All because of a damn cold

All because of a damn cold.

Chapter five;

Roy, pictures, chicken soup.

Big thanks to Coopers-Muse, rry, VenusOfHectare (god i hope i spelled that right)and Ria (well if you not new and your not old then…Your ORIGINAL!)- For the lovely reviews!

also thanks to shenna95 for the favorite add, and to Monkon Soel for a story alert. i am glad i am still gaining interest!

Just remember every one! I don't get reviews; I don't get inspiration (funny enough that seems to stem from the reviews…) I don't find the motivation to write (this also has a strange connection to reviews). Then I don't write!

So please R&R!

And now for the chapter you have all been waiting for!

On with the show!

Disclaimer; they own the neighborhood, I just rent the house.

Belledonna

Edward threw the door to Mustang's inner office wide. The left heel of his boot digging indents into the wood and splintering the frame. He sagged, the burst of energy fading now he did not have Hawkeye's gun barrel pointed at him.

"Well, nice of you to finally join us, Fullmetal, were you planing on repairing the door? Or am I going to replace it again?"

"Hay Maes." Edward mumbled as he saw the intelligence officer, ignoring the colonel with as much maturity as a three-year-old.

"Hay Edward, you don't look so good buddy," Maes observed, watching as Edward flopped boneless onto the leather couch. "I know just what will cheer you up!"

A noise that sounded very much like a groan of internal bowl problems –or the mental and emotional pain of having to be subjected to yet more pictures- emitted from the curled up lump in the center of the sofa. "Please Maes," the lump begged in a broken voice, "no more pictures, there's only so much a man can take!"

"Pictures? What pictures?" Maes asked innocently, in the background mustang muttered something that sounded like 'what man?' but it was lost in the sound of Maes one handedly struggling to stuff the mass amounts of glossy paper back into his top pocket. "I was…er merely suggesting…that erm, Gracia makes the worlds best chicken soup, and I am sure once you've had a cup or two, you'll be feeling bright eyed and bushy tailed, ready to play with my daughter while your babysitting her!"

"You're letting that look after your precious baby girl?" Roy asked loud enough to be heard over Edwards's shrieks about babysitting, chicken soup, and something obtuse about mucus.

"We have the entire house wired, Roy, we will be hearing every move he makes," Maes' eyes shifted suspiciously, tapping the side of his nose. "And besides, Alphonse called; said he needed a favor, something about the Rockbell girl I think."

"Ah," Roy and Maes shared a knowing look.

"Hay wait a second, isn't that my dressing gown? My dressing gown that appears to be covered in milk?" Maes said, eyes narrowing in on the bright monstrosity.

In less than the time it took Maes to whip out a photo, Edward had rolled from the leather couch and ripped the obnoxious article of clothing from his back, clapped and turned it into a bright yellow duckie–it seemed to be a radioactive duckie, if the way it glowed had any effect- with armored helmet. He immediately picked it up and begin repeatedly throwing, punching, kicking and at one stage biting the offending Alphonse-duck. Jump starting straight into another rant;

"I TOLD HIM IT DIDN'T MATTER ABOUT THE SNOT!" Edward howled, Maes and Roy took cover behind the large desk just in time to miss the splatter of fluorescent duck now smeared to the back of a recently vacated chair and coating the office walls. " What, dose he think I'm THREE?! DOSE HE THINK I AM SMALL ENOUGH THAT I WOULD LET HIM DRESS ME IN ANYTHING?!"

"Your brother dresses you?" mustang queried from his safe spot behind Maes and under the desk. "Well actually that would explain a few things…"

"NO! Of course not, you bastard! He must have switched my coat while I wasn't paying attention! STUPID DUCK!"

…

...

Fifteen minuets later; one former dressing gown down; one duck missing –though it was kinda hard not to notice were it might be, now that all the surfaces in the office were coated in fluorescent yellow. -; One Elric, down and presumed asleep.

"So what do we do with him now?" Roy asked, prodding Edwards flesh foot with a sharp end of a pencil.

"Eh, well we cant just take him back to Alphonse, I do not want to know what even might be happening behind those –thankfully- closed doors," Maes shuddered, "I'll take him back to my place. Come on Roy, help me get him to the car."

With much grunting the two men managed to get the young alchemist of the couch and into a rather awkward carrying pose; his arms grasped by Maes and his legs held gingerly by Roy. Edward's drooling face barely inches from the floor. And though his nose scraped against the carpet with each movement, Edward failed to come out of his semi-comatose state.

"Well he certainly is heavier than I expected," Maes mused as the sleeping Elric let out a sleep-addled murmur. "And Elysia would just hate it if I broke my back carrying him –I couldn't give the cuteness shoulder rides! - Gee thanks for offering to carry him Roy!"

Before mustang could even think of a protest or witty remark, a bundle of blond was thrown into his arms, leaving him staggering a few steps before he regained his balance –though he would later deny he ever lost it-.

Maes waved him to follow as he bolted from the room, leaving a confused and pissed off mustang carrying the sleeping Elric, princess style, staggering after him.

Roy reached the bottom of the stairs breathless, the blond in his arms had griped his shirt with his automail arm and wedged his other arm under the fabric, bear skin on skin. But that isn't the reason I am breathless! Roy though to himself, I am breathless because he is sooo fucking HEAVY! And that explains the flush too!

"Bout' time you showed up Roy," Maes said from his position sitting atop a military car, the driver nowhere in sight –probably ran for his life at the sight of Hughes, Roy reasoned, it was what he would do in the drivers place after all-. "Now get your bundle of fun into the back."

"Well Ed's automail is heavy even if the rest of him isn't. And if you think it's so fun, then you should carry him back up the stairs. And he is NOT mine." Roy said as he awkwardly opened the back door with the tips of his occupied fingers, Maes made no move to help him and just sat in the drivers seat, sniggering as he watched his best friend in the side-view mirror.

"Nah, you're just getting fat."

"I AM NOT FAT! I just haven't had time to go to the gym! And you can't say anything! I mean child birth hasn't been good on you, Maes, it's ruined your figure and given you love handles." Roy smirked, bashed his head on the door frame and fell head over heals forward into the backseat, a heavy lump with an steel –literally- grip pinning him to the car floor.

"I'll have you know Gracia thinks my figure is 'homely'. Ohh and that reminds me, we still need to find YOU a wife! Now get your fat ass into the front seat."

"Ugh, Maes, I have a slight problem. Help?"

Maes looked over the front seat at his best friend who was being smothered by a sleeping Edward. Maes couldn't hold back the laugh that bubbled from his throat. Not that mustang didn't notice, he just chose to ignore his idiotic friends sense of humor –or lack there of-.

"So… Duckie dressing gown to go with your matching pajamas? Eh? What the hell has Gracia done with the Maes I used to know?" Roy shook his head in 'remorse', staring at his 'ex-best-friend' before becoming preoccupied with the object intent of forcing all the air from his lungs. "At least I know I was right about what Edwards wears to bed, and I don't know if that a good thing or a bad thing."

The youth on Mustangs chest was wearing nothing but stripy blue and white boxers with his usual black combat boots witch were currently trying to gouge through Roy's ribs.

"Except the shoes, I would never have guessed Alphonse would let Edward sleep in those."

…

Mustang spent the rest of the trip on the car floor being used as a pillow by the unconscious blond. (witch he would also deny under toucher at a later date.)

and in Roy's eyes; it was all Maes' fault.

And all because of one damn cold.

XXX

Belledonner.