edward went to that meadow in the woods, only this is on Mount Shasta. And the first kiss, possibly. I have to see how it goes. Also, since APDubb said they were getting a bit OOC (note: I'm not mad, I like helpful reviews), I hope that Courtney and Duncan seem a bit more in character this chapter.
Songs for this chapter:
Skinny Dipping, by The Plain White T's
Honey, This Mirror Isn't Big Enough for the Two of Us, by My Chemical Romance
Your Call, by Secondhand Serenade
Give Me a Chance, by The Plain White T's
Viva La Vida, by Coldplay
Love Remains the Same, by Gavin Rossdale
Well, this chapter's pretty much going to blow, so hold on for the long run. Like, I mean it.
(I'm so tired but I refuse to go to sleep—it took a few tries to spell 'Chemical'. I mean, Chemucak? You guys must be so envious.)
Oh, and SORRY FOR THE LATE UPDATE!! I'm not allowed on the computer on weekdays, so most likely I'll update on Fridays/weekends, and I'll write new chapters on Sunday…
CHICAGO718
--
CHAPTER SEVEN: CLOSE ENOUGH
--
Courtney woke up suddenly, feeling the gentle, rhythmic pattern of rain against her window. She had fallen asleep on Duncan's sweatshirt, folded like a pillow; her sense of smell was temporarily permeated with mint. She liked it, more than she should have.
No, she told herself strictly. He's off-limits. He even said so. Too dangerous. Besides, there are so many pretty girls at Pasquada High. Heather, or Lindsay for example.
That reassured her. They were friends, Duncan and her. That much was clear. He had saved her, twice. The very instance was bound to bring some sort of mutual bond between two people, the victim and the savior, a sort of forced relationship that was in retaliation to keeping someone alive. It meant not a thing.
Courtney still couldn't help but remember the primal, envious look that had crossed Duncan's face when Justin had been touching her. It was a situation Courtney wasn't accustomed to. Sure, she wasn't bad looking, pretty by many standards, but nothing compared the impeccable, polished beauty of Lindsay, or even Bridgette. It was strange, being the object of affection of two, and by no means bad-looking, guys. Well, three, if you counted Cody, but he was more like a hanger-on--not an option. Not that if he was she would choose him.
Then there was that thing about Duncan's eyes, the scorching force of their intimidating, haunting blue. That time when he had looked at her in the car, it was a moment that was pretty much engrained in her mind.
She breathed in deeply: thinking about him was making her breathing become shallow and jagged.
Oh, no, she thought. I don't like him. We're FRIENDS, and not even because I want us to be! He saved me! That's bound to cause something! He's just an ignorant jerk, and a pig, not to mention. Remember that time when he tried to get Heather…
Ugh.
What the hell. I'm serious. I even admitted to myself I was nearly in love with him last time I saw him. What is wrong with me? He's just some…guy who happened to save my life…numerous times…
And once again, ugh. She couldn't even realize that she was herself; she was in a different body or something. Not in a million years would her old self gone all over a guy because he…saved her life…
Had he had to do that? If he hadn't saved her, she wouldn't feel like she was in debt to him.
Courtney assumed Mount Shasta was still on, he had said 'anytime', even if he had said previously he wasn't so sure. She felt stupid to herself, like it wasn't her, in a different skin. Even she had said to herself she didn't like him. She didn't want him. It was he who had suggested the idea. She remembered what she had said yesterday about seeing him the next day, which was today, Mount Shasta day. She felt stupid. Of course she would have seen him. He had probably been smirking all the way home.
She bid goodbye to her mom as she left for work, and sat, waiting anxiously on the steps. She nearly jumped out of her skin when the doorbell rang.
She got up, tugging her striped gray tank top further down on her hips, touching the ribbon in her hair, and opened the door.
Duncan was leaning against the doorframe, casual as ever in a black jacket with a silver lightning streak down the center, and jeans.
"Hi," Courtney said. She was momentarily dazed by his pale skin on the minimal light of the dark sky.
"You ready?" he asked, registering her.
"Um, yeah," she said nervously. A good few hours alone with Duncan. It would be interesting, that's for sure.
He held the door open for her, like a gentleman. She had to make sure not to get any part of her stuck in the door. Luckily, she didn't. The jeans made it impossible for her to pull her legs up to her chest, so she settled for resting her elbow against the leather jutting out beneath her window and resting her head on it, drumming her fingertips against her chin.
"Remember what I said about me not being safe?" he asked aloud, suddenly, breaking the silence.
"Mm-hmm," Courtney muttered, not wanting to bring it up, again.
"I was telling the truth."
"I know," she answered.
"After this whole thing I don't think we should do this anymore," he said, pressing the button to stop the song 'Viva La Vida' coming from the radio.
Courtney didn't answer.
"I don't want anything bad to happen to you," he said proprietarily. "I'm kind of a magnet for trouble."
