Chapter 3

John left Rodney's lab deep in thought and headed for his next port of call in the morning ritual. Ronon and he regularly sparred at this time of the day, when they were not off-world. He was finally getting better, and could beat most of the marines, but had rarely got the better of Ronon. Unlike Rodney, Ronon was a man of action not words, so it was with some surprise that he caught him sitting down, struggling with what looked like wrapping paper and ribbon.

'Oh, god, not you too, Ronon? Is there no-one in this city not obsessing about tomorrow? Who's the lucky lady...or gentleman?'

Looking a little sheepish, Ronon pushed the untidy mess to one side and turned to look at John. He knew he owed this man much and considered him a brother, more than friend. When he had received Rodney's message a few minutes ago, he had to quickly decide what to do, but talking 'feelings' with another man was not something he felt at all comfortable with.

'Lieutenant Banks. You know, the kick boxing technician. Things have been hotting up there.'

'Oh, right,' John grinned awkwardly, 'I'm very pleased for you. When can I congratulate you?'

'Yeah, well, lust and sex is where we're at, but it might develop'. John smiled at Ronon's directness. It was something he admired greatly about the man. 'So, what are you doing tomorrow?' Ronon continued, ignoring the angry look that crossed John's face.

'You know what, I think I'll skip the whole being beaten black and blue thing this morning. I am a busy man and I have work to do.' John made to leave, but was held back by a large hand on his arm.

'Look, John. If you love her, you need to tell her. If you want to be with her, you have to tell her. It's simple. Bite the bullet or call it off and move on.'

'Everybody's a relationship expert today,' John replied sarcastically. Ronon released him and watched sadly as John stalked out of the room. He had a nasty feeling that that hadn't gone as well as he had hoped.

****

Cat had spent the day engrossed in preparations, putting aside all her worries and doubts. She had hoped to come across John at lunchtime, but he was nowhere to be seen. Instead, she satisfied herself with wrapping his present and making sure the table and chairs were hidden at the pier, then buried herself in her work for the afternoon. The task of cataloguing all the objects collected from the beginning of the expedition was huge and she had yet to be given an assistant to help. However, it was the most interesting job she had ever had and she loved every minute of it. She tried to put aside all her earlier fears and had just about managed to forget them by the evening.

Again, at dinner John was not around. She buzzed Chuck, thinking he might have gone off-world, but he hadn't, so she just assumed that something urgent had come up following his meeting with Woolsey that morning. She didn't even worry when he hadn't come to bed by midnight, quite used to his late nights and early mornings spent with his friends. She certainly didn't begrudge him this time, comforted in the knowledge that he would crawl into bed with her sometime before daylight. When she finally drifted off to sleep at about 3a.m., she still was not overly concerned.

Cat woke up with a start. The first thing she noticed was that her back was cold, then that the golden light of the Atlantis morning was streaming through her window. The usual dent in the mattress beside her was absent too. John had not come to bed last night. This was the first time, apart from late nights back from missions, or nights spent away from Atlantis, that she hadn't woken up next to him. As morning consciousness properly stirred, she also remembered that it was Valentine's Day and the uneasiness that she had managed to dispel the previous day began to grow again.

'Don't panic, girl,' she told herself, 'there's bound to be a sensible explanation.' She slipped on her jogging pants and top and headed off down the corridor to Ronon's room. He took some time to answer his door and looked somewhat flustered and she belatedly realised that Amelia Banks was probably with him.

'I'm sorry, Ronon. Didn't mean to disturb you. Was John with you last night? Have you seen him?'

Ronon frowned. No, he said, he hadn't seen him since yesterday morning. Had she tried Rodney? He was sure there was a simple explanation.

It wasn't until Cat was about to knock on Rodney and Katie's door that she remembered what the day was and why they might not want to see her right then. Embarrassed, and determined to apologise to Ronon and Amelia later, she had another thought and ran towards John's quarters. Surely, he wouldn't be here? Why would he? It took a while for the door to open, but the dishevelled hair appeared first, followed by a rather tired looking John Sheppard.

'Oh!' she stuttered, 'I really didn't expect you to be here. I was worried. You didn't come home last night. Is anything the matter?'

'I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be? We're not welded together at the hip, you know, and these are my quarters,' he snapped. He instantly regretted the sharpness of his tone as he met her eyes. The shock registered first, followed by pain, then anger. He wanted to reach out for her and tell her he was sorry, but she simply turned her back and walked away before he could. Following her with his eyes, he sighed deeply. 'Well, perhaps it's for the best;' he thought. Only he suspected that however often he told himself this, he wouldn't believe it.

Cat held onto her tears until she reached their, no her room, where she broke down and sobbed uncontrollably. How could he do this to them? To her? All the dread that she had been feeling crashed down around her and for a while she lost the control that she usually prided herself in. Cat wasn't one for dwelling too long and finally she managed to stop crying. Okay. How to solve this problem? She was tempted to let him make the next move, but knowing John that would never happen. Swallowing her pride, she decided that attack was the best form of defence. She opened her laptop and sent him the e-mail invitation for their romantic dinner for two that she had so carefully crafted the day before. If he came, then she would know that they were alright. If he didn't, well she couldn't even go there. She would even tell herself that it was okay for him not to say he loved her, as long as she could be with him.

To Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard.

From Doctor Catherine Adams

You are cordially invited to dinner for two tonight at the newly opened Atlantis restaurant on the east pier. Dress optional. 7:30pm.

TBC