Warning: Contains spoilers for LaFleur. Mild language, mentions of sex. Juliet/Sawyer.
Summary: Juliet thought she'd been left with second best, and by God, she'd never been so wrong.
Disclaimer: I don't own Lost.
Juliet was used to being second best. She'd been married to a man (Edmund, dead, thankfully) who's main ambition in their marriage was to flaunt his sexual prowess to her by bringing home younger, prettier women, pretending (Do me the respect of not pretending, Juliet thinks bitterly, trying to ignore the noises coming from the other room, trying to concentrate on her work.) that she wasn't absolutely nothing to him. Fine. That was fine. She'd pretended remorse at his death, but all she could think was, Thank you, God.
Ben was different. His obsessive interest left her wishing that she was second best, at least in his eyes. Years of playing passive-aggressive, (no thanks, I don't feel like joining you for dinner tonight) avoiding his piercing gaze, turning frantically to Goodwin (She was still second best to him) hoping maybe he would get it through his dense, narrow-minded head that she didn't want to be with him. It didn't work, ending with tears and a stake through a (relatively) innocent man's heart.
Jack. Oh, Jack. (I would have given you my heart, if you had asked.) For him, it was always Kate. What's Kate doing, where is she, what's she thinking, who's her guy-of-the-moment. (Look, Kate's watching. Better kiss Juliet.) She pretended not to know, trying to lose herself in the lie. Eventually, though, and it killed her, she had to acknowledge the fact that, for Jack, she would never be more than a replacement. Second best.
So, when she stays for James, when they kiss for the first time, she sees something on his face. Second best.
It occurs to her that he suffered through the same psychological (she hesitates to say trauma. Torture? Maybe.) hurt and anguish that she did; being second best, watching Jack, handsome, whole, perfect Jack, ride off into the sunset with beautiful, special, perfect Kate. After a while of being Jack's shadow, agreeing with everything he said, she began to see James as just that; second best. When the island started moving, when Jack and Kate left the island, and ran straight to each other's beds (You don't know that, she tells herself. Yes, I do, the realistic part replies), all she could think was; just until they come back. Just until Jack returns.
Then she starts to notice things, like how he always has something to say, funny, rude, or just plain true. How his eyes were filled with tears when John fell down the well, crushing (or so they thought) all hopes of being saved. You got my back? He asks, and she sees he genuinely trusts her with his life. She always says, Yes.
She starts to notice, to pay attention, and it's not long until she stops thinking of him as second best, not as good, mediocre. It's when they kiss for the first time, Juliet looks at him, and all thoughts of unworthiness and not good enough fly out the window. And the way he looks at her erases any feelings, dark thoughts of the exact same doubts she had for him. She's not a piece of shit, a tag-along burden, and for once she's found a guy capable of acknowledging that.
When Jack and Kate left the island, Juliet thought she'd been saddled with second best. Now she could proudly state that, by God, she'd never been so wrong.