"But you saved me," Courtney couldn't help but bring up. She downcast her eyes to her seat. "That's twice now."
He smirked slightly. "Let's not try for a third, okay?"
Courtney frowned. "What do you mean by magnet for trouble?"
He looked at her; a swiftly passing glance like it had been done by accident. "Well, Trent got on the wrong side of this guy, Derrick, a few years ago. He and his, uh…'gang'—" He drew the quotations in the air — "Well, they associate Trent with me and Geoff, so they're kind of, um, 'after us'."
"After you?"
"Uh, yeah, they pretty much stalk us," he laughed.
"Aren't you worried?" Courtney asked, biting her nails out of habit.
"Not really." He said it coolly, like being stalked by a bunch of psycho, revenge-crazy teenagers was no big deal.
Courtney tried to digest that. Well, apparently Duncan was stronger than her, at least in that regard.
"Are we there yet?" she asked after a few more minutes. It sounded juvenile as soon as it came out.
"Few minutes," he assured her.
She tapped her heel against the seat. She was getting nervous, for no reason. Gosh. It was just friends going to somewhere together. As friends. Sheesh, she needed to relax. Nonetheless, even as she chanted 'friends' in her head numerous times, her palms started to grow cold. She clenched them into fists, pressing them hard against her ankles, feeling her knuckles press into her bone.
If Duncan noticed he decided not to comment. Still there was a knowing smirk on his face as he eyed her tensed hands.
He pulled up next to a tree and put it in park. Courtney stared at the tree in front of him.
"Hey, is that legal?" she asked cautiously.
He smirked. "Babe, I do illegal things all the time. Don't worry about it."
She didn't doubt it. Getting out of the car, she slammed the door and stared at the vast mountain. It wasn't exactly pretty, it was sharp and craggy and a rather dull shade of gray. But it was really tall and the sky behind it was pink with the rising sun. She smiled to herself, but added, "Don't call me babe."
"Whatever, sunshine," he said sarcastically. "Now get going, I don't have all day."
"Don't you?" she asked.
"No, I have a life," he said, but there was a half-smile on his face. So he was joking.
She was glad she had worn tennis shoes. There were a few trees haphazardly planted in clumps around the mountain. She wasn't breathless; she paced herself carefully, making sure not to look at Duncan. She could hear him, nearly-silent, behind her, and she could feel the force of his gaze on her back. She felt so…so exposed. She wished she had worn more than a tank top. Self-consciously, she pulled her shirt past her jeans' pocket.
"Hey, stop," he said behind her. She did. "We're here."
Courtney looked ahead. All she saw was trees.
"No, over there," he said, putting a finger under her chin, and turning her head in the direction. Her heart beat out-of-time in her chest.
Friends, she reminded herself.
He had directed to her a rocky ledge jutting about twenty feet out, far, far from the ground. Funny, she had thought the distance was so much shorter.
"T-there?" she asked. Oh my God, she thought. We're so…high.
"There," he finalized. "Why? Scared?"
"No," she defended quickly. "It's just we're so…uh…high."
"Don't be stupid," he scoffed. "I drove you all the way here. You're seeing what I want you to see."
Then, without her consent, he picked her up bridal-style and started walking.
"Put me down!" she shouted, kicking and attempting to pound on his chest.
He grinned and put her down on the ledge. She looked down and backed away. "I hate it when you do that."
"Get used to it, darling," he said.
She blushed. What did that mean?
Now that she was up, she did realize California looked really incredible from a distance: the blue ocean lapping on the edges of a white strip of sand, the surf shacks and houses specks from such a height, rolling green hills and neat green palm trees lining black bars of road.
"Nice," she commented. That didn't even begin to describe it. The orange circle of sun was perfectly halved out of sight and peeking from behind the ocean in her view, making everything glow. She thought she had seen something like this in a commercial.
"Yeah," he replied offhandedly. But he wasn't looking at California. He was looking at her.
"I meant the view," she clarified, her cheeks going red.
He didn't say anything. She bit her lip and turned back over to the sky. It was becoming blue again, fading to white as it reached higher, tipping and arcing over her head. It was overwhelming. She didn't realize how close to the sky she was, or how far away she was when she was on the ground.
"See what I meant when I said I wanted you to say this?" he piped up.
"Hmm," she said, letting out her usual sound when she was thinking. It was weird, being this high up with so much air and space. It was marring her sense of thought. She felt a little drunk with so much space and freedom. How come the ground wasn't like this?
"Are you okay, princess?" Duncan asked, eyeing her warily. She realized she had gone a bit glaze-eyed.
"Oh, yeah, fine," she said hastily, wishing the blood would stop rushing to her face. She could practically feel it rushing through her veins to her cheeks.
It's just Duncan, she said to herself. Get a grip, Court.
Just Duncan? Somehow those two words didn't sound right together.
She stared at the dark rock beneath her, examining how her shoes moved as she wiggled her toes.
