Through all my agony, I still found the heart to marvel at the scenery as I stepped off the plane. The sky was an eloquent azure color that was a deep contrast with the dark beige and orange hues of the city that loomed behind the airport. I scanned the horizon for any clues of where either Volturi's lair or Edward might be, but I found none. As we entered the airport, I thought of something else.

"Alice?" I asked with a barely audible voice.

Yes?" she replied in a slightly more vivacious tone.

"Where is he going to be?"

"Huh?"

"Where will Edward be? We're looking for a needle in a haystack."

"Oh, yeah," she replied. "Well, I can check his surroundings in the vision, but I'm pretty sure that he is located near the Volturi."

Pretty sure isn't good enough, I thought. But of course, I would never tell Alice that. That would make her angry, and the last thing I need is an angry Alice.

I nervously looked around. The airport ceiling was tall with huge glass windows taking the place of portions of the walls, much like Edward's house. Like his room. So much between us had happened in the room. His room was the last place I saw him before he left. Before I cheated.

"Maybe we should go to the place we found him last time he came here."

"I don't know," she said. "I guess it's worth a try."

I sighed and turned on my cell phone to see if anybody had called me. I had two missed calls: one from Jacob and one from Charlie. Charlie. Jacob. Both deserve an explanation; neither would get the truth.

"Are we stealing a car again?" I asked.

"Do we have time to buy one?" she retorted. "Stay there." At vampire speed, she ran into the rental car lot and climbed into a yellow Porsche. Before anyone noticed, she sped the car out of the lot and pulled next to me. Grinning, she said, "Climb in."

I rolled my eyes. You could have picked something a little less inconspicuous, couldn't you?"

"Nope," she said.

The second I closed my door, she slammed her foot down on the pedal and zoomed down the highway. While I was immediately pressed against my seat by the force of her speed, Alice was sitting as straight as she would if the car was not moving in the first place. Turning towards the window, I felt as if I was going to throw up.

"Hang in there, Bella," she said. "It'll be ok."

I crossed my arms and sank down lower into my chair. As much as I tried, I could not keep the tears away. I felt the first warm drop slide down my face, then another and another. I could tell that Alice was pretending not to notice and I was grateful for that. Right now, I just needed to be alone, or with Edward. Preferably the latter.

"Check on him!" I suddenly burst out!

Alice jumped. "Bella," she said, annoyed. "Calm down! I will tie you to your chair if you do not calm down."

I jumped in my seat as she snapped at me and my seat belt burned my collarbone. I tried to laugh at her threat but what came out was only a whimper.

Suddenly, after about a minute of complete silence, I had a thought. "Alice!" I shouted.

"Bella!" she yelled just the tiniest but louder. "Calm the hell down!"

I could see the anger in her darkened topaz glare. "That's not what I meant."

Alice relaxed slightly and looked at me in a somewhat less intimidating way. "Then what is it?" she asked while driving as if her eyes were glued to the road.

"You're driving 60 miles an hour. That'd be great if we were on a highway, but we're on a crowded road. And our car isn't exactly inconspicuous."

She turned back to the road. "Again, it's a fine or your love."

I crossed my arms and stared ahead. We were speeding down the ancient streets of Volturra until the large square near the clock tower came into view. Alice pushed the gas pedal down even further until we made a rough stop at the outskirts of the plaza. People around us were looked shocked that a bright yellow Porsche just screeched into the square and stepped back quickly into a distorted half circle.

"Now what?" I asked.

"This is all up to you," she said quickly. "I take it there's no plan?"

"Plan?"

"What are you going to do? I can't get out of the car in this light; I'll get killed."

My eyes grew wide. I'd have to be bold. I started to hyperventilate until Alice interrupted me.

"Bella! Stay calm. When Edward realizes what you did to get him back, he'll so appreciative. Maybe he'll even-"

"We do not need to discuss Edward's various appreciation-showing methods." Although my outward appearance stayed the same, my insides turned somersaults when I mentioned his name. Taking a deep breath, I opened the door and stepped out. "This is for you, Edward," I muttered, feeling the strange sensation the name gave me.

As I walked towards the crowd, people began to shout. "What do you think you doing?" they cried in various accents. They looked angry, but I had to confront them.

"Que pensez-vous que vous faites, vous stupide-tête?" a French man in a black bowler hat shouted into my face. "Vous ne pouvez pas bombarder en place d'une rage sauvage avec un permis de conduire licsense!"

