Growing Up

By Sarga

Written June to November 2008

Posted November 14, 2008

Description: Naraku defeated, Kagome realizes that half-demon Inuyasha will always remain the boy she met, timelessly unageing. Kagome must choose between letting him go and staying by his side. Can he forgive her if she goes? Can she forgive herself if she stays?

Chapter 3 – Forgiveness

Veiled in white cloth, the bride stood tall as she walked down the isle. Flowers in hand, she took the trek at the arm of her mother, head held high. Today was the day she would marry the man she had come to love like no other!

Kagome stood at the head of the isle, her pale blue bridesmaid dress matching those of Yuka and Ayumi as they watched their friend Eri walk toward them. The sandy-haired English groom had his eyes intently fixed on the bride as she drew closer to joining him in a union to last a lifetime.

Blanking out the actual words of the holy man at the front of the church, Kagome tried to stifle the yawn that threatened to surface. Focusing her thoughts on anything other than the recitations going on in front of her – the source of her need to keep yawning – she thought of the past five years of her life since she had emerged from the well and sealed it behind her for good. In that time Kagome had taken over more and more of her grandfather's shrine duties, allowing the old man enough work to be and feel useful while keeping things up to par for visitors attending the shrine. She had gone to evening classes at a local community college to earn a diploma in financial record keeping but other than a part-time job at a local convenience store, she kept to herself. Her friends blamed her distance on her earlier illnesses, she blamed it on the need to keep herself distracted – if she thought about it at all.

Pulled out of her internal reflection, Kagome caught herself just in time not to appear shaken (smile for the camera). As the groom kissed the bride, the members of the audience stood and clapped, one of the younger men – a friend of the groom, another Englishman – whistled and hooted, drawing chuckles from the friends around him.

Following the other members of the bridal party back down the isle, Kagome stuck to Ayumi's side – her ride to the reception – and stayed out of the way as much as she could.

"That was such a beautiful service," sniffled Ayumi, drawing a tissue from her bra-line to dab at her eyes before returning it to its place.

"Yeah," Kagome didn't have to fake her smile, she was truly happy for her friend. Eri deserved to be cared for – they all did – and it really was a beautiful thing that had happened... so why was Kagome so disinterested?

"Ayumi!" a trendy woman called to the bridesmaid through the crowd.

"There's my sister. She must have the car out front. I'd drive but... open bar." Ayumi shrugged. At least she was being responsible before she got plastered

Shuffling patiently in the crowd toward the exit, the two women waited their turn to wink at and congratulate the new couple before they headed to the reception hall early for pictures.

Ayumi's sister was pleasant but rushed, her motherly duties to two young children stretching her thinner than she had perhaps hoped. Kissing her sister lightly on the cheek, she gently chided her not to get too rowdy, knowing full well her sister would probably be going home with her boyfriend of several months, Chiro Tanaka.

Heading into the hotel banquet hall, Kagome and Ayumi found they were not the first to arrive. Individual pictures of the bridesmaids and grooms-men had already commenced and Kagome sighed in dismay as she waited for her turn to be immortalized on film.

It was going to be a long evening...

. . . . . . . . . .

Kagome swirled her third glass of wine – this one almost as empty as her previous two – and sighed for the umpteenth time as she sat alone at her table near the head of the room. She watched the nearby dance floor filled with people who were writhing to the music, the free alcohol loosening everyone's inhibitions until they were all great friends, even those who had never met before.

"Hi."

The voice was unexpected and nearly made Kagome spill her wine with surprise. The owner was an unassuming young man in his twenties – a little younger than her but not by much – with average black hair and dark eyes. His voice was foreign and his face unknown to her.

"Hi," Kagome responded, not knowing who the person was but not wanting to be too impolite – it was a celebration after all.

"I've been told you don't know anyone around here – that I might do some good by introducing you around." The young man stuck out his hand and Kagome gingerly took it. Whoever he was, he was sorely mistaken, but it couldn't hurt to figure out why. "I'm Kohaku, and you must be Koharu?"

Kagome almost cringed at the name of the man in front of her, a sharp reminder of her friends long gone, and it took her a moment more to register the case of mistaken identity. Koharu was Eri's younger sister who had suddenly taken ill. She was from out of town and would have been here with the other bridesmaids if it hadn't been for that.

