Say It With A Straight Face
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summary: "Okay, Sasuke, here's how you can prove you don't like Sakura. Say 'I don't like Sakura' five times with a straight face!" "I don't -twitch- like Sakura -smirk-" "HA! YOU DO!" "SHUT UP! I JUST... HAD TO SNEEZE!" Sure. Sequel to "Just Press 'Send' "
timeline: The characters are juniors in high school; I've also lumped Neji, Tenten, and Lee in with the juniors, to make it easier. I've made Temari and Kankuro seniors. A/U
Chapter Two
deceiving fallen angel: Hey, guys! Because there were so many wonderful reviews for the first chapter, I've forced the Naruto cast to be here!!
cast: -miserably- Hello.
Sasuke: Cor, wake me up before 10 am on a Sunday again and you're dead.
deceiving fallen angel: -innocently- But Sasuke, if you killed me when I'm barely on chapter two, I'll never be able to write the parts where you and Sakura make out.
Sasuke: -flinches- -puts away kunai-
Sakura: Yay! Good job, Sasuke-kun!
Naruto: Seriously, if you killed Coraline, I wouldn't have anyone to talk to during my stupid, pointless, totally boring math class.
Kakashi: Hey, don't I teach math?!
all: ...
deceiving fallen angel: Noooooo... you teach pre-cal, silly! That's totally different.
others: Um... yeah! Yeah, totally. -cough-
Kakashi: Oh... okay!
Sakura: -nervous laugh- Uh, let's just get on with chapter two.
Sasuke and Sakura ran down the wide halls of the high school, trying to get to first period class, already seriously late. They finally burst into the classroom through the open door and looked around. Everyone was already there and staring at them. Even their famously super-late teacher. They'd arrived even after him?! Not good. Sakura would like to take this minute to point out that it is all Sasuke's fault because they had to stop at the band hall first to put away his 'stupid saxophone'. Sasuke would like to tell her to shut the hell up, and that his saxophone is less stupid that her.
"Sasuke. Sakura. You're late," Kakashi said sternly, raising an eyebrow. He was probably surprised that he, Hatake Kakashi, was lecturing his students on tardiness. Oh, what has the world come to?!
Sakura hung her head in embarrassment, sneaking a glare at her partner in tardiness and Sasuke simply met his teacher's stare blankly.
"I... assume you were doing something with... pocky?" Kakashi asked uncertainly, eying the teenagers in front of him, who were covered in pocky cream and crumbs of biscuit.
Sakura blushed and dug around in her bag. She pulled out the box of pocky she had managed to take back from Sasuke after he kidnapped it. It was slightly squished, rather beat up looking - especially after being unceremoniously stuffed into a saxophone case, and there was now only one stick left in the box. Sakura held it up.
Kakashi eyed the box and nodded. He pulled out the last piece and popped it in his mouth behind his mask, "Mmm... chocolate; my favourite. Okay, I guess you're not in trouble then," he grinned behind the cloth covering his mouth, "You can sit down now."
Sakura anime cried and Sasuke smirked.
They both sat down, Sasuke trying to trip Sakura on her way to her desk and her punching him hard in the shoulder.
Sakura's seatmate, Yamanaka Ino, laughed and leaned over to brush pocky out of Sakura's hair once her pink-headed friend had sat down beside her. Ino had somehow managed to become Sakura's best girl friend, even though they were total opposites.
"Hey, I'm gonna go to the mall after school. Wanna come with?" Ino asked, "I heard Shikamaru tell Kiba he'd go with him to check out some video game, which means he'll be with the guys, which means I can get a leg-up on Temari!"
"God, are you still stalking that poor boy, Ino?"
"Noooo, I just happened to hear that information, Miss I Assume The Worst In Everyone."
"Yeah. Right."
Ah, the blonde's three great loves: shopping, Nara Shikamaru, and trying to beat Temari to Shikamaru. The last one was most annoying. Those two girls were insane. Sakura shook her head to herself. According to Hyuga Hinata, they'd been competing for Shikamaru since seventh grade, getting crazier and more desperate each year. Sakura thought it was amazing that such a shopaholic, girly-girl and a cheerful, tomboyish senior could turn so... so... she couldn't even explain it... over some guy. Shikamaru was smart and pretty nice, but lazy as hell and almost as annoying on occasion. Not worth eight cat fights a day and a hell of a lot of plotting and revenge in Sakura's opinion.
"Ah, the moment we've all been waiting for," Kakashi said brightly as everyone moaned like they were dying of the stomach flu, or worse, for these poor students know what's coming, "Kakashi's fabulous two-hundred question pre-cal test! How fun is that?!"
No one answered.
The blond boy sitting beside Sasuke groaned again and slammed his head onto the desk. Sasuke felt like groaning too, but kept it in and rolled his eyes instead, smirking, for Uchiha's own two-hundred question pre-cal tests. The boy beside him glared out of the corners of his eyes and lifted his head at the other boy's smug expression.
