Title: NOTHING FOR CHRISTMAS
Author: Jagfan724
Date: Oct. 28, 2006
"Harm?"
"Yes?"
"What is this?"
"What is what?"
"This thing over here in the box. It's got holes in it and I swear it's making noises."
"Oh, that. Nothing."
"Nothing doesn't whine, Harm."
"Nothing is your Christmas present."
"Nothing better not be what I think it is."
"And what if it is nothing? What if you like nothing?"
"Harm, I'm pretty sure that that little nothing is going to turn out to be a great big something."
"Honey, you'll really like this something, I promise."
"That's what you said about your meatless meatloaf, too."
"Well, this time, I know you'll like this something."
"And just who is going to be taking care of this something? Certainly not this pregnant Marine."
"Are you saying you won't be able to handle a baby and this little something?"
"By the time this baby comes out, that little something will have grown into a not-so-small something. An both will have to be potty-trained, thankfully one later than the other."
"Besides, I'll help. And the baby will have protection, a little guard something, so to speak."
"You'd better help!"
Pause.
"So do I get to open my Christmas present now?"
"I don't think I could hold you off any longer. Go ahead."
Pause again as present is unwrapped and lid taken off box.
"Oh, Harm. She's so cute."
"I have good taste."
"I know, you married me, after all. And you've named her, too?"
"I know, it's a good name, don't you think?"
"Harm? What were you thinking with a name like this?"
"Hey!"
"Poor little baby, he just didn't know you at all, did he? Naming you 'squid', indeed. Doesn't he know you're going to be my little Jarhead?"
"Mac! You've got to be kidding me! What was wrong with Squid?"
"Everything, but at least you didn't name her nothing."
AN: In case you didn't figure it out, the present was a puppy. You can pick the breed. It's been a while, but the plea is still the same, please take the time to review! Look for more to come soon, too. Thanks!