"I'm afraid you have the wrong person, Kohaku. I'm Kagome," she clarified with a smile and he blushed in slight embarrassment.

"Oh, I thought... You were here by yourself and she wasn't supposed to know anyone... and I saw you here alone..." Kohaku was tripping up over his words, obviously not comfortable with the change of scenario.

"It's okay, really. Koharu's sick, so I've been told, and couldn't make it. Guess you're stuck with me, ne?"

The young man seemed put at ease once more, Kagome's confident nature reassuring him.

"Would you like to dance, Kagome?" Kohaku asked suddenly, his ulterior motive laid on the line.

Kagome smiled sweetly, the effects of three full glasses of wine impacting her normally reserved self.

"Sure, Kohaku, I'd love to."

Following him out to the dance floor, Kagome began to sway with the music, her eyes closing of their own accord as she let her fuzzy thoughts flow out of her head to the rhythmic beat. She let herself go, forgetting about her partner, the other dancers, heck, even herself. The only thing in the world was the music.

Kagome panted lightly as she followed Kohaku back to the bar for a refresher after a half a dozen songs. They chatted amiably and she found out that he was in his second year at Tokyo University and was studying manufacturing design. He had secured a part-time job doing grunt work at a local company that produced small collectables like key-chains and cell-phone attachments – and wasn't that a coincidence? It was just down the road from where Kagome worked two days a week at a convenience store!

"Maybe we should get lunch together some time?" Kohaku suggested, his ease with Kagome much more visible now that they had spent the evening dancing and chatting away. "I know a nice diner that has quick service and great oden."

"That one with the waitress with the big hair? Ami... or Meiko... something like that?"

Kohaku nodded, grinning from ear to ear.

"I'm working on Wednesday. How about I meet you there at noon?" Kagome smiled herself, trying to get the alcohol-induced fuzzy feeling out of her brain.

"Great! It's a date!" Kohaku waved goodbye at a stunned Kagome as she registered that he thought... Oh no! This would be like Houjo all over again... Her happiness suddenly frozen, Kagome took a deep breath to calm herself. She knew it would happen eventually – she didn't want to end up an old woman all alone with a million cats, after all – but she had been hoping to move at her own pace.

Five years hadn't been long enough to cure her heartache. Even as she tried to make excuses a hidden piece of her soul hoped it would take an eternity.

. . . . . . . . . .

Three lunch-dates later Kagome agreed to let him cook dinner for her. There was 'no pressure' as he put it, his roommate would be home the entire time – yet Kagome still felt nervous. She didn't like him that way, and wasn't sure she ever would. There was something about him that was just... missing. It wasn't his fault, really, he had a lot to live up to – which was why she was standing outside his door, her hand held uncertainly, unsure whether or not to knock.

Their dates had been amiable, their chatter ranging from their favourite type of oden to where they went to high school. Kagome had been startled to find that he had graduated from her high school only two years earlier and that he had headed straight to university. She had assumed that, like her, he had spent some time out of school first.

It turned out that Kohaku was a whole seven years younger than Kagome and yet he thought she was his age. The realization startled her. It wasn't the first time someone had thought her to be younger than she was but it was getting too common to be just a complement on her youthful looks. Here she was twenty-seven and people mistook her for a twenty-year-old – she still got ID'ed at every bar she went to!

Even as the thoughts troubled her, Kagome pushed it to the side. She was here for good food and good company. That she was still a youthful and attractive woman was a good thing!

Resolved, Kagome knocked on Kohaku's door, taking a deep breath to steady her nerves for her first date with him in private. He was a nice, responsible, quiet man, just like she needed – what did she have to complain about?

Kohaku greeted Kagome with a warm hug, pulling her into the apartment for the 'grand tour'. Past the coat rack and to the left was the kitchen, smells of pungent spices wafting plesantly from the closed lids of the pots on the stove. The table was set with a romantic-looking red rose, a pair of unlit red candles on either side waiting for attention. Past the kitchen was the living room, the empty sofa facing a modest television set, the glass coffee table strewn with several well-used text books.

"Over to your right are the bedrooms. My roommate is in his room right now, busy studying for exams."