"Think you're such a genius, Mr. Smart Ass Uchiha?! I swear, I'll make a better score on this than you!!" he slapped his hand on the desk. Believe it! I, Uzumaki Naruto, will kick your asssss!!!"
"Sit down, Naruto," Kakashi said in an annoyed voice.
Sasuke rolled his eyes as Naruto got ready to start back-talking Kakashi, and probably land himself in the principal's office, "Naruto, you have a D in this class right now; I have an A. Give. It. Up. Don't make a bigger fool of yourself that you already have," he paused, letting the insult sink in, "Dead last."
Naruto's tan face flushed beneath the whisker marks. Sasuke may be the hyper, blue-eyed, ramen-loving boy's best friend, but man was he getting on Naruto's nerves. Thinks he's so superior. Grr. Oh yeah? Two can play at this game.
Naruto grinned slyly and slid closer to Sasuke. He put his pinkie finger in the air and grinned at the annoyed expression on the dark-haired boy's face, "So you and Sakura are- ?" he shook his pinkie.
Sasuke punched Naruto so hard he fell out of his chair and into the middle of the aisle.
"OWWWWWWWWWWW!! WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!"
"Being a dobe. Dobe."
Naruto rubbed his face and glared as he sat up. He actually hadn't been expecting such a... strong... reaction from Sasuke. Heh, heh. No way was Naruto letting this go. This must mean something important.
"Sooooooooooo," Ino drawled, twirling a long strand of pale blonde hair from her ponytail around her finger, "What were you and Uchiha doing before class? Making out?" she asked eagerly.
Sakura rolled her eyes and flicked her in the head.
"No! Shut up, Ino. We were just late."
"Oh, Sakura," Ino smiled, "I totally know you like him."
Sakura gave her an annoyed look and wrote her name on her pre-cal test, "We're just friends, Ino."
"Sure."
"We are!!"
"Sure, sure... yeah... okay."
"I so hate you right now."
"QUIET, STUDENTS, THIS IS A TEST!!!"
Somehow they all managed to make it through pre-calculus alive, as Kakashi sat behind his desk with his feet propped up, reading his latest perverted book and ignoring the death glares most of his students were sending his way.
Sasuke and Sakura were sitting in physics a few hours later, bored and paying absolutely no attention to their teacher, Kurenai. Sasuke was watching Sakura scribble in her Fanfiction notebook under her desk in front of him, no doubt writing the next chapter to her latest story. He watched her scrawl furiously into the blue spiral, her green eyes bright with inspiration. She was totally zoned out. Sasuke absentmindedly watched her as he pushed his pen around with his finger, his eyes glazed over and not much better off than her.
"I will tell you your partners for your project tomorrow," Kurenai was saying, sending her half-dead students an annoyed look.
"YOUTHFUL KURENAI-SENSEI!! MAY I PLEASE BE WITH SAKURA?! SHE IS SO YOUTHFUL AND HIP!!" Rock Lee shouted from the front row, his eyes rounder than usual beneath his massive eyebrows.
"NO!! I'm Sakura's partner!!"
"No, me!!"
"MEEEEE!!"
-punch- -punch- -kick- -punch- -blows landing- -screaming-
" HEY, IF WE'RE PICKING PARTNERS, I CALL SASUKE!!"
"No, he's mine!!"
"Mine!!"
"What'd you say, bitch?!"
"Grrr!!"
-punch- -slap- -bite- -slap- -punch- -screaming-
Sasuke, Sakura, Kurenai, and some normal people all stared at the love-sick girls and slackers in disbelief. How are people like this in an Advanced Placement class anyway?
"ENOUGH!!" Kurenai finally shouted, "You know that only I can pick partners, so I'll be sure to not put you with whoever you just requested."
"AWWWWWWWW!!"
"Great, now I'll never pass without the nerd as my partner to do the work for me," some guy muttered to himself.
"SAKURA IS NO NERD!! SHE IS A BEAUTIFUL, YOUTHFUL BLOSSOM OF YOUTH!!"
"Oh yeah?"
"YEAH!"
-fighting sounds-
Um... let's skip to social studies.
Sakura plopped down beside Hyuga Hinata as their infamous teacher, 'Freaky Ibiki' scratched his nails on the blackboard for silence.
"Hey, Hinata," Sakura smiled as she wrestled with her overcrowded book bag for her world history textbook.
"Hi, Sakura."
"Yeah, hi, Sakura! Hinata!" Naruto yelled as he came dashing into the classroom, late mind you, and taking the seat on the other side of Sakura.
"Naruto," Sakura smirked at his hyper attitude.
"Eww! You remind me of teme when you do that!!" Naruto whined. He cringed, shaking his head back and forth as if it would erase his memory like an Etch-a-Sketch, "He was so mean to me in pre-cal! And that test was so hard! I probably got another 'D'. Stupid Sasuke-teme's gonna rub it in again." Sakura smirked again at her goofy friend.