After a while, after Duncan hadn't said anything, she turned around, and was surprised that her face was only a foot away from Duncan's chest. She looked up. He wasn't looking at her, thought his knee was touching the back of her leg, and his hand was uncomfortably close to her waist, kind of like he was itching to hold her hips in his hands. She was surprised by how much this bothered/elated her. She inched away, scared about what was to come.
He looked slightly disappointed, but he said nothing, only backed up to the end of the ledge and leaned against the rocks, staring at her back and putting one foot against the mountain; hands in his pockets.
"Can I ask you something?" she asked him after staring at the waves lap at shore for a few minutes.
"Depends," he said seriously.
"Do you like Heather?" she asked, feeling stupid. What? Now she was pretending to own him, too?
He looked actually sober as he pondered. "Guess not."
"What about Lindsay?" Courtney couldn't help adding.
"Nope," he said, popping the 'p'.
"Anyone?" she asked, half-hopefully.
"One person," he said.
"Oh." She decided not to probe any further. It wasn't her, for sure. It was none of her business anyway.
She checked her watch, and was surprised that four hours had passed, and they hadn't said more than a few words to each other. She hadn't embarrassed herself too much, thankfully, like tripping over her own feet.
"Oh, shoot," she muttered after a minute, turning around and bounding down the mountain, taking the rocks two at a time and trying not to slip.
"What's wrong?" he asked, following her.
"I completely forgot, I have to be home by two," she explained, still walking. "I have this thing; my mom has this speech she likes to recite over the phone to me about achievement and high standards. It's really important to her."
She could almost hear him roll his eyes. "You lead an exciting life."
"Hey, it's not like I like it," Courtney complained. "She's really—ouch."
So much for not tripping over her own feet. She had dislodged her shoe in a pebble and fell down, luckily not face-first, at least her legs were still behind her feet.
"What a klutz," Duncan smirked, extending a hand to help her up. She put her shoe back on and blushed.
"Gee, thanks," she muttered, hopping up and not taking his hand.
That's when she realized how disturbingly close her face was from his. And it's not like he was backing away. She was frozen in place, the weirdly magnetic force of his eyes keeping her there. Curse her nonexistent willpower. He had that primal look again, staring at her closely as if trying to figure out something his eyes couldn't see.
In one sudden movement, his arms were on her waist, and he was kissing her neck, his hand traveling down her leg like he couldn't get enough of her at once. Then his lips went to hers, moving against them, his tongue forcing entrance. Courtney's lips automatically started moving as well out of instinct.
She was surprised by the force of his wanting; his mouth on hers was hungry and fierce, his rough lips demanding her response.
It felt so good and bad at the same time. It was wrong but she wanted more. It was wrong and she was a good girl. It was just wrong.
She shut her eyes, tight. She had no idea if this was just part of his hormonal nature, or if this was out of feeling. She wouldn't take a chance, or by any means, let him screw around. So she did what her mind (but not her heart) told her to do. She pushed him away.
He looked surprised, but he kept his cool and crossed his arms over his chest.
"Sorry," Courtney said, turning away and walking further down the mountain so that now Duncan's car was in view.
She really had no idea why she'd done that. Maybe it was her pride.
"Babe, it's your pride," Duncan said from behind her. "You'll come around."
"Pig," she replied, reaching the tree that his car was parked. She got in, regretting the moment that she had pushed him away.
"I'll never understand chicks," Duncan muttered, getting in on the driver's side and closing the door behind him.
"I won't come around," Courtney said firmly.
He looked at her, half a smile visible on his face. "Darling, you kissed me back."
She frowned. "You were forcing it."
"Sure," he said skeptically. The road passed for a while. Nothing seemed as amazing from where they were at.
"How many nicknames do you have for me anyway?" Courtney remarked bitterly.
"Count: darling, sweetheart, babe, sunshine, princess…"
"Shut up." She crossed her arms tightly over her chest, rubbing her bare shoulders. She wished that the ride home was shorter, but she also wished he would kiss her again. She was confused about what exactly she wanted. What did she want?
She turned on the radio and listened as the song came on:
Half the time the world is ending
The truth is I am done pretending
I, never thought that I, had anymore to give
Pushing me so far
Here I am without you
Drink to all that we have lost
Mistakes we have made
Everything will change
But love remains the same
She muttered, 'shit', under her breath and turned the radio off. Duncan smirked.
"You know, some people would call that fate," he said.
"Others would call it a coincidence," she glared.
"Believe what you want, sweetheart." He opened the car door and then walked around to open hers. "We're here."
It was only after his car was out of sight that the full force of the situation hit her.
They had kissed. They had kissed. They had kissed.
What did that make them? He had kissed her. Thus, that didn't mean she necessarily wanted what kissing usually meant. Love.
Duncan? In love? With her? That was logical. Not.
A/N: Well, I liked the actual kiss, I didn't like the chapter. It moved to fast. They spent way too little town on the actual mountain. Oh well. Enjoy.