"Oh, should I..." Kagome looked to the books on the table, remembering his own classes. "Should we reschedule? I wouldn't want to distract you."

Kohaku waved off her concerns with a smile. "No need, I finished my exams earlier this week, he's got a few different courses so his are a little later." Turning her attention back toward the entryway, he pointed out the bathroom.

"That's it! It's not much, but it does for what we need." Kohaku shrugged modestly. "Dinner's ready, I just left it on the stove to stay warm. Come, sit down."

Kohaku headed back to the kitchen and Kagome sat in the chair he dutifully held out for her. Sitting daintily, she watched watched as he smoothly brought over the pan and lifted out the fish fillet with a spatula, laying one on her plate, and the other on his own. Next was the rice, flecked with green and black – probably wild rice and seasoning – and finally a creamy sauce.

Sitting himself across from Kagome, Kohaku lit the candles with a small lighter and gave her a soft smile.

Kagome felt a nervous tingling in the base of her abdomen, but swallowed it down, forcing it back with a steely resolve. She would give him a chance, the chance she hadn't given Houjo because of Inuyasha... Kagome sent her own timid smile back and watched as his own grew wider, more confident.

"How was your week, Kagome?"

Kagome answered pleasantly, her words enthralling Kohaku despite their mundane topic. As the dinner wore on, Kagome felt the nervous tingling in her belly turn from mere nerves to outright unpleasantness and no matter how she tried to ignore it, it just kept getting stronger.

Behind her, Kagome heard the door to one of the bedrooms open and the sound of footsteps.

"Sorry for the interruption, man. I got a friend coming over."

Kagome was rigid with shock, her eyes wide as saucers as she heard the sound of a familiar voice she had thought lost to time. Nearly knocking the chair over in her sudden effort to see for herself if he really was who he sounded like, Kagome whirled around.

"Kagome, this is my roommate..." Kohaku was a little startled by her sudden and violent reaction, but he maintained a pleasant tone.

"Kouga?" Kagome's voice, barely a whisper, caught the man's attention immediately. Pivoting on his heel, he faced her with a penetrating gaze. Faster than she could see, she was pinned by the neck against the kitchen wall, clawing at his hand as it held her firmly in place, threatening to crush her under its firm grip.

"What are you...?" the man leaned in, his eyes narrowing dangerously as his lip curled up in a sneer. "...and how do you know my father?"

"Get your hands off of her, Kiro!" Kohaku fruitlessly tried to remove his tight grip from her neck. He did, however, succeed in giving her more air.

The tingling in her belly became a full-blown panic and Kagome barely held back a scream of frustration and fear. This 'Kiro' wasn't the man she had thought he was and she was about to pay with her life for the mistake. Moments of her life flashed before her eyes and she felt a deep regret for the time she had missed out on with Inuyasha. He had cared for her, in his own way, and she wished with all her might that she could have been strong enough to look past his childish behaviour...

With her eyes closed, the sound of a snarling growl convinced Kagome that she would soon meet her end. Instead, she found herself on the floor, coughing for air, her hand timidly laid on her own throat. Kohaku moved protectively between her and Kiro but not before Kagome saw a startling sight.

The Koga lookalike lay on his back on the floor and was being pummelled by a man with a long braid of black hair. Returning the attack furiously, Kiro fought back and managed to roll away and onto his feet. Both men crouched low to the ground waiting for the other to make a move. With a burst of speed, Kiro attacked Kagome's rescuer and they both ended up on the glass table, shattering it with their weight.

The pair rolled through the broken glass, both trying to get the upper hand while denying the other an opening. Finally Kagome's rescuer was on top again and she knew it was over, even as he continued to beat the living daylights out of her attacker.

"Kami, I think I need to sit down," Kagome murmured, not realizing that she was already, indeed, in a sitting position.

At the end of her sentence, a curious thing happened.

All motion stopped for a brief second and Kagome's rescuer turned wide eyes her way, both meeting in shocked recognition before he plummeted down on top of Kiro with the force of a powerful magic. Though his eyes were distinctly human, there was no mistaking the man behind the gaze.

Inuyasha.

Kagome stared wide-eyed in shock at the sight of a human Inuyasha laying prone on top of an unconscious Kiro (who looked so much like Koga). Kohaku didn't know what to do and just glanced between the two, knowing he was missing something big.

