Complicated

Disclaimer: As always, I do not own anything.

Thanks for the reviews, I really liked them.

Chapter 8: Contemplating Children

A few days after the incident everything went back to normal for Calleigh. Finally it turned out that she moved to Ryan, though just temporarily, and after the change in their relationship it didn't matter anymore who knew about it. Horatio had nothing against it until it'd interfere with their work.

After the night they had spent together Calleigh decided that that relationship was definitely worth a shot. She loved Ryan and he loved her. It was perfect. She'd just have to tell him that she was expecting a baby. Another man's baby. It couldn't be that difficult, could it?

Well, it turned out to be rather difficult…

One morning she was sitting by the dining table waiting for Ryan to finish the shower. She didn't feel quite well that morning and Ryan also noticed it. He always noticed if something was off with Calleigh. And that was the reason why she was determined to tell him the truth. It was better to get through with it than waiting for Ryan to find it out.

When Ryan entered the kitchen fresh out of shower she took a deep breath and turned towards him.

"Look, Ryan. We have to talk."

"Wow, Cal. It sounds serious." He said smiling while he took his way towards the coffee machine. He was in a fairly high spirit that morning.

"It is." Calleigh replied in a serious tone which swept the smile off of Ryan's face.

"Okay." He said with a sigh and sat down next to her now feeling rather uneasy. "Spill it!"

"I … Well…" She looked down at her hands which were resting on the table in front of her and took a deep breath. "I… I haven't found a place yet." That was it. She was a chicken. Again. Since they were together she tried to tell him at least about a dozen times. Well, it might be a little exaggerated but she certainly tried. However, finally she always came up with something else to say.

Ryan's face lit up again.

"Is that all?" He asked smiling while putting a hand on hers then stood up and went back to fill his mug. Once the mug was in his hand he stood behind Calleigh, who was still banging her head into the table in her mind because she was such a coward, and kissed her head. "You know that it's not a problem at all. I like having you here."

Calleigh looked up at him and offered him a weak smile.

"I like being here, too."

"That's good to hear. Maybe you should stop searching." With that he gave him a short kiss on her mouth then proceeded to sit down again when it suddenly hit him what he had just implied to. He sat down with his uneasy demeanor returned and looked at the woman next to him.

Calleigh was speechless. The truth was that she hadn't even kept a newspaper in her hand for weeks not to mention looking for an apartment. She kept avoiding the subject of finding an own place but would it be a good idea to move in together? Well, technically they were living together for weeks now…

"I think so, too." She answered before she could complete the argumentation in her head. For a moment she was afraid that she had said the wrong thing and brought a bad decision but the smile on her lovers face quickly chased this fear away.

She quickly made another decision.

She would talk with him… and very soon…

CSI MIAMI CSI MIAMI CSI MIAMI

The day passed quickly without any particular event. Evidence was processed, paperwork was done and finally the afternoon found the little group of CSIs plus a lab tech in a cozy little café near the beach.

"Aren't they cute?" Natalia asked while she was watching several children playing on the sandy beach.

At this all of the occupants of the table looked towards the beach.

"Yeah. You know, sometimes I really envy those people." Eric replied with a wishful expression on his face.

"Wow, Eric. Do I understand it well that you are ready to settle down?" Valera asked in disbelief, the children momentarily forgotten.

"If I find the right girl, yes, I am. It was never a question."

"Oh, it's sweet. I can't wait the little Delkos running around."

"You're right, Natalia. And what about our other handsome gentleman here? Are you ready to have a family, too?" Valera turned towards Ryan.

"Yeah, Wolfe? Do you want children? I mean it can't be easy with your OCD."

Calleigh, who was staring at her plate since the subject of kids came up, shot up her head at this. Ryan's OCD. She hadn't thought about it before. She always was afraid of him not being ready to be a father or not wanting to have another's man child or something along that line. But his OCD. It was a completely other question. She couldn't expect him to change his whole way of life. Not to mention that he couldn't do it even if he had wanted it.

Suddenly she felt sick. She felt dizzy so she had to grab the table to steady herself. Somewhere in the distance she heard somebody calling her name. She tried to concentrate and finally managed to refocus her attention on the conversation which was currently going on.

Four pairs of concerned eyes were looking at her.

"Sorry, I just zoned out for a second. What are you talking about?"

"We just asked you what you think about what Ryan has just told us. After all you are now a couple. You might have a say in this." Valera offered.

Calleigh looked at Ryan. She had no idea what he could have said but the expression on his face told everything that Calleigh had to know. She swallowed a large and felt the tears coming. She quickly excused herself and went to the bathroom.

After the door closed behind her she was just standing in the lady's room staring into the mirror in front of her. By that time her eyes became red and her face was tearstained but she didn't wipe the tears away. She just stood there staring into nothingness. All she could see was Ryan's unsure and guilty face. Suddenly a wave of nausea hit her. She ran into one of the booths and emptied her stomach.

As she was sitting on the cold bathroom floor in front of the toilet she remembered what happened a few weeks earlier. Now, after that so many things had happened, good and bad as well, she felt the same again.

She was right where she had started.

But then she heard the door open and not long after it she found herself in the arms of Ryan. She wanted to hit him and scream at him but she couldn't. She just relaxed into his embrace as they were sitting on the floor and clung to him. She couldn't help it but in spite of the fact that he had just broken her heart with a simple look, she still felt safe in his arms.

When did her life become so complicated?

TBC