"Gah! I'm going over here where it's normal and people don't remind me of Sasuke!" the blond whined, taking his books and sitting next to Hinata.
"Hey, Hinata!"
"H-h-hey, -gulp- N-n-n-naruto."
"Are you... feeling okay, Hinata? You look like you're going to faint. Oh, you probably just took the pre-cal test. I feel the same way..." he nodded his head understandingly.
"I-i-i'm good."
"SILENCE!!" Ibiki roared, slapping the desk with a ruler.
Um... social studies isn't very fun either, because the teacher is sort of... completely insane. It's pretty entertaining to Sakura though, who likes watching weird things happen to the colour of Hinata's face when she's around Naruto.
Ah, time for gym.
"MY YOUTHFUL STUDENTS WHO ARE FULL OF YOUTH AND BURSTING WITH HIP!! YOU ALL ARE SO HIP AND YOUTHFUL THAT YOU ALL ARE GOING TO RUN TWENTY LAPS!! OF YOUTH!!" Gai shouted, "AND LEE!! MY WONDERFUL LAD OF YOUTH AND PERFECT, YOUTHFUL HAIR!! YOU CAN RUN TWENTY AROUND KONOHA!! YOUTH LAD AWAY!!"
"OH, THANK YOU, MASTER!! I WILL USE MY YOUTHFUL POWERS TO MAKE YOU PROUD!!"
"LEE!!"
"MASTER!!"
"LEE!!"
"MASTER!!"
-hug-
"AND MAYBE WHEN I FINISH, SAKURA WILL BE SO IMPRESSED, SHE WILL GO OUT WITH ME!!" Lee sighed, pumping his fists, flames in his eyes, "I WILL DO IT!!" he flashed Sakura a shiny smile before running outside. "YOUTH LAD AWAY!!" Sakura hid behind Tenten until he left.
"You ready to run?" Tenten grinned, sprinting lithely over to Sakura and slapping her on the back.
"It's all I can do halfway decent in gym," Sakura moaned, sending her tomboy friend a glare as she laced up her gym shoes.
"Don't worry - I have your motivation," Tenten said slyly, patting the pocket of her uniform gym shorts. There was a bag of pocky inside, "Remember, catch me and it's yours," Tenten said in a sing-song voice.
Sakura really sucked at sports, while Tenten excelled. One day, the brunette found out that when Sakura was 'properly motivated' she wasn't half bad as a runner. And running was usually all Gai had them do.
The teens started their laps. Naruto and Sasuke jogged together and watched Tenten sprint her laps and Sakura speed behind her like a madwoman. If there hadn't been pocky involved, Sakura would probably have fainted by now. Okay, not really, she just wouldn't be sprinting her ass off with Tenten.
Sasuke wiped his hand across his sweaty forehead and watched the two girls with an amused expression. Naruto caught him looking and grinned. Time for his payback.
"So... you like Sakura?" he grinned.
"I told you, idiot, she's just my friend," Sasuke gritted out through his teeth, really not wanting to have to deal with Naruto and expend energy by punching him when he still six laps to go.
"I want proof then. Here's the fail-safe way: say "I don't like Sakura" five times with a straight face, and I'll know it's true," the blond grinned, shaking a sweaty piece of hair out of his eyes.
"That's stupid," Sasuke scoffed, wiping his forehead.
"You're just scared to do it," Naruto said, smirking.
"Fine," Sasuke growled, "I don't -twitch- like Sakura -smirk-..."
Naruto burst out laughing so hard he had to stop running and rest his hands on his knees, "You didn't even get through one time!! Man, have you got it bad!!"
"SHUT UP!! I JUST... HAD TO SNEEZE!!"
"Okay then," Naruto said, grinning as he caught Sasuke watching Sakura run with Tenten again.
The two girls finished their laps in record time as Gai applauded them enthusiastically on their youthfulness. Sakura collapsed and Tenten tossed her the pocky, grinning. The brunette giggled as Sakura laughed like a maniac and hugged her pocky as she rolled around on the floor.
deceiving fallen angel: Finally!! Chapter two is done!!
Sasuke: -pout- Could you quit making Naruto bug me in the story? I don't like it.
deceiving fallen angel: No! -laughs maniacally- Since when has that ever stopped me before?
Sasuke: -takes out kunai-
Kakashi: No! Remember the make-out scenes, Sasuke! Just remember the make-out scenes!!
Sakura: -cute anime eyes- For me, Sasuke-kun?
Sasuke: Grr... -puts away knife, once again.
Naruto: Someone's feeling a little violent this chapter.
Kakashi: You're telling me.
Alright, that little bit of comedy was for those of you who asked for the conversations from previous stories. That's the last time I'm doing them as well, so this is farewell. Well, I hope you all are enjoying the story as much as I'm enjoying writing it.
This chapter is for my precious Matt. I remember when I failed the 'straight face' with his name. -grins sheepishly- Anyway, love you, Matt.
I appreciate the feedback, guys. Thanks eternally, and much love!