"Inu... yasha?" Kagome whispered, barely loud enough to be heard. As the half-demon raised his head, eyes filled with mute rage, Kagome knew without a doubt that he was her hanyou.

"I knew you wouldn't let me keep my fucking freedom, bitch!" Inuyasha spat, wiping blood from the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand.

"Hey, watch what you call my girlfriend, you jerk!" Once again, Kohaku valiantly tried to defend his girlfriend but only ended up at the wrong end of a deadly glare.

"Your girlfriend, huh?" The human-looking Inuyasha stood slowly, tense muscles expecting to be dropped back to the floor any instant. Locking eyes with Kagome, he spoke to Kohaku. "Funny that, seeing as she's my wife!"

Kagome's brow furrowed in frustrated confusion – was he just trying to scare Kohaku off or had she forgotten something very important about her last weeks in the feudal era?

When Kagome didn't deny Inuyasha's claim Kohaku's mouth dropped open in disbelief. Not knowing what to say, Kagome only realized after the fact what effect her silence had.

"Get out, both of you. I... I need to clean up this mess you made."

"Kohaku... I'm not... we're..." Two sets of searing eyes stopped her mid-sentence and she stood on shaking legs. "I... I'll call you later," Kagome whispered, noticing that Kohaku's mouth had taken the form of a thin line.

Moving to the door, Kagome took her jacket off of the hook and exited into the hallway, acutely feeling Inuyasha's presence right behind her.

"Figures I'd see you with the fucking son of that dead dumb wolf," Inuyasha grumbled barely loud enough for her human hearing to catch. "What did you do? Tell him you would fuck him and then start in on his roommate? We demons don't like being lied to..."

"Would you stop it!" Kagome demanded harshly, her voice quivering as she barely held back her tears. "I only met him today. He tried to kill me when I thought he was Koga..." Kagome looked sharply at Inuyasha as they stood in the empty hallway, her anger resurfacing at the insults he had thrown at her. "And where do you get off calling me your wife? You ripped my heart out once, are you trying to keep it away from anyone else?" she hissed, stepping forward in anger.

Giving a dark snort, Inuyasha growled and stepped toward her as well, mere millimetres separating the former lovers. "That's rich, coming from a woman who mated me one day then abandoned me the next. I bet you had a great laugh with Hobo while you were fucking him, huh? 'Lead the hanyou on', 'let him think he had something he wanted' then take it away..."

Kagome's eyes narrowed to mere slits, her indignation knowing no bounds. "I only ever wanted you, jackass! I needed you to be a man and you went ahead and showed me just how much of a boy you were. I couldn't stay there and watch you wave me around like some sort of trophy!"

The fire in Kagome's belly was raging now, the need to vent her anger growing with every fiery pulse.

Kagome found herself pinned to the wall once more, this time by her lips, as the hanyou before her groped blindly at her. Pulling her to his body, Inuyasha entangled one hand in her hair, his other hand nearly bruising her with his voracity. Kagome responded in kind, the burning in her belly resonating wildly.

Breaking away from the kiss, Inuyasha leaned his head on to Kagome's. With his eyes closed, his entire posture – one of barely restrained need – was at odds with his whispered words.

"Stay the fuck out of my life, bitch."

Open-mouthed, Kagome barely registered as Inuyasha pushed away from her, leaving her to watch as he stalked off, realizing too late that something was out of place. The slam of Kohaku's door brought her attention to what had been so wrong...

Kohaku had seen everything.

Worse, Inuyasha had meant for Kohaku to see everything.

Worst of all, it had meant nothing to Inuyasha.

Kagome felt her heart drop into her stomach as she realized Inuyasha had put on a show to destroy any chance she had with the kind-hearted man. For the first time in her life, Kagome let herself do something she never dreamed she would do.

Kagome swore.

. . . . . . . . . .

To Be Continued...

. . . . . . . . . .

Thanks to those of you who have reviewed:

slowfatbunny – Thanks for the encouragement. I guess this chapter answers some of your questions...

hareyu nami – Thanks!

Kasumi9-9 – I try to keep the characters in character, hopefully they stay that way for the whole story.

And for the rest of you: Please read and review!

~Sarga