I stumbled, trying to remember the little French I knew. "Uh, je ne speaké pas French?"

I looked down to see a young girl tug on the man's long trench coat. "Papa," she said, her blonde curls bouncing, "La dame ne parle pas français!"

I quickly walked away from the man.

"Excuse me!" I shouted, attempting to get a small portion of the crowd's attention. "Has anybody seen a tall, pale man with bronze hair?" I asked, still at the same volume. "Anybody?" Nobody answered. Stumped, I thought about what to say next. Oh! I thought. Quickly I added, "He may or may not sparkle!"

With that, a group of girls about my age perked up. "I've seen a man like that," one of them said in a British accent.

"Is he possibly gorgeous beyond compare?" another asked with a laugh.

"That's him!" I exclaimed, not feeling myself. I felt out of character, if that's possible to feel. "Where did he go?"

"Down that alleyway," said the first girl, pointing towards an all too familiar lane, one where I had always dreaded and dreamed about in only my nightmares.

My heart dropped what felt like a hundred miles and my head began to swim. "Down there?" I croaked.

"Yeah, but that was hours ago. I haven't seen him since."

I managed to thank them and then hopelessly trudged back to the car. I opened the door and stared at Alice with the saddest face I had ever worn. Her eyes grew large as she asked me what I heard.

"Some girls saw him go to Volturi. But he never came back."

Silence. We simply sat there, attempting to comprehend what I had just heard.

"Try and see him in a vision," I suggested.

She closed her eyes for a few seconds, maybe ten or fifteen, but then opened them up again in despair.

"Bella!" she said in anguish. "Bella, I- I can't!"

"Does this mean-" I tried to say, but my voice cracked.

Through what could have been tears if vampires could cry, Alice nodded her head. I moaned in agony as I sobbed into her shoulder. Edward was gone, gone, gone! No more lullabies, no more meadow, no more anything. Just an empty, broken heart.

Both plane rides home were completely silent. In the air, the two of just sat their in complete sadness while the world around us moved on as if it had not even been scratched. But, in the lives of Alice and me, there was more than merely a dent. There was complete portion of our happiness that had been wrenched out of placed all because of me.

"I'm sorry," I said. "I really am. This is all my fault."

Alice took a deep breath. "No it's not. It's not your fault that you suffered from amnesia; that was a cause of a noble act; you were trying to prevent Jacob from harm. It's not your fault that you lost your love for Edward. Not everything can be blamed on others, Bella. Just remember that."

As Alice finished speaking, she pulled up into my driveway. "I think you should get some sleep," she advised. "You've had a rough week."

A week? Only that long? It seemed like years since I last Edward last held me in his arms. I nodded at Alice. Without a word, I climbed out her car and walked into my house. In the entry way stood Charlie, purple with rage. Despite his apparent wish for an explanation, I pushed him and said, "I'm eighteen, Dad. I can make my own decisions."

Dumbstruck, he faltered for a moment and his fade turned to a normal color. As I walked upstairs, I could hear him talking, his voice slowly fading. "B-Bella, you disappeared for three and a half days without an explanation. I have a right to be…"

And then I slammed the door. I feel the floor in tears for I had nothing else to do. The center of my universe was gone because of me. For hours I laid there, just crying my heart out until the tears would no longer come. Then I fell asleep.

When I finally came to my senses, it was six o'clock, the sun low in the sky. Charlie must have lifted me onto my bed because I distinctly remembered falling asleep on the floor. I could smell the aroma of dinner wafting into my room, but I wasn't hungry.

At that moment, something caught my eye. The sun was reflecting off an object, a silver object. My cars keys. That got me thinking.

I robotically jumped out of bed and grabbed my keys. Running downstairs, I ignored the calls from Charlie and made my way out to my car. I was on a mission.

I climbed into the black, shiny car that Edward had bought me and sped off as fast I could go. Making a beeline for La Push, I opened the window to let the cool, fresh air circulate. I wasn't feeling myself; I threw back my head and laughed. After all that crying, all I could do was laugh.

I checked the speedometer; I was going a hundred and five miles per hour. Not fast enough.

Too delirious to notice how beautiful the trees looked in the sunset, I drove on, speeding as I went. In the distance, I saw cliff I once dove off so long ago. It seemed like centuries.

At a hundred and twenty-five miles per hour, I drove off that very same cliff into the sparkling ocean below.